I Think I Like It

The majority of the next day was spent with Gerard and I researching different methods of therapy, and which ones we thought would be most helpful to him. Mikey contacted his own therapist and got Gerard an appointment for the following week, so now all that was left was to make sure Gerard stayed sober until then.
That was made easier by me and Mikey emptying the bottles down the sink. I was worried about Mikey being that close to that much alcohol, but he just laughed and said it was ‘liberating’. We didn’t touch the pills, because we reasoned that he might actually need those at some point, but Mikey promised he’d keep an eye on him.
“You know, I’m pretty sure that whole cold turkey thing doesn’t work.” Gerard snapped as he drove me home. Of course, he was pretty against the whole idea. I just rolled my eyes.
“It’s necessary. If your new therapist says that it’s not the best thing, then we’ll go about it another way. Can’t you just try?” I sighed, seeing the diligent look on his face.
“You both suck.” He said childishly in response. It wasn’t a ‘no’, though, which was helpful. I leaned in to kiss him softly, undoing my seatbelt.
“I’ll see you tomorrow. Remember, we’re meeting Joe at lunch.” I said. He groaned.
“Fuck, I forgot. Shit, Frank, I’m actually kind of worried.” He said nervously. I stroked his cheek.
“Hey, Joe loves me, you know? Dude’s like my brother. He just needs to see that you’re not trying to hurt me.”
“And if he doesn’t?”
“I’ll convince him to keep his mouth shut. Don’t worry, honey, nothing’s gonna happen to us.” I said gently. He smiled a little out of the side of his mouth.
“If you say so, sugar.” He sighed. I kissed him again.
“I do. Goodnight, Gee.”
“Night.” He smiled. As always, he waited until I got to my front door to drive away. I walked in and planned to go straight to my room to finalize the plans for tomorrow with Chris.
My Mom, apparently, had other plans. She intercepted me on the way to the stairs.
“Frank.” She said sternly. I sucked in a breath.
“Hi, Mom.” I smiled weakly.
“I got a letter from your school yesterday.” She said, walking towards the living room. I followed her in, chewing my thumbnail nervously.
“Oh. What about?” I asked nervously. She waved the letter.
“It’s from your English teacher. Mr. Way.” She said gently. My mouth dropped in genuine surprise.
“W-what does it say?” I stammered. She smiled.
“He said that you’re getting the highest grades in your class for this semester.” She beamed.
“He did?” I asked. She nodded and passed me the letter. It was typed, but his messy scrawl signed it. Oh.
“Well, that’s great.” I smiled.
“I hope I didn’t scare you too much.” She laughed. I shook my head.
“Nah, it’s fine.” I smiled. She leaned back.
“Can I ask you a sort of awkward question?” she asked. I had a feeling I knew what she was going to say.
“Um, okay?”
“Do you know if Mr. Way is, um, single?” she asked, shifting uncomfortably. Now, this wasn’t unusual, really. Since Dad died, Mom and me were pretty open about relationships and stuff. The only thing that made it weird, of course, was that the guy she was referring to was literally my boyfriend, and possibly the love of my life. I coughed to hide my laugh.
“Why do you ask?”
“I just- he left his number at the bottom of the letter in case I need to ask him anything, I’m assuming, and I wasn’t sure if you’d be comfortable with me calling him.” She said. I shouldn’t have been finding this as amusing as I was.
“I think he’s with someone.” I said quickly, not sure how comfortable I was with my Mom trying to flirt with my boyfriend.
“Think?”
“I’m pretty sure. He talks about them a lot. Sounds pretty serious.” I shrugged. She chewed her lip.
“So I shouldn’t call him?” she asked. I felt pretty bad, if I’m honest. In a way, I wished I could just tell her, but I knew she’d go crazy.
“No, Mom, I don’t think so.”
“Is that because it’d make you uncomfortable?”
“No, really. I genuinely do think he’s with someone. He comes into class with like, lovebites and stuff a lot.” I said, leaving out the part where I was the one giving them to him. Her face dropped a little.
“Oh. That’s disappointing.”
“Not really. He’s sort of an asshole, Mom.” I laughed. She smiled and nodded, and I took that as my cue to leave.
“Ah, Frank?” she called. I looked over my shoulder at her, and she smiled warmly.
“How was your weekend at Cameron’s?”
