Dig It

I got out of Mikey class alone that's all I wanted, to be alone I walked passed the toilets it was tapped off and a sign on the door saying "keep out" I looked around for any teachers there were none I push open the door it stunk of blood and urine I covered my mouth to the sight there was smeared blood of the wall and floor some sleeping pills lay there in a small pile I felt my eyes get hot and tears ran down my cheeks I looked in the bathroom stall Gerard was sitting near I saw his back and a knife next to it I picked up the pocket knife and slipped it in my back pocket my hands were shaking so bad I picked up Gerard bag as I did no a note feel out "Frankie" was scribbled on the top of it I opened it nervous with what he had to say.
"Frankie,
im sorry for not telling I couldn't bring myself to he just kept screaming and hitting I had to do this to stop the hitting I'll miss you and I promise I'll look after you in heaven I'll watch over you every day even if you hate me I'll never leave your side I love you so much to the point where I imagined us being married and having kids but why would you want kids with someone so fucked I love you but you can do it without me"
"oh Gerard" I whispered crying I screwed up the piece of paper and threw is bag over my shoulder I couldn't help but think of what he had said in the letter never actually explained why he did it I frowned in confusion and walked out of the bathroom out of the school and to the hospital.

I got got to the hospital and went to the front desk.
"What room if Gerard Way in please?" I asked
a lady with blonde hair tied in a bun and glasses looked up and smiled
"he's in room 535 sir" I nodded and went to his room it was on the 3rd floor in the suicide unit I walked down the gloomy corridor all I could here was beeping slight groaning or sobs or screams it was scary to be in such a place to be, I found Gerard's room I looked into the dim room, a beep kept running through the room, Gerard's breathing was louder because of the machine anger and sadness ran through me all at once I opened the door slowly and closed it again I sat on the old ripped blue fabric covered chair and stared at him a large tube on his mouth helping him breath needles stuck in him from five different angles I took a deep breath and closed my eyes letting a few tears fun down my face.
"Why Gerard?"
*no answer*
" I told you over and over that you're perfect, that I love you, that I'm sorry for all the fucking shit I did to you, now I'm questioning if you actually love me like you said in the bullshit letter, I loved you since I first met you now when you were a dude but when you were girl too you were gorgeous fuck" I spoke I knew I wasn't getting a answer I buried my face in my hand and ran them through my hair.
"Yano what Gerard I was thinking the same thing about marriage that is be with you forever but you lied to me and don't have the curtsy to tell me instead you put your life on the line, you're so unique and beautiful yet you don't see it! Mikey is a fucking mess I don't know about you're mom, I just- just tell me why" my voice broke as I started to sob I got up and walked over to Gerard's lifeless body to be honest it didn't look like he was gunna make it I kissed his forehead and turned to the door "I'll miss you baby" I sniffed and walked out the door, next time I'll see him is at his funeral that's if he has one.

Notes

Special thank you to @fangoria without them I wouldn't have been able to write this chapter and the next that's gunna come up it's all planned and i think you'll like it!!!!

thanks you so much ily!

Rate/sub and comments what you think!

Until next time xoxo