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Someone Out There Loves You After All (Gerard Way)

Chapter 24: Some Nights I Stay Up Cashing In My Bad Luck

Title from Some Nights by Fun.

Four months later


"Lyric, are you coming?" I almost jumped from suddenly hearing Gerard's voice in the room, he was supposed to have been on the phone with the guys.

"Yeah, I just need to finish getting dressed." I said, trying to pull my shirt over my head and smiling at Gee, who's hair had been bleached and cut for a second time in preparation of My Chemical Romance's first The Black Parade concert.

The album was due to be released in a week I got a strong feeling it'd be going platinum once the public heard it.

It was entertaining since The Black Parade had only just been announced and there had been an almost endless amount of demands for them to tour the album. I don't think there was a single country in the world that didn't want to see My Chemical Romance in action.

Since I was Gerard's girlfriend I got to have the best seat in the house of their first concert, right on the side of the stage, so I got not only the best view but got to assault him with kisses the second he came into the wings.

"Are you trying to tease me?" He asked playfully, as if I was intentionally showing him the near naked upper half of my body, well I've done it before but I'm not doing it now, we haven't got the time.

Before I could reply to him Gerard's warm arms wrapped around my waist and he pulled me onto the bed with him, making me burst into a fit of giggles. Ending the struggle between me and my clothing, he pulled it away and threw it to the other side of the room before pinning me down and grinning.

"I think you're actually the one who's teasing me." I muttered, grabbing him by the shirt and sealing the gap between our lips.

"Maybe just a little bit," he mumbled as I automatically started trying to get him out of his clothes, "how long would you say we have until we need to be at the music hall?" It was obvious he had the same thing in mind as me.

Because of all the album related things Gerard had been occupied by we barely had any time to spend together. Even when he came back to his apartment that I'd indefinitely moved into he'd just lie down and fall asleep.
We'd be lucky to get more than ten minutes alone.

The guys had volunteered to help out at the venue and taken my Mum with them so she couldn't be here supervising every little thing he and I did either and the show wasn't going to be starting for another three hours.

"How long? Long enough." I grinned when he sat up and pulled his shirt off, carelessly tossing it aside before bringing his fingers to my jeans and attempting to unbutton them.

There's many things I've learnt from my time with Gerard, both good and bad, but the most entertaining of all of them is how extraordinarily bad he is at taking off pants, mine, his and probably everyone else's.

So while he was being all sexy, trying to take my blue jeans off I was lying on the bed, laughing so hard I gasping for air because as each second passed he became more frustrated.
The smirk he'd been wearing changed to a frown of concentration and I decided to help him before he had a spazz.

"Gee, it's alright." I giggled, undoing the two buttons he'd struggled with and propping myself up on my elbows as took off the sweatpants he'd been walking around in all morning and afternoon.

Since he needed to get changed into a different set of clothes for the show tonight Gerard could go in there wearing whatever the hell he felt like, I didn't get that option because I was a girl who had to look 'presentable for important events', according to my mother.

"The guys will kill you if you're late." I reminded him as he tugged my jeans off.

"They can do whatever they want, I don't care," he brushed my now green again hair out of my face and kissed me roughly, effectively erasing any consequences of not getting there from my mind, "I've missed being alone with you." I think I've missed him even more, I don't get to distract myself with comics and albums like he does when I'm not around.

"You need to be at the apartment more." I said, wondering how on earth we were managing to have a conversation when we were so close to being naked.

"We have a week of concerts before a break then we can have a whole weekend together." It still wasn't enough time but it was better two small days than not being able to see each other at all, I'd take what I could get.

One thing I'd prepared for when getting into a relationship with Gerard was that he couldn't be around all the time. He had to go on tour, do interviews for tv and magazines, he'd also had a comic company called Dark Horse accept his pitch for The Umbrella Academy so he needed to meet up with people all the time.

"Do you promise?"

"I'll do everything I can." It wasn't as good as a promise but it was the best answer he could give me, neither of us knew when or if he was going to be called out to do something.

I planned to say something else but Gerard silenced me with a kiss and the feeling of his warm hand running up my bare side made me sigh. Our kiss paused for a moment, allowing me to sit up so he could undo the tiny hinge of my bra that even I was fumbly with.
Funnily enough the skill he lacked with removing jeans he made up for with getting bras off.

"Nice trick Suave Master." I gigged as he easily flipped us over so I was lying on his chest.

"Nowhere near as nice as you." Another giggle and I dropped a kiss on his lips.

"But you're wrong," I purred, making the best attempt I could to look seductive which more than likely was pathetic, "I'm not nice."

He smirked and ran a finger along my jaw, "is that so?" I bit my lip and nodded, "I don't believe you, I think you'l have to show me."


"How the hell did you manage to be late?!" Brian Schechter (AKA the manager of My Chemical Romance) yelled, at Gerard and me who had just walked into the concert hall.
Instead of giving him a straight answer Gerard shrugged as if it was no big deal which even I knew it wasn't.

"You called me over an hour ago saying that you were about to get into your car!" I'd met Brian before and he was a cool dude, really laid back so it was obvious that he was in a spot of stress for him to be freaking out like he was.

"We were stuck in traffic." Gerard said, not putting much conviction into the lie and casually looking around the empty standing space that would soon be filled with thousands of excited, screaming fans.

Seeming to appear out of thin air Frank walked past us, a grin visible from a thousand miles away clear on his face, "liar, you were having sex." He didn't even stop and kept walking, not allowing himself to get caught.

