Love Should Always Be Blind

Arriving to the hospital happened in a blur. And once we got there the paramedics rushed Gerard to surgical room where they could examine and sew up his wounds. I had to stay back and wait in the waiting room for Susan, Sarah, and or Matt to arrive. The waiting was killing me and I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew was someone nudging me awake.

“Frank, wake up man.” Matt whispered loudly.

“Mm?” I groaned, my back aching as I sat up straight.

“It's time to go.” He informed, as I rubbed sleep out of my eyes, while the hospital lights momentarily blinded me.

“What? What about Susan?” I asked, my voice deep with sleep.

“She's staying the night. She went straight back to Gee when she got here. She had to fill medical information papers out.” Matt answered for me.

“When can we go see him though?” I pressed, eager to be with Gee.

“Not tonight.” He responded sadly.

“What? Why not?” I demanded, raising my voice more than I should have considering I was in a hospital waiting room.

“Shh. Because he's not even going to wake up until morning.” He explained, “And Mom's staying the night. Sarah's going to take me and you home.” I made an sound of annoyance in the back of my throat. I really just wanted to stay with Gerard, but then again Mother triumphs boyfriend every time. I merely ended up sighing.

“Where's Sarah anyways?” I wondered, looking around the quiet waiting room for any signs of her, but came up with none.

“She's bringing the car around.” Matt informed.

“Wait? How long have you two been here? How long have I been asleep?” I ranted off.

“Me and Sarah got here like a little over an hour ago. And I have no idea how long you've been asleep.” He informed.

“God.” I groaned, rubbing my hands down my face.

“I know.” Matt muttered sorrowfully, “But it's going to be okay.” He reassured.

*****

The ride back home with Sarah and Matt was silent. I wasn't in the mood for talk anyways. After spending the afternoon trying to stabilize Gerard on the floor screaming and crying, I was wiped. I felt sad too. Sad I couldn't have made Gerard feel better before he had to get to such a point of breaking down. Sad that when he did get to the point of breaking down, I couldn't even calm him down. Sad that he had to end up staying the night in the hospital instead of warm and safe in my arms. But he wasn't safe in my arms. I couldn't protect him like I wished I could. He was in a hospital bed, knocked unconscience from sedatives.

On the way home Sarah stopped at a McDonald's drive thru for dinner. I just got a coffee and some fries. I didn't have much of an appetite. We ate our food on the way home. Matt had fallen asleep in the backseat by the time we got home. I offered to carry him up to his room instead of waking him up. The poor kid had already had a hard enough day. He deserved to sleep as much as possible. Being a quarterback he was fit but strong, but even with my muscles it was harder than I anticipated to carry him but I made it. Tucking him in like a child, I brought the covers up to his chin. He looked so peaceful when he was sleeping. Just like Gerard. Matt and Gerard had the same green hazel eyes they'd inherited from their mother; color and shape, even with eyes closed. Watching the kid sleep made my heart ache. I had a feeling that he was growing up sooner than he needed to. I had a feeling that everyone in this house grew up sooner than they needed to. With that thought and a sigh, I turned and left the room, closing the door quietly behind me.

Walking downstairs I found Sarah sitting on the couch starring at the wall, a glazed look over her eyes. For a split second I considered leaving her to be alone. If she needed the alone time I didn't want to intrude. But then again, I figured if she needed the comfort I'd offer it, even if I was probably the last person she'd seek comfort from. Worst case scenario, she's tell me to fuck off. With this thought in mind, I tentatively stepped deeper inside the room, crossing it and sitting down beside Sarah. She didn't even flinch. This concerned me, so I decided to gently wrap an arm around her small waist.

“Sarah?” I murmured, trying to gently break her from her trance but not scare her at the same time. Jerking against my arm a bit, I jumped back as well.

“Oh?” She breathed, looking around the room with her deep blue crystal eyes, until they landed on me. “Frank? I'm sorry...I guess I just spaced out for a minute.” She went on shaking her head.

“It's okay...are you alright?” I pressed, rubbing her arm up and down. She nodded her head quickly, waving off my concern.

“Yeah. I'm okay.” Sarah shrugged, “I just...y'know. I worry about him.” She confessed. I nodded in understanding.

“Yeah, I know. Me too.” I agreed mournfully. We were silent for a moment not sure what to say to each other. Awkwardly I removed my arm from around her.

“You know I really do love Gerard...” I murmured not quit sure where I was going with this, “I care about him. I would never hurt him.” Sarah paused, turning to inspect my face. I looked back, studying her face; all her freckles scattered across her nose and cheeks, her blue eyes that were almost too powerful that it made me want to look away.

“I know.” She finally whispered. “I do. And I appreciate the way you took care of Gerard today. How you didn't just freak out but tried to actually help...a lot of people would just freeze.”

“Yeah but I didn't do help much anyways. I couldn't get him to stop hurting himself or freaking out.” I muttered bitterly.

“You can't think like that. Honestly, Frank.” Sarah demanded, her eyes boring into mine, swimming with an intensity I didn't understand, “When Gerard first started getting bad episodes like this, I couldn't do anything to help. I froze...I could only watch. But you...you jumped right in; Matt told me. And that's all you can do. Gerard isn't easy to handle in situations like that. He's not himself and honestly you can't calm him down. When it gets that bad you just have to contain him until an ambulance shows up. And if you're going to be with Gerard that's something else you have to understand and accept. You can't just fix him. All you can do is try and help him.” Starring at her, I nodded trying my best to fully absorb what she was telling me.

“I know...it just... sucks. I want to fix him so bad. I want him to feel better and I feel like shit because I can't. Like I'm not being good enough for him.” I confessed, bowing my head, breaking our staring contest. Sarah rested a hesitant hand onto my shoulder.

