I slid my arm out from underneath Gerard and climbed from the bed, my back popping as I stretched before I left the room. James was hunched up on the sofa, a piece of folded and creased paper clutched in his fingers, shaking slightly as he sobbed silently. “What’s wrong?” I asked as I dropped onto the couch next to him, my head resting on his shoulder while I waited for a reply. “James?”
“They won’t let me keep you.” James whispered, his voice barely above a whisper. “They want to take you away because I can’t look after you apparently.”
“I’m not going back to that place, not when all the care homes are too far away for me to see you or Gerard.”
“Frank, you don’t have a choice. Since John did what he did, they think I’m a risk to you and I might hurt you. They think I might be like John.” James sighed.
“I am not going back there goddamnit! That place was so bad. I hated it there, it… it made me want to die and they want to send me back? What kind of fucked up people are they? I can’t leave you or Gerard. I can’t leave, James. I can’t!” I yelled as I climbed to my feet and started pacing the living room. “I just… Why are they taking everyone away that I love?” I whispered, choking back a sob.
“They aren’t Frank, you’d still be able to see Gerard, you just can’t live with me.” James muttered.
“I am so goddamn sorry but they can go and fuck themselves because I’m not leaving you!” I slid my back down the wall until I was sat on the floor, ignoring the blood staining my shirt, sobs breaking free from my chest.
“Frank…” James began, touching my shoulder gently as he tried to get me to look at him. “Frank, I will fight to keep you here, I really will. Now, let’s get you cleaned up, hey?”

I nodded as James helped me to my feet, gasping when blood dripped down my side. “This is too much blood for that cut, what have you done Frankie?” James asked as he carefully peeled the shirt away from my skin.
“I’m sorry…” I whimpered as James peeled away the dressing and cleared up what he could see.
“Frank.” James said sternly.
“I couldn’t do it anymore alright! I just… I had to feel the blade again.” I whispered. “Please don’t hate me.”
“Frank, I could never hate you. Just… try not to cut yourself anymore. It won’t help anything when I try to explain why I’m stable enough to keep you here.” James paused as he dressed the slices on my ribs. “Fuck, Frank, I’m starting to love you like you are my own son. You mean the world to me and I would hate for anything to happen to you.”
“Thank you.” I whispered as I accepted the clean shirt and tugged it over my head.

“Frank!” James called as I turned to leave the room. “Gerard loves you too you know. He may not show it all the time, but he does, so maybe it’s time to open up and tell him the whole truth?” I hesitated before nodding, my feet leading me away from the room.

---

I stood outside the cemetery gates, my hands shaking as I thought of what I was going to do. Visiting their graves hasn’t been something I would willingly do. I would have to be dragged here, but with Gerard by my side, his fingers tangled in mine, I felt safe, like nothing could hurt me.

Gerard coughed gently, his eyes on me as he tried to pull me from my daydream. “You sure about this Frankie?” He asked, his arms wrapping around my shoulders as I fought back the tears.
“Yeah, just… give me a second.” I whispered as I wiped the tears from under my eyes.
“Just give me a shout.” Gerard replied as he leant against the wall, my head on his chest as I tried to compose myself.

“You can’t make me go in there!” I yelled, kicking out at the doctor that brought me here. “Please! Don’t.” I begged.
“Frank, you have to.” He said, his voice even as he struggled with my flailing arms. “It will help you get better.”
“It won’t! If I don’t see the graves then they aren’t dead and that means they can come back. I can’t… Liam can’t be dead…” I sobbed, sagging back against the wall.
“Frank, I promise it will help the nightmares stop, you’ll stop seeing whoever this Alex is if you just go to their graves.”
“I DON’T WANT TO!” I yelled as loud as a 15 year old could, my throat seizing with the effort. “I can’t go in there because that means they are actually dead which means I’m all alone and it’s all my fault and I don’t want that and I’m scared.”
“Please, for us. I promise you don’t have to stay long, just go and say goodbye, Frank.”

I sighed and relaxed in the doctors grasp, allowing him to drag me to their graves, their names inscribed on the cold stone causing sobs to break free from my chest. “I’m sorry mommy.” I sobbed. “I didn’t mean to let him get you or daddy or Liam. I’m so so sorry.”
“Frank, let it all out, say goodbye to them and you can move on.”

“Frank...Frank…. Frankie, baby look at me.” Gerard asked, his hands either side of my face, his thumbs brushing away the tears as they leaked down my face. “We don’t have to do this Frank, not if you don’t want to.”
“Its only right to say goodbye to Alex as well.” I whispered as I tiptoed and gently pressed my lips to Gerard’s. “Now, come on before I chicken out.” He nodded and held my hand as I lead him down the familiar path to my parents graves, turning off just before to stop at Alex’s.