"Can it, Iero!" I shouted after him, feeling a blush spreading across my cheeks, I didn't want anyone to know what Gerard and I had been doing.

"It doesn't matter. Get up on stage, do the soundcheck then get to wardrobe and change." Brain noticed some crew carrying a prop then ran off towards them yelling 'hey' and 'stop'.

"Maybe we shouldn't have let ourselves become so distracted." I said, walking over to the stage and boosting myself on with the help of Gerard who clambered up much more easily than I did.

"You can distract me as often as you want." As I straightened myself he kissed me, soft, short, sweet and thankfully it didn't give me an opportunity to jump on him since it was over much too fast.

Noticing Gerard was now here, staff came from the wings, handed him a microphone and began a discussion in techno geek talk that I couldn't understand. I decided my presence would more than likely distract Gee so I wandered off backstage in search of my Mother who said she'd be waiting here for me.

The energy of the upcoming concert was in the air, it was coming from the sound techs, the people working in wardrobe, assistants, even me. I've been to a My Chemical Romance concert before but this was going to be something on a whole other level.

It was strange to think that I've seen them live before, never thinking in a million years that I'd be able to meet Gerard Way but here I am, as his girlfriend and walking around backstage, waiting for their show to start. It's kinda funny how things worked out, it was so unreal it felt like a movie or fairytale.

I'd even gotten lucky when it came to the mafia that'd been attempting to hunt Gee and me down, they seem to have given up. We've been able to walk around without mysterious vans following us or people staring for too long.

The black my hair used to be got taken out and the original green was put back in, allowing me to feel much more like my old self. It made me feel happier and it allowed me to pretend the whole murder in the subway thing never happened.
I was a normal person again.

As all the worry faded away, Gerard seemed to forget as well.
What used to be fresh cuts on his wrists healed and over the five months from then to now became scars that barely stood out against his pale skin.

He hasn't done it since the night we spent together, he kept his promise and was a happier person because of it. He smiled more, talked more and was generally in a better mood.
Of course with Gerard's brighter mood came his friends which meant that Frank, Ray, Bob and his brother Mikey were over nearly every second day which was fine but we never got any privacy when we wanted it.

I'd formed a close friendship with Frank and Ray, tried a lot with Bob but it was difficult because he didn't talk much and Mikey, I don't think he wanted anything to do with me after the encounter we had on the day Gee went back to the recording studio. I got the impression he thought I was a bitch which in all honesty I was fine with, I'll do whatever it takes to keep Gerard safe from the danger that is himself.

"Boo!" I jumped at the voice behind me and turned around to see Ray and my Mum laughing loudly.

They'd become two peas in a pod, managing to bond over their mutual love of metal music, rocking guitar riffs and similar hair. They started talking about music at my birthday party in april and everything just went from there.

"Don't scare me." I complained, putting a hand over my heart to calm its nervous beating as Mum put a backstage pass around my neck to show everyone I was allowed to be back here and that I shouldn't be kicked out then tucked another one into my pocket.

"I'm sorry sweetie, it's just that you didn't see us and I had to." And there you go folks, the main parental figure in my life is even more childish than I am, do I unlock an achievement for this?

"Have you seen Gerard?" Ray asked, bouncing on his toes and looking around, he was obviously nervous about the bands singer not being here in time for curtain call.

"Yeah, he's doing soundcheck, right out on the stage." Toro nodded, his fro bouncing and walked off, leaving Mum and I standing there, her grinning widely since we both knew that deep, deep down she was a giant child.

"Speaking of seeing people, has Dayna shown up yet?" Gerard had suggested I invite my best friend since she loved MCR and missed out on buying tickets before the show sold out.

"Sorry but your friend's still MIA." Mum shrugged, not appearing to care much before getting distracted by something in the distance.

So despite the fact she was supposed to be the mature one out of the two of us she ran off like a kid in a toy store, not caring that I wanted to have a conversation or needed help looking for Dayna the no show.

Noticing a familiar gangly frame walking from one door to another I called out a name, "Mikey!" He turned around as I ran over, knowing he would have no interest in chatting with me but I had to ask him something.

"Have you seen my friend Dayna?" He frowned and shook his head, not seeming to recognise the name.


"Dayna, tall like you, red hair, really loud. Gerard told me to invite her." Mikey stopped staring at the floor and went quiet for a second.

"Oh yeah, I know her. She's playing cards with Bob in the dressing room." He pointed to a door, since it was obvious there was no chance on earth I'd be able to find my way around this place, then went off in his own direction.

It was as exactly as Mikey said when I walked into the dressing room, Dayna sitting on the couch with Bob playing a game of Go Fish.

Her legs were covered with a sturdy pair of jeans, one of the most recently released MCR shirts had been cut up and hung purposely from her shoulders while her red hair was pulled back in a tight ponytail, she was completely ready for the concert.

"Hey, were have you been?" Dayna grinned at me, waving with the hand not full of cards before turning back to Bob who passed her a card.

"Uh, Gerard and I got stuck in traffic, we just got here." I lied, Dayna visibly picked up on it but didn't say anything about it and Bob didn't seem to care in the slightest, either that or he wasn't listening.

"You're gonna wear that?" She asked, critiquing my outfit like always then doing a fist pump of satisfaction when Bob handed her his last card.