“I know the feeling. But feeling sorry for ourselves doesn't do Gerard any good.” She pointed out gently.

“Yeah.” I sighed heavily, “But thanks.”

“No problem. I'm used to it.” She shrugged, taking her hand back.

“And what you said earlier...” I mentioned, looking back up, “About freezing when Gerard got upset. You were a kid Sarah. Kids don't know what to do in a situation like that. Fuck, I hardly do.” Sarah laughed, a small smile gracing her lips.

“Thanks.” She murmured

“No sweat.” I said, shrugging one shoulder. Again we were silent, only that time a little less awkward. Leaning back on the couch, I folded my arms over my chest, comfortably. Sarah shifted back to face me, hugging her knees to her chest.

“Hey, Frank...I'm sorry.” She whispered. Furrowing my eyebrows together, I offered a confused look. I didn't know what she was talking about. “For being a bitch to you since like the moment we met. I guess I just...I dunno.” She sighed, “He's my little brother. I have to protect him and seeing him grow up right before my eyes isn't easy.” I nodded slowly

“I get it. It's okay.” I offered.

“But it's not,” She shook her head vigorously, “I've been nothing but a bitch to you. And I even tried to get Gerard to go on a date with one of my friends. I feel horrible.” I swallowed hard. So she did want to set up Gerard on a date, in hopes of breaking us up. I couldn't help but feel anger pang in my chest. I loved Gerard, with all my heart. And Sarah tried to take that from me. But she was sorry. Pushing the anger aside, I knew I had to be the bigger person and forgive her. Plus now wasn't the time to start a fight.

“I forgive you.” I managed to say.

“You shouldn't.” She muttered shamefully, casting her eyes down into her lap.

“You're right.” I agreed, causing her eyes to snap back onto my face, “But I do. It's over with.” Sarah nodded glumly.

“It's just that...you're making him grow up. And I'm around to see it everyday. I just felt so upset and mad at you for it. Like you're taking his innocence away from him, introducing him to cigarettes and sex and love. You're making him grow up. And that's good. But I couldn't understand and I thought you didn't really love him. That he was just another boyfriend to you. I didn't want Gerard to get anymore hurt than he needed to. I was just trying to protect him.” She tried to explain, “But I was stupid. I see that now. I know you really do care for him.” I was stunned. I didn't know how much Sarah really disliked me. I could understand why though, hearing it all from her in that moment. It was true; I was forcing Gerard to grow up and Sarah was there everyday to witness it. It wasn't a normal relationship, us all living in the same house...our parents engaged.

“It's alright.” I finally said, “I get it. I mean I'm an only child, but I see how much you care about him. He's your little brother.” Sarah didn't say anything but continued to stare at me with a mix of grief and thanks. Without a word she lunged towards me, wrapping her arms around me in a hug. Shocked, I didn't move at first but slowly wrapped my arms back around her, accepting the gesture.

“Thank you, Frank.” She whispered into my shoulder.

“Of course.” I murmured into her soft brown hair.

“I give you and Gerard my blessing.” She laughed weakly. I laughed back, tightening my hold around her, knowing she needed the affection.

“Thanks, Sarah.”

*****

Gerard was able to come home from the hospital the next day, late in the afternoon. He had to talk with a psychiatrist and go through an evaluation to make sure he wasn't suicidal and his episode wasn't some kind of form of an attempt at suicide. I guess it was just standard procedure. But he was forced to start going to therapy seeing as his episodes were getting more intense and frequent within the last year. He wasn't happy I could tell, but if it meant we didn't have to go through with another Wednesday like that, I wasn't go to let him off the hook. So after the nurses checked on his wounds and the doctor gave us the OK, he was sent home. Dad had been gone on a business trip during the whole ordeal and Susan had me call him to inform him what was going on. He faked concern and told me to tell Susan he'd call her soon. Whatever. I kept it short just wanting to get back to Gee. That was all a few weeks ago. There was only a week left of March now.

Now call me stupid but I've been trying to get Gerard out of the house more these past weeks. And tonight we're going to a party Hambone's throwing. Gee was excited but truth be told, I was nervous. My friends are all assholes and that last party we went to ended up in Gee crying because I was an asshole too.

“Frankie, it's almost time to leave, are you ready?” Gerard asked me, while he sat on my bed. I threw myself beside him.

“Yeah. All ready when you are.” I answered, pushing some of his black bangs behind his ear,

“Are you sure you want to go though?”

“You're the one who asked me if I wanted to go in the first place!” He laughed, his green hazel
eyes wide and bright, making my heart ache.

“I know,” I sighed, “But I didn't think you'd agree.” Gerard just rolled him eyes, then pushed himself off the bed.

“Too late now. C'mon.” He insisted, reaching out a hand for me to take. Groaning, I took his soft hand, which was off center of where it should have been.

“Fine, fine.” I sighed, “Let's go.” Making our way downstairs, I kept our fingers linked guiding Gerard into the living room where Susan and Dad were watching TV.

“You guys leaving for the party?” Susan asked. She was being surprisingly cool with me taking Gerard out. Honestly I think it was because she thought that getting him out of the house would make him feel better.

“Yeah.” I nodded, letting go of Gee's hand and slipping my converse on.

“Okay, just be safe. Have fun.” She offered with a small smile.

“We will, ma.” Gee promised, moving towards the sound of his Mom's voice on the couch. Bending down he aimed to kiss her cheek, but went in for her temple. Susan anticipated his movement however and jutted her cheek out allowing him to peck her face.

“Bye baby.” She said, patting his arm.

“Bye.” Gee smiled. I crossed the room, resting my hand on the small of his back and we quickly left out the door, echoing goodbyes back and forth. Dad was quiet but I really didn't care.

Once in the car, I turned on the radio. They were playing Nirvana's Frances Farmer Will Have
Her Revenge On Seattle. Gerard began to softly sing under his breath, tapping his fingers along his thigh to the tune. I loved his singing voice, but whenever I mentioned it he clammed up and stopped from embarrassment. And although it was adorable to see, I'd much rather hear his singing, so I kept quiet. Instead, I moved my hand to rest on his thigh, giving it a squeeze. Gee turned his head in my direction, offering a smile but kept singing to my delight. The drive wasn't long anyhow. It only took 'bout maybe fifteen minutes before I was parked around Hambone's house. There were quit a few cars parked around the house and I could already hear music from where my car sat. Great. Just what I wanted, a big fuckin party to go to. I'd much rather have just stayed home with Gee and listen to music all night. But I figured if this made him happy...well then I couldn't argue.

“You ready, Frankie?” Gerard wondered, his voice soft in the confinement of my car. I nodded, but then remembered how stupid the gesture was around Gee, so I hummed instead.

“Yeah, you sure you want to go in?” I asked leaning in towards him and cupping his face.

“Y'know we can always go back to the house and make out...” I suggested, kissing his soft lips. Gerard laughed into the kiss.

“Why can't we do both?” He smirked.

“Fine, fine.” I sighed for the second time that night. Opening our doors in unison, we jumped our, linked hands and entered the unlocked house of Hambone. I think his parents were out of town for their anniversary or some shit. Immediately upon entrance , though, we were greeted with loud music and the smell of smoke and beer. Tightening my grip on Gee's hand I lead us deeper into the house, towards the kitchen to at least get us something to drink. If we were going to stay, I couldn't be sober while doing so.

“Hey Frankie! Not so fast!” I heard Hambone, the devil himself call from behind me. Whipping my head around, sure enough the man was walking towards me and Gerard.

“Hey Hambone.” I replied, turning Gee and myself around to face him.

“I'm glad you and Gerard could make it. Man you missed out on New Years though. Shit was fucking crazy.” He proclaimed.

“Oh what a bummer.” I rolled my eyes sarcastically. I definitely was not sorry I skipped.

“Don't be such a grump Frank.” Hambone, nudged me, then turned his attention on Gerard.

“Hey, Gee you're coming to prom with us right?”

“Yeah, I am.” He smiled awkwardly. Gerard was always so shy no matter how much he go to know my band. I felt bad because I wished he'd feel more comfortable, but I'll admit it was damn adorable. I squeezed his hand in reassurance.

“Sweet!” Hambone cheered, “We're going to have the night of our fuckin lives.” Again I rolled my eyes at his enthusiasm. Before I could reply however, fuckin Hagevik came up out of nowhere and slapped a hand on Gee's back, making him jump out of his skin before he couldn't even say anything.

“Fuckin dickweed. You can't do that.” I shouted, pushing Hagevik off Gerard. “You gotta warn him.” I growled.

“Dude, fucking chill.” Hagevik laughed, raising his hands in the air, “I didn't mean to scare him.” I wasn't amused though.

“What did you think you were gonna do? He can't see! Of course you're going to scare him!” I yelled, not meaning for my voice to raise so much. But I couldn't help it, Hagevik had been on my last nerves since I figured out he liked Gerard. Hambone even agreed that he thought Hagevik has a thing for Gee.

“Frank.” Gerard murmured only loud enough for me to hear, as he gripped my elbow. I stared at Gerard, his eyes pleading. Slowly I relaxed as much as my body screamed for me to fucking knock Tim out. Relaxing my stance, Gee and I turned back to Hambone and Tim.

“Anyways.” Hagevik drawled out, making me want to wipe that idiotic grin off his face, “I was gonna ask you and Gee if you wanted to go outside and smoke with me?”

“No.” I replied immediately before Gerard could respond. Gerard turned swiftly to face me.

“What? Why?” He begged.

“Gee please. Not now. Not here.” I begged right back. Seriously I didn't want to have this conversation. I did not want Gerard high as a kite at this party. First I'd have to deal with it around a million people I didn't trust, and second of all Susan and Sarah would kill me if I brought Gerard back home stoned. Sarah and I had been getting along lately and I didn't need to push or ruin my luck.

“Don't be such a pansy.” Hagevik teased. I only continued to scowl.

“Butt out of this, Hagevik.” I sneered, turning to Gerard. “Please Gee, not now.”

“Why? If not now then when?” Gerard challenged. I sighed in frustration. Could no one just listen to me once?

“I promise.” I started, “I promise we'll smoke together. Just not at a party with a million people around. Why don't we just do it one day after school or something? We can listen to our favorite CD's and eat junk food.” I offered. Gerard pressed his lips together in a tight line, squinting his eyes at me, considering the option. If I weren't trying to convince him of something at that moment, I would have laughed at how cute he looked when he was trying to come off as threatening.

“You promise?” He demanded.

“I promise.” I vowed. Gerard exhaled roughly.

“Fine.” He caved, turning to Tim, “No thanks.”

“Man, you're such a Debbie Downer,” Tim scowled at me, but I only smiled smugly, wrapping an arm tightly around Gee's waist.

“I can live with that.” I shrugged. Tim rolled his eyes and walked away muttering 'Whatever' at us. Hambone just laughed at the whole exchange.

“Man you both better squash you're fighting before we start doing gigs again.” He commented.

“If we do gigs again.” I reminded.

“If?” Gerard wondered, concern filling his voice.

“Yeah,” I sighed, “We're taking a hiatus to finish school and stuff. No big deal. Don't worry, we'll do gigs before we know it.”

