She Always Gets What She Wants

I walked into the Way house where I was so supposed to meet up with the Way brothers before we went out to celebrate. It felt like lately we were always celebrating, but that was a good thing, because it meant that everything was going our way. We were making a success of My Chemical Romance and no one in the world was more proud than I was.

We had just returned from the first part of our tour. We were in desperate need of some good food, proper sleep and a shower. I had already taken care of most of the above, although I still needed plenty of sleep before feeling like a person again and, if you listened to my mother, I was way too skinny. That was exactly what Gerard and Mikey were probably doing right now, taking showers.

I was cool with waiting though and when no one answered the door, I walked right inside. The living room seemed to be the best place to wait. At least it had a television, since I had no idea how long I would be waiting. Mikey might still need to straighten his hair and that could take a while, or maybe Gerard will need to touch up his make up or something.

Just as I entered the living room, I noticed a pretty blonde seated on one of the couches with earphones in. My insides turned and not in an uncomfortable way. It would be a lie to say that I didn’t miss her. She looked up as I entered and looked startled to see me there.

“Frank?” She reached up and pulled out the earphones, turning off the music as she did so. She looked around the room awkwardly before making eye contact with me. “Hi.”

There was no point in turning around now. Instead I decided to be a grown up and I sat down on one of the other couches. “How have you been?” I enquired, really just making small talk, because I didn’t know what else to talk about.

“I’ve been great. How about you?”

“The same.” This was definitely the worst conversation I have ever had in my life, which was odd considering neither one of us had ever been at a loss for something to say.

“A lot has happened since the last time we spoke. I guess that’s a given. It’s been almost four months,” Brittany noted. I looked at her surprised. It really has been a long time. We haven’t talked since that fateful night that it all blew up. “I finally left New Jersey,” Brittany informed me, interrupting my thoughts. “I decided to go to NYU after all. There’s no point in wasting a perfectly good sponsorship. My uncle was kind enough to offer to pay.”

“That’s great news. I know how much you wanted to go. And how’s the student life treating you?”

“Great!” She exclaimed with a smile. “I have to work harder now that I’m there, but I’ve joined some campus organizations and I’ve made some new friends who are amazing.”

I listened intently, happy to hear that she was doing well. “I’m really glad to hear that.”

She looked great. Her hair was slightly shorter and definitely blonder than before. She seemed changed, considering how calmly she was handling the situation, even the breakup if I had to be honest. She never made any excuses for what she did. She had simply confessed and then apologized. Maybe she was growing up after all and growing as a person.

“Speaking of friends,” she continued, shifting slightly forward in her seat. “Kasey finally told her mom about Jill.”

My eyes grew wide. “How did she take it?”

“Actually she told her entire family,” Brittany corrected her statement. “They had some family lunch or something and she just decided “fuck it”, you know? So she took Jill as her date and surprised everyone.”

I couldn’t believe my ears, because that was damn brave of her. I commended her for it. She did the right thing. Her family would have to learn to accept her for who she is.

“It was more like a shock to everyone, but for the most part they’ve come around. Her brother accepted it right off the bat. He was happy for them. Her dad took some time, but he recently took them both out for lunch so he seems to be cool with it now.”

“And her mother?”

Brittany shook her head. “She’s still a work in progress.”

“That sucks. For Kasey I mean. Her mom should wake up and deal with it.”

“I know, but let’s talk about you. Gerard says you guys are doing great?”

I relaxed back into the couch. “Yeah, things are moving along. At the rate things are going, we’ll be rock stars in no time.” I chuckled. “I’m just kidding. We’re still kind of just working on getting our music out there and it’s not easy. People won’t buy your stuff unless you make a name for yourself and you can’t make a name for yourself unless people buy your stuff. It’s a bit of a vicious cycle. Right now we’re mostly playing for other bands’ fans and hoping that something good will come of it. We’ve actually sold some albums on the tour. I guess that’s a good sign.”

“Yes, definitely.”

We were back to an awkward silence with two pairs of eyes moving around the room in search of something to talk about or simply in order to avoid eye contact.

“I’m really sorry about the way things turned out,” Brittany suddenly apologized, unexpectedly diving right in at the deep end. “We never actually got to talk about it and I still don’t want to make any excuses. I just wanted to tell you again that I’m sorry.”

For some unexplainable reason I suddenly felt guilty, but then I reminded myself that I hadn’t done anything wrong. If she had wanted to work things out, she should have tried harder. However, I was glad that she hadn’t. Maybe she would have succeeded and I would have forgiven her in order for us to go back to the way things were only for it all to happen again. The end of our relationship had arrived at the right time and it had been for the best… for both of us.

“That’s okay. I’m over it and we’re both doing great. All’s well that ends well.”

“I guess. You were wrong though.”

I looked up, wondering what she meant.

“I don’t always get what I want. I didn’t get you. Frank, I wanted you.” She looked right at me while she made this confession. She clearly meant every word.

This entire conversation seemed unnecessary. On the other hand, we most likely needed the closure. “I wanted you too. It just wasn’t… we were never going to work out.”

“At least we were good for a little while.”