"Don't forget I'm gonna switch between being backstage and on the floor, and I think this is for you." I handed her the spare backstage pass I had on me and she put it around her neck, staring down at the plastic coated card with MCR and VIP written on it in a typewriter print.

I looked around the room and noticed clothes hanging neatly from a rack and walked over to them, "Bob, are these the costumes you and the guys are gonna wear on stage?" I ran my fingers over one of the jackets admiring how well it'd been made and that each one was completely different from the other.

"Yeah, that's Gerard's one you're looking at." I smiled, I hadn't gotten a chance to see their costumes yet, Gee wanted it to be saved for the show, well it was show time and I finally get to see it.

I heard the dressing room door open and turned to see Mikey, Ray and Gerard coming in shoving each other around and laughing like a regular bunch of guys. I assumed it was time for them to get ready for the show and knew that unless Dayna wanted to see each one of them almost completely naked, she'd want to get out of here.

"Leading up to show time?" I wondered, passing Gerard his jacket which he took from me before leaning down and stealing a kiss, okay saying stealing's ridiculous, I'd more than willingly kissed him back and at the same time wished the dressing room would be unoccupied for the next couple of hours and not because the band had to go on stage.

"Mmm, if I were you I'd get Dayna out of here before she gets too comfortable." He gestured to my friend who was was lying down with her legs up on the couch, watching the band who didn't seem game to change while she and I were still in the room.

"Okay, I'll see you when you come out." I stood on my toes and kissed Gerard once more before grabbing Dayna by the arm and pulling her out of the room.

The staff that'd been taking their time walking around were now hurrying, making any final checks before it was too late to fix an issue. It made it that much more exciting that I'd already heard the songs and no one else had. I'd gotten a glance at their set list when Gerard brought it back to the apartment and it was in the exact order of the tracks on their album.

I didn't know what I was more excited to hear, obviously Famous Last Words was at the top of the list and probably Disenchanted, I just wanted to hear everything over and over even if I could go home and have Gerard sing me anything I wanted.

Brian came briskly walking down the hall and stopped when he saw Dayna and I, "do you know where the boys are?"

"Getting changed. Brian, don't worry dude, the show will go fine. Calm down, you're just stressing yourself out more than you need to. They're all in a good mood and they'll play great, go sit down and have a drink." Brian nodded and walked away, a little slowing this time and it appeared my words had managed to have some effect on him.

The next person to make an appearance was my Mum who had a bottle of something or other in her hand. I had a strong feeling she'd be showing up at a lot more concerts than this one, after all she was almost the exact same as me when she was a teenager and aside from physically ageing and having a child, she hadn't grown up at all. Deep down she was a teenager who wanted to go to festivals and hang out with bands.

I was glad she hadn't forced me to come back to Australia with her and using my go to technique of putting it off and putting it off I managed to avoid visiting the police and that's how we are where we're at now. She got her visa extended and has been helping out at the coffee shop where I work when I can but I've mainly been hanging out at Gerard's apartment, painting an enjoying the benefits of having a boyfriend who's in a band. I'd also started going to school again, part time though and I'd dropped most of the drama classes because I didn't have the desire or time to attend them anymore.

"You must be excited for Gerard." Mum said, grinning at me in a way that didn't match her age and giving off a vibe more in tune with Dayna than someone her age.

"Yeah, he was really nervous last night. But this is gonna be the first time the public will be hearing all of The Black Parade so he's got more than enough reason to be freaked out." I knew Gerard wouldn't suddenly get stage fright but there was a good chance he'd have a butterfly or two in his stomach, I only hoped nerves wouldn't affect his singing.

The door opened behind me and Bob walked out, looking rather relaxed despite knowing the show would be on in less than forty minutes. Proof of that was the group of minor musicians walking by with their instruments, preparing to do their job as an opening band. Apparently they're called Play More Emo and they're good, that's at least what Gerard's said but I've also heard him singing Dancing Queen in the shower so they could go either way.

"They must be the opener." Bob murmured to himself, watching the other band walk by with his hands in his pockets, keeping up his usual quiet act that I've only seen him drop a couple of times while hanging out with him.

"Bob, you look very dashing in your costume." Dayna said, turning around to smile at the drummer, she wasn't flirting as far as I knew, just being polite but it was still enough to get him go bright red.

"T-thanks." He stuttered out before making a quick escape so she couldn't say anything else.
The next people out of the dressing room were Mikey and Ray which means Gerard and Frank should be out any moment. I could hear the opening band tuning up which wouldn't take too long since the doormen would start letting in the excited fans soon.

Suddenly there was the sound of giggling, interspersed by snorts and I wondered what Gee and Frank must be doing, probably something stupid. Once they got near each other their IQs dropped by at least twenty points. My curiosity got the best of me and I decided I had to go in to see what they were laughing about. I opened the door to Frank sitting on the dressing room couch, laughing his ass off and Gerard standing by the mirror, making 'ah' sounds while holding his hand to his face.

"Gee, are you alright?" I asked, walking over to him and putting a hand on his shoulder as he turned around and leant against the bench behind him.

"I accidentally stabbed myself when trying to put on eyeliner." I got him to move his hand out of the way and other than a slightly red eye he looked like he'd live and the show would be able to go on.

"He just failed emo school." Frank giggled, standing up and leaving the room now that Gerard's pain wasn't acting as a form of entertainment for him anymore, I should have known he'd be laughing at something bad happening to Gerard.

