I'm Not Okay (I Promise)
Mysterious
Oh, oh we need each other
Through all the highs and lows
Oh, oh we need each other
Cause no one’s meant to live alone
I sit in my car for almost an hour outside the Way house just waiting. Is Gerard coming? Obviously I made it evident I wanted him to follow me, didn’t I…perhaps not. Well I do, I want him here right now.
Just then the door opens and a boy dressed in a school uniform exits the house, pulling the passenger door open. It’s Gerard and he’s wearing that creepy smile.
“Sweet ride,” he comments not bothering to buckle up, he knows we’re not going anywhere.
“Thanks to the Bryar family,” I mumble lighting a fag and offering him one, he accepts. “You’ve seen this car before Gerard.”
“I know. I still like it. You know I can’t keep doing this,” Gerard announces, smoke coming out of his nostrils and mouth.
“Why not, there’s nothing wrong with what we’re doing. Tonight we aren’t even getting wasted.”
“Mikey,” Gerard answers. “You met him today didn’t you? Don’t think I didn’t see you at lunch, you where eying my little brother.”
I shrug, “He looked hurt, and I’m a compassionate person Gerard. I was worried for him.”
Gerard laughs, looking over at me, his hand slipping into his pocket, “Here –” he hands me a folded up piece of paper – “I drew it.”
I look down at the red eyed vampire standing over a girl, his hand on her shoulder, the caption, ‘Vampires will never hurt you,’ scribbled under it. Only Gerard is capable of drawing something like this. As completely beautiful and sinister and disturbing as the picture is I like it.
“Who’s the girl?” I question already knowing the answer.
“You just happened to be fresh on my mind,” he shrugs, going to take it back. I move it out of his reach.
“I want to keep this one.”
Gerard grimaces but gives up his attempts to get his drawing back. He knows how I am even if we do usually only hang out when we’re both fucked up.
“Gee, I have a –” I think of the right way to word this – “would you be interested in escorting me to Newark every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday?”
Gerard eyes me curiously, “Why are you going to Newark?”
“Well, I have this thing and Bob doesn’t like me going into the city alone. I just thought that...well maybe we’d be able to still hang out just not while doing "bad" things.”
I don’t want to lose Gerard as a friend and if Frank is going to start hanging out with the Ways it’ll be easier if I’m friends with them too. Besides both Gerard and I are trying to get clean. Maybe we could help each other out.
“Is he worried you’ll get hurt?”
I nod. It all sounds stupid and mysterious but in truth it’s simple. I don’t want to worry Bob and I think it’s in everyone’s best interest if Gerard lays off the booze for a little. Besides the thirty minute ride to Newark gets boring sometimes…now I’ll have someone to talk to.
Gerard shrugs, leaning closer, “I guess.”
“Really?”
“Sure, maybe I’ll bring along Mikey, he needs to get out of the house,” answers Gee still too close to me.
“Please don’t, I don’t want anyone to come but you.”
Gerard nods, fiddling with the window switch on his door, “You’re being all mysterious and shit. I kinda like it.”
I roll my eyes laughing a little, “Why are you such a creep?”
“I thought you liked creeps,” Gerard gasps. “Have I been doing this wrong the whole time?”
I laugh. Gerard isn’t half bad when he lets his guard down and acts like himself.
Looking at the time I groan, its three thirty and I’ve got to get up and be beautiful in the morning. As much as I’d love to sit here with Gerard and talk about life I just can’t, not tonight.
“I’ve got to go Gerard, Bob…he doesn’t like it when I’m out,” I mumble hoping he won’t say anything about incest even though Bob really isn’t my brother.
“He needs to lighten up,” answers Gerard but nonetheless he gets out of the car. “See you tomorrow Amber.”
“I’ll be around,” I respond.
Gee smiles, showing all his teeth before shutting the door and running across the lawn to his house. I don’t know if I’m allowed to call him a friend or if he just happens to be someone who’s willing to talk to me. Oh well, Gerard Way, in my mind, is my friend…the very best one I’ve got besides Bob and Frank.
