I Think I Like It

He stared at me for a moment, his lips parted in shock and, fuck, sadness. He was so, so sad. I could tell from the way his eyes darkened, and the box slipped from his fingertips onto the ground.
Neither of us tried to catch it.
“No?” he asked, as if he hadn’t heard it properly. I shrugged.
“No. I’m not going to marry you.” I said firmly. It killed me to say, but it had to be said. I couldn’t possibly say yes to him – not now.
“W-why? I thought… I thought you wanted this.” He whispered. I could almost hear the heartbreak in his voice, and it made my heart squeeze. I shrugged, wiping my hands on my jeans.
“I do want it. I mean, I want you. I’ll always want you.”
“Then why did you say no?” he murmured. I sighed, tilting his head up so he was looking into my eyes, pretending not to see the tear that slid down his cheek. I knew I was killing him. Hell, it was killing me, too.
“Because you don’t want this, Gerard. You were so against it before, and now you’ve just magically changed your mind? It doesn’t make sense. And I refuse to marry you because you ask me out of pity.” I said, only a little bitterly.
“Besides” I added “what kind of asshole doesn’t speak to me for almost a month, and then proposes? I’m still mad at you.” I said, though I wasn’t really. Not entirely, anyway.
He shrugged softly.
“I do want to. I was scared.”
“And I can’t risk you being scared again. At least this way, there’s less damage if you try and run away again.”
“But I won’t!” he insisted, holding both my hands in his. I shrugged.
“I can’t risk it. I can’t have us getting engaged, and then you breaking it off because-“
“And you think I’d do that?” He sniffed, clearly offended. I sighed, running a hand through my hair.
“Yes, Gerard. I think that’s exactly like something you’d do. I love you, baby. I love you so much. But you were gone for a whole month, and I had no idea if we were even still together, and then you just…you ask me this? I can’t say yes to that. I need time.”
“How much time?”
“I don’t know. You hurt me, Gee.” I sighed. He took my hand in his and brought it to his lips, and I had to admit that it felt good to feel his lips brush against my skin.
“I won’t do that again, Frankie. I won’t hurt you ever again. Unless you ask me to.” He teased.
I smiled softly at the attempt at a joke.
“But you will, Gee. And I’ll hurt you. We’re going to hurt each other, over and over and over. Are you sure you want to live with that?” I asked. He scooped me up into his arms, pressing a kiss to my forehead.
“Yes. I want to live with that, and you, and everything. I don’t care if you leave me and cheat on me a million times, I just want you. You can’t get rid of me.” He said with a gentle grin. I shook my head at him, laughing.
“I probably couldn’t cheat on you a million times. I think…doesn’t your dick like, fall off when that happens?”
He grinned, shaking his head.
He leaned forward and kissed me softly, and I sighed, leaning into him. He felt good – he always felt good.
A hand started combing softly through my hair, and I tightened my arms around his neck, drawing him closer to me, but it wasn’t close enough.
“Frankie, I love you-“
“I love you too.” I replied. He smiled.
“I love you. But we so aren’t making out on my Grandmother’s grave.” He said, his eyes shining with amusement.
I smiled softly, tracing patterns on the back of his hand with my fingertips.
“No, you’re right. We should make out in your car. Or at your house.” I suggested, wiggling my eyebrows. He shrugged.
“I have a better idea, actually.” He said, rising to his feet. He held a hand out to me and I grabbed it, letting him haul me up.
“Yeah? And what’s that?” I giggled. He looked at me for a moment, with an expression so fond and gentle that it almost made me uncomfortable.
“Frank Iero. I’m taking you on a date.” He said firmly, leaving no room for negotiation. I grinned and laughed.
“A date, Gerard? Seriously?” I snickered. He looked almost hurt, but kept his smile in place.
“Yes. A date. Because I love you, and I missed you, and you deserve it.” He said simply, leaning down and grabbing the ring box from the floor, shoving it into his pocket.
I hated the way I was sad to see it go.
“Okay. A date. What exactly does that entail?” I asked, tilting my head, unable to keep the smile off my face. He shrugged and gestured widely with his hands.