Noticing he was wearing his costume I took a step back. He was gorgeous but at the same time looked like a belonged in an old cavalry of some sort, I wasn't used to seeing him appear so serious other than when he was in a bad mood which had been a rarity for the past four months.

"Are you alright?" He frowned, looking down and gently holding my both of my hands in his, a happy smile on his face that I'd never get tired of.

"Yeah, I'm just not used to seeing you be, so handsome." We'd been going out for a while now and I'd still feel awkward complimenting him sometimes and it wasn't that hard for me to get him to blush either.

Gerard bowed his head enough to kiss me and I got him to bend down a little more so he would be on my level, his tongue brushed against my lips which earned a small moan from me. He moved his hands around to my back then dropped them down enough that they were resting on my butt before pulling me closer to him.

"The door in here locks." He murmured, as I took the opportunity to suck in some air before I was left breathless once more.

"Gee, I really want to but you have to go on stage in thirty minutes and no, we can't say we got stuck in traffic." He chuckled, moved his hands off the danger zone and onto my waist then rested his forehead against mine.

"The second we get back to the apartment though, no matter what?" I nodded, I wanted to lock the door and say 'screw the show' as much as he did but we really couldn't do it, there'd be disappointed and pissed of fans, not to mention the meltdown Brian would have if he were to find out the reason Gerard was late on the stage was over something like sex.

There was a short knock on the door before (speak of the devil) Brian popped his head in, "Gee, you need to start warming up and getting ready to go on and Lyric, I advise you step away from him so he doesn't get so, um, distracted." With a small bit or reluctance Gerard let go and I moved back, allowing my boyfriend to get into whatever rockstar mindset he needed.

"Are people being let in yet?" I asked, settling with just holding Gerard's hand for the moment since any being any closer would probably result in either one of us being told off by the manager who was wary of how we could be around each other.

"Yep, and the opening band just went on so I'd say you have anywhere between twenty to twenty five before it's show time." Gerard smiled, and walked with me to the door that Brian had opened wide enough to show we weren't going to be left alone and we walked out into the hallway where the only people were technicians and staff running around.

Dayna who was walking by noticed I'd reemerged from the room and came running up, almost visibly buzzing with energy, chances were she wouldn't be calming down until tomorrow morning, neither would I.

"I have to find the guys, alright? You keep an eye on nutsie here." I giggled and let go of his hand before he went in the opposite direction, towards where the band would hang out before they went onstage, Brian went after him pointing to a piece of paper in his hand and talking quickly.

"So when are we going down to the floor?" Dayna said, playing with her pass card and rocking on the balls of her feet, trying to contain all the energy she had which was a first.

"I want to see Gerard go on but if you want to head to the pit now, feel free." I knew Dayna would hang around for as long as possible, she's never gotten to go backstage before so she was living up the opportunity.

I have no idea where Mum was but I got the feeling she will have gotten enough drinks in her that her teenage self had kicked in and she'd be running around, probably acting a fair bit like Dayn and confusing the hell out of staff. People are more than likely wanting to know what the psychotic forty three year old woman who is acting like a fan is doing backstage.

"You don't mind? It's just that the opener doesn't sound too bad and I wanna check 'em out, I'll wait near the stairs okay?" I nodded and she squealed before running off at fool speed, God help anyone who happens to be coming around the corner, they'll be flattened out like a human pancake.

'I should have gone with Gerard' I thought as I walked down the hall towards the front of the stage, hoping he'd be there and not in the middle of a disappearing act that he often pulls in large places like malls for an example. I took a glance at a conveniently placed clock on the wall and noticed the time had very quickly gone from seven thirty to seven fifty, ten minutes until the guys go on and take the stage. Doesn't give me much time to find Gee.

I jogged down the corridors, having to stop staff members who didn't look to busy and ask them for directions. I have no idea how the band can figure out mazes like this so easily, it must come with the job title. There's a very good chance that I'm never going to be seeing my Mum again, she can't navigate to safe her life and she'll more than likely spend the rest of the night wandering around, trying to figure out where she is.

"Uh, where's the right wing of the stage?" I asked a man who was writing on a clip board and he stared at my pass that Gerard had signed (which basically informed everyone I was here with him) before answering.

"End of the hall, take a left and you'll be there." He turned his attention back to the clip board and I said a breathy 'thank you' before running again, by this point Gerard and the guys would be getting their final briefing.

I followed the simple directions and before I knew it I was standing in a nice open space with the sound of music from the opening band and screaming people coming through a thick curtain blocking off the front area from backstage. A woman was standing in front of Gee, helping him into what appeared to be a hospital gown that velcroed up at the back. Once she was out of the way a man put something in Gerard's ear, probably a way to block out the screams, I really don't know what it could be.

Mikey, Ray, Bob and Frank got the same attention from staff but didn't get any hospital gowns although they did get their required tools of the trade, guitars for Frank and Ray, bass for Mikey and drumsticks for Bob. Gerard must get his microphone just before he goes on.

I'd actually felt quite calm despite what was going on but now I was starting to feel nervous and walked up to Gee with my whole body feeling like it was buzzing.

"Thank God you're here, I thought I was gonna have to look for you," Gerard said, wrapping his arm around my shoulder once he noticed me, "are you scared?" I nodded and slowed, my stomach feels like it has a heartbeat, "me too." He whispered.