“Oh, yeah, it was fine.” I shrugged, finally making it up to my bedroom.

It was a toss-up with who I should call first, but since my conversation with Chris could potentially be long-winded, I decided on Gerard first.
“Hey there, sugar.” He answered. I smiled.
“What’s up with the letter you sent my Mom?” I asked. He was silent, then chuckled softly.
“I didn’t think she’d show you that.”
“She did.”
“Oh. Well, it’s true. According to the test scores, anyway, you’re working at a higher level than anyone else in the class.”
“I think it’s all of the cum I’ve been swallowing.” I said thoughtfully. He barked a laugh.
“What makes you think that?” he smiled.
“Well, if you’re smart, then surely, with the amount of your cum I drink, I’ll have like, absorbed some of it.” I chuckled. He sniggered.
“I don’t think it works like that, Frankie. But I am proud of you. Exceedingly, actually.”
“You didn’t even tell me.”
“I didn’t think you’d care.” He laughed. Admittedly, I wouldn’t have if it was any other lesson.
“Fair.”
“Anyway, it gives me an excuse to talk about you to other teachers. You know, like, “did you hear about Frank Iero who got an A on his quiz?” That sort of thing. It’s not as fun as telling them sex stories, but we’ll get there.” He laughed.
“Speaking of sex stories, I just had the most awkward conversation with my Mom ever.”
“You told her you’d had sex?”
“Um, no. Almost. She asked me if you were single.”
“Oh God.”
“Yeah. I said that I didn’t think so.”
“Asshole.”
“And then she asked if she should call you.”
“Right.”
“I told her not to.”
“Good call. Damn, that would have been horrific.”
“Be nice or I’ll tell her to call you right now.” I smiled. He groaned.
“Your Mom seems awesome, but honestly, what even is the protocol for when your boyfriend’s Mother, who doesn’t know you’re his boyfriend, starts flirting with you? Like, do I hide?”
“Hiding wouldn’t work. She’d drag you back.”
“Shit. I’m so not looking forward to us telling her.” He sighed.
“We won’t, then. I mean, we will, but we’ll do it as I’m walking out the door. Like, ‘okay, bye mom, I’m running away with my English teacher’ kind of.” I chuckled. He paused.
“You’d do that?”
“Yeah. And I will, just as soon as I graduate.” I smiled. He sighed.
“Okay, well, I have to go because some asshole was too busy throwing away my booze to let me do my marking, so I’ve got to do it now.”
“Okay, goodnight babe.” I sighed.
“Night, darling.” He said, hanging up.

My next course of action was to call Chris.
“Hey, bro.”
“Hey. Everything cool for tomorrow?”
“Yeah. Joe’s not mad at you, by the way.”
“Well, great.” I snapped. Chris snorted.
“I mean, he’s not going to be off with you. He just wants to make sure that Mr. Way isn’t abusing you.”
“You totally thought of a dirty joke when you said that.” I teased, and he groaned.
“Yeah, and I hate myself for it. Anyway, the three of us will go to the coffee shop and sit at the table behind the wall, and then you get your boo to come find us, and we can all talk about what’s going down.” Chris said calmly.
“Okay. Worst case scenario, what if Joe decides to tell?”
“You and I can talk to him and try to talk him out of it, and if that doesn’t work, I’ll help you guys deny everything.”
“Thanks, buddy. This is why you’re my favourite.” I sighed, leaning back on my bed. Chris gave a light laugh.
“Joe means well, you know that. He just doesn’t understand ‘cause he hasn’t seen it. I think maybe I’d have a hard time understanding if I didn’t see you constantly choosing each other over the world, every single day.”
“Yeah, and apparently everyone else sees it too.” I sighed.
“Yeah, they do. Notice, though, that even though everybody thinks it, nobody’s said anything to you about it.”
“Because they’d rather talk shit about me behind my back?”
“No, because they’re not talking shit. I mean, the girls do a bit, because they’re jealous, but mostly, everyone sort of just…respects it. I guess it’s ‘cause you’re not like, weird about it. When I look at you two, I don’t see a student and a teacher who are fucking. I see two people who are desperately in love, and I think everyone else sees that too. I mean, they don’t know for certain like I do, but even the rumors are respectful. Like, there was this one rumor that you guys had had sex on Mr. Way’s desk or something, and I mean, everyone was kind of amused by it, but they mostly were just like ‘oh okay’. Nobody’s gonna be shocked if this gets out.”