“We were, weren’t we?” I said, smiling thoughtfully, remembering all the good times. Brittany returned my smile and it felt good to be able to talk to her like this again. Talking was a good idea. Now we could properly move on, on good foot with one another. Hell, now there was a possibility of us being friends. I couldn’t help a laugh escaping from my lips at the thought. I never thought the idea would cross my mind and yet there it was.

“What’s so funny?” Brittany was still smiling.

“Nothing. Just the two of us.”

“Hey, Frank, sorry we’re taking so long,” Gerard apologized, coming into the room. He paused when he noticed the two of us sitting there. “Okay, did I miss something?”

“We were just talking,” Brittany told him, getting to her feet. “You guys should have fun tonight. I’ll be seeing you, Frank.”

“Bye,” I said, offering her one last smile.

“What was that all about?” Gerard wanted to know, sitting down next to me in order to put on his socks and shoes.

“Nothing. We talked.”

“About?” He was extremely curious.

“Stuff,” I smiled secretively.

It was obvious from his facial expression that he was dying to know more, but he gave up trying to get it out of me and instead got a smile of his own. “Well, at least you’re both still alive so I’ll take that as a good sign.”

*

“Hey, can I bum a cigarette?”

The New Jersey air was cool and refreshing after being in the bar for so long. It was quiet in comparison to the ruckus inside the bar too. Everyone was still inside. I just needed a bit of fresh air. Of course fresh air did not exclude lighting a cigarette. I turned to the female voice asking the question.

“Sure.” I fished my cigarettes back out of my pocket and pulled one out.

“No! I’ll take that.” Another woman interjected, grabbing the cigarette I was holding out to her from my hand. “She’s quitting.”

“Oh.” I looked from one to the other, the first female looking frustrated.

“I know you’re trying to do me a favour, but I really hate you right now,” she stated, glaring at her friend.

“You’ll get over it,” the latter muttered. “I’m going back inside.”

I chuckled lightly at the scenario. “You’re a better person than I am. I would never have the resolve to quit.”

“Neither do I obviously,” she grumbled, standing next to me. People were coming and going to and from the bar while we stood there enjoying the night air. I glanced at her as I took a drag from my cigarette and realized that she looked extremely familiar, although I couldn’t quite put my finger on where I knew her from.

“Summer camp,” she said as if she could read my mind. “1995.”

“Oh yeah, I remember!” I grinned broadly, thinking back to the year Gerard and I had went to summer camp. We had a blast that summer and it also held some drama. “Chloe right?” She nodded also smiling. “You and Gerard were like the biggest enemies.” I giggled at the memory.

“How is Way?”

“Great. He’s actually inside if you would rather ask him yourself?” I motioned towards the entrance.

“That’s okay.” She bounced a little on the balls of her feet, hands linked behind her back like a kid who was caught in the act of breaking a vase or something.

“It’s been seven years.”

“I know.” She still had the same midnight black hair I remembered, although it was much longer now. She hadn’t gotten much taller. For the most part she still looked the same, only older of course. “It took me a week to properly rinse the baby oil from my hair.”

“It was a joke, but you couldn’t just let it go, could you? I thought for sure that one of you would have killed the other by the end of camp.”

“Unfortunately there’s only so much you can do with red hair dye and food products.”

I burst out laughing again. “Oh shit, yeah, I remember. The counsellors were super pissed when you guys started that food fight and your hair dye plan totally backfired. Gerard kept the red for a long time after the camp ended.”

“I know.”

“To be honest, I thought you guys were only sabotaging each other because you liked each other.”

Chloe looked down at her feet. “Maybe a little.” She smiled back up at me. “Although back then I never would have admitted it,” she hurriedly added that last part. “Besides, it was all your fault. Don’t think I didn’t know that it was you who had started all of it.”

“What?” I couldn’t hide the guilt in my voice.

“That exploding balloon. I knew it was you.”

“Then why go after Gerard?”

“He made it easy and it was fun. Besides, like you just said, maybe I might have liked him a little back then.”

“Oh, I know you liked him,” I smirked evilly. “Why else would the two of you hook up behind our cabin?”

She gasped, looking at me indignantly. “He told you??”

“Hell no!” I made a face. “I saw you guys. No, you’re the only girl he never told me about.”

“Hm.” She smiled, looking smug at that little piece of information.

“Hey, Frank! This is where you disappeared to,” Gerard said, stepping outside. “Come inside. Ray is about to win the darts competition and Mikey is making some money off the pool table.”

“I’ll be right there,” I told him and he returned inside. “That’s what you get for spending way too much time in bars, a couple of guys who are way too good at bar games.”

“I take it the two of you are still attached at the hip,” Chloe guessed.

“Is there any other way?” I asked with a smile. “You’re more than welcome to join us.”

“I’m actually on my way. I have work tomorrow morning. How about this?” She dug around her purse which was about as big as a wallet. I couldn’t see how she could fit anything in there much less find it. She pulled out an eyeliner pencil and proceeded to grab my hand, pulling my arm closer. “I trust you’ll call,” she said as she wrote her phone number on my forearm. “We’ll talk or meet up or whatever.” The pencil was deposited back inside the tiny purse and she smiled at me. “It was good to see you again, Frank Iero. Tell Gerard I send my love.”

“Sure.” I watched her walk across the street and get into a car, disappearing. “Sure,” I smiled to myself, glancing at her number before heading back inside the bar to rejoin my friends.

Notes