I felt my back shudder as I fought to keep from sobbing, my sides aching as I kept in the tears. Gerard reached out, his hands gingerly clinging at my sides, his breathing heavy as he realized how much pain I was in. “I hate you.” I hissed towards the headstone. “I fucking hate you Alex. You tore my life apart, you killed my family and forced me to move into a care home. You fucking slaughtered my little brother and my parents and I fucking hate you for it.” I took a deep breath and leant back into Gerard’s arms. “But then I can’t help but love you. What you did may have been cruel and twisted and fucked up and just fucking sadistic, but it made me meet Gerard and I don’t know what I would do without him because he is my world now and I swear to god Alex, if you let any harm come to him, I will bring you back to life just so I can kill you myself. You understand?”

Gerard slipped his arms all the way around my waist, his head on my shoulder as he sniffled, tears landing on my t-shirt. “And I promise Alex, I will fucking ruin you if he gets hurt.” I promised as I turned on my heels, grabbing Gerard’s hand and dragging him from the graveyard. “I wanna…” I whispered as I gestured to the back seat, my breath hitching in my throat as Gerard froze, his face going pale. “We don’t have to, not if you’re not ready…”
“No!” Gerard pretty much yelled. “I am, but… come on Frank, a back seat? I will not make love to you in a fucking car.”
“Well then fuck me, don’t be gentle.” I stated, going red when Gerard began spluttering.
“Frank…” Gerard began.
“Shhh.” I protested as I placed my finger on his lips. “I don’t give a shit, I just want you in me.”
“Frank…” Gerard tried to argue, my lips meeting his stopping any arguments before they could begin.

I tangled my hands in his hair as he fumbled for the car keys, pressing the button that would unlock it, pressing me against the cold metal with his hips as he tugged the door open. Gerard lay me down on the backseat and closed the door, his lips meeting mine again, his hands running over my torso. “We can’t.” He panted as his hand rested on my crotch.
“I can. I promise.” I panted, leaning up to capture his lips again. “I asked James earlier. Please Gerard.” I begged, tangling my fingers in his hair as he relented, his hand deftly pulling down my zipper and palming me through my underwear. I moaned into the kiss, my hands brushing down Gerard’s sides as I ground my hips upwards.

I felt Gerard slide my pants down, his fingertips lingering on the inside of my thigh. He lowered his head and gently kissed the skin just above the hem of my boxers, his breath moving the tiny hairs. He nipped the skin softly, my back arching at the contact. “God Gee!” I panted, my hands reaching down to tangle in his hair as he pulled my boxers down with his teeth. He grinned as he slid up my body to place his lips to mine, his hands sliding between us.

“I love you Frankie.” Gerard whispered as he captured my lips again, guiding my hand down to his pants so I could feel how hard he was.
“Lets get you out of those.” I growled as I tugged them down, underwear with them. I grabbed hold of him and guided him towards my entrance, wincing slightly as he pushed up against me.
“Does it hurt?” Gerard muttered against my lips. I bit my tongue and shook my head, pressing my hips down lightly, begging him to keep going, a moan leaving me as Gerard started pumping me, distracting me as he pushed the rest of the way in, his lips pressed against mine as he pulled out slightly before slamming his hips into mine, biting my bottom lip softly as I moaned.

“Harder.” I panted as my nails dug half moons into Gerard’s hips, Gerard thrust harder as he sucked on the skin of my neck, bursting hundreds of the tiny capillaries below the surface, marking me as his own. My hips thrust upwards to meet Gerard’s, our breathing coming in rapid pants as my stomach knotted, my hands tangled in Gerard’s hair, moaning as I encouraged him to go faster, bucking my hips to meet Gerard halfway.

He angled my hips to allow better access, his breathing coming faster as he thrust harder, his lips leaving mine to trace lightly down my neck before meeting my lips again, his tongue swiping my lips ring as he kissed me roughly, my stomach clenching as I came close. “Gerard, I’m gonna… I’m gonna cum.” I panted, moaning when I released, my breathing heavy as Gerard came after, collapsing gently next to me and wrapping his arms around my waist.
“I love you so fucking much Frank Iero.” He breathed, his lips inches from mine.
“I love you too Gerard Way.” I replied as I snuggled down into his arms, sitting upright when a branch hit the window. “We better go home.” I whispered, leaning down to press my lips to Gerard’s.

Notes

Sorry it's short...... but have some smut.....smut always makes it better right??