I looked around and found it interesting to see the usually cool, calm and collected Mikey literally jumping up and down on the spot with his bass leaning on a wall, that must be his way of getting ready for a show. Ray was practicing the same set of notes over and over again, Bob seemed to be praying and Frank was talking to a black haired girl who'd come in a side door.

Noticing it was ever so slightly messed up I fixed Gerard's hair so it was smoothed down and absentmindedly wondered if Dayna had safely made it into the pit and if Mum was with her.

"Your Mother went into the crowd a couple of minutes ago." Gee commented, picking up on my thoughts that I didn't think were that obvious.

The sound of drums, guitars and vocals dissipated and my stomach went into a know, the other band's finished, it's time for My Chemical Romance's show to start. I don't know why but I really don't want to let go of Gerard even though I know I have to.

People started pulling on ropes to close the curtains as Play More Emo came offstage, looking sweaty and a little worse for wear. They weren't even on there for that long My Chem's gonna be performing for over an hour, the guys'll be completely trashed by the time they're finished, I think the audience will be too.

Frank realised what was going on and gave the black haired girl a quick kiss before coming over to the band who'd formed a circle that included me, and Brian who had magically shown up out of nowhere. I was pressed between Ray and Gerard, each member of the band saying what they wanted to come from tonight.

"Playing a show my Dad and Granddad can be proud of." Frank said, closing his eyes.

"Having the fans not freak out about me not having glasses anymore." Mikey muttered tensely.

"The audience leaving here even happier than they are now." Ray smiled, being his usual optimistic self.

"Being able to keep up with you crazy fuckers." Bob joked, the excitement of the concert making him a bit more talkative.

The last person to say something was Gerard who took a look at me and smiled, "being able to officially put my past behind me, for good." I along with everyone else was embraced in a tight hug that lasted few seconds before being let go as the band picked up their instruments.

Gee was handed a microphone and held it loosely at his side while I followed him to the side of the curtained stage, even if I were to walk right out into the middle no one would be able to see me but it didn't mean I'd want to do it.

"I love you." Gerard affectionately brushed my green hair out of my face and swooped in to kiss me before being ordered onto the stage by Brian.

"I love you too." I called out, not bothering to be too quiet because with the thousands of voices from the audience I don't think they would have heard me if I screamed at the top of my lungs.

Gee stood front and centre, his shoulders pulled back into a rigid pose with one arm held behind his back and the other clutching the microphone at his side. It was obvious from just seeing this that the whole show was going to be very dramatic which it needed to be considering the theme of the album.

Not wanting to miss the grand beginning I ran down the stairs at the side, flashed the security guard my backstage pass and was quickly pulled away by Dayna and Mum who were apparently allowed in front of the barricades and right up against the stage. The black haired girl Frank had been kissing earlier was there as well but she was at the opposite end and on an angle where she'd be able to see the rhythm guitarist before he even came out.

The barely lit area went completely black and the sound of the curtains being drawn echoed throughout the entire hall, building up the excitement of the fans to the ultimate peak. A single spotlight came on, landing on Gerard who was standing deathly still in the centre of the stage, his hospital gown clearly visible. Out of the speakers came the beeping of a heart monitor and the hisses of a breathing apparatus, the exact same sounds from the album, only a thousand times louder.

"Now come one come all to this tragic affair," Gerard sung into the mic, still staring at the ground, "wipe off that makeup, what's in is despair. So throw on the black dress, mix in with the lot. You might wake up and notice you're someone you're not." He slowly, looked up, moving his eyes from the stage to the audience waiting with bated breath.

"If you look in the mirror and don't like what you see. You can find out firsthand what it's like to be me," he dropped his arm and walked closer to the front of the stage, "so gather 'round piggies and kiss this goodbye. I'd encourage your smiles, I'll expect you won't cry!" He ripped off the hospital gown at the exact moment the drums and guitars kicked in, no one even noticing Mikey, Ray, Bob and Frank had come onstage.

"Another contusion, my funeral jag. Here's my resignation, I'll serve it in drag. You've got front row seats to the penitence ball. When I grow up I want to be nothing at all! I said yeah, yeah! I said yeah, yeah! C'mon, c'mon, c'mon I said. Save me! Get me the hell out of here. Save me! Too young to die and my dear. You can't! If you can hear me just walk away and take me!" It was easy to see the happiness on Gerard's face and it made the concert even better for me, knowing he was doing something that wouldn't fuel his habit of self destruction.

"Yeah! And if your heart stops beating. I'll be here wondering, did you get what you deserve? The ending of your life and if you get to heaven. I'll be here waiting, babe, did you get what you deserve? The end, and if your life won't wait, then your heart can't take this!" He was bouncing around the stage unbottling the energy that he'd allowed to build up from an entire day of talking about this gig.

"Have you heard the news that you're dead? No one ever had much nice to say, I think they never liked you anyway. Oh take me from the hospital bed. Wouldn't it be grand? It ain't exactly what you planned. And wouldn't it be great If we were dead? Ohh dead. Tongue-tied and oh so squeamish. You never fell in love. Did you get what you deserve? The ending of your life. And if we get to heaven. I'll be here waiting, babe, did you get what you deserve? The end, and if your life won't wait, then your heart can't take this." The crowd was now singing along, the song hadn't been released yet and no one knew the lyrics for sure but at the same time nobody cares and went on singing anyway.

