Me and Sierra were sitting in my room after dinner.

“You’ll be glad you did it,” Sierra kicked her feet over the edge of the chair in the corner. “It’s gonna be a lot easier than losing your shit on the stand cause you aren’t prepared.”

I knew it was supposed to sound comforting but it also hurt a bit. People were starting to rely that me breaking down was standard. Like I could argue it. “Yeah,” I mumbled back.

The phone rang in the next room. Caroline’s upbeat footsteps followed.

“So what’s up with Caroline?” Sierra asked a bit quieter.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, what’s her story?” Sierra shrugged.

“Um,” I looked towards the door and brought my voice down. “She’s Elliot’s sister. She just found out she was pregnant and her boyfriend kicked her out. Elliot’s just helping her out.”

Sierra nodded. “That makes a lot more sense now.”

“Why? What did you think she was?”

“I thought they were like… together. Confusing,” Sierra shook her head.

“No, Elliot has Duke,” I furrowed my brows and looked away.

“Yeah,” Sierra nodded. “That’s why I was confused.”

Caroline popped her head in the doorway and me and Sierra both looked at her. “Hey Gerard?” she held the phone out. “It’s Mikey.”

My heart rate spiked momentarily. I reached towards the phone. “Hello?”

“Hey,” your voice was warm.

“Hey,” was all I could say back.

“I have a question,” you whispered. The volume alone made me picture you hiding in your closet so Mom and Dad wouldn’t hear you. “Do you think Elliot would mind if I stayed over tomorrow night?”

“How?” I said back. “Mom and Dad.”

“I’ll tell them I’m at a friends. Lord knows they will jump at the idea of me hanging out with someone besides you, right?”

I smiled as if you could hear it. Maybe you could. I held the phone away. “Hey Caroline,” I called out the door.

“Yeah,” she held herself in the doorway again.

“Would it be okay if Mikey spent the night tomorrow?”

Caroline smiled. “Of course. He’s always welcome.”

I thought that was nice of her to say about someone she had never met. Elliot must have put in a good word about you. “Thanks, Caroline,” I nodded. “Yeah. It’s fine.”

“Great,” you whispered back. “How is it over there?”

“Kinda lame. Only cause Sierra is here,” I looked up to her.

“Hey!” she threw the pillow in her lap at me. “Jerk.”

“I’m kidding,” I laughed. “It’s okay. It’s not home.”

“Yeah,” you sighed. “Well, home misses you.”

I stayed silent, lacking the ability to reciprocate any emotion.

----

“Okay,” Elliot tapped his notepad with edge of his pen and I could tell he was nervous too. After you called, he wanted to practice. It was so soon. I wasn’t in the mood. But I had committed. “I’m gonna start off easy tonight.”

I looked back at Sierra sitting in the window seat of the office, hugging her knees in close. She tried her hardest to give me an inspiring smile.

I looked back to Elliot and nodded. “I’m ready,” I said with a forced confidence that I know he could see right through.

Elliot readjusted himself forward. “Do you have a brother named Michael?”

I nodded. “Yes.”

“He’s two years younger right?”

“Roughly. Two years and five months. We were always two grades apart though,” I pulled at my sleeve to stop my rambling.

“Are you close?” Elliot raised his eyebrows. “At this point the judge is gonna ask where the hell he’s going with this. He’s gonna tell him he has a point and they will let him continue.”

I licked my lips. “Yes. Always have been.” I looked at Elliot’s face twist. “Can I say that? What should I say?”

He nodded, “No. Say that.”

I nodded.

“And Michael’s the reason you got sent to Reynards?”

My hands knitted together in response.

“Don’t do that,” Elliot corrected, shaking his head.

I unfolded them and tried to relax. “No,” I answered. “I was the reason I got sent to Reynards.”

“Good,” Elliot nodded and jotted something down on his notepad. “But your parents caught you forcing yourself on him.”

I sighed. “That’s not even what happened.”

“Gerard,” Elliot rolled his eyes. “They are lawyers. They are gonna dramatize the hell out of the whole situation.”

I pursed my lips. “Yes. That’s why my parents sent me.”

“And because of the nature of your case, the Reynard’s staff decided to put you on Level 1 priority. The highest level.”

“Yes,” I said.

“If you weren’t sent to Reynards, how do you think your relationship with your brother might have progressed?”

“I…” I had never thought about that before. I could tell the truth. Tell him that me and you would have continued seeing each other. It would be so much easier than it is now. I wouldn’t be so fucked up. But I knew that wasn’t what I should say. “I would have been in trouble with my parents. I would have realized my horrible error I made.”

“At this point, they are gonna give some condescending look as if whatever answer you said was bullshit. So how are you and your brother now?”

I felt my teeth nash together. “We are fine. We have worked through some problems but we are fine.”

“Would you say Reynards helped you make amends with your brother?”

“No. Reynards made me scared of my brother for a long time. Taught me to stay far away from him. Wouldn’t let me talk or write about him. Coming home was a very hard transition because of Reynards.”

“Good.”