“What about that agent?” He pressed, still looking worried.

“Turns out he wasn't interested.” I brushed by.

“Why didn't you tell me?” Gee asked, hurt tracing his expression.

“Don't take it personal, baby...I dunno I guess I've just had a lot on my mind.” I tried to play off. Really I've been upset we were on a hiatus and that fucking Agent didn't like us. I was crushed. I finally thought it was going to be our big break...then college was just around the corner and me and the band members decided it was best for now to focus on school. Gee didn't look convinced though, but didn't say anything else.

“Why don't we go get some drinks, yeah?” Hambone offered, sensing the sudden tension.

“Yeah, I need one.” I groaned

“I'm just gonna go sit.” Gerard muttered.

“You sure? You want me to get you something to drink.” I asked, furrowing my brow.

“Yeah sure.” He shrugged, already making his way through the sea of people talking and
dancing. It always made me nervous when he went off on his own like that, let alone through a large crowd. Tensing I watched him go, making sure he got to the couch. Sure enough he did, feeling his way around. I knew I shouldn't be so baring but I couldn't help it.

“C'mon. He's fine.” Hambone said, nudging me. Nodding absentmindedly, I followed him into the kitchen, where we quickly got ourselves drinks. I made myself a rum and coke and Gerard a beer. We were in and out; I didn't want to linger and talk to drunk people I hardly knew and plus I didn't like leaving Gerard for long.

Making our way back into the living room, I spotted Gee. He wasn't alone though, to my distaste. He was chatting oh so comfortably with no other than Sophie. It was almost as bad as Hagevik. I knew I was overreacting, but I didn't care. Dare or not he still has kissed her. I mean it's not like I'm mad at either of them, it was just Hagevik being a prick. But still. They'd kissed each other and that was enough to make my blood boil. Crossing the room I flopped myself down next to Gee and wrapped an arm around him comfortably. I wasn't too worried about scaring him nowadays. I knew he knew what I smelled like.

“Here baby.” I said, handing him his beer while leaning in to kiss his temple.

“Thanks.” He mumbled.

“Hey, Soph.” I smiled as genuinely as I could.

“Hey Frank!” She smiled back. Sophie was a petite little thing; tiny, brown hair and big grown eyes and an olive skin tone. Always smiling and always ready to talk to someone and make them at home even if it wasn't her home to make them comfortable with. I knew taring someone's looks apart was useless, Gee couldn't see and plus he didn't care about looks, it was all connection for him. But I couldn't help myself, it was like it was engrained inside me to do so.

“Where's Neil?” I wondered, trying to sound like it was an offhanded comment.

“Floating around somewhere.” She laughed. I nodded, bringing my glass to my lips and taking a big swig.

“So what're you guys talking about?” I asked

“Oh not much. I just asked Gee how he was doing. What he did for the holidays and stuff.” Sophie shrugged. I nodded again in recognition. “Oh! And he told me he's going to prom with us!”

“Yeah, yeah. He sure is.” I smiled, tugging Gee closer toward me. He didn't say anything though but chugged his beer back.

“I'm so excited! It's going to be so much fun!” She squealed in excitement. I couldn't help but laugh at how sweet Sophie was. I suppose I should cut her some slack. “But hey, I'm going to look for Neil,” Sophie added, starting to get to her feet, “Call me Gee and we can talk about what we're going to do for prom outfits and stuff.”

“Yeah, definitely.” Gerard agreed.

“Cool.” Sophie grinned then left.

“Did you give her your number?” I wondered once she'd gone

“She gave me hers. I can type a number y'know.” Gerard scuffed, scooting away from me

“I know.” I defended, “What's wrong with you?”

“You!” He exasperated, “You're what's wrong with me. The minute we've gotten here, you've been acting like my mom. Like I don't know how to take care of myself. I'm a big boy. And Sophie! Sophie's just a friend. I've told you that a million times.”

“Calm down, Gee.” I tried, “I'm sorry OK? I'm just trying to look out for you. I worry, is that so bad?” I demanded.

“No. But back off. You need to let me make choices for myself. And trust me.” Gerard barked. I sighed heavily in frustration. No matter what, I felt like, we always ended up fighting at a party.

“HEY!” Hambone yelled, making his way towards us on the couch, obviously drunk by then. I groaned internally. “You two wanna do a drinkin game?” He slurred.

“No.” I muttered darkly, folding my arms across my chest like a child.

“Awh, Frankie.” He cooed, “Don't be like that.” while tousling my hair. Scowling I swatted his hand away.

“Hambone, I'm sick of drinking games.” I protested.

“Okay, okay.” He huffed dramatically, but dropped himself down beside Gee, sandwiching Gerard between us. “But y'gotta tell me this.” He whispered loudly, leaning in Gerard face. Gee wrinkled his nose; I could even smell his booze-breath. “Have you two fucked yet?”

“Hambone! Please!” I groaned, tilting my head back.

“What? I gotta know.” He laughed stupidly, “After seeing you guys all hot 'n bothered in the car before Christmas...A guys gotta wonder!”

“Hambone.” I warned. Gerard just sat there blushing like a goddamn firetruck, his head bowed.

“So you did then, huh? Who bottomed?” He pressed, not taking the hint.

“Hambone, I swear to fucking God, if you don't shut the fuck up!”

“Alright, alright.” He chuckled, “ I'll just have 'ta go with Gerard topping. We all know you bottomed with Bob.”

“HAMBONE!” I bellowed, swiping my hand out, but he jumped up before I could get to him. Sniggering, he backed away slowly.

“And speaking of Bob...guess who's here tonight?” He teased. Suddenly at the mention of Bob being here, caused all my anger to drain being replaced with sock. I could literately feel the blood drain from my face.