"Have you heard the news that you're dead? No one ever had much nice to say, I think they never liked you anyway. Oh take me from the hospital bed. Wouldn't it be grand to take a pistol by the hand? And wouldn't it be great if we were dead?" It was strange to watch Gerard and know that at the end of this we were going to drive home in his Volkswagen and make love or judging by how much he was putting into this, fall asleep.

"And in my honest observation, during this operation. Found a complication in your heart, so long. 'Cause now you've got maybe just two weeks to live. 'Is that the most the both of you can give?' One, two, one two three four!" The chorus was the easiest part, even without knowing the words it'd be almost impossible to get the lyrics wrong.

"LA LA LA LA LA! LA LA LA LA LA LA! LA LA LA LA LA LA LA! Well come on," Gee was waving his arm about like an insane maestro controlling his hellish orchestra, "LA LA LA LA LA! LA LA LA LA LA LA! LA LA LA LA LA LA LA! Oh motherfucker, if life ain't just a joke, then why are we laughing?" Which in a way I guess he was.

"If life ain't just a joke, then why are we laughing? If life ain't just a joke, then why are we laughing? If life ain't just a joke then why am I dead? Dead!"


The show had finally reached it's conclusion, the band said goodnight then managed to drag themselves offstage without thee help of a roadie which was more than I could say for Dayna who needed Mum and I to carry her up the stairs and backstage. Of course she could have been faking it and was just too lazy to move like most of the time.

Everyone was exhausted, Mikey was literally lying on the floor, Frank had disappeared somewhere with the black haired girl but not without looking like he wanted to stay awake much longer, Ray had gone to the dressing room, with a god chance of him being asleep on the couch, Bob was getting the blisters on his hands taped up and Gerard was slumped against a wall after pouring an entire bottle of water over his head.

Mind you midway through the concert Gerard had decided he wanted to cool the fans down a little so he threw water on the audience and since Dayna and I were closest to the stage we got the most of it and Mum was smart enough to dodge.

There was a beeping coming from Dayna and everyone turned to look at her, she pulled her phone out and scanned the screen before pocketing her cell once more.

"My ride's here." Dayna sighed, walking over to Gerard, Mikey and me.

Mikey got a pat on the he'd since that was the most she could do with how he was positioned, Gerard got a strange half hug thing and for me it was a full bear hug. Her sis's gonna be hearing about this concert for the next week, at least.

"Thank you so much, could you guys thank Bob, Ray and Frank when you get a chance?" She asked as she walked towards the side door, her sister was an impatient person and would be likely to have a fit if she had to wait more than an ten minutes.

"Sure, I'll call you tomorrow." Dayna smiled and gave me a thumbs up before leaving through the side door, babbling to no one in particular about the show.

Gerard continued to sit on the floor, Mikey lying at his feet with his eyes closed and for a moment I thought he might have fallen asleep but he started talking as if he were standing up and having a normal conversation.

"That was a great gig, I forgot how much I missed all of this," Mikey said, propping himself up on an elbow, "but I don't miss the exhaustion. I think I want to go home, I should find Frank." He added and I remembered Mikey and Frank shared an apartment since neither one of them could be bothered to manage a house by themselves.

"Good luck, I think he'd rather go back to Jamia's than drive your tired ass home." Wait a second, oh I get it now, the black haired girl I kept seeing Frank with is Jamia, the girlfriend he loves to brag about.

"Can you giv-"

"Nope, Lyric and I are going back to the flat. I promised her we'd spend some time together and anyway, you live way on the upper north side, do you remember how far away that is from my place? Get Ray to give you a lift, he lives 'round there." Gerard stood up and Mikey groaned, not seeming all to keen with sharing a car ride with Toro.

"Fine, thanks bro." Mikey said sarcastically, lying back down and closing his eyes once more on the realisation Gerard wasn't going to cave and go a good forty minutes out of his was to take him home when Ray would be a much more suitable option.

"I'll see you tomorrow night." Gee leant down and fluffed his little brothers hair, getting a profanity or two thrown at him.

I held Gerard's hand as we navigated the halls, stopping by the dressing room so he could get changed out of his sweaty Black Parade costume and back into his regular, much better smelling clothes.

"I won't take too long, I just need to change and say bye to Brian, how 'bout you head out to the car and I'll meet you out there?" I nodded, it sounded like a good idea and I needed some fresh air, after thousands of fans sweating, singing and dancing for an hour the hall smelt more than a bit musty.

He grinned at me then went into the room and I instantly kicked into navigation mode, retracing the way we came in. There was too many exits around here, a side door, a back door, another side door that was near the front door, I think there's even a roof exit. Gerard and I had come in the back way, parking the car in a staff only parking lot that the fans would more than likely not notice if they were walking by, after all the entrance looked like an alleyway.

Gee had the car keys but that didn't bother me, it was too hot to wait in the car. Summer had kicked in and it was an average twenty six degrees celsius and only dropped slightly at night which has also made me notice it was a bad choice to wear a pair of jeans, at least I've got a singlet on underneath my shirt.

I found the door and walked down a short set of steps, noting Gerard's car was the only one left. Looks like the staff left pretty quickly after the show was over. There'd be a couple of people sticking around to clean up, confetti, trash in the pit but anything that'd been thrown on the stage had been taken into the wings by the band. Whatever had been labeled specifically for Gerard or anyone else would be taken home by them, surprisingly the one to have the biggest haul was Mikey. There was also that scary moment when Gerard got a pair of underwear thrown up for him which he is most definitely not taking home.

