Snap shot

Franks pov

I laid on my bed not sure what to do. I didn't even go to school I was so confused. I told Jamia I was sick when she came to wake me up for school and she bought it even though I wasn't sick just panicking internally.

i mean...
I kissed gerard.
I got paid for kissing gerard.
he unbuttoned my pants
he looked like he was dying with his shirt off
I may end up on a porn site
I liked kissing gerard.

My mind was in complete shreds. gerard said we weren't going to talk about what happened ever but I need to know. I need to know if he felt what I felt when we kissed.

i mean he was being paid to kiss me but I felt it, I felt something as soon as his lips touched mine...I felt loved.
I loved the feeling of kissing him even though it was dirty and in front of a camera. I still felt loved, and I've never felt that before when I've kissed other people.

I was worried that gerard would keep to his word and never bring up the shoot again because I really did want to talk to him about it.

I grabbed the envelope I had been given last night from the photographer and opened it. I began counting all the money and ended up with a total of five hundred seventy five dollars.

holy shit. That's a lot of money for some shirtless pictures, gerard must get paid a lot when he's naked. I felt bad that he was doing it to himself though, just putting his body on display for old perverts and horny teenage boys.

I knew I was going to regret it but I grabbed my laptop and began searching.
'tall thin black haired gay twink'

I felt creepy trying to find Gerard on the internet but I was curious as to just how far he'd gone to make this money. From what I knew the ways were a fucking wealthy family and I couldn't understand what gerard would need all the money for.

A bunch of random people popped up but then one caught my eye. It was gerard on a chair naked but he had his hands between his legs and he was leaning forward so you couldn't see anything. I wasn't going to lie and say it wasn't hot because it was but I also felt really bad that someone or something had pushed him to do this.

My phone buzzed and I shut my laptop going to read the text.

From mikey: bro where the fuck are you?

i texted him back with a quick messgae
-home didn't feel like going in.

My phone buzzed again quickly after signaling another text from mikey
-come to mine, it'll just be me and you if that's cool I'm bored and wasn't going to math class

i laughed that he just ditches math randomly because he feels like it but I agreed to meet him at his place hoping to get my mind off things

---------------

"what up fucker?" Mikey smiled as he answered the door

"nothin much just hanging out with an ass until something better to do comes up." I joked

"ouch." Mikey laughed.

"I'm joking I'm joking." I defended "so what do you wanna do?"

"Got any weed?" He asked me.

"No sorry man."

"Dammit I was hoping you would. I finished all mine and I need to buy more." Mikey said then began looking around the room like he was thinking.

"Here come on." He said grabbing my arm and dragging me into the basement or aka Gerard's room.

"Mikey why are we going to your brothers room?"

"Because he probably has something we can smoke or do shit with. Just help me look he's not very good at hiding things."

Oh if only you knew what he did for a living.

I began digging through Gerard's stuff hoping to find some weed or something so we could get out of there as soon as possible. I couldn't find anything in his dresser so I moved to his nightstand while mikey dug through the desk.

I was on the second drawer when I stopped digging and began looking at what was infront of me. The drawer was a bunch of junk but a few things caught my eye.

There were multiple pill bottles scattered around and a few lighters but two things really shocked me.

There were pictures in the drawer of gerard with another person at multiple places. They all looked like pictures of the two on dates but the weird thing was that the other persons face was burned out of every picture.

the second thing that caught my eye was a retainer case that must've popped open when I was digging because I doubt gerard would leave it open considering what's in it.

In the black case they're were multiple blades of different sizes and shapes. Some were thin and smal like from a razor and some looked like they from x-acto knives

"hey what'd you find-oh shit he still has these?" Mikey said picking up the pictures not noticing the blades.

"why are the faces burned out?" I asked

"It's gees old boyfriend he probably got mad when they broke up and did that. Fucking fag." Mikey mumbled

"Why do you always treat your brother like shit?" I asked instantly regretting it.

"He's an ass who does absolutely nothing but screams and whines whenever Bert is brought up."

"Who's Bert?" I asked

"Long story that doesn't matter- oh fuck man are those blades." Mikey said staring wide eyed at the retainer case.

I nodded waiting to see Mikey's reaction. "He still cuts himself, Jesus Christ it's been like two years and he still does it. What the fuck, why doesn't he just move on." Mikey said shaking his head.

I had no idea what mikey was talking about but I decided not to question it. When mikey ran into the bathroom to piss I grabbed the case with all the blades and threw it in my pocket.

I didnt want gerard hurting himself anymore. I know it was only one kiss but I feel something for him and don't want him to hurt anymore. He'll be mad they're gone but it's for his own good.

mikey came back out and seemed disappointed that we hadn't found any drugs. "Like the dude doesn't even have fucking porn what kind of older brother is that?" Mikey asked out loud.

I was going to respond but then I heard the footsteps on the stairs and I froze along with mikey.

"why the fuck are you two in my room?"

Notes

Sorry for the delays I've been in the hospital all week cause I fucked up my shoulder at practice and it sucks. Has anyone else here torn their rotation cuff?

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