“W-What?” I stuttered. Hambone was too fuckin drunk to do anything but laugh, giggled at my obvious discomfort.

“Yup.” He said proudly, popping the P. “I invited him.”

“Why the fuck would you do that?” I squeaked

“Cause I miss Bobby. We haven't seen him in forever.” He pouted then walked off without another word. Well yeah, we haven't seen him in forever because we'd only dated and fucking broke up! God Hambone could be so stupid sometimes.

Then, you know how in movies once a character had been mention, they suddenly appear? Or one of the characters, because they then knew of the other character being present, they say them? Make sense? Well that's what happened. Once Hambone drifted off and before I could get up to try and leave my eyes caught the stare of none other than Bob fucking Bryar from across the room. Well shit. I was fucked. He knew I saw him. Smiling weakly, I offered a wave. Bob waved back with a gentle smile gracing his lips. Turning to Gerard fast, I saw he was just sitting quietly, oblivious to what was happening around him. Turning back, I saw Bob walking toward us.

“Hey, Gee? Wanna go outside for a smoke?” I asked frantically. Gerard shrugged.

“Sure.” He muttered. Standing to my feet, I helped Gee up taking his hand firmly into mine. Moving as quick as possible without looking suspicious, I guided Gee out of the crowded room of drunk people, and into the kitchen, then finally outside. The night air was cool with a slight nip to it. It was March, but it was Jersey too. The days were getting warmer but the mornings and nights still had a bite to them. Wrapping my arms around Gerard to keep him warm and close, we sat down on the grass. A few people were outside too, smoking and chatting although no where near as crowded as inside. Reaching into my back pocket, I pulled out my pack of cigarettes. Delicately I got two out, lighting them both then handing one to Gee. He took it carefully with the same hand that held his beer and pulled out a long drag, the smoke swirling into the night air.

“You're quite.” I stated setting my glass of rum and coke down on the solid ground. Gerard lifted one shoulder, letting it drop. “Are you okay?” I asked, carefully lifting a hand to caress his cheek.

“I guess.” He murmured, picking blades of grass out of their root with his free hand.

“What do you mean, you 'guess'?” I pressed. Gerard sighed.

“I mean I guess.” He repeated, “I guess I wish we could just go out to a party without fighting. Can we really only not fight if it's just the two of us? That's not how a relationship should work.”

“Gerard, we're just fine around other people. My friends are just jerks...they make me so mad sometimes...I'm sorry.” I tried to explain.

“You're friends seem fine. It's you being the jerk.” He scowled. Ouch.

“Gee, please.” I exhaled.

“What? Please what? What do you want me to do?” He demanded, his eyes narrowed. I swallowed loudly, then pulled on my cigarette for comfort.

“I don't know.” I mumbled. Gerard shook his head but said nothing. We were quite a moment not sure what to say to each other, merely smoking our lungs to death. Before long, however I heard the screen door open and shut. Flashing my eyes over to the noise, I saw Bob coming outside, scanning the crowd. Meeting my eyes, a smile quirked on his lips and he began striding over to us. I froze, not knowing what to do. I had nowhere else to run. Instead, I took Gerard's free hand into mine, gripping tight. Gerard didn't protest to my liking.

“Hey, Frank.” Bob greeted brightly, standing over Gerard and I. Tilting my head back I smiled as genuinely as I could.

“Oh, hey Bob.” I choked out.

“Mind if I smoke with you guys?” He asked, his blue eyes flickering to Gerard then back to me.

“Uh, yeah sure.” I agreed, gesturing to the ground. Lowering himself down, Bob pulled out his own pack of cigarettes and lit one up. He looked just like I remembered him. Dirty blonde hair, kinda long to his shoulder, a silver lip ring, stunning blue eyes that sparkled under the artificial glow of the porch lights, and tall and strong build. He was wearing blue jean, a Pearl Jam shirt, and a black beanie.

“So long time so see, huh Frankie?” He smiled, while simultaneously breathing out smoke as he spoke to us.

“Yeah.” I said, “So Gerard, this is Bob.” I introduced, squeezing his warm soft hand, “And Bob this is my boyfriend Gerard.” I went on gesturing towards Gee.

“Nice to meet you.” Bob offered his had out.

“You too.” Gerard answered, taking his hand out of mine and offering it out. Bob's gaze shifted on me, looking confused, but moved his hand to grasp Gerard's nonetheless. Shaking firmly, then letting go, I brought Gee in towards me protectively.

“I've heard a lot about you.” Gerard started.

“Oh have you?” Bob pressed with curiosity.

“Yeah you used to date Frank, right? You're that Bob?” Gerard wondered. I blushed in embarrassment. Bob just chuckled.

“Yeah that's me. I'm that Bob. And you are dating Frank I see?” Bob inquired.

“Unfortunately.” Gerard teased but I still frowned.

“He can be a handful can't he?” Bob agreed lightheartedly, elbowing me. I rolled my eyes, stubbing out my fag.

“You guys are hysterical.” I muttered dryly. “Neither of you are a piece of cake either.”

“Oh lighten up Frankie. We're just teasing, aren't we Gerard?” Bob smirked, casting his eyes onto him. Gerard smirked back in his direction.

“Of course.” He agreed, then took one last puff of his cig and stubbed it out.

“So how long have you guys been dating?” Bob wondered.

“Since September.” I replied, stretching the truth a smidgen. Technically it was early October but whatever. Bob didn't need the details.

“Oh wow. That's a long time.” He pointed out. Whatever Bob. I could tell he was being sarcastic. Bob and I dated barely a year. What was he? Comparing? Well last time I checked Gee and I were still dating.

