Dear diary...

Alex's P.O.V.:
"Hey, Lynz I just got to London"
"How are things over there? Are you okay?"
"Yeah I'm fine, look I do t know if Frank's at our house but if you can can either you or Gerrard drop by from time to time? Please?"
"Sure I'll ask Gerard, we were talking today and we want Bandit to know London so we're probably going to be there I about a month or so, okay?"
"That sounds great, I'm on vacation here. I told the guys and said tour was off due to a tornado in the south so..."
"Okay, look Bandit's got a doctor appointment I'll call you or IM you"
"Hey, please don't tell Frank where I am, please."
"Sure think, Alex, take care of yourself and that beautiful baby"
After Lynz hung up I felt more relaxed, being by myself in the favourite place in the world was certainly relaxing. I wasn't ready toco front Frank and the divorce papers. I hadn't talked to him nor seen him in about two weeks. He wasn't coming home anymore. When I left I took most of my clothes, art supplies and guitar with me. I thought about going to Paris with my parents or even Cairo with my grandparents but I needed time for myself.

(1 month later)

Frank's P.O.V.:
It had been more than a month since I last saw Alex. No one wanted to talk to me, not the guys, nor my family only Stephanie. I had been avoiding her calls ever since Alex found out. I missed her, after a couple of weeks living in my mothers house I went to our house, it was empty. Her clothes, art supplies and one of her guitar were gone, she'd taken them with her. I walked around the house like a ghost, I imagined her being there happy like we were before all of this happened. I felt very lonely. My parents were very upset at me because a news reporter heard about the discussion that day and found out I had cheated on her and that she was carrying my baby.
I went into our bedroom and ordered Chinese food, turned the TV on and had it I. The background while I thought of a way to mend my mistakes. I wasn't hungry at all but I needed to eat something, I had been smoking cigarettes for four days straight. No water or food.
I walked around our closet, her side was completely empty. I looked closely in her shoe cabinet and saw a stack of letter tied up with a black ribbon on them. I grabbed them and opened them. They were letters, to me. She had written them while she had those depression episodes. She wrote one to me the same night I had slept with Stephanie, I wasn't strong enough to read them. I went back In he room and googled her name. She'd been spotted in London buying baby clothes in a fancy shop. I took a shower, packed clothing for a couple of days, looked for my passport, keys and credit card. I walked to the street and got in a cab.
__________________________________
The flight from a Jersey to London was pretty long, or at least I felt like it. I walked out of the airport trying to be cool, I didn't need any more attention to myself. If Alex found out I was here she would probably leave or refuse to talk to me. I took a cab to the hotel, I hadn't been in London in so long. We played here a few times, I didn't know much of the city but I was still determined to find her. The cab left me in the hotel, I wandered around a couple of times thinking of how I would find her, no one would tell where she is. I thought about calling Lynz but she was even more upset than Gerard. My thoughts were interrupted by the hotel receptionist.
"Hello, welcome to The Ritz Carlton, may I help you?"
"Yeah, I'd like to stay for a few days"
"Okay sir, may I have your passport and credit card please?"
I handed her my documents and looked around thinking of a possible plan to find her.
"Sir, are you staying here by yourself or are you with your wife"
"I'm by... Myself"
"Your room is on the eighth floor, here are your keys, passport and credit card. The gentlemen over there will help you with your luggage, have a nice stay"
"Okay, thanks" I smiled back to her, two kind gentlemen approached me and guided me to my room.
While in my room I went to the balcony and that's where it hit me.

Alex's P.O.V.:
I had been in London for almost a month, it had been a nice relaxing month. I had started painting a few pieces and getting to know the city. I went shopping for generic stuff, I still didn't know the sex of the baby. I didn't think it was fair to Frank that only I knew and he didn't. This time by myself made me miss him, there was no one there to help me with morning sickness or soar feet, I felt lonely without him and... Well he was the dad after all. I was ready to forgive him, although I wasn't over the image of him and Stephanie doing it. I got to the hotel after I went to meet up with some friends for breakfast. I greeted the doorman while he opened the door for me and asked me how the baby was. I was definitely showing now, my bump grew a bit everyday and besides that press had found out about my presence here.
I called the elevator and got it, I browsed my phone and saw a few messages from Gerard telling me they were going to start touring in 3 months, just before the baby's due date. The elevator door opened but I noticed it wasn't my floor.
"What are you doing here?"
"Wait, don't leave. I came here to talk to you."
"Frank, please, I don't think it's a good idea"
"Alex, give me a few minutes of your day please."
"If I say yes will you leave afterwards?"
"Yes."
We went to my room and sat in the living room. He sat next to me, he was wearing a black coat and a cardigan with little skulls on them, so emo.
"Okay, Frank, talk"
"Look, Alex, I know I messed up but I miss you and I want to have a family with you. Okay, if you want we can get a divorce but I want our baby to have a father, I love you both. I'm sorry, I wasn't even thinking straight and felt overwhelmed. You are the most important thing in my life, I'm really sorry I messed up but please don't make our baby suffer"
"Before you go on I need to ask you something. Did you even wear a condom that night?"
"I did, it wasn't useful though. I was pretty drunk, I couldn't even stand up strait. I wasn't able to perform"
"Okay, well what now?"
"Are we good?"
"I'll think about it, I... Well I was wondering if you wanted to go to the doctor with me and find out the sex of the baby"
He hugged me, pressed his head on my chest and put his hands on my belly.
"I'd love to"
"You're a weird little man, did you know that?"
"You haven't called me like that ever since-"
"We got engaged, yeah. I love you Frank. Why did you have to fuck things up? Literally..."
"I'm an is idiot Alex, I'm sorry. I really am, this past month without you was awful, I missed you"
"I missed you too..."
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While in the doctor's office I saw him pace around nervously from one side of the room to the other.
"Frank, relax, the baby's fine"
"I know but, today we're finding out if we're having a boy or a girl and it's huge. Wait a minute... If you didn't know the sex of the baby how did you go shopping?"
"How do you know I went shopping?"
"You were in the cover of a British magazine"
"Oh, well, I bought only generic stuff and white stuff"
"So our baby's gonna look lik-"
He got interrupted by both a doctor and a nurse. She approached me and put some gel in my belly while the doctor strapped on a couple of gloves.
"Mr. And Mrs. Iero, right?"
"Yes" said Frank nervously as he grabbed my left hand with both of his.
"Okay so, let's see how you're doing, Mrs. Iero"
The room wen silent of a couple of minutes until we heard the baby's heart beat. Frank squeezed my hand and smiled while looking at the screen.
"Congratulations, your baby is healthy and having normal growth. Also, would you like to know the sex?"
"Yes, please, doctor"
"You're having a girl"
"A GIRL?! Alex! Oh my god, YES, FUCK YES!"
Both the nurse and the doctor laughed at his reaction, he looked like one of those video game characters in which it jumps from side to side when he achieves something. The nurse cleaned the jelly off my stomach and left along with the doctor.
"I'll leave you two alone, here are your baby pictures. I hope to see you soon Mrs. Iero."
Frank looked at me and smiled, the same way he did when we got married. He was truly happy.
He kneeled towards my belly and pressed his head towards it. I felt tears rolling down his face, wetting my stomach.
"I'll take good care of you, I'll never let you down or your mommy"

Notes

ill correct any mistakes later, tried to update ASAP. Running late for a meeting.

hope you like it,



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