You're Beautiful To Me

Breakfast passes awkwardly, the kids attempting conversation but I just don't have it in me to join in right now so I remain silent, letting them talk around me but they fall silent too, the only sounds in the room are us eating. Once we're all done Anna takes Miles' hand and leads him from the room, leaving me alone again and I try Franks number one more time before I sit the phone aside and decide to focus on clearing the dishes. Once the kitchen is tidy I head down the hallway to see what the kids are up to and when I reach Anna's door I hear Miles' voice say "It's my fault." I swallow down the lump in my throat before opening the door and I find Anna and Miles sitting on the bed, Miles curled into Anna's side as she hugs him close, a small whimper escaping him. "It's not your fault baby, it's mine" I say softly and they both pull apart to look up at me, Miles' eyes red and swollen and I walk over and sit on the edge of the bed, both Anna and Miles sliding over to curl into my sides. We sit in silence for a few minutes, just cuddled up together before I open my mouth to say "I want you guys to know that no matter what happens dad and I love you guys very very much and whatever happens between me and dad it's not your guys fault."

Later that afternoon Anna has gone to a friends house and I am laying on the couch half asleep, trying to focus on the movie playing on the tv but my eyes are closing for longer and longer each time. I glance over to the other couch where Miles is sprawled out, his chest rising and falling steadily as he naps and I feel relief at seeing him so peaceful for a change. I turn my head to focus on the tv again when the sound of the front door opening startles me and I push myself to half sit up, glancing over at the doorway and I see Frank walk past slowly, glancing in to the living room but when he sees me he frowns and keeps walking down the hallway. I sigh softly as I push myself up to sit fully, taking a deep breath before standing and making my way to the bedroom where Frank is laying on the bed staring at the ceiling. "Babe" I say softly, his head tilting in my direction and I see the side of his face is still swollen. "I didn't mean to...." I start but he cuts me off to say "I can't do this anymore Gerard. This isn't what I signed up for when I became a husband and a father. I can't handle it anymore" and I feel my heart shatter, the room starting to spin before it goes dark around the edges and I feel like I'm falling, everything going black.

Notes

Short chapter but I felt like this was an appropriate place to end it