The sixth part ((frerard))
Chapter 3 // I've got a migraine
Gerard POV
I am so freaking relieved to have told frank. I’m so happy he doesn’t hate me. I do wonder if he has an ulterior motive, I wasn’t expecting him to be so cool with it. I mean how do I know I can trust him? He could easily tell the whole school. This could also easily be a trick. G comforts me reminding me that deep down I know my worries are illogical. It’s quite an odd day, very noisy. I don’t pay much attention in art, just drawing without thinking and listening to everyone talking. G and Party are chatting to eachother and Saviour keeps talking to me, it’s quite distracting. I don’t even know what they on about but their voices are still comforting despite everything.
“Come on!” Frank calls. It’s the end of the lesson. I’m irritated by the lack of productivity, it’s my favourite subject and I need to do well in it but the guys aren’t exactly making concentrating easy. I really want to go to art school but everything thinks I have no future because I don’t talk. I mean it’s most likely true but a picture speaks a thousand words and all that. It’s just annoying because if I wanna get anywhere I have to motivate myself because everyone else seems to write me off. The schools meant to be the ones educating and encouraging me. If anything school, both the teachers and pupils put me down. But I’ll get my revenge. Okay I’m not gonna be chopping their heads off or anything like that. That doesn’t mean to say hypothetically I wouldn’t enjoy it though. I’ll just show them later, I’ll laugh as they serve me McDonalds while I’m heading off to go and pick up my latest Eisner award. G got one of those apparently.
We have English second. We have a supply teacher who just sticks on a movie but she’s one of those strict supplies. They are a rare beast but they’re normally dickheads. Like this woman is head of the English department and doesn’t normally teach so she simply presses a play button but yells every time someone moves slightly. And Frank and I are made to sit right in front of her so I can’t even write him notes. In situations like this however being apparently a complete nutter is handy because I just chat to the guys. Party and G are discussing comics and I decide to join in.
‘G, can we make a joint comic together sometime?’ I ask ‘Just me and G’. I have a lot of love for G, he’s like an uncle, he’s full of love and positivity and always makes me smile. He’s like a parent figure almost, normally the one to bring some common sense to us all. But also the one who makes me giggle until my stomach physically hurts. I wish he would get to know the outside world though. I know Frank and him would get on like a house on fire.
‘Yes!’ He replies ‘Maybe we could base a character off of your little crush’
‘G!!’ I cry ‘But yes please’
We get lost in conversation about this idea, discussing his aesthetic and characteristics. Party interjects from time to time but respects the fact G and I are having some time to ourselves. It’s quite nice.
The film stops and it’s the end of the lesson. Frank and I pack up and head to break.
“I really appreciate you telling me about all your uh alters” He tells me.
I smile back in response and we head outside. I wonder about whether to invite Frank round mine. I feel so comfortable in his presence I don’t really want to say bye to him especially after what I told him. I’ve only known him for a day what is wrong with me.
‘Love’ party pipes up.
‘What? I don’t love him okay I fancy him a bit but I don’t know him well enough to be in love’ I explain
'Yeah but the brain chemicals have clicked now ya know there’s no denying it, now your goal is to get to know about him so you can 'love’ him. And hopefully you’ll achieve that by inviting him round’ They tell me.
'Okay okay’ Party’s right. As fucking always.
Once we sit down I text my mum. The conversation goes exactly how I expect.
Me: I haven’t asked him yet but am I allowed to bring someone round tonight?
Seconds later I get a reply.
Mum: Yes!! Gerard, I’m so glad to see you making friends!
Me: Thanks :)
'Fuck yes’Party squeals.
I can’t be bothered to get my sketchpad out my bag so I just text frank instead. Plus, I’m not liking how many pages I’m filling up lately.
Me:Do you wanna come round mine afterschool?
“Would that be okay?” Frank asks, reading my text.
Me:Yes! I just asked my mum
“Sure” he smiles. Party squeals for the second time. “You okay?” he asks.
Me: Yeah fine?“You seem distracted?”
Me: That’d be the 3 people having discussions in my head
'If you want us to be quiet we will’ Saviour tells me while I type.
'Its okay I like it really’I reply.
“That must feel really weird” frank comments
Me: I’d think it feels really weird having only one of you. Like doesn’t it get lonely?? What if you get hurt?? Do you just have to deal with it??
“Well yeah I guess. I mean your thing sounds like it could be really good in some situations like could you go out and do loadsa fun and reckless stuff then just hide away and let one of the other ones deal with the consequences”
'ahem party?’I hear G tease.