“Um. The teachers might.” I pointed out. He laughed dryly.
“Yeah, okay. I mean, I think even some of them suspect too, if I’m honest, but as long as nobody finds out anything for certain, you guys are okay. Just keep this going until July.”
“How do the teachers know?” I exclaimed. He chuckled.
“Because you two really do stare at each other a lot.”
“Right. Sorry.”
“Hey, don’t apologise. It’s adorable. Actually, I’m sort of surprised that Joe didn’t notice earlier.”
“I think he’s too nice to notice. Like, he didn’t want to make up shit, even in his head.”
“Yeah, that makes sense. Anyway, when I saw you two in the coffee shop together, that kind of confirmed it in my head. I was thinking it anyway, of course, but actually watching you two together just made me realize that yeah, you two literally need each other. He’ll see that too.” He said softly. I smiled.
“Thanks, buddy. I’m gonna get some sleep.”
“Okay, me too. See you tomorrow.”
“Yeah. Oh, and Chris?”
“Yeah?”
“We did fuck on his desk. Twice.”
“Well, that’s the last time I ever touch that. Night, brother.”
“Yep, you too.” I said, hanging up, suddenly feeling a lot better.

That’s how I found myself, at about half past one, sitting in the coffee shop with Joe and Chris.
As promised, Joe hadn’t been weird with me at all, and had actually apologized for his behavior. I assured him that it was okay, that we were both drugged out, and that we should ignore it.
I apologized for lying to him, and he said he forgave me, but that he didn’t want me putting myself in danger. My protests that Gerard would never hurt me fell on deaf ears, so eventually I stopped trying.
“So, have you guys read the new issue of Doom Patrol?” I asked, sipping my coffee. Both guys shook their heads.
“Nah, I haven’t had the money to buy it.” Joe shrugged.
“I’ll lend you mine if you want?” I suggested. He smiled.
“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks.” He said. I nodded and turned my head just in time to see Gerard walk in, his phone pressed to his ear. I hadn’t had my lesson with him that day yet, so I hadn’t seen him, and my eyes pretty much almost fell out of my head. Instead of his normal suit jacket and loose tie, he was wearing a band t-shirt and a leather jacket, with tight black jeans that made his ass look like it’d been carved by angels. He smiled and nodded when he saw us, and I saw Joe tense.
“Please, just give him a chance.” I implored him. He squared his jaw.
“I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to actually kill someone as much as I wanna kill him.” He growled. Chris stayed silent, his hand softly on Joe’s shoulder. Gerard raised one hand up in greeting as he slid into the seat next to me.
“Yeah, that’s awesome. Thanks. Okay, I gotta go. See you then. Bye.” He said, hanging up. He gave me a sheepish smile as an apology and leaned in to kiss me, but caught himself when he saw Joe’s face, and leaned back, clearing his voice awkwardly.
“Who was that?” I asked. He smiled.
“Mikey’s therapist. I’m officially signed up and ready to go.” He beamed. I entwined our fingers and pulled him down for a quick kiss, ignoring the way Joe’s eyes widened in horror.
“I’m so proud of you, honey.” I murmured, stroking his cheek. He chuckled, his smile bright on his face as he leaned in and kissed me again, before turning his attention to my friends, our entwined hands still resting in his lap.
“Nice to see you again, Chris.” He nodded. Chris nodded back.
“Joe.” He said, his eyes falling on him. Joe pressed his lips together.
“Thank you for agreeing to meet with me.” He Gerard said coolly. Joe raised his eyebrows in surprise.
“You’re being pretty civil for a sex offender.” Joe snapped. Gerard laughed lightly.
“I’m not actually a sex offender. Frank’s 18, remember?”
“You could still get arrested.”
“Uh, yeah. That’s true. That’s sort of why I was hoping we could clear this all up.” Gerard said softly.
“Leave Frank alone and I won’t tell.” He said bluntly. Gerard breathed in sharply.
“Ha, see, I think I’d actually do that. You know, it sounds like a fair trade. But I can’t.” he said. Joe raised his eyebrows cynically.
“Why not?”
“Because I think I’d much rather spend a couple years in prison than have to stay away from him.”
“Is the sex that good?” Joe sneered. This was sort of out of character for him, and it was odd seeing him be so aggressive. Gerard chewed his lip and shook his head.