Thinking of the private time Gerard and I were going to have I smiled to myself and sat on the bonnet of his car, pulling my shirt off and leaving just my singlet on, enjoying the feeling of the light summer air on my skin. My phone started beeping and I retrieved it, wondering who would be texting me.

'where r u?'
Oh it's Mum.

'parking lot, waiting for G, we're goin back 2 his place'
Now that I think about it I don't know where she is, the second we brought Dayna backstage Mum just kinda disappeared into thin air.

'alrit, gnight sweetie, luv u'
I think the most interesting thing about Mum staying in New York is her new attitude towards me, before if she found out I was using subways to travel around she would have killed me. But since I've been dating Gerard she's really calmed down and I can get away with thing much more easily, maybe she's realised I'm responsible.

'luv u 2 mum' I texted back before shutting the screen off, Gee should be out here any second now.

"Down the alley, now." I frowned when I unexpectedly heard a serious and gruff voice, it wasn't from the parking lot but it wasn't from inside either, it was more like an echo.

I placed my shirt and phone beside me and slid off the bonnet, walking around to see if I could discover the source of the voice. It didn't take long and I came to a quick halt when I caught a glimpse of Dayna being marched down the alleyway with a gun pressed firmly to the back of her head.

Then there was the person behind the gun, my hand inched up my throat to the crescent moon necklace I was still wearing as a reminder of how everything could change in the blink of an eye, it just had.

I backed away then turned around and sprinted towards the car, hiding behind it so I could try to come up with an idea to get out of this situation. This time I had a lot more to do than keep myself alive, he had my best friend and could shoot her at any moment, that's probably the reason she's being brought back here. What could Dayna have done? She's as harmless as a fly, unless she accidentally bore witness to a murder like I did.

"You just had to be in that car with your whore of a sister didn't you?" The man said as they walked into the parking lot, Dayna visibly shaking.

What could Tori have done? I know Dayna's older sister was the black sheep in the family but I'd met her a couple of times and she seemed like a perfectly nice, approachable, respectable person.

"Please, please let me go. I promise I won't tell anyone." Dayna begged and I knew I had to stop him, there was no way on earth I was going to sit here and watch my best friend get shot, not when there was a chance I could stop it.

"I'd love to princess but that's not the way the world works. Since you didn't run I'll make it quick, turn around and get on your knees." She whimpered and sunk to the ground while I edged around the side of the car, sneaking over to the two as quietly as I could while pulling my necklace off, having to put it into use for a second time.

I'd have called the police or just anyone but I would have had to make noise in the silent parking lot and I had about a thirty seconds at most to stop Dayna from being murdered. I'd nearly reached him when I heard the click meaning the gun had been cocked, great, now there's a chance I'll be shot as well.

Dayna who hadn't been looking slowly opened her eyes and they went wide when she saw me creeping up, not knowing what else to do I held my finger to my lips, an age old sign to not say anything.

"Say goodnight s-" Using every ounce of strength in my body I tackled the man, actually managing to take him to the ground with me, starting the fight for the gun with a full intent to kill him if I got given a chance.

"Dayna, run!" I yelled at my friend, she shakily stood up, seeming to have an internal dilemma over whether she should help or listen to me.

"Fucking run, get out of here right now!" I got knocked onto my back and she bolted, running full speed down the alley, she'd be able to get away, she was tall and her legs could carry her quickly away.

There was the cracking sound of a bullet being let loose and I saw Dayna crumple to the ground with a shout. She's still moving, she can't have been hit in a place too severe, that's good. The brief distraction took me away from what was happening for too long and I copped a good smack across the face from the butt of the gun, I've never been hit before, that actually hurts.

"Oh I know you, you're that fucking bitch that's been causing us trouble for months." I took another hit and the world went slightly blurry, this is starting to feel too reminiscent of what happened last time thank you.

Please don't make it that Gerard's gonna show up, I know he hasn't got a gun on him this time and he'll do nothing but get himself in trouble.

"Where's your boyfriend huh? Is he gonna come save you again? Shoot me like he shot my mate? He had to be in hospital for a month ya know?" At least Gee didn't kill anyone, that's gonna make him feel better if I manage to live through this and I'm getting a strong feeling I won't.

"Want to hear something a little special? The boss wants to see you now, he wants to know how the hell you've kept yourself hidden for so long, a stupid fucking teenager that's fooled a organisation of a hundred for five months. We even had the police searching, we almost gave up on you, almost, then your pretty little head pops up again. Lucky huh?" He was basically talking to himself, I'm not planning to say anything if I can help it.

The necklace I'd been holding was knocked from my hand during the scuffle and I attempted to reach from it, feeling the cool metal with the edge of my fingertips, just a bit more and then I can stab him in the face.

My hand closed around the shape and I swung it up cutting the crook from ear to mouth and shoving him off me before delivering a swift kick to the face that should keep him down for a while. I wouldn't be able to grab the gun so I instead ran for Dayna, if I could hide her then I could concern myself with going inside and getting Gerard far, far away from any danger he'd put himself in without thinking.

Dayna was laying on the ground, blood coming from her thigh, as long as the bullet didn't hit an artery she should be good, other than the fact she'll probably need surgery.

"Come on." I grabbed her by the arm and taking advantage of the adrenaline pumping through me, pulled her up off the ground and started walking her quickly towards the end of the alley, there's got to be a shop she can hide in.