“Yeah, feels longer.” Gerard mumbled, then took a swig of his beer.

“In a good way of course.” I added, pecking his cheek. Gerard nodded.

“Well I'm gonna go inside, though.” He announced, causing me to furrow my eyebrows. Gerard hauled himself up taking his drink with him.

“You want me to come?” I asked, about to get up.

“No, no. Stay and talk with Bob.” He insisted.

“Uhm, okay.” I muttered.

“I'll be fine.” He promised but I wasn't convinced. At the same time though I couldn't do anything. Gerard just told me to stay; I had no other excuse. “Come find me when you're ready.” I sighed, but said okay and Gerard left. I watched him go, forgetting Bob entirely. Clearing his throat after a moment however, I jumped in my spot.

“So?” Bob asked.

“So what?” I scoffed, fishing another cigarette out of my pack and lighting it.

“So what's up with your boyfriend?” He rephrased.

“Nothing.” I growled. I didn't give a fuck how awkward I felt around Bob right then. No one and I mean no one talked shit about Gerard in front of me.

“Wow, chill Frankie.” He laughed, raising his hands in surrender, “I'm just curious. No offense.” I scowled though.

“He's blind, if you must know.” I said through clenched teeth.

“Really?” Bob raised his blonde eyebrows, “Hmm...that makes sense.”

“Why does it makes sense?” I demanded.

“Frank, seriously. I'm just wondering. Y'know like he didn't shake my hand but put out his own and how he was never looking me in the eye, but off somewhere else.” He explained. I grunted but said nothing in response.

“Y'know he's really hot if that's any cancellation.” Bob shrugged, “I'd fuck him.”

“Bob.” I squeaked. I was suddenly remembering why I didn't like my friends and the people I used to hangout with before Gee. They were so crude. But then again so was I... “That's my boyfriend.” I reminded.

“Yeah and I'm saying he's catch.” He said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Looks aren't everything.” I pointed out sternly.

“True. But they can't hurt.” He countered. I rolled my eyes.

“What's gotten up your ass over the past couple years? Gerard's dick?” Bob suggested.

“Fuck you.” I spit. “If you must know, my dicks gotten into him.”

“Well would'ya look at that. Frank Iero topping.” Bob chuckled.

“Again. Fuck you, Bob. I've topped plenty of times after you. It's not my fault you're a top slut.” I defended, but couldn't help feel a small smile creep onto my lips.

“Pff. Whatever.” Bob rolled his blue eyes.

“It's true.” I insisted.

“And again. Whatever...So how'd you meet him anyhow?” Bob asked, thankfully changing the subject.

“I actually met him at the mall. But technically his Mom's engaged to my Dad.” I offered.

“No shit.” Bob shouted, eyes bugging.

“No shit.” I repeated.

“Isn't that weird? Like being his step-”

“Don't you fucking dare say step-brother!” I hissed, cutting him off. Bob laughed.

“Why?”

“Because he is not my fucking step-anything.” I cringed, “He's my boyfriend and that's it.”

“Alright, I get that. But how'd that happen? Did you guys date and your parents fell in love or some shit?” Bob tried to figure out. I shook my head.

“Well they'd actually been dating already, but we hadn't met yet. The day me and my Dad were going over for me to meet them, I went to the mall and met Gerard first.” I tried to explain.

“Oh, man! That's some Jerry Springer shit.” Bob sighed. I nodded.

“Tell me 'bout it.” I muttered, stubbing my third cig out.

“And he'd blind?” He restated.

“Hmm. Since he was seven.” I said bluntly.

“Is that weird?” Bob wondered curiously.

“Actually not really. I mean I had to get used to it and how I like talked to him and approached him and stuff, but I'm used to it now.” I answered truthfully.

“Well blind or not; he's hot. He's got a tight ass. Like I said before and I'll say it again; I'd fuck him.” Bob mused. I just shook my head, hearing it from Bob actually didn't bother me much.

“Yeah you and everyone else.” I scuffed.

“What'd you mean?” He wondered quirking an eyebrow.

“Fucking Hagevik. He's all over Gee and it fucking pisses me off.” I scowled just thinking about Hagevik over Gerard.

“That's Tim for you I guess. He's a creep.” Bob shrugged. I rolled my eyes in agreement.

“But what about you?” I asked, “You dating anyone?”

“Nope. Riding solo for me.” He replied nonchalantly.

“How come?” I probed.

“Just not looking for a relationship, I guess.” He explained. “But I'm glad you've got someone. I mean I don't really know Gerard or anything, but he seems like a good guy for you.” Bob offered. I smiled with genuine warmth.

“Thanks Bob.” I said, watching him take a drag. “I really love him.”

“Anytime...We should talk more. I mean we're still friends right?” He pointed out.

“Of course.” I agreed, “I guess I just have been kinda timid about seeing you again.” I
confessed truthfully. Bob tilted his head to the side.

“Why? It's been almost like two years.” He reminded.

“I know...I guess I'm just not good at relationship's let alone the after phase of a relationship.” I shrugged simply.

“Okay. I get that. But hey, don't be a stranger.” He insisted, patting my shoulder.

“I won't. I promise.” I replied with a grin. “Anyhow.” I sighed, “I'm gonna go look for Gerard. Make sure no one's trying to make a move.” I said, getting to my feet.

“Alright. See you around Frankie.” Bob waved, stubbing his fag out and pulling another out.

“See ya.” I accepted, waving back, then turned around making my way back inside. I felt surprisingly glad I'd talked to Bob after all this time. Honestly I was nervous at first, but once I'd got to talking, I realized he was just the same old Bob I knew. A great friend. Stepping back inside the house, with a smile on my face, it was drasticly warmer than inside. The air waved over me in a comforting embrace, while I moved through the kitchen and into the living room. It was sill pulsing with people. I had to scan my eyes over the crowd before I found Gerard. And when I did, the smile instantly fell of my face. Fucking Hagevik had found him, pinning back to the wall. Gee was pressed back into the wall, Hagevik towering over him, his hand on the wall. God fucking damn.