“Do I look like I’m using him for sex? Would I be going through all of this if it was just for a fuck?” Gerard asked.
“But you are fucking him.” Joe sighed.
“Well, not that it’s much of anyone’s business, but yes, we do, uh, ‘fuck’, as you so eloquently put it.”
“Which is wrong.”
“What’s wrong about me making love to my boyfriend, Joe?” Gerard asked, tilting his head slightly. I felt an electric current run through me when he said ‘making love’. It sounds silly, but he’d never called it that before, and it made it sound really, really nice. Joe sighed, clearly irritated.
“It’s not making love though, is it?”
“Isn’t it? I love him, and I want to show him how much I love him by making him feel good in any way I can, and that includes with my body. Isn’t that what people are supposed to do when they’re in love?” Gerard said slowly, clearly trying to talk about sex while trying to avoid any explicit detail. Joe snorted, seeing right through him.
“But you don’t love him. You love fucking him. Look, Mr. Way, I don’t have anything against you as a person. Honestly, I’ve always thought you were pretty cool, but I won’t let you prey on my best friend. He’s like my brother, and I gotta look out for him.” Joe said, surprisingly civilly considering his previous behavior. Gerard nodded understandingly.
“I understand that you feel protective, Joe. I have a little brother, and I’d probably be doing exactly what you’re doing right now if I thought he was in danger. He, uh, he just woke up from a coma that he was in for three years, and if I thought there was any way to prevent it, I’d go back in time and do what you’re doing now and more to keep him safe. I understand, Joe, I do. But you’re wrong.” He said softly.
“I’m sorry about your brother.” Joe said gently. Gerard smiled.
“He’s okay now.”
“Does he know about Frank?” Joe asked, his voice slightly calmer now. Gerard smirked.
“Yeah, he does. They’re really good friends, too. They actually gang up on me a lot, which is annoying.” He chuckled, and I smiled vaguely.
“Even though he knows that you could get in trouble? He still lets you do it?” Joe asked. Gerard nodded.
“Because he knows that I’d rather die than be without him.”
“That’s stupid. You’ve lived like, thirty something years without him. Why is he suddenly so essential?” Joe asked.
“I don’t know. I didn’t choose to love him. Sometimes I really wish I didn’t. Like, I’ll have nights where I’m in bed, and I’ve got a bottle of rum in one hand and a bunch of pills in the other, and neither of them make me feel the way he does, but he’s always so far away, so they’ll have to do. And it’s those times where I think ‘fuck, I wish I wasn’t so in love’. But I am. And you know what? Even though I know I’m nowhere near good enough for him, I really wouldn’t have it any other way.” He said, turning to me and stroking my jawline softly. I hummed happily and snuggled into his side.
“Yes you are. You’re more than enough.” I murmured, not really intending for the other two to hear, but knowing they probably did.
“God.” Joe groaned, running a hand through his hair.
“What?” I asked.
“I want to be okay with this, but I’m just not.” He sighed. Well, at least he was being honest. I leaned forward then, looking at him dead in the eyes.
“Joe, please. I’ve never felt this before for anyone or anything, and I won’t ever again. Ge-Mr. Way is like, my other half. My better half. We’re like the same person. Please don’t tear me away from him. I’ve worked so hard to just be able to have him, and I don’t know if I’d live if you took him from me.” I said hoarsely. Gerard squeezed my hand. Joe shook his head.
“But it’s just wrong. He’s your teacher, he should know better.”
“I never know better, generally.” Gerard smirked.
“You should. I mean, how can we be sure it’s just Frank? How can I know, for certain, that there isn’t some other random kid you’re lusting after?”
“Because this isn’t about him being a student and me trying to fulfill a fantasy, Joe. It’s him. I’d love him if he were 20 years older than me, or younger than me, or the same age. I’d love him in any universe, in any world, in any dimension. It’s like he told you, we’re like the same person. We’re like…”
“Soulmates.” Chris said softly, speaking for the first time since we’d sat down. Gerard smiled and ducked his head, and I couldn’t help but melt a little at how cute it was.
“Yeah. Soulmates.” He chuckled. There was silence for a moment before Joe spoke.
“Everybody knows anyway, right? That’s what Chris said. Everybody else already guessed.” He said. I nodded.
“According to Chris we, ah, stare at each other a lot.” I murmured. Joe smiled softly.
