I slid to the floor outside the building, tears streaking down my face, my shoulders shaking as I tried to fight back the sobs. There was nothing inside me that wanted to break up with Frank, but I had to. He kept telling me to. The biggest issue was how much I loved him and knowing that nothing would come of it, that I did what I did to protect him.

After I had calmed myself down, I climbed to my feet, tears still streaming down my face as I pulled my bag onto my shoulder. I threw one last look at the school before heading towards the exit, my breathing heavy as I thought of Frank.

"Gerard!" Frank yelled.
"Go away Frank." I called back, refusing to face him.
"No, you need to listen to me Gerard and I won't go away until you do!" Frank shouted, the anger and pain causing me to turn to him. My jaw dropped slightly at the sight of blood on his hands, tears streaming from his eyes as he stood in front of me.
"What do you want Frank?" I muttered, my eyes on the floor.
"You can try and make me hate you Gerard but it won't work. You can tell me to leave and think it will break my heart but it won't." Frank explained, taking a tentative step closer. "I don't care if you think we can't be together, because I know we can. You hurt me Gerard, you really did, but I can't hate you, not now, not ever.

"Gerard, I don't care what's happening with you to make you think we can't be together because we can. You are the most important thing in my life and I will never leave you. What you said back there? I can't even pretend to understand why. I just know that I want you to take it back.

"You may think this won't work Gerard, me and you, but it will. You wanna know how I know? Because of the butterflies I get every time I look at you or the way my heart pounds when you smile or how you make me smile even when I just want to give in.

"Gerard, there is so much here that we can't deny it. You can try to force me to leave but it isn't going to work, not now, not ever. Goddamnit Gerard, I have never chased anyone before. Too many people have walked out of my life for me to care, but I can't lose you.

"I will never be able to hate you. Do you wanna know why? Because I fell for you. I fell for you before I even knew who you were. I used to watch you thinking that I couldn't see you. I kept coming to school for you, to see you every day. I kept fighting because I hoped that one day I would be able to speak to you.

"Whatever happens, I will not let you go. I fell for you harder than I ever have before and I'm not willing to let you go. Somewhere in this fucked up heart of mine is a reason why, but I can't find it and I don't want to because I love you Gerard. I love you so fucking much that I would do anything to be with you.

"I'm not going to leave you until the day I die. The only time I will ever stop loving you is when I am six feet under because that is the only time my heart won't be able to beat your name. This is love Gerard. I want to be with you through everything but I can't if you don't let me.

"I'm always gonna love you Gerard, no matter how hard you try to get rid of me. I won't stop loving you because the day I do is the day I die." Frank stopped and took a deep breath, tears pricking in his eyes as he stepped closer, his arms wrapping around my waist as he held me.

"Frank." I muttered before wrapping my arms around his shoulders, my heart breaking as I felt his silent sobs, his shoulders shaking. "Frank. Look at me." I whispered, sighing when he shook his head. "I love you too." I muttered into his hair, pulling him closer. "But I meant what I said back there. We can't be together, not while he's hunting me because he'll hurt you Frank. I know he will and that'll be what kills me. I can't see you get hurt. Not now."
"You're gonna have to cope Gee." He sniffled. "Because I'm not going anywhere."

He snaked one of his arms behind my neck, tugging my face down so I was looking at him. My heart shattered even more as I looked at his red eyes, tears staining his cheeks. He looked at me closely before raising his head slightly, his lips meeting mine. I hesitated for a second before tangling my fingers in Frank's hair and tugging him closer, moaning as I felt him against my leg.

---

I lay on my back on my bed, my arms above me with pictures of possible suspects. "We're never gonna find him." I groaned, Mikey mirroring my actions. "We've been searching for almost a week now and there is still nothing that makes me think of who it could be."
"Gerard, you have to think." Mikey pushed. "When you've worked out who it is then maybe you'll feel better."
"Mikes, I have no idea." I muttered as I threw yet another photo onto the growing pile.

I sat up, my heart pounding as I listened to footsteps creeping across the floor towards the bed. "Mikey?" I asked, my voice slightly shaky.
"No Gerard, it's John. I came to check on you." He explained as he sat on the edge of my bed. "How are you holding up?" He asked, his eyes boring into me.
"I'm good. Just worried about Mikes, that's all." I muttered, trying to get comfy again on the bed.
"Oh, I'm sure he's fine. Your dad didn't touch him." John whispered, his hand resting on my thigh.

"I know who it is!" I yelled as I jumped to my feet.
"Who Gee?" Mikey asked, spinning the chair around so he was facing me.
"It doesn't matter..." I began as I hunted down a hoodie. "I'll be back in a minute."
"Gee, be careful okay? I don't want you getting hurt."
"I will, I promise."

