I'll let you go

Chapter 2
Frank’s p.o.v


I drive through the foggy rain, getting frustrated with the rain. Cherry sits in the back, kicking her legs against the seat along to the green day song that’s playing. I pull into the parking lot of the stadium, parking close to the entrance. I get out quickly, helping Cherry out and grabbing my guitar case.
“Frankie, why are we here?” She asks, looking up quizzically at me.
“I don’t know honey. We’ll see.” I tell her, smiling down at her. I spot Bob smoking a cigarette at the entrance, his back to the wall. I approach him, my hand tight around Cherry’s.
“Hey Bob.” I say, snapping him out of his gaze. He grins at me, throwing his cigarette down and engulfing me in a hug.
“Hey man! Hey Cherry.” He greets us warmly, a smile on his pale pink lips.
“So...what are we doing here?” I ask awkwardly, biting my lip nervously. He opened the door, gesturing for me to go in. I honestly do, seeing a banner hanging in the room.
It says ‘Band audiences for My Chemical Romance.’ which makes me cringe a little. Not a healthy place for Cherry.
“Go on that stage.I’m going to get the other band members.” Bob states, rushing away. Before I can protest, he’s gone
.“Alright then. C’mon Cherry.” I say, walking to the huge stage. I don't know why they called this place ‘the stadium’. Probably because there’s not a better name for it. I take out my guitar and a song that I finished.
“Alright, sit by the amp Cherry.” I say, plugging in my guitar and sitting on a stool that's been placed on stage.
I strum around a little bit, getting my guitar in tune. Bob suddenly pops his head out of one of the rooms.
“Okay! Start playing!’ He shouts. I hear other footsteps, but I start to play after that. The song is called ‘Oceans’. I started to sing the words to it, as I played, my voice clear as day.

There's still a part of me that needs to look the same way into your eyes
The world may fall apart
I hate everything that waits outside my door but locked inside I'll be alright
Alright, alright, alright...
Honestly, I'm convinced the best of me is the worst of me
Believe me, I've tried but I just can't seem to fight
Against the tide and undertow that drags me down
So low beneath the foam I can't feel the sun burn my eyes
You're still a part of me, the only part I enjoy, and I wish I
I still had a hold on you like you do, until you're blue, around my throat
Things don't feel the same like they did back then but I, I don't mind
The past don't mean shit to me, shit to me, shit to me, shit to me...
(Now that's a lie)
Honestly, I'm convinced the best of me is the worst of me
Believe me, I've tried but I just can't seem to fight
Against the tide and undertow that drags me down
So low beneath the foam I can't feel the sun burn
I sank to the bottom
I sank to the bottom like a stone
Oh, the things I've done to me
Honestly, I'm convinced the best of me is the worst of me
Believe me, I've tried but I just can't seem to fight
Against the tide and undertow that drags me down
So low beneath the foam I can't feel the sun
I sank to the bottom
I sank to the bottom of the ocean like a stone
Wish I was good enough
I wish I was good enough
I've never been good enough for your love