Me: theoretically yes but that’s kinda dickish. Like party used to do that a bit and I was normally left to pick up the pieces. But it would affect us all in the all in the end and we kinda just silently agreed to not do that kinda stuff
Suddenly the bell rings and we have to go to our next lesson. DT. To my dismay I realise Frank and I are in different groups, he’s doing graphic design, I’m doing resistant materials. The lesson goes quickly, it is one of the most enjoyable, I just wish Frank was here too. I feel oddly lost without him which is worrying. I shouldn’t be this dependant on an almost stranger. Everyone’s being really loud but I try and block it out and focus on the work. We’re making keychains, completely from scratch, we’re melting the metal and everything ourselves which is awesome if pretty scary. I think I’m going to give mine to frank.
'Hey!’party cries'not gonna give anything to your best friend?’
'Do you not remember how many flower crowns and feather boas I bought for you at Christmas?’ I giggle
'Yes very appropriate for the festive occasion’they tease.
'Don’t pretend like you didn’t love it’
After a few minutes, G joins our discussion. We chat about all the comics we got him and he rambles about how his are coming along, it’s all he ever talks about these days. I withdraw myself from the conversation but they keep talking and it’s kinda getting on my nerves. By lunchtime it’s incredibly noisy, party and G are debating something, I don’t bother trying to work out what. It’s not angry or anything it’s just passionate in an almost positive way. But it’s really distracting and I wish they’d just give it a rest or chat where I can’t hear. Frank and I eat lunch and he talks to me every now and then. I nod and listen to him talk about tattoos I think but I don’t really pay much attention, which I feel guilty for. The combination of the buzz of the canteen, my thoughts, Frank’s rambling and the other’s chatting makes it hard to focus on any one thing.
We have music last lesson which is awesome. Frank and I work in pairs to create a piece to perform. I get to play the xylophone while he plays guitar. He’s incredibly talented but Party and G ruin the moment, they talk all the way through so I can barely hear it. Throughout the lesson the external and internal noise increases.
“Are you okay?” Frank asks, a tone of concern in his voice. I shake my head “What’s wrong?” I grab a bit of paper next to us.
'Nothing it’s just everyone’s really loud, they’re normally quite quiet, I hardly payed any attention to your guitar playing because they were talking right over it’ I write.
'Can you make them be quiet’I whisper to saviour, hoping for a response.
'Yes of course’He smiles before yelling 'G! Party! Shut the hell up!’
I flinch at the shout but relish in the moment of stunned silence. It doesn’t last long because soon G and Party erupt with 'It’s not fair’s and 'But we weren’t even loud’s. It fades out pretty quickly though and although I can still hear them, it’s less intense and I can focus a bit now. I watch frank’s fingers dance over the guitar’s fretboard and I realise how amazing he actually is. It blows my mind.
“Do you want me to play you a song quickly?” He asks.
I nod excitedly. I watch him as he prepares himself for a moment. It’s so cliché but he really does have gorgeous eyes, they are big and full of emotion, a golden hazel colour. He seems more relaxed now than he has been so far, he’s clearly in his zone when he plays. Softly he picks at the strings and after a few moments begins to sing quietly. His voice is hypnotic, expressive but with a hint of vulnerability. It has an interesting tone to it, like nothing I’ve heard before. As the song goes on he gets more and more into it, strumming like it’s the most natural thing in the world and singing without a care. Once he’s done I can’t do anything other than grin up at him like a Cheshire cat.
“Was I any good?” He asks
'Fucking incredible’ I write on a scrap of paper.
“Anyway we’ve wasted half the lesson, we should probably get on with the task”
I nod in agreement and listen as he explains some of his ideas. I love writing music but I don’t know much of the technical things like Frank does so I let him take the lead. After all, I’m the one on the xylophone. Having said that, the xylophone is quite fun to play. That combined with Franks guitars makes me wonder if we should start a twenty one pilots tribute act. I find myself quite relaxed, enjoying the lesson. However, the more sucked in I get the more I feel Party pushing, wanting out. They love music much more than me and are full of ideas. After a while, I catch myself letting go slightly before forcing myself into staying in control a few times. I struggle to focus on the grand total of 3 notes I have to play, tripping up and zoning out. I scribble out a note to frank.
'I’m gonna switch’
He nods but looks worried so I scribble out a second one with now great difficulty.
‘Don’t be scared, it’s fine’
“Wha- who- whats gonna happen”
‘You’re gonna meet Party Poison!’
I shoot him a bit of a goodbye smile, vaguely aware of the teacher calling us back into the classroom before surrendering and letting myself slip away, relieved.
