I am afraid to keep on living

(Cassie's pov)

Everything is dark. As always. I didn’t know where I was or how I got there. Sometimes I could hear voices, sometimes familiar voices and sometimes not, but I never understand what they say.

Muttering. It starts again. This time is a familiar voice, but I don’t know who it is.What’s this? This is new… I feel… like if someone was grabbing my hand… Who’s holding my hand? I tried to speak and ask who was it, but I couldn’t speak. Maybe, I could hold that hand back. I tried and hold that hand, it worked, I squeezed and the muttering got louder and I could difference more than one voice, but as usual, I couldn’t understand what they say.

Slowly, the muttering got lower and lower until it disappeared. The same happened with the feeling of someone holding my hand, the feeling slowly faded away and everything went back to normality. Dark, silent and alone. I stayed like that for hours, until something unexpected happened…

“Cassie…” Someone said my name! I think it was the voice I heard before but I’m not sure who it was. Then I heard muttering that I couldn’t understand, but between that muttering I heard my name again. “...Cassie…” Who was that voice? How did it know my name?

Little by little that, between that muttering I could understand more words. “...bridge…” The voice said. “...late…” Then the words started to slowly join together. “...seemed to last forever…” What seemed to last forever? What was this voice talking about? “...the sad look in your eyes…” It said.The sad look in my eyes?

Suddenly I saw a light in the middle of all this darkness. That light slowly became bigger and bigger. “...I was falling with you…” The voice said as the light was almost destroying all the darkness. Then it happened. “I love you, Cassie.” That voice! Gerard! The light became very bright and I closed my eyes.

When I opened them I saw myself on a bed. Was I in hospital? Why was I here? I look around and saw Gerard next to me, he was looking at ceiling of the room, but he seemed different, he seemed broken inside. But, why? The I remember what I heard. ‘I love you, Cassie.’ I heard him saying that before I saw myself in this bed. “I love you too, Gerard.” I whispered.

Gerard slowly turned to face me. He looked confused and a little scared. “Cassie?” He asked. Then he slowly moved his hand towards me and stroked my face. “Am dreaming?” He asked staring at my eyes. “Am I dreaming again that you wake up?” He asked and moved his hand away from me.

“Your eyes, I haven’t seen them in months… It feels so unreal…” He muttered. “I am dreaming again. I must fell asleep in hospital.” He said and stood up. I wanted to say something but I didn’t know what to say. I was very confused, I didn’t know what was happening. I didn’t know why I was here or why Gerard don’t seem like… Gerard was…

I looked around the room and saw Mikey and Frank sleeping on two chairs. Suddenly Frank began to move sleeping and hit his head with the wall. He opened his eyes, then he looked at me and stood up very quickly. “SHE IS AWAKE! SHE IS AWAKE!” He yelled waking up Mikey and making Gerard open widely his eyes. “So… I aren’t dreaming…” Gerard said.

He moved near me and hugged me. “I’ve missed you.” He said between tears. Then he pulled off me and looked me at the eyes. “Say something please.” He said with a sad look while Frank and Mikey looked confused from the background. “Why am I here?” I asked.

Notes

Yeah... this chapter was very weird, I know... Sorry if you don't like it :/