I stop, hearing silence in the room. I stare down at my guitar, waiting for a reaction.
“Frankie! That was great!” Cherry says, popping up from her spot and running over to me. I swing my guitar over my shoulder and pick Cherry up.
“Thank you honey.” I murmur.
“Is this a fucking joke?!” I hear an angry voice ask. I snap my head up and find….Gerard, staring at me. Like he wanted to kill me. I gasp, staring at Bob.
“Bob! What the fuck, man?! You set me up!” I shout putting Cherry down. Bob shrugs a little, as if realising his mistake.
“Who the fuck cares right now?! Why the fuck are you in Believe?!” Gerard yells angrily. I cringe, hoping it wasn’t noticeable.
“I...moved here.” I say simply, scratching the back of my head.
“Why?!” Gerard yells at me, his hands thrown into the air.
“I didn’t think anyone still lived here, okay? I thought you guys would be far away, doing big things.” I say, staring over at Cherry. She runs over to me, hugging my legs.
“Frankie! Make him stop yelling, it’s scary!” She cries into my legs. I pick her up, whispering in her ear that it’s okay. I kiss her temple, setting her down again.
“Gerard, calm down.” I hear a soft voice say. I notice Mikey and Ray for the first time, Ray giving me a sympathetic smile. Mikey’s face is blank though, as usual. Not that I’d know anymore.
“Bob, why did you bring him here?” Gerard asks, a little calmer now.
“Because, Gerard, we need a guitarist.” Bob answers. Cherry’s head snaps up, studying Gerard.
“Wait! That’s Gerard?” She asks me, her voice loud. Before I can respond, she bounces off the stage, running to Gerard.
“Cherry! Stop it, come back here!”I yell. She reaches Gerard, throwing her arms around him. He looks at me, awkwardly picking her up. I get off the stage, walking to them fastly.
“Frankie said you used to hold me all the time! He said you were great and that you were the best person he ever knew and-”
“Cherry stop!” I shout, cutting her off. Everyone looks at me and I rub my face gently, trying to calm myself a little.
“Why did you tell her those things?” Gerard asks quietly. I snap my head up, looking at him with surprise.“What do you mean?” I ask, tilting my head.
“I mean, you left. Why did you leave if you thought those things?” He asks, his voice a little more forcive. I finch, looking over at Mikey.
“You never told him.” I say simply, staring at Mikey. He gives a slight nod, making me rub my forehead and sigh.
“I...I can’t explain.” I tell Gerard, looking at the ground.
“Oh bull shit! Don’t give me that ‘I had too’! I don’t believe you!” He yells again, his voice husky and angry.
“You know what Gerard? I did have too! I didn’t want to fuck up you life because mine was falling apart too. So yeah, I will give you that ‘I had too’ bullshit, because I did! You were gonna go far, Gerard, and I was dragging you down.” I snap, looking him dead in the eye. He looks at me blankly a second, then looks at Mikey.
“What does he mean?” Gerard asks quietly. I just stand there, staring at my hands, trying hard to disappear.
“Let him explain when he’s ready.” Mikey responds, making me look up at him. He smiles understandingly.
“He’s had four years.” Gerard growls. I look at him, staring at his angry face.
“I can’t do this,” I say, gesturing for Cherry to come to me. “Bob call me later.”
I begin to walk to the stage picking up my stuff. I feel they’re eyes on me as I finish. Just before I start to walk off the stage I kiss Cherrys head.
“I love you sweet heart.” I say to her, taking her hand and walking off the stage. I’m about to reach the doors when I hear a sound of protest.
“Just...please give me an explanation.” Gerard pleads. His voice is now soft, small and child like. I turn around, facing him. I sigh, looking away from him and at the stage.
“Linda died. A week before I left. I didn’t want to ruin your life by you having to raise a kid, Gerard. I didn’t want you to feel tied down because of it, I knew you’d be important some day, but not while you left you owed me something.” I say, looking anywhere but his face. He doesn’t speak, but I feel him staring.
“I….I’m sorry. Goodbye Gerard.” I start to turn away.
“Don’t say it like that.” Gerard mutters, looking at his hands.
“Like what?” I respond, staring at him confusedly.
“Like it’s the last time you’ll see me.” He explains, finally looking back up at me.
“It’s...it’s the good bye you never got before.” I say. I hear him whimper, before I realise what I said. A horrified look etched itself on my face, realising what i just said.
“Oh, God, I didn’t mean that, holy fuck I’m sorry.” I say, my voice panicked. “I’ll leave now, I’m sorry Gerard. This isn’t goodbye unless you want it to be.” I whispered, turning away and finally leaving. I walk hand in hand with Cherry, before a voice behind me stops me.
“Frank.” Mikeys says, making me turn around. I let out a shaky breathe, looking him straight in the eyes.
“Mikey.” I answer, my voice softer than his.
“I fucking missed you. I am not letting you go without my number.” Mikey states sternly, making me grin.
“I missed you too, Mikes.” I say, quickly getting out a pen I kept with me at all times. I step toward him, writing my number on his arm.
“Alright, I’ll call you later. See ya Frank.” Mikey says turning around. I begin to walk away too, before he stops me again.
“Oh, yeah, Frank?” He asks, making me look back at him.
“Yeah?” I respond.
“He still loves you.” Mikey says simply, opening the door and walking back in. My mouth drops, my head now a complete mess. I force myself to move, trying to shake the shock away.
Gerard couldn’t still love me. Not after what I put him through.
*
*
*
I hope somebody misses me when I'm gone.
I know it ain't right to want someone to cry,
I just hope you miss me when I'm gone.
I just wish I knew which way I was going.

I know I've loved you all my life.
I swear I've loved you all along.
From the first time I laid eyes, until the day I die,
I know I'll love you until the end of time.
If you cross my heart I'll hope to die.

Notes

Monster Inc band aids are nice.