“Well. You kind of do, actually.” He said with a light laugh. I leaned back into Gerard’s waiting arms, and he pulled me closer to him, pressing a warm kiss behind my ear.
“See, you gotta stop staring at me, sugar.” He chuckled.
“Um. You stare at me way more than I stare at you.” I argued.
“That’s not true.” Chris cut in.
“You really do look at his ass a lot.” Joe murmured, his face pulled up into a small smile. I felt hope bubbling in my chest.
“Well. It’s nice.” I said weakly in my defense. Gerard laughed gently, nuzzling his face into my neck, and I’d never been happier for the wall separating us from the view of the other customers (who may have been able to see us if they were actually looking, but they weren’t.)
“You need to shave.” I said, pushing his head from out of the crook of my neck. He ran a hand along his chin and frowned.
“You two are so married.” Chris laughed. Joe sucked in a breath.
“You’re not gonna like, elope, right?” he asked. Gerard raised his eyebrows.
“It wouldn’t be an elopement if you knew it was going to happen.” He smiled, tightening his arms around me. Joe sort of nodded in a way that said ‘well, fair enough’, and no more was said.
“Baby, baby, baby.” I said, drumming my fingers on his chest to get his attention.
“What, what, what?” he sang back, smiling.
“You gotta go back.” I reminded him. His eyes swept up to the clock and he cursed under his breath.
“That’s not fun.”
“I’ll see you soon though.” I said, my thumb sweeping across his cheek. He groaned and leaned in for a kiss.
“You kids and your need for an education.” He sighed. I pecked his lips softly, feeling them turn up slightly under mine.
“Go be productive.” I said, practically pushing him away. He pouted at me, then turned to smile at the guys.
“It was good to see you. And Joe, thank you for taking the time to listen. Even if you do decide to end things for Frank and I, I respect your choices. Like I said, I’d do anything for my brother, so I know how it is. I just hope you find it in yourself to realize that I would rather die than hurt him, because I’m honestly just so in love with him.” Gerard said. Joe just nodded, and Gerard took that as his cue to leave.
I looked down into my now cold coffee, feeling nerves running through my body.
“We should get going.” I murmured, dragging myself to my feet, feeling disheartened. Joe wore a disturbed frown on his face, and I just knew my days with Gerard were numbered. I put a hand on Joe’s shoulder and smiled.
“Thanks for looking out for me, buddy. I mean, I don’t agree with you, but I appreciate that you’re just doing it because you love me.”
“Can I ask you a really, really personal question?” he asked.
“Sure.”
“Who, um…you know. Who…” he said, making obscene hand gestures. I couldn’t not laugh.
“Who goes on the bottom?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. He blushed and nodded.
“Does it matter?”
“Well, no. I’m just curious.” He asked.
“He does, normally. I do sometimes, too, but he prefers when he is.” I said. Joe blushed redder and nodded.
“Dude, if you want gory details, just ask for them.” I smirked. He shifted his weight uncomfortably.
“It’s just hard to imagine, you know?” he said softly. Chris snorted.
“Just wait until they start flirting in front of you. It’s sickening.”
“Gross.” Joe said, wrinkling his nose.
“It’s his brother you guys should be feeling bad for.” I said, a small smile on my lips.
“Why?” Chris asked.
“Because his room is next to ours.” I smiled. Both boys’ eyes widened and they looked horrified. I beamed at them.
“I still don’t think it’s right, but…dammit, you guys are pretty cute. I can’t deny that. And he really does love you, Frankie.” Joe sighed, defeated. I beamed, bouncing on my heels.
“Does that mean you won’t tell?” I asked hopefully. He sighed and chewed his lip.
“I…I guess not. I mean, dude, it’s still fucked up, but you’re happy, and if he’s really not hurting you or forcing you into anything, then it’s none of my business. But the second I think it’s going too far, I’m speaking up.” He said. I grinned and pulled both him and Chris into a tight hug.
“I love you guys.” I breathed.
“I love you too. Also, your boy is gonna be real pissed at you if you’re late to his lesson.” Chris laughed.
“Oh no, maybe he’ll punish me.” I said suggestively, wiggling my hips. Joe and Chris groaned simultaneously.
“That’s nasty.” Joe sighed.
“Get used to it.” Chris muttered.