---

"Gerard, what a pleasant surprise." John exclaimed as he opened the door.
"How could you?" I asked, my voice even, my hands in fists beside me. "How the fuck could you?"
"I'm confused." John faked, his words forced.
"Oh, I'm sure you won't be when I tell James what kind of a man you really are." I snapped as I pushed past him and into the kitchen.
"I wouldn't if I were you." He hissed as he grabbed hold of my arm.
"Why the hell not?" I asked, my teeth gritted.
"Because I could hurt Frank, maybe put him through what you went through."

"James, I have something to tell you." I said as I stood in front of him, flinching when John stepped up behind me.
"What's up Gerard?" He asked, his smile fading when he saw how tense I was.
"I was raped." I blurted, my eyes on John. "I know who it was but it wasn't the first time he's done it."
"I would shut up if I were you Gerard." Snapped John, his gaze threatening.
"Explain." James said.
"Well, I think your husband can do that just fine. Maybe you'd like to explain how you slept with a helpless eleven year old or how you drugged me so you could get your fix? I think he has a right to know John. He needs to know what kind of man he is married to." I explained, trying to keep my voice cool.
"John? Please tell me it isn't true?" James asked, tears pricking in the corner of his eyes.
"What would you do if it was true, huh? Turn me into the cops?" John sneered.
"Tell me the truth John." James ordered, climbing to his feet and placing himself between me and John.

"Get out of my house." James muttered when John refused to answer. "Get the fuck out of my house!"
"Don't forget I have custody of Frank, so I go he goes." John laughed, my eyes darting up when Frank walked in the room.
"You might as well admit it John, you're just making this harder on yourself." I pushed, my eyes on Frank's confused face.
"Admit what? What's going on?" He asked.
"Just admit how you raped me John. It'll all be easier if you do."
"For fucks sake. Yes I raped you and I fucking enjoyed it Gerard. It was the best sex I had had in years because you couldn't tell me not to be rough. Fucking hell, when you were eleven was just amazing because you were to naive to know what was happening until it was too late and threatening your brother made sure you didn't tell anyone." John took a breath. "What are you going to do about it?" He sneered.
"I'm not going to do anything." I answered as I pulled my phone out of my pocket. "You just admitted the whole thing to the Belleville police department."

Sirens filled the silence as John looked between us, panic on his face as Frank opened the front door, pointing to John and letting the police officers over to him. "Mr Carmichael, you are under arrest for sexual assault and rape of a minor. Anything you don't say may harm your defense but may be used in court."

---

Frank wrapped his arms around me as I stood, staring at the spot John had vacated, tears streaming down my face, my body numb. "How could he?" James muttered, walking slowly towards us.
"I don't know." I muttered, tears falling freely. "I don't know."
"How long has he been doing this to you Gee?" Frank asked, looking up at me.
"The first time was when I was eleven. The last time was the other week. In between that? I don't know, I lost count."
"Why didn't you tell someone Gerard?" James asked, his hands shaking as he embraced me.
"Because he threatened to hurt Mikey and I didn't want that to happen." I explained, stepping back from them both.

---

I slid into bed, my arms tired, my head hurting, and closed my eyes, slowing my breathing right down.

"Well done." A voice muttered from the shadows. "I'm proud of you."
"For what? I didn't do anything." I replied, sitting upright.
"You did though. You found it out without help. You've stopped the dreams from coming true." He replied as he stepped into the light.
"Who are you?" I asked, my legs tucked underneath me as I tried to warm up.
"My identity doesn't matter. All that does is that I was made to keep you and Frank safe, and that's what I'm doing." He said, perching on the edge of my bed.

"I've seen you before." I muttered.
"Probably. You might not remember though."
"You were there when it happened. Like not physically, but in my mind. It was you that helped my shut down when he did it wasn't it?" I asked, leaning forwards, my elbows on my knees. The figure nodded.

"You have to sleep, but you must know, just because you got rid of the man hurting him in your dreams, it doesn't mean it's the end."
"What do you mean?" I yelled as the figure faded away.

---

I stepped into the kitchen, shock registering on my face when I saw my dad. "What are you doing here?" I asked, reaching for a mug and coffee.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Was my dad's reply.
"You can't answer a question with a question." I replied, spooning sugar into my mug.
"Don't get sassy, just tell me."
"Because he threatened Mikey. He said he would do the same and I couldn't deal with that. If it was just me, I knew Mikey was safe, so I didn't tell anyone." I muttered as I took the stool opposite.
"I am so proud of you Gerard." My dad whispered as he tugged me in for a hug. "What you did back there? That was so grown up of you. It makes you ten times better than those people who just never tell anyone."
"Dad, I'm fine. I promise. I have Frank to help me through it all and I'm not letting him go because I love him dad. I know mom doesn't want me to be with him but I love him and that's all that matters." I whispered, fighting back the tears.
"I will support you with everything." My dad muttered as he stepped back, tears in his eyes.

Notes

*peeks head from around corner* is it safe to come out yet?