*****

I was so uncomfortable. Silently I prayed either Frankie or Sophie found me and saved me from Tim and his foul breath that was wafting over my face. He had backed me into a wall, trying to talk to me about God knows what after I'd come back in from being outside. To tell the truth I was intimidated by Bob. I mean he was my boyfriends first boyfriend and the first person he ever had sex with. He seemed nice and all but I figured I'd just let Frank catch up on his own... Bad idea. Because the second I entered the living room, Tim must have spotted me. He was trying to flirt and be seductive but it just made me sick to my stomach.

“Do we have a problem?” I heard Franks voice come from my left. I could have sung at the sound of his beautiful voice, if I weren't so nauseous from Tim's booze ridden breath.

“No. Just keepin' Gee company.” Tim slurred, thankfully turning his head away from me to talk to Frank.

“Well, thanks. But I'm back.” Frank seethed, not sounding happy.

“Aw don't be that way, Frankie. Didn't you ever learn to share?” He teased. Then I suddenly felt all Tim's body heat leave my surroundings, followed by a crack and a thump by the wall next to me. I couldn't help but flinch at the unexpected noise and vibration beside myself.

“Hagevik, I sweat to fucking God, if you don't leave Gerard alone, I will personally castrate you right here in front of everyone.” Frank practically growled next to me.

“Fine, chill Frank.” Tim's voice shook with fear. Then I heard frantic footsteps running away.

“You okay, Gee?” Franks voice softened dramatically, fluttering around me, rough hands touching my face and hair.

“Yeah, yeah. I'm okay.” I replied, my own voice wobbling. “He was just being annoying.”

“Why don't we find a room?” He suggested lowering his voice, leaning closer into me.

“Everyone being all over you makes me think I should mark you up. Let people know you're taken.” Frank continued, purring. Shivering, I could only nod at his new shift in tone. Frank didn't respond but glued his mouth onto mine, shoving his tongue in right away. I groaned into the kiss, wondering how we could be so irritated with each other one moment then practically tearing each others clothes off the next. Tangling my fingers into Frankie's long hair, he slid his hands down my back, butt, and thighs, cupping them and heaving them up to rest on his hip. Carrying me through the large amount of people we continued to make out heatedly.

I didn't really process much right then, but the feeling of being pressed against Frank and our mouths sewn together, exchanging spit and clashing tongues. Before I knew it, Frank was slamming a door behind us, with his foot. Then I was being throw onto a bed, with Frank crawling over me, attaching his mouth that time to my neck, sucking and nipping. Moaning out, I threw my head back in pleasure. Thrusting up, I began friction between us.

“Oh, Frankie.” I gasped, rubbing out crotches together. I was getting incredibility hard. “Oh Frankie, I need you.”

“I got you, baby.” He whispered against my skin, raising goosebumps. “You're all mine. Just mine. Not Tim's or Sophie's or Lindsey's. Just mine.” He ranted, kissing down my body after every name for emphasis. I could only whine and mew in response. Frank quickly started ripping our clothes off, desperate to be naked. I was getting warm, feeling a fresh coat of sweat already break through my pores. Franks callous fingertips trailing over me was almost as good as an orgasm.

“God all your noises are driving me crazy, Gee.” Frank whined. I smirked, groaning just because I loved to tease him. Growling Frank finally removed my last article of clothing, diving to lick and kiss down my exposed thigh. I opened my mouth, letting out an incredibility loud, high pitched whine. Reaching down, I clasped my fingers into his hair, tugging and pulling. Frank hummed in response, sucking on a particular part of skin.

“Frankie.” I mewled, “Frankie, c-can I ask you something.” Frank paused, letting go of my patch of flesh.

“Yeah, anything?” His voice rasped out, low and scratchy. I gulped loudly, feeling suddenly nervous to ask Frank what I'd been wanting to for awhile now.

“Uhm.” I began

“What is it baby?” He pressed, pulling his naked self up closer to my face, his warm sweet breath washing over me. It was like a breath of fresh air after smelling Tim's.

“I was j-just wondering...d-do you think that maybe I could...y'know...top?...sometime if it was okay with you. To just like try it?” I ranted out, blushing profusely, feeling stupid. Frank was quiet making me feel as if I had done the wrong thing.

“I'm sorry, Frankie. We don't ha-”

“No! No, no, no. Gee it's okay.” He reassured quickly, pecking my lips, “We can. I just didn't know you wanted to. Don't ever be afraid to ask me something. Especially like this.”

“O-okay.” I sighed, still blushing like a tomato. Frank giggled.

“You're adorable. You know that, right?” He murmured into my ear. I shivered.

“You're just buttering me up.” I accused, playfully.

“I would never.” He gasped in fake horror, making me giggle too. Frank gently kissed down my ear to my jaw then lips, silencing any noise coming out of my mouth other than a moan. Together we moved our lips together gently, the sound wet and sweet. Frank took hold of my shoulders, carefully flipping us over so I was on top. Bracing my arms out, I held myself up, hands splayed beside his head. We continued to kiss, moving our naked bodies together. This was personally my favorite part. Just being together, having our bodies move together, having them create an art form of their own. Frank pulled back after a moment though, sitting up. Confused, I sat back on my knees. I could hear rustling around from a nightstand to my right.

“I'm looking for some lube...Ah-ha!” He explained, “The nightstand never fails to have lube. I don't care where or who you are.” I smiled a lop sided grin.