I am so freaking relieved to have told frank. I’m so happy he doesn’t hate me. I do wonder if he has an ulterior motive, I wasn’t expecting him to be so cool with it. I mean how do I know I can trust him? He could easily tell the whole school. This could also easily be a trick. G comforts me reminding me that deep down I know my worries are illogical. It’s quite an odd day, very noisy. I don’t pay much attention in art, just drawing without thinking and listening to everyone talking. G and Party are chatting to eachother and Saviour keeps talking to me, it’s quite distracting. I don’t even know what they on about but their voices are still comforting despite everything.
“Come on!” Frank calls. It’s the end of the lesson. I’m irritated by the lack of productivity, it’s my favourite subject and I need to do well in it but the guys aren’t exactly making concentrating easy. I really want to go to art school but everything thinks I have no future because I don’t talk. I mean it’s most likely true but a picture speaks a thousand words and all that. It’s just annoying because if I wanna get anywhere I have to motivate myself because everyone else seems to write me off. The schools meant to be the ones educating and encouraging me. If anything school, both the teachers and pupils put me down. But I’ll get my revenge. Okay I’m not gonna be chopping their heads off or anything like that. That doesn’t mean to say hypothetically I wouldn’t enjoy it though. I’ll just show them later, I’ll laugh as they serve me McDonalds while I’m heading off to go and pick up my latest Eisner award. G got one of those apparently.
We have English second. We have a supply teacher who just sticks on a movie but she’s one of those strict supplies. They are a rare beast but they’re normally dickheads. Like this woman is head of the English department and doesn’t normally teach so she simply presses a play button but yells every time someone moves slightly. And Frank and I are made to sit right in front of her so I can’t even write him notes. In situations like this however being apparently a complete nutter is handy because I just chat to the guys. Party and G are discussing comics and I decide to join in.
‘G, can we make a joint comic together sometime?’ I ask ‘Just me and G’. I have a lot of love for G, he’s like an uncle, he’s full of love and positivity and always makes me smile. He’s like a parent figure almost, normally the one to bring some common sense to us all. But also the one who makes me giggle until my stomach physically hurts. I wish he would get to know the outside world though. I know Frank and him would get on like a house on fire.
‘Yes!’ He replies ‘Maybe we could base a character off of your little crush’
‘G!!’ I cry ‘But yes please’
We get lost in conversation about this idea, discussing his aesthetic and characteristics. Party interjects from time to time but respects the fact G and I are having some time to ourselves. It’s quite nice.
The film stops and it’s the end of the lesson. Frank and I pack up and head to break.
“I really appreciate you telling me about all your uh alters” He tells me.
I smile back in response and we head outside. I wonder about whether to invite Frank round mine. I feel so comfortable in his presence I don’t really want to say bye to him especially after what I told him. I’ve only known him for a day what is wrong with me.
‘Love’ party pipes up.
‘What? I don’t love him okay I fancy him a bit but I don’t know him well enough to be in love’ I explain
'Yeah but the brain chemicals have clicked now ya know there’s no denying it, now your goal is to get to know about him so you can 'love’ him. And hopefully you’ll achieve that by inviting him round’ They tell me.
'Okay okay’ Party’s right. As fucking always.
Once we sit down I text my mum. The conversation goes exactly how I expect.
Me: I haven’t asked him yet but am I allowed to bring someone round tonight?
Seconds later I get a reply.
Mum: Yes!! Gerard, I’m so glad to see you making friends!
Me: Thanks :)
'Fuck yes’Party squeals.
I can’t be bothered to get my sketchpad out my bag so I just text frank instead. Plus, I’m not liking how many pages I’m filling up lately.
Me:Do you wanna come round mine afterschool?
“Would that be okay?” Frank asks, reading my text.
Me:Yes! I just asked my mum
“Sure” he smiles. Party squeals for the second time. “You okay?” he asks.
Me: Yeah fine?“You seem distracted?”
Me: That’d be the 3 people having discussions in my head
'If you want us to be quiet we will’ Saviour tells me while I type.
'Its okay I like it really’I reply.
“That must feel really weird” frank comments
Me: I’d think it feels really weird having only one of you. Like doesn’t it get lonely?? What if you get hurt?? Do you just have to deal with it??
“Well yeah I guess. I mean your thing sounds like it could be really good in some situations like could you go out and do loadsa fun and reckless stuff then just hide away and let one of the other ones deal with the consequences”
'ahem party?’I hear G tease.
