I'm Not Okay

I stared at them shocked. “W-what? No, you’re lying. They’re locked up. They CAN’T get to me.” I wasn’t sure if at that point I was trying to reassure myself or not. All I knew was that I wished this wasn’t true. That it was an awful continuation of the dream that I had a couple nights before, I couldn’t deal with them being back. My body and mind couldn’t take it. Not again. I barely survived the first time I know I wouldn’t survive the second time. (A/N foreshadowing…or not. Hmmm guess you’ll have to wait and see) I had a scared look in my eyes and was shaking a little.

“Gerard…” Patrick murmured softly. “I’m so sorry. But it’s true. They’re out and they’re-“

“NO!” I shouted. “You’re wrong. They aren’t after me. They’re still locked up. They can’t get to me.” I screamed at him and held my head shaking it back and forth with my whole body shaking. They were wrong. They weren’t after me. Nothing was. I was safe. I could feel myself start to freak out. But nothing I did calmed me down.

I felt a hand on me and I screamed and hit that hand away from me. I was shaking so much more now.

“Gerard,” Patrick whispered. “It’s me. I’m not going to hurt you. I’d never hurt you.” I wouldn’t listen. What he was saying wouldn’t comprehend in my mind. All I heard in my mind was “im…going to hurt you.” I started to freak out there and screaming and wouldn’t let anyone touch me. I couldn’t handle this anymore. I couldn’t handle being around people.

*Pete’s POV* (A/N hope you enjoy the POV change :3)

When Gerard hit Patrick I knew something was wrong. Actually I knew something was wrong when he started to shake and scream. I knew Gerard. And I knew that he was stronger than this. He wouldn’t let his emotions get to him. But Gerard wasn’t calming down. In fact he was getting worse more hysterically. The noises he was making were breaking my heart. It was a combination between a sob and a scream.

I looked at Patrick scared and unsure what to do. He had such a heartbroken look on his face and a few tears tracing a path down his face. I reached over and gently wiped the tears away. He glanced up at me and I looked in his eyes and my heart broken. There was such a look of sorrow and sadness in them that I knew we had to get this boy safe otherwise it would break Patrick. I leaned close to his ear and whispered.

“Is there anything we can do, to calm he down?” I asked while watching the black haired boy shake and whimper some more.

Patrick nodded. “Yeah…we need to get him some sleeping pills and he needs to take them. He needs to be calm or else he’s going to end right back in the hospital. But we need someone he trusts to give them to him.”

We glanced at each other and said the person’s name at the same time.

“Frank.”

*Frank’s POV* (A/N woah! More surprise POVs!)

I was sitting on the couch in the Way’s house watching TV. Saying I was watching TV would be putting it a bit strong. I was more staring at the screen and not comprehending what ws going on.

I came over as soon as I heard that those evil bastards were out. I had every plan on staying here with Gerard so they wouldn’t do anything. I don’t know how much help I’ll be but I will try my god damn hardest to protect my dark haired angel from this sick and twisted sickos. I was about to turn off the TV when Pete and Patrick walked up from the basement and stood in front of me. I looked up at them confused.

“Um…yes?”

Patrick was ringing his hands out and looking at the ground nervously. Pete had has hand on Patrick’s lower back and was the one who spoke.

“Well you see…Patrick and I told Gerard about his uncle and dad…”

“You did what!?” I shouted jumping up. “We agreed to wait until he was better! He isn’t better!”

Pete sighed. “We KNOW Frank. We learned that. He’s currently freaking out downstairs and wont let anyone touch him and we need him to calm down before he hurts himself. Now that’s where you come in.”

I looked at them unsure. “How..? If you want me to hurt Gerard…” I didn’t have to finish my sentence for them to know.

“No of course not. We would never hurt him.” Patrick spoke up. By now he had calmed down. “We need to calm him down and the only way we could think of was to give him sleeping pills and since no one can go near him we figured you would be able to give them to him and have him calm down.”