The street was basically empty since the music hall was the only thing to attract people to this part of town. An abandoned building with the door boarded up caught my eye and Dayna hobbled with me over to it, she was hardly walking, I might as well be carrying her. Propping her against the wall I kicked the bottom panel out of the door, allowing enough space to crawl in.

"Dayna, I want you to go in there. Don't come out until I tell you it's safe and if I don't come back, call my Mum. Tear something off your shirt, tie it around your thigh. Don't go to the police whatever you do, when you get taken to the hospital don't mention my name or Gerard's. Just say you were walking and you suddenly got shot, okay?" She quickly nodded, starting to tear up and I gave her a hug before helping her to the ground then watching her crawl into the building.

I didn't stick around to say anything else and starting running again, planning on going around the block and getting in through a side entrance. Security guards would still be around, they'd let me inside and worse case scenario I have to smash the front doors of the music hall down.

It took me seconds to figure out thinking and running were a dangerous combo when I smashed into someone, getting the breath knocked out of me. My lips automatically went to apologise but I screamed when recognising the all too familiar face, it was the same guy that almost strangled me to death, the one Gerard had to shoot.

"Hello lovely." Why do these guys have an almost limitless amount of creepy one-liners?

He didn't say anything else and backhanded me across the face hard enough to make me drop to the pavement with my eyes watering, my vision blurry and my ears ringing like I'd been standing too close to a speaker at a concert.

"You're not getting away so easily this time." I was dragged up from the pavement by my hair and couldn't even find the strength to struggle as he pulled me back to the parking lot where his friend was cleaning his face up on my shirt that'd been left on Gee's car.

"Thanks for the rag." The man with the very possibly broken nose said, walking over to me and dropping my shirt on the ground, delivering a vicious grin before delivering an equally vicious blow to my stomach that caused me fall to my knees, they hadn't beaten me up last time, but they hadn't been able to catch me last time, well only one of them did anyway.

Everyone looked up when they heard the squeaking of the back door which was Gerard walking outside, appearing happy for a brief second before he saw the two men standing with me, one holding me by the hair and the other loading a pistol.

"Go back inside!" I shouted at him, hoping I could at least save my boyfriend from being murdered.

Anything else I could have said was silenced when the barrel of a gun was pressed between my eyes, cocked and ready to go off and kill me at any second.

"Don't even think about it, Blondie. Come down here right now or your girlfriend gets it." Not being smart or at least ruthless enough to save himself Gerard walked down the stairs and across the parking lot with the most I was able to do being a look that said 'save yourself'.

"Good." The man with the gun said, closing the gap between him and Gee, not saying anything else he spun the gun around and hit Gerard hard enough that he collapsed on the ground, immediately being knocked out.

I screamed and threw my arm back hard enough to elbow the man who'd been holding me still in the balls. He let go and I ran towards Gerard, he was in this too now and I wasn't going to leave him for anything in the world, even if I had a chance to save myself.

"Gee." I murmured, leaning over him to see if he was okay.

His snow white hair slowly changed as a spot of red leaked out of a cut he got from a rock he landed on. He's gotta be fine, it's just a hit, sure it managed to knock him out but it can't be bad enough to kill him, right?

I brushed his hair back, not caring about myself and just wanting him to be alright. If he cared about me a little less, if he went back inside he would have been fine and this wouldn't have happened, why couldn't he just have listened to me for once.

"Please take him to the hospital," I begged, turning around and looking at the two men, "do whatever you want, kill me, sell me, anything just take him to hospital. Drop him off out the front, anonymously call an ambulance, something. He doesn't deserve this, he wasn't there for the murder, he's only been trying to protect me, let him go." I'd started babbling and crying, Gerard was my weak point, the only weapon able to get through the thick armor I wore most days.

"Even if I wanted to waste my time taking your boyfriend to the hospital, which I definitely don't, I can't." I kept crying, feeling tears make their way down my face as I held on to Gerard even tighter, terrified of what they might do to him, I was gonna get killed at the end of the day and there was ninety percent chance they were going to do the exact same thing to him.

"Why, why not. I know he shot one of you but it was for me, Gerard's nice, he usually wouldn't even consider doing something like that. He won't blab about anything, I can leave a letter, he'll understand. No one has to know about this, I can call his brother, let me do that. You can take me whatever and I can call his brother and his brother can take him to the hospital, please, please let me do that." I continued babbling, being interrupted every five seconds when a sob became too powerful, this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me, I've already lost my Father, please don't make me lose Gerard as well, he means too much.

"The boss wants him as well, we're not talking him anywhere." The ungunned man said firmly, not seeming like he'd be changing his mind anytime soon.

"I've got money, three thousand dollars. I can give you fifteen hundred each, just tell your boss or whatever that you couldn't find Gerard, simple." I'd forced myself to stop crying so I'd come across as much more serious, I wasn't a weakling they could walk over.

"Oh, okay, that changes everything." The taller of the two approached me and as pathetic as it sounds I felt a spark of hope.

"Really?" I whispered.

"No." The last thing I remember seeing was a fist.



I could not stop reading this! Seriously though, I've tried twice cause I need sleep eventually (its now 1am) but this is a really fucking good story


This has always been one of my favorite fanfictions, it's just fantastic.

punkpixie punkpixie

I can't believe its finished... Its so surreal.

.......................................... SEQUAL!!!!!!

funsized funsized


Sad but Rad Sad but Rad

DeAr god that was awesome.
please update!