The End is Easier

"Frank, I know this is only our second session
But, I would like to prescribe you medication."
I could feel my heart sink down into my stomach.
Do I just give off the crazy vibe?
How could he already be giving me medication. We just met!
I didn't want to be medicated,
I'm not fucking insane!
"I'm not crazy!"
I blurted out.
Realizing what I had just said,
I quickly covered my face with my hands
and slumped back on the uncomfortable couch.
"I know your not crazy Frank. I just think the medication I'm prescribing might help."
I just stared at him threw my fingers.
He wrote something down on that god damned clipboard!
I've begun to really dislike the clipboard, and all the shit he writes down.
I slumped back even farther on the couch.
just wishing that it would engulf me and I would disappear.
That would be great. To just vanish and never be seen by human eyes again.
I could feel Mr.Way looking at me.
I know he was just sitting there, staring, and jotting down every little thing I do.
"What are you thinking about Frank?"
I sat up and moved my hands from my face.
I glared at him.
"Why do you care?"
Of course, he wrote something down on the clipboard.
I reached into my pocket fished out my cigarettes.
"You know that's a terrible habit. Especially at such a young age."
He pointed to my pack.
I didn't care. I've heard that speech a billion times from Ray. He gets all angry whenever I smoke at his house. He'll yell and tell me I'm gonna die and then he'll open all the windows and make a big fuss about it.
I just shook my head and lit one anyway.
This session wasn't going anywhere, and I intended for it to stay that way. I just sat there not saying anything.
Mr.Way seemed occupied with something on his desk anyway, so it didn't really matter.
"Are you going to answer my question?"
Mr.Way didn't look up from whatever he was doing.
"What question?"
I said sarcastically.
He put down his pen and looked over at me.
"What are you thinking about?"
He asked for the second time.
I sighed.
"You really want to know what I think?"
I said venom dripping from my words.
He shook his head up and down.
I shook my shoulders and breathed in.
"I hate your fucking clipboard! What do you even write in it? About how crazy I am?
You never seem interested in what I'm saying. You only care about the stupid shit that your working on at your desk!
And your giving me medication? This is my second session! I'm not crazy!
And my poor mother is paying you to just sit there and piss me off? No I don't think so!
So if your such a great 'doctor' or whatever the hell you wanna call yourself, actually fucking help me!
And that concludes what I'm fucking thinking about!"
I crossed my arms and stared down hard at the floor.
Mr.Way didn't say anything.
I didn't look up at him, I just kept my focus on the floor as if it would walk away.
"How do you feel?"
Mr.Way broke the silence.
"What?"
I asked, confused.
"How do you feel, Frank."
I balled up my fists.
"Did you not just hear what I said? Were you listening at all?"
His face was calm. Not a shed of anger showed.
"Yes, and sense you answered that question I moved on to another."
He gave me a sly smile.
"So again, how do you feel?"
I withheld myself from yelling.
"Pissed Mr.Way. I'm feeling rather pissed."
I said calmly and with the same kind of irritating smile he had on.
He opened the second drawer on his desk and pulled out a pack of cigarettes.
Hypocrite.
And spun his chair around to look outside.
he reached into his vest breast pocket and retrieved a lighter, and lit his cigarette.
"Frank were not making much progress. Please come see me tomorrow, maybe we can get some things straightened out and get to know one another better."
He talked out of the side of his mouth with the cigarette clutched tightly between his teeth.
I got up from my seat.
"Wait Franklin."
He held up a small slip of paper toward me.
"Give this to your mother. She can get it at the pharmacy downtown. I would like you to start it tonight. Twice a day. One in the morning, one in the afternoon."
I grabbed the paper from him and left the room.
I walked to the elevator and glanced down at the paper.
Written in sloppy hand writing was,
Zyprexa
I sigh for what seems like the thousandth time today and push the silver button that has a glimmering golden '1' on it.
I make it to the first floor.
I wave goodbye to the secretary and walk home.

Notes

sorry this chapter is really short! but dont worry i