I stared at them. “So, let me get this straight. You want me to use my relationship with Gerard and how he can trust me to drug him to calm him down?”

“Basically,” Pete replied. I rolled my eyes, real nice Wentz. Patrick hit him in the arm.

“NO. We want you to use your relationship to calm Gerard down so he wont hurt himself.”

I shrugged. “Yeah, I’ll do it.”

Patrick smiled and handed me two capsules of Benzodiazepines. I raised my eyebrow at that.

“We want him to stay asleep for awhile and it’s the only one I had with me. Oh, and when he wakes up he’ll feel really groggy and wont really remember what happened but it will come back so make sure you’re there when it happens.” Patrick informed me.

I nodded and walked downstairs to the basement and sat on the bed next to Gerard. He was still curled up into a ball and it honestly broke my heart seeing him like this. I wanted him to be his happy and smiling self that he was before. I sighed softly. Well here goes nothing, I thought to myself.

*Gerard’s POV* (A/N I swear this is the last POV switch. So sorry if it confused you)

I felt someone’s weight next to me on the bed. I lifted my head slighty scared but calmed down when I saw it was just my Frankie. I opened my arms and made grabby hands for him. He chuckled but shook his head.

“Not yet Gee, I need you to do something for me.”

I frowned, I didn’t want to do anything. I just wanted to cuddle.

He smiled and showed me some pills. My eyes widened and I went to smack them out of his hand but he moved his hand before I got a chance to.

“No baby, these won’t hurt you. They’re too help you. You need to calm down and these will help you. Will you please take them?” He asked pouting cutely at me.

I shook my head, I’ve heard that one before. They would drug me saying it was to help me when in reality it was the date rape drug and would then rape me. My breathing started to get faster when I was thinking about what happened to me in the past. I started to shake and gasp for breath. Frankier tried to comfort me but I thrashed around in his grasp trying to break free but he wouldn’t give him.

“PETE! PATRICK!” He shouted. I heard two pairs of feet running down the stairs and then Pete and Patrick were by my side. They noticed what was going on and held me down. I was sobbing uncontrollably now and still trying to break free but they increased their weight on my arms.

Frank got on my and straddled me. He had the pills in his hand. I clamped my mouth shut and wouldn’t open it.

“Oh come on Gerard, don’t be like that.” Frank muttered to me. I just stared at him. and he sighed. “I really didn’t want to do this…” I looked at him confused. But instead of answering, he leaned close to me and pinched my nose closed so I couldn’t breathe. I looked at him scared. He just looked at me sad and murmured. “I’m sorry…”

I couldn’t breathe so I had to reluctantly open my mouth gasping for air. But when I did Frank shoved the pills in my mouth. When I was going to spit them out he covered my mouth with his hand and started to message my throat.

“Come on Gee…swallow the pills.” He cooed softly at me. I had no choice and I swallowed the pills. They left a weird taste in my mouth so I screwed up my face. Frank looked up at Patrick.

“How long till they take affect?”

“Um…maybe 5 minutes,” he replied. But I was already starting to feel the affect. I stopped fighting Patrick and pete and my body was going numb. I tried hard to keep my eye lids open. I could feel my body slowly starting to shut down. MY heart rate was slowing down. But I willed my eyelids to stay open. Pete and Patrick both got off me and stood on either side of my bed. Frank leaned down and ran his hand through my hair.

“Come one baby…don’t fight it…this is good for you…” He cooed down at me. I could faintly hear him but it sounded like more like an echo. He also looked like a blurry shape. I finally let my eyes close and my body be taken into the void of sleep. My last coherent thought was I hate you Frank Iero. Before i let sleep take me into his grasp.

Notes

Maybe i made Gerard overreact just a TAD too much. But i don't have school tomorrow so i'm updating this at 2 am. Yay for snow days xD

This was 5 pages long on microsoft and over 1,000 words o.o

Enjoy this update! I would really love some feedback thanks :)