“I don’t know. Dinner, a movie. What do people do on dates?” He asked, his eyes wide with genuine interest. I laughed and took his hand.
“Haven’t you been on a date before?” I teased – not that I had, either. He bit his lip and shot me a coy smile.
“I don’t normally make it that far.” He purred. I nudged him with my hip.
“Fine. Dinner and a movie sounds absolutely fine.” I assured him.
“And I’m paying.” He insisted. I snorted.
“Well, I’m sure as hell not.” I laughed. He rolled his eyes and moved to put his arm around my waist.
“But maybe I’ll let you take advantage of me afterwards.” I said suggestively. He laughed loudly – probably too loudly for a graveyard, in retrospect.
“Deal.” He grinned.

After a mild argument over where we were going for dinner (“No, Frank, McDonalds is not a date location”), we eventually decided on a restaurant that was in the mall – one of those ones that everybody walks past, but you never think to go into.
I was, however, on this occasion, quite glad that we did go into it. It was beautiful, and I almost considered asking Gerard if we could leave, because the dark red velvet seats and the marble floor signified to me that this was far too expensive – especially considering that he no longer had a job – but the wide, excited grin on his face deterred me.
The host looked at our joined hands, and then at Gerard. He glared at him accusingly for only a moment when he greeted us, leading us – almost resentfully, or so it seemed – to our table.
We sat down, and I immediately grabbed the menu and scanned down it.
It was, as expected, far too expensive.
“We should have gone to McDonalds.” I murmured, giving Gerard a smile. He rolled his eyes and nudged my leg under the table.
“Shut up.” He said with a grin. I could almost feel the excitement rolling off him, so I left it, looking at him instead of the menu.
He looked beautiful. Exhausted, but beautiful. The hazel eyes I’d grown to love were framed by dark rings, and his mouth was chapped and split from – I guessed – him biting it. I sighed and he looked up at me, tilting his head concernedly. I reached over and held his hand.
“You look like hell.” I whispered. He let his smile drop for a moment, revealing how haggard he really felt.
“I fell like hell.” He admitted with a weak smile that didn’t touch his eyes.
“I missed you.” I breathed. He pressed his lips together and opened his lips to speak, then closed them again.
“Gerard. I missed you. I love you.” I whispered, holding his hand harder. He took a deep breath.
“Gonna make me cry.” He laughed weakly. I frowned.
“Baby, maybe we shouldn’t-“
“I want to.” He said firmly. I sighed and leaned back, smiling fondly at him.
“You’re so stubborn.” I remarked. He only had time to shrug before the waiter appeared and we ordered.
It felt weird to be doing this with him. Sure, we’d gone for dinner before, but it had been out of town, and away from anyone who we might know. There was, before, no way anyone could have spotted us. That guarantee wasn’t there anymore, and I found it almost exciting.
“Frank.” Gerard said. I turned towards him and smiled.
“Yes?”
“I’m in love with you.” He said simply.
“So I’ve heard.” I retorted, raising an eyebrow. He bit his lip and leaned forward.
“I love you. And I’d quite like to fuck you.”
“Gerard.” I hissed, but I couldn’t help but grin. He leaned back and shrugged innocently as our food was put down in front of us.
“Sorry it’s not McDonalds.” He teased, gesturing to my burger. I sighed dramatically.
“I’ll live, I suppose.” I smiled as I bit into it. He watched me eat, ignoring his own dinner, and I swallowed self-consciously.
“Shit, Gee.” I laughed.
“Your mouth is beautiful. It’s the first thing I noticed about you. Your pretty lips.” He said, raising his hand slightly like he was going to touch me, then dropped it back onto the table. I ran my tongue along my bottom lip and let my teeth catch on it lightly.
“Really?”
“Say my name.” He whispered, watching my lips intently. I breathed a laugh.
“Why?”
“Because I want you to. Please.” He asked, still staring at me.
“Gerard.” I said softly. He pressed his lips together and nodded, looking almost relieved.
“Beautiful.” He breathed. I glanced up at him and shook my head incredulously before turning back to my food, and was relieved when he did the same.
We ate in a comfortable silence, his foot running up and down my ankle almost unconsciously, his eyes occasionally flickering up to mine, just watching me. Normally I’d have been perhaps a little put off by this, but I knew what he wanted, and I let him have it. I’d never thought, in my whole life, that I’d ever have anyone who wanted, more than anything, to look at my mouth. It was motivating. It made me want every word that slipped out of these lips to be beautiful, so maybe I could prove that I really was even half of what he thought I was.
It occurred to me, as he finished his dinner and leaned back, grinning softly to himself, that perhaps he was watching my lips in case he missed the eventual ‘yes’ that slipped through them.
The thought was both attractive and heartbreaking.

Unlike dinner, there was no dispute over the movie we were going to see. There was a horror movie – albeit, one we both suspected would be awful – that was playing, and Gerard didn’t even need to ask if it was the one I wanted to see. I thought that, at some point, we may have had the first two movies in the trilogy playing while we made love, and I could perhaps recall some of the plot. Not that that even mattered, of course, because Gerard – with suspiciously wide, innocent eyes – chose the back row of the theatre for us to sit in.
“Why, Gerard. I hope you didn’t take my offer of taking advantage of me too seriously.” I said mockingly. He responded by giving my ass a playful slap and wiggling his eyebrows.
“Would I ever do that?” he asked, leading me to my seat. I sat down and snorted.
“Uh. Yes.” I said without hesitation. He leaned forward and kissed me delicately, his fingertips running along my cheekbone.
“Later, my darling.” He breathed, smiling at me.
“I want you.” I whispered. He kissed along my jaw, his hand gripping my thigh.
“In what way?”
“Every way.” I answered. He chuckled as he moved his kisses down to my throat.
There was only one thing that could have destroyed the moment. Only one thing in the entire world.
And of course, it happened.
“Holy Shit.” Came a familiar voice from next to us. Gerard squeezed his eyes shut.
“Shit” he breathed. I turned my head and smiled at Jasmine and Anna, who were staring at us in horror. Anna’s brother, Bob, was standing next to her, smirking. I could almost feel Gerard blushing.
“Oh my god, I knew they were fucking.” Jasmine gaped. Gerard groaned and sat up, giving them a halfhearted wave.
“Hi girls.” He mumbled. I bit my lip, not sure if I wanted to laugh or cry.
“What, Gee? No hi for me?” Bob sneered. Gerard looked pointedly away from him.
“Bob.” He muttered.
“Aw, come on baby. That’s not how you said my name when you-“
“Shit, Bob, stop!” Anna shrieked, covering her ears, looking slightly overwhelmed. I couldn’t say I felt much sympathy.
“So, you’re fucking the little twink?” Bob said, gesturing to me. Jasmine rolled her eyes.
“Nobody’s really surprised. Especially not after prom.” She sneered.
“Yeah, Frank. What the fuck? Way to beg for attention.” Anna added spitefully. I felt my cheeks heat up, and Gerard held my hand.
“In all respect, Anna. I don’t think it was attention he was begging for.” Gerard purred. I widened my eyes and looked at him in shock. That was risky, even for him.
“Yeah, it was your dick.” She hissed. Gerard laughed, running a hand through his hair.
“Yes. It was.” He said simply. She looked quite taken aback, staring at him with wide eyes.
“Whatever. You know that this is illegal, right?” She sniffed.
“Uh, no. It’s not, actually.” I pointed out. Gerard shot me a proud smile.
“I bet he’s not much of a fuck.” Bob grunted. Gerard arched an eyebrow and held my thigh possessively.
“Not that it’s any of your business.” He said firmly
“But he’s the best I’ve ever had.” He purred, stroking the inside of my thigh.
The looks on their faces would have been almost comical if it wasn’t so awkward. There was a few muttered words of disapproval as they walked away, to the row next to ours.
It was an opportunity, I’ll grant that, and certainly one that Gerard didn’t intend on missing.
He moaned – maybe a little too loudly – and grabbed my face, kissing me deeply. I couldn’t help the whimper that escaped my lips as I held him tightly, feeling his hands move into my hair. I slipped my tongue into his mouth, and was almost shocked when he pushed away from me, panting.
“Baby, what-“
“I don’t want this.” He murmured. I tilted my head.
“What?”
“I just want to watch a movie with you, okay? Like normal people who aren’t sluts.” He said weakly, biting his lip. I sighed.
“You know I didn’t mean what I said, right? About you only being good for sex.”
“Didn’t you?” he asked softly. His eyes were wide and hopeful, and it made my heart squeeze.
“Oh, baby. No, of course not. You’re everything, Gerard.” I said, stroking his cheek. He held my hand to his face and smiled.
“But I’m good at sex too, right?” He asked as the lights dimmed. I kissed his cheek.
“The best. The very best.” I assured him, holding his hand as the movie started.

The movie itself was, as a whole, not great, but I guess we expected that. We watched it anyway, happy to be in each other’s company. I rested my head on his chest, and he rested his cheek on my head, stroking his fingers delicately down my spine. I felt that if he could have told me he loved me a million times, that he would have, and I would have replied with “I love you too”, every single time.
Instead, he just pressed kisses to my head, and to the tops of my ears, nibbling on them playfully, until I squeezed his thigh to make him stop.
His arms were tight around me, and I could hear his heart thumping under my head. I turned to kiss his chest, nuzzling into him as the audience jumped and screamed collectively at the poor attempt at horror.
I felt Gerard laugh, and couldn’t help but smile up at him. He was all I could ever want.
I sighed happily and kissed his throat, feeling his hand tighten on my hip.
“I love you.” I breathed against his skin. I didn’t know if he heard me or not, but his hand resumed rubbing my hip gently, and I felt him swallow hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing against my lips. I smiled, kissing him again.
“Watch the movie, idiot.” He chuckled softly, leaning down to kiss my head. I sighed and turned my attention back to the screen, but my eyes were soon drawn back to his face. The colours projected onto his face from the screen made his face even more beautiful, were such a thing even possible. He licked his lips and blinked a couple times, and I could have sworn that it made the Earth shake.
If he’d asked me to marry him, in that moment, I think it would have been impossible for me to say no.
“Stop looking at me.” He said, turning to me. I bit my lip.
“Can’t. I love you too much.” I said. He ducked his head and kissed me softly, his hand cupping my jaw. I stretched out and wrapped my arms around his neck, accepting the kiss happily. The audience jumped suddenly, and Gerard gasped, jerking away. He grinned, shaking his head.
“Wrong time.” He mouthed, taking my hand. I had to agree, and rested my head on his arm and trying to watch the movie, reasoning with myself that I’d have all night to stare at him adoringly.
Still, I managed to sneak in a couple glances at his face, which he pretended not to notice.

There was no question about what we were going to do next. I wasn’t horny, per se, but I was desperate for him. That wasn’t necessarily surprising, though – I was always desperate for him.
He barely had shut the front door when he started fumbling with his belt, cursing when it got stuck through one of the loops.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” Mikey said, and I spun around to see him looking at us in disgust. Gerard – having managed to get his belt undone – held his pants up, smiling sheepishly.
“Uh, hey Mikes.” He said weakly. Mikey sighed.
“Hi, guys. Wow, glad you had a nice day.” He muttered. I couldn’t help but laugh at the panicked look on Gerard’s face.
“Uhm…we were just…”
“He said yes?” Mikey asked, eyes flickering to me. I blushed.
“Uh, no. He…he said no.” Gerard murmured. Confusion crossed Mikey’s face, but he brushed it off.
“Whatever. Keep it down.” He snapped, turning for the stairs.
We waited until he had slammed his bedroom door shut, before Gerard was on me again, kissing me urgently and letting his pants and underwear fall to the floor in a pool at his feet, kicking them off and away unceremoniously. I couldn’t help but smile against his mouth as I tugged my own jeans and boxers off, throwing them next to his, before grabbing his shirt, ripping it open.
He raised an eyebrow at me.
“You broke my buttons.” He teased as he threw both of our shirts onto the floor.
“I don’t care.” I replied, grabbing his hips and pulling him closer to me. He pushed me down onto the sofa, growling softly, and claimed my neck with his lips and teeth. I gasped and arched up into him, wrapping my arms around his neck. He gave my ass a loud slap, and I hissed.
“Stop being such a bitch.” He purred as he spat on his fingers and pressed them against my ass. I moaned and arched up again, pushing my ass down onto his fingers and whimpering as they started to slide into me.
“You’ve been fingering yourself, haven’t you, Frankie?” he murmured. I nodded.
“Pretended it was you.” I admitted weakly. Gerard beamed, kissing me roughly.
“I’m gonna buy you a dildo, okay? Gonna get you one the same size as my cock, and then you can pretend I’m fucking you when I’m not there.” He murmured, pressing chaste kisses to my lips as his fingers filled my ass up. I whined and tried to wiggle back onto his fingers.
“Promise?” I breathed. He nodded.
“Yeah, baby. I promise. “ he murmured against my mouth, sliding his fingers out of me and holding my ass open. He moved back, smirking as he spat on his hand and ran it down his cock, moaning softly.
“That’s disgusting.” I pointed out. He rolled his eyes and moved back so his cock bounced against my ass.
“Do you want me to fuck you or not?” he purred. I bit my lip and nodded, pushing my legs even further apart.
“I do. Fuck me. Please fuck me.” I chanted. He pushed my legs up by my chest as he slid into me, letting out a harsh breath.
“Fuck.” He moaned. I felt my ass stretch around him and whimpered in slight discomfort, but it faded into a drawn out moan as he bottomed out.
“Your ass just stretches around my cock, Frankie. It’s so hot.” He smiled, leaning down to kiss my chest. He flicked his tongue against my nipple and I cried out, arching my back as he licked it slowly, starting to thrust his hips into me. I whined, rolling my head back, my mouth falling open.
“Don’t open your mouth unless you want me to put my dick in it.” He teased, giving my ass another sharp slap. I pressed my lips together obediently, digging my fingers into his ass.
“Can I try something?” I whispered hoarsely. He nodded, not slowing down his hips – and honestly, I was grateful. I’d have probably cried if he stopped.
I sucked my fingers into my mouth, staring up at him with wide eyes, before moving them back towards his ass, pushing my fingers against his hole.
His eyes snapped open, his hips faltering slightly.
“Fuck. I didn’t think you meant that.” He moaned. I pulled my hand away.
“Do you want me to stop?” I whispered.
“No. Fuck. Don’t stop.” He gasped, grabbing my hips as he started to fuck into me again. It took me a few moments to compose myself to start pushing against his ass again, moaning as I felt my fingers slide into him.
“Oh fuck. Oh fuck. So good.” He moaned, burying his face in my shoulder as he pounded into me, each thrust of his hips causing my fingers to go deeper into him.
The angle was awkward, and I couldn’t get in very deep, but I could tell that he was enjoying it.
“Fuck!” He cried, grabbing my cock and jerking me off at the same pace as his thrusts. My mouth fell open despite myself, and my eyes rolled back in my head. The pleasure was almost overwhelming.
“Can we switch?” he panted. I froze, eyes wide.
“You mean, you…”
“Fuck me. Fuck me.” He whined, rolling his hips forward desperately. I nodded and pulled my fingers out of his ass, wiping them inconspicuously on the sofa. He slid out of me, and I couldn’t help but moan at the loss. He shot a grin at me as he turned away from me on his hands and knees, looking hopefully at me over his shoulder. Feeling dazed, I moved behind him, rubbing my cock against his ass.
“Daddy…” he whined, dropping his head down. I took the opportunity to smack his ass sharply, enjoying the loud noise it made, and his accompanying hiss.
“Fuck me, Frank.” He moaned, wiggling his ass back and rubbing it against my cock. I moaned, unable to hesitate any longer, and pushed my cock into him, gasping as I filled him up.
He moaned, dropping his head down again.
“Yeah…fuck…”
“You’re such a bottom.” I teased, reaching over him to grab his hair, holding his head up. He smiled vaguely, panting hard.
“I know, daddy.” He whispered. I moaned and grabbed his ass with my free hand, and started pounding into him, as he had been only moments before, letting out a loud moan.
I watched as he moved his hand between his legs to jerk himself off, whimpering as he bit down on his lip.
“Gonna cum Gee. Fuck.” I whispered, tugging his hair back, exposing his throat.
“Cum on me.” He begged, pushing himself back onto my cock.
He was such a slut. His mouth hung open, his eyes rolling back into his head. His hand worked furiously on his cock.
It was, more than anything, his desperation that ended up pushing me over the edge. I cried out as my cock throbbed, managing to pull out just in time to cum on his ass, my head falling back as it dripped down his legs.
“Fuck. Fuck.” He whispered, hand still working along his cock. I still gripped his hair tightly, holding his head back.
“Cum you fucking whore.” I spat. He let out a high pitched whine as he squeezed his cock and, almost on command, came hard, splattering his already soaked thighs in his cum. I let go of his hair and fell back, watching as he collapsed onto the sofa, the blanket that hung over its back tangling up in his wet legs. He panted, looking up at the ceiling.
“C’mere.” He whispered, holding his arms out to me. I obliged, crawling over to him and letting him hold me tightly. He kissed my forehead.
“I love you so much.” He whispered. I smiled up at him, leaning up slightly to kiss his jaw.
“I love you too, Gee.” I murmured, nuzzling against his throat.
We sat like that for a few moments, sweaty and smelling like sex, in complete silence. The only sound was the heartbeat under my head, and his gentle breaths.
If there was a moment where I loved him more than other moments, it was this. Just after sex. The moment where the animalistic desire and need is gone, and all there is, is him and I. Naked, vulnerable, and wrapped entirely in each other – like nothing else in the universe could ever matter.
“Marry me, Frank.” He whispered, combing my hair back from my forehead. I looked up at him, and saw sweat beading down the side of his face. I kissed his throat.
“Hm?” I murmured, as if I hadn’t understood him. He let out a light laugh.
“I meant what I said. I’m not afraid, Frankie. I want to be yours, and for you to be mine. Always. Tell me you don’t want this. Me. Forever.” He whispered.
“I do want this.” I admitted. I could have cried – I wanted him so badly.
“Then marry me.”
“Is that an order?” I teased.
“No, it’s not. It’s me stepping away from everything I’ve ever thought, and the morals I’ve always lived by. It’s me peeling off everything, and handing myself to you completely. It’s me literally handing you my heart. Frank, please. Marry me, babe.”
I leaned up on my arm and brushed the tears that formed away from his eyes, kissing his forehead, and resting my head against his. He sighed and hummed lightly, holding me close to him like he had a million times before, and it felt like it really had been a million times – maybe more. It felt like the universe was created, and would end, with me in his arms.
Now, just like before, in the graveyard, I knew exactly what my answer was going to be. I felt it in every inch of my soul, with no room in me for doubt, and with absolute clarity and confidence.
“Yes. Of course I’ll marry you, Gerard.” I whispered.
He gasped and jerked up so fast I almost fell off of him – and perhaps I would have, if he didn’t reach out and grab me.
“You….you…honestly?” He whispered, tears forming in his eyes.
“Yes. Fuck, oh my god. Yes.” I said, beaming. He grabbed my face and kissed me hard.
“Just…fuck…wait…” he stammered, getting up and leaving the room for a moment. I took that time to consider if I’d made the right choice, and every inch of me sung out that I had.
He returned with the ring box and handed it to me, but I shook my head.
“Put it on me.” I said, my voice shaking. He stared at me in awe and kissed me again, before fumbling with the ring for a moment, and finally sliding it onto my finger. It was perfect.
He was perfect.
“Oh my…Oh my God. We’re getting married.” He whispered, putting a hand over his mouth. My eyes were filled with tears as I nodded, reaching forward to kiss him.
“I’m gonna be yours forever.” I whispered, running my hands through his hair. He smiled against my mouth and pulled back, raising an eyebrow.
“You know what this means, right?” He asked.
“What?” I asked giggling softly. His next words, however, wiped the smile from my face completely.
“We have to tell your Mother.”

Notes

Sorry! Sorry!
I'm back, my lovelies! I'm done with school so I should be all good to start posting regularly again.
I hope this one makes up for my absence!