As it happened, we were precisely three minutes late to Gerard’s lesson. He looked up in fake annoyance when we tumbled into the class.
“Nice of you to join us, boys.” He said coldly. Chris gave me a ‘what the fuck’ kind of look, but I just smiled reassuringly at him as I took my seat.
“Something funny, Iero?” he snapped.
“Um, no sir. Sorry.” I said. He raised an eyebrow and gave a short sigh.
“Anyway, to answer your question, Katie, I think that we’ve pretty much finished Othello. Honestly, my job was to get you guys through Mockingbird, and since we’ve done that, it’s just gonna have to be us going back to analyzing short extracts and stuff. I hope that’s okay.” He said, smirking, ‘cause he knew we definitely preferred that. He leaned on his desk and chewed the end of his pen thoughtfully.
“I think I want you guys to find your favourite quote from your favourite book. Or any book, actually. Just, a quote that you love. I think that’s important.” He said.
He gestured to the wide expanses of the bookcase behind him.
“If you want to sift through these, feel free. Or you can go on your phones, or whatever. A person’s favourite book says the world about them.” The last part, I imagine, was said more to himself.
“Like you and To Kill A Mockingbird?” Anna asked. Since her party, I’ve wanted nothing more than to smack both her and her slut of a brother. Gerard smiled tightly at her.
“Yes. But I wouldn’t say that that’s where my favourite quote is from.” He smiled softly, returning to his desk. One by one, students filed up to the front of the room to look through his small collection of books. I, however, already knew which one I was going to use.
It was from Wuthering Heights, believe it or not. I’d read it a while ago, maybe sometime last year while we were studying those little extracts, and it’d been floating around my mind recently, considering everything. I thought about Gerard and his self-destruction, his addiction, his loathing, and I realized that I really couldn’t have chosen a better quote. I scribbled it down, remembering it almost completely from memory, and stared at the words on my sheet.

A few minutes passed before Gerard stood back up, smiling softly at the class.
“Okay, so who feels comfortable reading theirs out?” he asked. I pursed my lips and looked down at my desk. He’d know, very clearly, what mine was about if I read it, and I wasn’t sure how he’d react. Someone put their hand up, and Gerard smiled warmly at them as they read in a shaky voice. I thought I recognized it, but the book they named was unfamiliar to me.
“Thanks, Jasmine. Very brave to go first.” He laughed. Nobody else put their hands up, and he smiled a little bit.
“Would you guys feel more comfortable if I read mine?” he asked. Everyone nodded their heads. I leaned forward slightly, intrigued as to what he’d chosen.
He cleared his throat, holding up a copy of the novel ‘Smack.’ I’d definitely heard the title, but I’d never read the book.

“Sometimes maybe you need an experience. The experience can be a person, or it can be a drug. The experience opens a door that was there all the time but you never saw it. Or maybe it blasts you into outer space.” He read, his voice taking on that beautiful, silky hum that it had whenever he read aloud. I felt my teeth catch on my lip, a swelling in my heart. I knew what he was trying to say with his quote, and it stung me to the very core of my existence. Maybe I was taking it too literally, of course, but it sounded like his quote was either about me, or it was about drugs. What scared me, though, was that it might be about both. I rose shakily to my feet.
“I want to read mine.” I said softly. He nodded solemnly, and I wondered if his message had been more intentional than I’d thought. I took a deep breath, my legs shaking.

“May you not rest as long as I am living; you said I killed you—haunt me, then! The murdered do haunt their murderers, I believe. I know that ghosts have wandered on earth. Be with me always—take any form—drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! it is unutterable! I cannot live without my life! I cannot live without my soul!' I said, my voice shaking with the force of the emotion I was trying to hold back. A noise arose from Gerard’s throat that was akin to a soft whimper, but he covered it by clearing his throat.
“Interesting choice. I think it’s quite fitting that you read yours after mine.” He said, raising an eyebrow. I blushed.
“I guess so. Can I ask you something?” I said, not really caring that everyone was around me, watching us. Apparently, they all knew anyway, right?He nodded slowly, sitting on his desk again.
“Your experience. Is it a person or is it a drug?” I asked. I heard a collective breath being let out by the class. Gerard’s face contorted first into embarrassment, and then into pain. He looked up at me through his eyelashes.
“Are you suggesting I do drugs, Mr. Iero?” he asked, his voice threatening. I sunk back down into my seat and smiled, realizing just how stupidly obvious I was being.
“No, I was being hypothetical.” I said simply. He just smiled tightly and turned his attention back to the class. I buried my head in my arms, feeling like a fucking idiot, because I was one.
The rest of the class read out their quotes. A lot of them had to do with love, but none were quite as intense as mine. Gerard’s eyes would stray to me occasionally, and his face would show true, raw pain, as if I was missing something important.

I got my answer at the end of class. We were all starting to pack our stuff away, and Chris was already leaning against my desk, looking at me disapprovingly.
“Way to make it obvious, Frank.” He said, smacking my arm. I sighed.
“I’m sorry. It wasn’t that bad, was it?”
“You covered it well, but it was still weird.” Chris admitted. I nodded slowly.
“Frank?” Gerard called. I looked up, gulping hard. He smiled sadly at me. Some of the class was still in the room, and I assumed that that was why his answer was so cryptic:
“To answer your question, my experience was a person. Of course.”
“Right.” I said, shoving my books into my bag.
“Can I see you for a second?” he asked. I nodded and made my way to his desk, ignoring the way my classmates stared at me as they left. He sighed and smiled.
“That was risky.”
“I didn’t mean to.”
“It’s okay. I was more shocked that you even had to ask.” He murmured. I shifted.
“I didn’t want to assume-“
“You should assume. I choose you over drugs or alcohol or anything. Of course you’re the damn experience that blasted me into space.” He chuckled. I nodded. He pursed his lips before continuing.
“I feel like your choice was somewhat intentional too?” he murmured.
“I just love you a lot.” I sighed. He held my hand.
“I’m not going anywhere. I’m getting better, remember? You don’t have to worry about that.”
“I didn’t mean to upset you. It just seemed like a potent quote.”
“It was. It was beautifully chosen.” He smiled weakly. I kissed him on the cheek as I left.
“Oh, Joe said he wouldn’t tell.” I smiled. Gerard smiled weakly back at me and nodded.
“Good. I’m glad to hear it.” He sighed. I rocked myself back on my heels for a moment, unmoving. As if he’d only just realized I was there, he looked up and gave a slow, calm smile.
“Is there anything else?” he asked in his ‘teacher voice’.
“You told Joe that we um, we made love. I think that’s not true.” I breathed. He smirked and rose to his feet, nodding slowly.
“That’s because it’s not true.” He murmured, his hands closing around my wrists.
“What we do is fucking. You know, you’ll hold me down and fuck me into a mattress, or I’ll sit on you and ride your dick. It’s nice, but it’s fucking.” He said dismissively. I nodded gently.
“But making love? That would be different. If I was gonna make love to you, Frankie, I’d start it off all sweet and slow.” He said, leaning forward and kissing me softly, his hands going limp around my wrists, and instead entwining with my hands.
“And then, I’d kiss your neck, like this” he said, pressing his lips to the soft flesh of my throat, “and I’d tell you that I love you so much. I’d say that you’re everything to me.”
“R-right.” I gasped. He smiled.
“And then I’d lay you down like this.” He murmured, pushing me against the desk until I was lying down flat, and he was standing between my legs.
“And then I’d slowly slide into you, sweetheart, all soft and slow, and I’d kiss your pretty little jaw while I did it, and you’d whimper when I filled you up. And then I’d hold your hands, like this” he said, his voice a thick whisper as he held both of my hands and held them down to the desk above my head.
“And I’d rock into you softly, l-like this.” He breathed, grinding the hardness in his jeans against mine.
“And baby, I’d show you how much I love you, and you’d feel it so entirely, so completely, that you’d cum just from how in love you are, and then I’d moan, and I’d say oh, baby, yeah, and I’d cum inside you, and then I’d kiss you, like this” he said, pressing a lazy kiss to my mouth. I gasped, my whole body trembling underneath him.
“I want that.” I gasped. He chuckled and kissed me softly.
“Yeah, I do too. I’ll make love to you soon then, sugar. Fuck you all nice and slow. That’s what my baby wants, isn’t it?” he purred, stroking my hair. I nodded. He chuckled and kissed me, pulling me up from the desk.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, love.” He sighed, leaning against the desk. That little tease.

Notes

I feel like this chapter is (for lack of a better term) utter shit.
Actually, I sort of feel that way about the last few chapters. Sorry for being utter shit. <3