Touch Him Again, And I'll Kill You

“Your eyes hold these small universes in them. Almost like I can see everything I am and everything I want to become. Your smile seems to reassure me in the simplest ways. It’s everything I want. You’re everything I want. I can’t even picture any day in my future without you being in it. God, you really don’t understand how much you mean to me. You are my life. I know these are only words, and they may not even mean anything to you, but I just felt like you needed to know all of this. I’m so sorry for how I’ve been lately. Please forgive me.”
I looked up into his eyes for the first time in the last few minutes. They seemed to be glowing, like a small flame just brought them to life.
“Frank, you don’t have to apologize. I understand it all. You’ve been under a lot of pressure lately what with making sure your grades stay up and constantly having to hide our relationship from your mom. I love you, Frank. You could tell me you hate me and you never want to see me again, and I would still be at your locker every hour after class to tell you you’re beautiful.”
I don’t think I ever quite realized how lucky I was. I had the boy that everyone wanted. I had the boy that made the moon and the sun jealous because they could never have a love like ours.
I had the boy that made the world go round.
I smiled at him, then pressed my lips to his. It was simple and short, but I think he knew how much love was in it.
I linked my hand in is and we stepped out of his car, and walked into school. We were thirty minutes late, but it was okay because the talk we had was very much needed.
“I’m going to go visit Mikey today, do you want to come with?” He asked me. I gave him a look.
“I think we both know why that wouldn’t be possible.”
“Oh yeah. Crazy mom issues.”
I rolled my eyes at him and laughed.
“You remind me of Mikey when you roll your eyes like that. He does it to me a lot.” He gave me a small smile.
“Is that a bad thing?” I asked him
“No, it just feels like my best friend and my boyfriend have been squished into one tiny little person.”
“Doesn’t it ever get weird that the guy you’re fucking reminds you so much of your little brother?” I asked him with a smirk.
“Gross, Frank. Why do you have to put it like that? Now I feel like I need to take ten showers in a row.”
“Hey, that would be the most amount of showers you’ve ever taken!” I laughed at him.
“Oh shut up and go to class. I love you.”
He gave me a quick kiss before heading off in the opposite direction.
I watched him as he walked away. He was so light on his feet, like his happiness could lift him off of the ground. I had been putting that boy through hell lately without even realizing it, but now he was finally okay. He was happy.
I knew it wouldn’t last long, because it never does with him,
You see, Gerard can’t ever catch a break. He just can’t. His world falls apart every day, and he almost kills himself trying to build it back up.
He’s lost everything he has ever cared about, well except for one person. But maybe even that was too good to last, because this small, beautiful moment in this hallway was the last time I saw him for the next six months. But I didn’t know that yet.

Notes