"Ow, ow, ow." I feel like God hates me. Either that or he enjoys laughing at my pain and misery. Bastard. There's a gnawing little voice in head that's saying, it was a goddamn raindrop, Frankie, not bear repellent, you pansy.

I rub furiously at my eye, while students knock into me with their shoulders, glaring as if it were my fault they didn't have the courtesy to, I don't know, move around me? Use their fucking brains, Christ.

By now, my eye felt huge and swollen, leaking with salty water. I had also so coincidentally chosen to go with the red and black eyeliner combo this day, and there was no doubt in my mind that the stickiness on the knuckle I had just used to massage my eye was not only tears. I must look like someone took a massive hit to my face...

"Well, well, well. Someone beat us to getting the little fag.” There's the crack of knuckles then the shuffling of feet as they draw nearer, and I don't even bother to turn around.

If there's something I don't like, it's backing down and letting go. I'm not going to wither away and die only because someone wants me to. To hell with that, I'm fucking fighting back. They aren't going to break me down that easily. If I'm going to go down, I'm taking them down with me and if not, I'm leaving damage.

"Hey, hey, hey, Matt. You waited for me after the bell? How sweet. Oh! And you brought your friends." I grin a bit, watching as his expression contorts with disgust and his friends start closing in on me, pushing me into a corner, him leading.

"So, Jack. Heard you got a new fuck friend. What, Toro wasn't enough to fill your needs? Or do you want both of them, faggot?" He inched even more still, so close I could see the freckles that sprinkled over his cheeks. His friends were jeering along with him and I stood quietly for a moment. Then I lowered my eyes to my feet shyly.

"Why do you care, Matt," I said, feigning coyness, following up by staring back up at him through my eyelashes and stepping even closer to him, lips to ear, "Do you have needs too?"

I heard him stutter angrily, but before he could react, I slammed my knee to his family jewels, kicked his friends in the shins and sped off into one direction. I heard the chorus of their echo off the abandoned hallways, but I still made a sharp turn to another. I wasn't going to make it easy for them to run after me.

There are a multitude of things that are usually unknown to the public school kids, as to private school. But the most stereotypical belief that is the most untrue:

Everyone is all virtuous and kind and I don’t know, fucking future nuns and priest, Christ.

As I've been experiencing, Matt, for example, isn't as innocent as he let's all the school believe. But of course, when your family pays the big bucks, why are they going to do? Tell them to take their money and fuck off because of the "zero tolerance" policy? No, they can't. Like they give a shit about the little gay boy bleeding inside their bathroom stalls. No one ever does.

There's so much more. The girl kicked to the ground because she wasn’t skinny enough that there were gaps between her thighs. The little kid who gets pushed off the swings. The little boy with glasses who has to do twice as much homework because the other kids think he's smart. The disabled little girl who was born with not enough oxygen, and because of that she people treat her as if she were nothing. Overall, it’s as bad as public school and if not, it's worse.

Here they blame the fact that God wanted you to suffer this way.

I stop once I get to the small patch of grass right off campus. It's good to stay close enough so that they can see you do "ungodly" things and but not close enough that they can do anything about it. Sister Dominique is my favorite. Her eye gets all twitchy and it looks like it takes all of her strength not to start screaming as I smoke whatever on the grass. She always ruins the fun when she crosses herself and disappears into the office.

I'm lighting my cigarette; lighter looking overly bright in its purple color in the light fog of the misty scenery. Taking a long drag, I'm wondering what my life would be like if I was Frank, not Jack.

Maybe Mom and Dad would still be together, I thought, feeling lost. I didn't like my mom alone in the house. Jobs were scarce and currently she was trying to make do with some fresh goods she sold here and there. Dad was, well, Dad. But I lost all respect for him when he left Mom and me during the toughest of times. 'Till death do us part, my ass.

I'm worried. Our funds are getting small, the world has gone to shit, and my life sucks. I guess worried isn't the best world for it. But I don't think there's a word for, Fuck-my-life-I-want-to-die-but-I-also-want-to-live, unless that's that exactly.

The bell rings unexpectedly, and students rush out into the parking lot. Deciding I'm okay sitting, I wait for Ray, searching the body of teenagers for the giant head of hair that is my best friend. I find a newly familiar Ginger-head and I spring up to my feet.

"Bobert!" I wave both arms above my head wildly, happy to see Ray next to him, crazy clown-ass smile stapled to his face. I push through the crowd, jumping on Bob's back for the hell of it, and laughing as he swings me off, "Ray, you've met the rock!" I notice Bob's hoodie is missing, it's not surprising, the nuns are really strict when it comes to the dress codes. He's only wearing the stupid button-up long-sleeve, though, and I feel freezing just looking at his exposed forearms where he pushed up the cuffs. A chilly wind rips through my blazer.

"Yeah. I guess." Ray answers, elbowing me in the ribs while I counter by trying to claw at his hands, "Whoa! What happened to your face?"

"What happened to your face, Toro?" I say, then giggle and continue, "I've been rubbin my eyeball, which is succeeding at pissing me off, along with this stupid eyeliner I chose to wear today."

Bob takes one look at me, grabs his backpack from behind him, and pulls out a packet of baby wipes.

"Here," he hands me a few, and he catches twisted expression and supplies, "You never know when you need baby wipes. You never do."

Ray then proceeds to give me a look that says, 'If this guy's insane, I'm blaming you, Antonio,' which I counter with, 'Bob's fucking awesome, you're just a wuss,' and try for, 'My name isn't even Antonio, it's Iero,' but Ray totally misinterprets it and gives me a look of horror instead of understanding. I sigh, the kind of sigh no one will ever know the meaning of in my whole life. Ray offers me one more fleeting look, then turns away from me, shuddering. Bob gives us a both a, 'what the fuck did I miss, guys, I was just putting away my baby wipes when I saw Frank looking like creep at Ray.' Okay, truthfully, I don't really know if he's thinking that, but it's kinda amazing how his facial muscles form into those exact words in non-verbal form.

I grin and look around the campus, "So... Anyone have a ride home?"

Bob shakes his head, and I know Ray doesn't have one. Guess we're truckin it today.

Right on cue, the rain starts pelting my back in icy bullets. Well. Shit.

"Aw, shit!" Ray says, expressing my exact feelings as he stares up into the sky, swearing as one hits him right in his cornea, "Guys! It's acid rain!?"

I swear, and then run down the street towards the Safeway, Ray following closely, and Bob trudging along, refusing to run after me.

"Right so, let’s see. We have enough for bus fare?" I say, watching as Ray makes a sound that reminds me of a bird getting a bath from a water sprayer bottle. And I know exactly what that means, "You got jumped and gave all your money to those assholes...?" I pause and my fist balls up when he nods sadly.

"I got money." We both turn to Bob, who's holding up ten bucks, "We can get the assholes later."

"Dude. You're awesome." He shrugs; I recognize this as a habit of his.

"I know."

And we all loiter in front of Safeway, a close distance to the bus stop that is strategically placed out in the pouring rain, and wait.

At this I begin to wonder if it was the raindrop. Maybe it wasn't.

Maybes suck.

Notes

Hey guys. Sorry for the delay, but my time as a fanfiction writer is seriously shrinking due to problems I can't easily explain to you, such as growing up - a notion which sucks by the way.
If you look up this story on Mibba, the whole installment is there (or at least as much as I have written it). I'll probably upload the rest of the chapters soon...so. Yeah.
Thanks for commenting! I really appreciate it. :)
-S

P.S. - if you do check out the longer version on Mibba, please ignore the weird layout, I fucked with the settings and then the website just gave up. Gah, sorry. D: