Don’t get to close it’s dark inside.
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Trigger warning
Frank’s POV
Gerard has been with us for nearly a month now and he hardly speaks still and is always on edge and pretty much stays in his room.
“Its just strange that he never leaves his room and he never speaks.” Arya said as we walked home from school.
“Think he’s just scared of you because he talks to me and he talks to mum and dad.” I said and Arya sighed loudly.
“I’m not that bloody scary.” Arya said as we walked up the street to our house.
“You are a bitch towards him and being blunt with him is not how you interact with him. Also being all closed with your body language doesn’t help him know that your not bad at all.” I said and Arya rolled her eyes.
“I am not a bitch towards him, he just needs to learn to stop being a sensitive little bitch about life.” Arya said and I pulled her back hard since we was nearly at home.
“We don’t have a clue what Gerard has been through and until he tells us or we understand what has happened to him you do not go around calling him a sensitive little bitch.” I said seriously and Arya just rolled her eyes and I just let her go and we walked the rest of the way home in silence.
When we got home I went upstairs to dump my stuff off in my room and I went to Gerard’s room and knocked on his door and opened it and I peered my head around the door and I couldn’t see Gerard which was strange even for Gerard since he always was in his room when we was all home and we literally had to encourage him to leave his room.
I heard someone run the stairs and I turned round and looked where I saw Arya looking worried.
“He’s downstairs covered in blood.” Arya said sounding scared and I walked over to her and caught hold of her and squeezed it.
“Go to your room and stay there and call either mum or dad.” I said and Arya nodded as she went to her room and I went downstairs to find Gerard in the kitchen collapsed on the floor and was covered in blood.
“Gerard.” I said as I walked over to him and knelt down and felt for a pulse and I found a really faint one.
“Shit, Arya I need you!” I shouted and I heard Arya come down the stairs.
“Don’t come in but I need you to look for old towels and call a ambulance.” I said.
“Mum said she’s went to the shops and that she’ll be here in 2 minutes.” Arya said and I nodded as I looked to see where this bleeding was coming from.
“Get the towels for me please.” I said and I heard Arya run out the room.
“What have you been doing Gee.” I said softly as I heard the front door slam shut and someone walking into the room.
“Shit, where is Arya?” Mum asked as I looked at her about to answer when Arya showed up and handed me the towels which I took and wrapped it round Gerard’s wrists and put some pressure on to them.
“Arya please leave the room.” Mum said calmly as she looked Gerard over and I looked at her and she had this look on her face.
“I’ve called a ambulance already. I’m in my room if you need it.” Arya said and mum looked at her and smiled.
“Thank you.” Mum said and Arya walked out the room and mum looked at me.
“Please tell me she wasn’t being mean to him.” Mum said quietly and I shook my head.
“No, Arya found him like this when we got home.” I said and mum nodded as someone walked into the house which made us look up and we saw a paramedic.
“Hey Finn.” The paramedic said since mum did work in A&E.
“Hey Charlie.” Mum said as the paramedic got to our level and looked Gerard over.
“He needs to go to hospital, these cuts are deep and he also needs to see the mental health services.” Charlie said and I looked at mum.
“I’ll see what is being said about him but I think this isn’t the place for this conversation.” Mum said and they loads Gerard up and took him out the house.
“You are in charge of your sister.” Mum said as she put her coat on and walked out of house and left us which made me sigh as I went to clean the mess on the floor.
I was busy sorting something out for dinner when someone came into the kitchen and I turned round to see Arya and dad standing in the doorway.
“Arya told me what happened to Gerard.” Dad said as he stood beside me.
“Shouldn’t you be talking to Arya since she was the one who found him on the floor.” I said quietly as I put some potatoes in the saucepan where dad put his hand on top of mine which made me stop what I was doing and I sighed quietly.
“Arya can you finish up here and I’ll be back to put this all on.” Dad said and Arya stood the other side of me and dad gently took hold of my arm and I followed him to the sitting room and I sat on the sofa and dad sat next to me.
“Talk to me buddy.” Dad said and I shook my head as I messed with the cushion.
“Don’t shut me out Frank, look I know your pretty much the only one Gerard will talk to and I know you like him as well.” Dad said and I sighed quietly.
“I don’t know dad, like I know this was expected but not this soon. I mean doesn’t he like here that he has to try and kill himself to get out of this.” I said and dad smiled softly at me.
“He does like it here, I know for a fact when your not here he’ll sit in your room and talk to those bloody rats of yours. We don’t understand what happened to him and I don’t think we will ever know or understand what happened to him. But he could surprise all of us and tell us. It’s just going to take time for Gerard to understand we’re not like those bastards he used to being with.” Dad said and I nodded slightly.
“Don’t take this to heart okay.” Dad said softly as he stood up and he went to the kitchen and I got up and went to my room and got the rats out and made a fuss of them until I called to have dinner.
———————————————————————————————————————
I decided that I wasn’t going to go to school but instead I was going to go and see Gerard in hospital as I hoped it’ll cheer him up a little.
I got to the hospital and went to the ward where Gerard was since Mum told us he was on the ward she worked on so I went there and straight away bumped into mum.
“Franklin what you doing here, you should be at school.” Mum said as she had a drink of water from the nurses station.
“I wanted to see if Gerard was okay.” I said and mum smiled.
“Gerard is okay, think he is a bit lost so hopefully you can cheer him up a little.” Mum said and I nodded as mum told me where Gerard was and I walked over to his room and knocked on the door and walked in the room.
“Hey Gee.” I said softly as I walked over to him and sat on the end of the bed which made Gerard move his legs towards his chest since he was sat up looking lost.
“How you feeling today? You gave us all a scare.” I said and Gerard looked down and messed with the blanket.
I wasn’t really expecting him to answer me but I was surprised when he did reply.
“Okay I guess, I just want to go home.” Gerard said quietly.
“Well it won’t be long until you are allowed to come home, you just have to see some people to see what is going to happen to you now.” I said and Gerard looked at me and he did look scared.
“They going to take me away?” Gerard said as he got out of the bed quickly which made all the wires and other stuff being pulled off or being pulled out.
“Gee, you have to calm down.” I said as I got off the bed and walked over to Gerard who was losing it.
“They going to take me way!” Gerard shouted and it shocked me as I never thought Gerard could even talk louder than a whisper.
“Nobody is going to take you away okay. You are safe now.” I said as I stood in front off Gerard and caught hold of his hands which made Gerard look at me.
“Everything is going to be okay, nobody is going to hurt you or take you away. You are now safe from harm.” I said softly and Gerard sniffed as a few tears rolled down his cheeks.
“People say that but it’s not true.” Gerard sobbed as he sniffed and looked down.
“I’m not like those people, neither are mum, dad or Arya. We love you okay and yes you have your quirks which make us frown at each other but we would never have you any other way.” I said and Gerard looked at me.
“I understand it is hard for you to trust anyone and that it takes you a long time to trust anyone but you can trust me, Mum, dad and Arya. We’re here for you.” I said and Gerard nodded as he sniffed.
“Let’s get your arm looked at as its bleeding.” I said and gently guided Gerard to the bed where he sat down and a nurse came over and sorted Gerard arm out.
I left Gerard alone with mum since I think she was about the only nurse who get near him and I went home to sort the house out.
———————————————————————————————————————
“I have an idea which could help Gerard.” Arya said as she walked into the sitting room holding her iPad where me and dad was sat watching tv.
“What might that be?” Dad asked since we pretty much exhausted all the options for helping Gerard so we could do with new ideas.
“Okay so we know Gee is completely fucked in the head after what happened, if he agrees to get a assessment done then we could get him a dog.” Arya said and we frowned at her.
“I don’t think your mother will allow that, you both are lucky to have the pets you have and with a dog running around I don’t think she would cope.” Dad said.
“No, not like your normal pet dog dumbass, a emotional support one. I’m sure if Gee had something to talk to which isn’t going to judge him. I mean I’ve heard him talk to Frank’s rats.” Arya said and I smiled slightly.
“Yeah I mean it sounds like a good idea but we need to get your mother on board with it and we need to get Gee to open up slightly to the professionals but at the moment he isn’t sharing anything and he’s just completely shut down.” Dad said and Arya sighed as she sat between us and I looked at her out the corner of my eye.
“Come on Frank please say you agree with this.” Arya said.
“Yeah I agree with it.” I said and Arya smiled at me.
“I know your hoping Frankie’s charm is going to work but I don’t think it’s going to work.” Arya said and I chuckled.
“Well he let me touch his hands yesterday so I think the charm is working.” I said as the front door opened.
“You need to work that charm on your mother the pair of you do if you want to do what you want to do.” Dad said as mum walked in the room with Gerard behind her.
“Hey Gee.” Arya said happily which made Gerard look at her confused since she has been a right bitch towards him.
Gerard just looked at me and I just shrugged my shoulders at him, you could see that he was thinking about hiding in his room but he looked down and took a deep breath as he walked over to the sofa and sat on the edge of the sofa and he clearly wasn’t used to this and he was really tense.
“Sit back and relax, you can sit here and you can also recline the sofa so your feet are up.” I said as I showed him which made Gerard jump at the force the footrest went up.
“The chair spins as well.” Arya said as she sat in the chair and spun herself around.
I chuckled as Gerard sat back on the sofa and he got himself comfy and tucked his legs up on the sofa.
“The ass groove is pretty big since that’s normally dads spot.” Arya said as dad walked into the room and just sat on her which made me chuckle and I saw Gerard have this very confused look on his face.
I was walking out the bathroom after having a shower with my shorts on when I stopped by Gerard’s room and I knocked on the door and opened it where Gerard was sat in the window with it wide open.
“It’s a bit cold to have your window wide open.” I said which made Gerard jump as he turned round and looked at me and he smiled slightly as I walked over and sat on the window sill.
“I’ve never had a window in my room before, I like the air on my skin.” Gerard said quietly as he looked out the window.
I looked at Gerard’s arms and legs since he was in shorts and a t shirt because this house was ridiculously hot at night for some reason.
“What are those?” I asked as I pointed to the tally tattoo on his thigh.
“The number of people who owned me.” Gerard whispered as he pulled his shorts over it a bit more.
“The scars round your ankles and wrists?” I asked carefully.
“Rather not talk about this, please leave me alone.” Gerard said quietly as he looked back out the window where I saw a few tears fall down his cheeks.
“You don’t have to fear them anymore Gee, you are free to talk about what happened to you.” I said maybe pushing him a little bit too much.
“You don’t understand and you will never understand, now leave me alone!” Gerard said starting off quietly but he shouted the last part at me.
“Okay, I’ll leave you alone. But if you need someone to talk to at all you know where my room is if you need to chat.” I said and Gerard just blanked me so I sighed and walked out his room where Arya was just walking up the stairs.
“Did I just hear Gerard shout at you?” Arya asked and I nodded.
“Yep you did.” I said which made Arya frown at me.
“You didn’t push him did you, Mum and dad said that we weren’t to ask questions about what we see.” Arya said and I sighed loudly.
“No I didn’t push him to answer questions.” I snapped and Arya rolled her eyes at me and went to her room and shut the door and I went downstairs and went outside for a cigarette.
I was sat in bed attempting to do some homework when my door opened and I looked up and saw Gerard with his duvet and he looked upset.
“Hey.” I said and Gerard sniffed as I moved over in bed and Gerard walked over and sat on my bed and looked at my homework.
“Did you have a nightmare?” I asked and he shook his head.
“Was it a flashback?” I asked and Gerard nodded as he moved his legs closer to his chest and hugged his knees.
“Can I sleep in here tonight? I don’t feel safe.” Gerard whispered and I smiled at him.
“Course you can.” I said and I got off the bed and went to Gerard’s room to get his mattress where it looked like he had sweated loads during this flashback.
I sighed quietly as I stripped his bed and quickly put some clean bed covers on and I dragged it to my room.
I walked into my room and Gerard was still looking really upset.
“I’ve brought your mattress in so you can sleep on that.” I said and Gerard nodded as he looked down and I walked back over to my bed and climbed into bed and looked at my homework which made me sigh.
“Do you want to do my homework for me.” I said and Gerard looked at me confused.
“What’s homework?” Gerard asked and I looked at him shocked.
“The stuff school make you do at home.” I explained briefly and Gerard still looked at me confused.
“You never been to school?” I asked and Gerard shook his head.
“So you can’t read or write?” I asked and again Gerard shook his head.
“Shit.” I said and Gerard looked down and messed with the covers.
After about 2 hours I was fed up with doing my homework so I loaded up Netflix on my Xbox and looked at Gerard.
“Come and sit up here, more comfortable than leaning against the wall and turning your head to watch tv.” I said as I moved over and Gerard gingerly shuffled over and sat next to me.
“What do you want to watch?” I asked and Gerard shrugged his shoulders.
“Nothing scary.” Gerard said quietly and I nodded and I found this show I’ve started to watch but I got bored of it.
“This is good, but then again I may fall asleep to it because it does get boring.” I said and Gerard nodded as I moved and got myself comfy and I watched this show before I fell asleep.