Me: theoretically yes but that’s kinda dickish. Like party used to do that a bit and I was normally left to pick up the pieces. But it would affect us all in the all in the end and we kinda just silently agreed to not do that kinda stuff
Suddenly the bell rings and we have to go to our next lesson. DT. To my dismay I realise Frank and I are in different groups, he’s doing graphic design, I’m doing resistant materials. The lesson goes quickly, it is one of the most enjoyable, I just wish Frank was here too. I feel oddly lost without him which is worrying. I shouldn’t be this dependant on an almost stranger. Everyone’s being really loud but I try and block it out and focus on the work. We’re making keychains, completely from scratch, we’re melting the metal and everything ourselves which is awesome if pretty scary. I think I’m going to give mine to frank.
'Hey!’party cries'not gonna give anything to your best friend?’
'Do you not remember how many flower crowns and feather boas I bought for you at Christmas?’ I giggle
'Yes very appropriate for the festive occasion’they tease.
'Don’t pretend like you didn’t love it’
After a few minutes, G joins our discussion. We chat about all the comics we got him and he rambles about how his are coming along, it’s all he ever talks about these days. I withdraw myself from the conversation but they keep talking and it’s kinda getting on my nerves. By lunchtime it’s incredibly noisy, party and G are debating something, I don’t bother trying to work out what. It’s not angry or anything it’s just passionate in an almost positive way. But it’s really distracting and I wish they’d just give it a rest or chat where I can’t hear. Frank and I eat lunch and he talks to me every now and then. I nod and listen to him talk about tattoos I think but I don’t really pay much attention, which I feel guilty for. The combination of the buzz of the canteen, my thoughts, Frank’s rambling and the other’s chatting makes it hard to focus on any one thing.
We have music last lesson which is awesome. Frank and I work in pairs to create a piece to perform. I get to play the xylophone while he plays guitar. He’s incredibly talented but Party and G ruin the moment, they talk all the way through so I can barely hear it. Throughout the lesson the external and internal noise increases.
“Are you okay?” Frank asks, a tone of concern in his voice. I shake my head “What’s wrong?” I grab a bit of paper next to us.
'Nothing it’s just everyone’s really loud, they’re normally quite quiet, I hardly payed any attention to your guitar playing because they were talking right over it’ I write.
'Can you make them be quiet’I whisper to saviour, hoping for a response.
'Yes of course’He smiles before yelling 'G! Party! Shut the hell up!’
I flinch at the shout but relish in the moment of stunned silence. It doesn’t last long because soon G and Party erupt with 'It’s not fair’s and 'But we weren’t even loud’s. It fades out pretty quickly though and although I can still hear them, it’s less intense and I can focus a bit now. I watch frank’s fingers dance over the guitar’s fretboard and I realise how amazing he actually is. It blows my mind.
“Do you want me to play you a song quickly?” He asks.
I nod excitedly. I watch him as he prepares himself for a moment. It’s so cliché but he really does have gorgeous eyes, they are big and full of emotion, a golden hazel colour. He seems more relaxed now than he has been so far, he’s clearly in his zone when he plays. Softly he picks at the strings and after a few moments begins to sing quietly. His voice is hypnotic, expressive but with a hint of vulnerability. It has an interesting tone to it, like nothing I’ve heard before. As the song goes on he gets more and more into it, strumming like it’s the most natural thing in the world and singing without a care. Once he’s done I can’t do anything other than grin up at him like a Cheshire cat.
“Was I any good?” He asks
'Fucking incredible’ I write on a scrap of paper.
“Anyway we’ve wasted half the lesson, we should probably get on with the task”
I nod in agreement and listen as he explains some of his ideas. I love writing music but I don’t know much of the technical things like Frank does so I let him take the lead. After all, I’m the one on the xylophone. Having said that, the xylophone is quite fun to play. That combined with Franks guitars makes me wonder if we should start a twenty one pilots tribute act. I find myself quite relaxed, enjoying the lesson. However, the more sucked in I get the more I feel Party pushing, wanting out. They love music much more than me and are full of ideas. After a while, I catch myself letting go slightly before forcing myself into staying in control a few times. I struggle to focus on the grand total of 3 notes I have to play, tripping up and zoning out. I scribble out a note to frank.
'I’m gonna switch’
He nods but looks worried so I scribble out a second one with now great difficulty.
‘Don’t be scared, it’s fine’
“Wha- who- whats gonna happen”
‘You’re gonna meet Party Poison!’
I shoot him a bit of a goodbye smile, vaguely aware of the teacher calling us back into the classroom before surrendering and letting myself slip away, relieved.
Notes
Wow I've been good w updating
don't expect this to last long though my life is p hectic atm
Its also 7:22am ive not slept n im going to a gig tonight
o well
Hope u r all having a wonderful day <3
Megan (honestly i cba to link my social media rn)
@boy_division
omg that's so cool wow setting the bar low lmao but yess omg I met them again exactly a week later and died so hard
11/20/15