Through all the highs and lows
Oh, oh we need each other
Cause no one’s meant to live alone
I sit in my car for almost an hour outside the Way house just waiting. Is Gerard coming? Obviously I made it evident I wanted him to follow me, didn’t I…perhaps not. Well I do, I want him here right now.
Just then the door opens and a boy dressed in a school uniform exits the house, pulling the passenger door open. It’s Gerard and he’s wearing that creepy smile.
“Sweet ride,” he comments not bothering to buckle up, he knows we’re not going anywhere.
“Thanks to the Bryar family,” I mumble lighting a fag and offering him one, he accepts. “You’ve seen this car before Gerard.”
“I know. I still like it. You know I can’t keep doing this,” Gerard announces, smoke coming out of his nostrils and mouth.
“Why not, there’s nothing wrong with what we’re doing. Tonight we aren’t even getting wasted.”
“Mikey,” Gerard answers. “You met him today didn’t you? Don’t think I didn’t see you at lunch, you where eying my little brother.”
I shrug, “He looked hurt, and I’m a compassionate person Gerard. I was worried for him.”
Gerard laughs, looking over at me, his hand slipping into his pocket, “Here –” he hands me a folded up piece of paper – “I drew it.”
I look down at the red eyed vampire standing over a girl, his hand on her shoulder, the caption, ‘Vampires will never hurt you,’ scribbled under it. Only Gerard is capable of drawing something like this. As completely beautiful and sinister and disturbing as the picture is I like it.
“Who’s the girl?” I question already knowing the answer.
“You just happened to be fresh on my mind,” he shrugs, going to take it back. I move it out of his reach.
“I want to keep this one.”
Gerard grimaces but gives up his attempts to get his drawing back. He knows how I am even if we do usually only hang out when we’re both fucked up.
“Gee, I have a –” I think of the right way to word this – “would you be interested in escorting me to Newark every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday?”
Gerard eyes me curiously, “Why are you going to Newark?”
“Well, I have this thing and Bob doesn’t like me going into the city alone. I just thought that...well maybe we’d be able to still hang out just not while doing "bad" things.”
I don’t want to lose Gerard as a friend and if Frank is going to start hanging out with the Ways it’ll be easier if I’m friends with them too. Besides both Gerard and I are trying to get clean. Maybe we could help each other out.
“Is he worried you’ll get hurt?”
I nod. It all sounds stupid and mysterious but in truth it’s simple. I don’t want to worry Bob and I think it’s in everyone’s best interest if Gerard lays off the booze for a little. Besides the thirty minute ride to Newark gets boring sometimes…now I’ll have someone to talk to.
Gerard shrugs, leaning closer, “I guess.”
“Really?”
“Sure, maybe I’ll bring along Mikey, he needs to get out of the house,” answers Gee still too close to me.
“Please don’t, I don’t want anyone to come but you.”
Gerard nods, fiddling with the window switch on his door, “You’re being all mysterious and shit. I kinda like it.”
I roll my eyes laughing a little, “Why are you such a creep?”
“I thought you liked creeps,” Gerard gasps. “Have I been doing this wrong the whole time?”
I laugh. Gerard isn’t half bad when he lets his guard down and acts like himself.
Looking at the time I groan, its three thirty and I’ve got to get up and be beautiful in the morning. As much as I’d love to sit here with Gerard and talk about life I just can’t, not tonight.
“I’ve got to go Gerard, Bob…he doesn’t like it when I’m out,” I mumble hoping he won’t say anything about incest even though Bob really isn’t my brother.
“He needs to lighten up,” answers Gerard but nonetheless he gets out of the car. “See you tomorrow Amber.”
“I’ll be around,” I respond.
Gee smiles, showing all his teeth before shutting the door and running across the lawn to his house. I don’t know if I’m allowed to call him a friend or if he just happens to be someone who’s willing to talk to me. Oh well, Gerard Way, in my mind, is my friend…the very best one I’ve got besides Bob and Frank.
Notes
Author's Note: Happy reading :)Song: We Need Each Other by Sanctus Real
@KidFromYesterday
Yay!!! Thank you, this story has been really great, as well as your others!!
10/2/16