“So you're gonna have to prep me...it's been awhile since I've bottomed. Or I can do it?” Frank mentioned, sounding unsure himself. It was very endearing to hear him sound nervous despite all his experience. I blushed but held my ground.

“I'll do it.” I stated firmly.

“You sure?” Frank wondered. I nodded. Frank always made me feel safe and taken care of. I wanted to do the same for him. Silently Frank handed me the lube; hesitantly I slicked up three fingers after popping the cap open.

“So...uh what should I do? I'm sorry.” I mumbled, again feeling inadequate.

“Don't be sorry.” Frank insisted, leaning up and offering me a soft lingering kiss. Once we broke apart, he took my hand, “Just do what I do.” He began, his voice low and seductive. Trailing my hand down in his, Frank brought my hand to his opening then let go. Trying to repress a bubbling moan in the back of my throat, I tentatively pushed one finger into the ring of muscles. Easily it slid in consuming my long finger. Frank moaned, making me echo him. Thrusting in and out, Frank pushed back, so I added another. Frank hissed though; I could feel him clenching the sheets beside him.

“I'm sorry.” I fluttered, about to pull back the second finger.

“It's okay. Don't stop.” He rushed out, grabbing my wrist. I eased up, nodding and continued to thrust my fingers in and out slowly. Soon enough, Frank was moaning and groaning again and pushing back, rocking to meet my hand.

“Add another.” He rasped out, sounding choked up.

“You sure?” I swallowed hard and squirmed, feeling my cock ache to be touched.

“Yeah.” Frank panted. I did as he said, adding the final and third finger. Frank moaned loud and needy, reaching out and tugging my hair.

“Frankie.” I whined, reaching down with my free hand to palm myself.

“Okay, just a second more.” He reassured. I nodded frantically, still fingering him while squeezing my dick. After another moment or so, I heard Frank pant out an okay. When I pulled all three fingers out, though I heard him let out the most sexiest whines ever.

“Mmm. Frankie, please.” I cried, I was desperate for relief.

“J-just slick yourself up baby. Then go slow.” He instructed. I nodded, sitting back again and searching for the lube. Frank, I heard though, pop open the lid, getting it before I could.

“Wh-” I started but then I felt his hand cover my cock. Groaning out almost as loud as a scream, I could have just came right there. I could heard Franks heavy breathing in my ear while he pumped me slow. When he let go, I couldn't help but whimper.

“So Goddamn hot.” He murmured, while leaning back. Suddenly I was nervous again.

“Just relax.” He purred seeing my worry. I nodded, leaning forward on my arms. Below me I could feel Frank spread his thighs apart wider. Reaching down, I grabbed my dick, trying to aim it right. Frank took hold of my wrist again, helping to guide me. Once I felt my tip brush him, I bit my bottom lip and started pushing forward. Frank let go of my wrist, laying back and gripped my shoulders, digging his nails in. Easing my way in, I went slow and precise, trying to make Frankie as comfortable as possible. Frank started rocking forward, though when I was getting close to being consumed all the way. I got the hint, thrusting all the way inside. Frank let out a pleasurable moan from the back of his throat, causing me to moan too. It was such a different sensation from bottoming. His warm tightness was making my head swim from pleasure. The muscles were constricting in all the best ways possible, almost begging for more.

“Move, baby.” Frank ordered. Complying instantly, I began to thrust at a steady pace. Burrowing my face into Franks neck, I tried to hold back all the noises my body wanted me to make. Biting his shoulder, I started sucking hoping to swallow up the sounds.

“Oh, Gee.” Frank whined, “Faster baby.” Again I gave in, picking up my pace, soon feeling as if I was pounding inside him. Frank wrapped his legs around my waist, allowing me to go in at a deeper angle. This caused Frank to practically scream.

“Oh-uh! R-Right there.” He shouted into my ear. I smirked, doing as he asked. I loved hearing
him beg for a change. Usually he was the one giving me all I wanted. There was something definitely pleasuring in itself to dominate and please your lover.

“God Frankie.” I husked out, “You feel so good. Love you so much.” I panted, feeling sweat drip down my face and jaw.

“Love you too. Can't believe how lucky I am.” He proclaimed. I didn't even know it was possible to blush while topping, but I found a way to do it, as Frank gave me the compliment.
While I kept nailing Frank's prostate dead on, he kept shouting encouragements and compliments to me. Our panting and moans filled the room, I didn't even know who owned. I didn't even know who's bed we were in but right then I didn't give a damn. I just cared about the feeling of Frank's skin against mine, moving in sync, allowing us both great pleasure.

“Gee...baby. I'm close.” Frank warned. I nodded shakily, reaching down and firmly grasping his cock. Pumping in time with my thrust, soon Frank cam in about four strokes, his hot cum shooting all over my hand. Feeling him tighten around my dick, I cam too, shooting my load inside him. Riding our orgasm's together, I felt worn out once we'd finished. Collapsing onto Frankie's chest, I felt myself lie in his cum, but I didn't care. We were both panting, trying to catch our breath, while Frank carded his fingers through my sweaty hair.

“Th-that was amazing.” Frank laughed shakily, feeling his chest move underneath me. I laughed back weakly.

“Thanks.” I breathed out, “You were pretty great too.”

Notes

I hope you all had a good holiday! Thanks for all the well wishes for the holidays too :) And holy moly! I can't believe this has 41 subscribers, like if 41 of you were sitting in my room waiting for me to update I think I would shit myself. It's very nice to think you guys like this so much...So you have like 50 more pages to read; three more chapter + epilogue...but uh... *looks down at the ground and kicks a rock*...I have a sequel to this....so yeah...
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