Fantastic Bastards in Monroeville (Frerard)

I can’t tell you how many interesting stories I’ve heard at therapy so far. Jimmy believes he’s the antichrist, while Pete and Patrick (the guys that were eating soup together in the dining room when I first got into this nuthouse) both believe that they were abducted by aliens. I swear, I’ve been trying my damndest throughout the whole session to keep myself from pissing myself out of laughter. I’ve already received too many dirty looks because of it, especially by Dr. Haycraft, but I could care less. The only person I won’t laugh hearing from is Frank. I’m curious to hear what he has to say, no matter how ludicrous it might be. He’s next to talk.
“I’m Frank Iero,” he smiled warmly, starting off. “On a scale of one to ten...I’m a ten!”
“Oh, that’s great!” Dr. Haycraft chimed in. “Can you tell us why you’re in such a good mood?”
“Well...I have a new roommate, and his name is Gerard!” Frank exclaimed, pointing right to me next to his seat, making me blush a bit. “He’s so nice to me! He’s such a good friend. Now that I’m out of my old room, Gerard will protect me, and I won’t be dealing with any spiders no more!”
“That’s good to hear, Frank,” Dr. Haycraft nodded, writing down some notes, probably about Frank’s delusions of the spiders. “So you haven’t been seeing any spiders since you left your old room, hmmm?”
“Nope. Not one. Isn’t that great? I know my daddy would be happy to hear that there aren’t any more of them,” Frank turned to me, still smiling widely. “Plus I’m positive he’d be happy to hear that I made a new friend. Right, Gerard?”
Before I could even nod, someone suddenly bursted out into laughter, like they just heard the best joke ever cracked. All heads turned to find that it’s Bob, his face red and scrunched up from laughing so much. I glared at him, knowing that he could only be up to no good, being the jerk he can be.
“What’s so funny?” Frank asked, his happy bubble already popped.
“Frank...your dad wouldn’t be happy for you at all. We all know he doesn’t give a rat’s ass about you,” Bob sneered. “So cut the crap, Freaky Frank. Even your own mom thinks you’re nuts,”
The whole room went deathly quiet after Bob spoke. Right next to him, Ray gasped, floored by what he just heard come out of his friend’s mouth. Dr. Haycraft’s jaw nearly dropped to the ground. As for me, I’m now fuming with anger. How dare he say that to Frank--
“No, you’re a liar!” Frank hissed, his gaze ice cold. “My daddy loves me! I talk to him every day!”
“How so?” Bob asked mockingly.
“The chip in my head!” Frank pointed to the side of his head, in the same exact spot where I found the scar. “Before mom sent me here, daddy implanted a chip into my head so that I can communicate with him! The reason why I haven’t been able to see him at all is because he’s busy at work all the time. When he finally gets time off, he’ll pick me up and get me the hell outta here, and we’ll live together!”
“Yeah, right...freak!” Bob laughed. “God, you’re so delusional. No wonder your mom dumped you here! We all know the truth about your dad. He didn’t love you, Frank. He hated your guts. He beat you up so bad he put your ass in a coma, and--”
“Bob, that’s enough!” Dr. Haycraft yelled, her voice venomous. It was already too late, though. The damage had already been done; Frank was already weeping into his hands, his sobs similar to that of an upset baby. I growled at Bob, already feeling my whole body shaking with rage. I’ve never been one to start fights, but god, do I wanna punch him right in the face…
“You’re a liar, Bob! You’re a fucking liar!” Frank stood up from his seat, storming out of the room and down the hall, his cries loud and booming, echoing in my head.
“Wait, Frank! Come back!” Dr. Haycraft called out, but to no avail. She can’t stop him...but I can. I stood up and ran after him, not at all caring if I get written up for skipping out on therapy. I’ve got a friend to be there for. Dr. Haycraft stood up and yelled at me to come back, but I didn’t even take a second to stop and think. I just ran, darting down the hall to find him. I already have an idea where he’s headed off to.
I turned the hallway and ran to my room, where I found Frank curled up in a fetal position on his bed, weeping into his pillow. I wanna call out to him. I wanna tell him everything’s okay, and to not listen to what Bob said about him. I wanna tell him so much to reassure him...but all I can really do is just hold him, which is exactly what I did, walking up to him and taking him into my arms. He didn’t even resist. When he saw me, he clung onto me with his dear life, his whole body shaking and helpless.
“I want my daddy!” he whined, sniffling into my shirt. “Why would Bob say that to me? None of what he said was true. He’s...he’s just a big fat meanie!”
As much I hate Bob for hurting Frank like that, I’m almost starting to think that there is indeed something more to all of this. What if Bob was actually right, as much as I hate to admit it? I know for a fact there’s no chip planted into Frank’s head, and anyone with a sound enough mind would know that. Was Frank’s dad really abusive towards him? Was he the one that gave Frank the stitches in his head? It’s all something to worth ask. I know I’m not gonna get answers from Frank, though. I’ve gotta look for them from someone else.
“Gerard...can you please do me a favor?” Frank asked, looking up at me with his teary eyes. “Can you...stay with me?”
Looks like searching for answers will have to wait. Frank needs me. He doesn’t need someone to comfort him and make the pain go away. He just needs someone there with him. I nodded, lying down next to him and wrapping my arms around his shaking body. Frank buried his face into my chest and cried, mewling and sniffling in my shirt. Now more than ever, I want to speak for him. I would tell him that he can stay here with me as long as he wants, and that I’ll always be there when he needs a shoulder to cry on. I’d speak for no one else but him. He’s worth it. If only I could open my mouth and say those words to him…

_ _ _
Frank ended up falling asleep on me, spending the rest of the evening lying next to me. He’d done so much crying that it wore him out. As much as I’d let him do that, I had to get up and get myself dressed and ready for bed. I know that the attendees would sooner or later be peeking into the little windows on our rooms to check up on us when we’re supposed to be in bed, and I don’t wanna raise any suspicions. When the attendees did finally check up on us, I laid in my own bed, pretending to be asleep. After they went away, I went straight to Frank’s bed, cuddling up right next to him. I can tell by how much he’s been tossing and turning that he’s struggling to sleep soundly. It wasn’t long before he soon woke up, gasping a little. He looked up at me, relieved.
“Sorry, Gerard...just a bad dream,” he sighed. I nodded, figuring that was the case. I smiled as I looked into his eyes, the world inside of them welcoming me into them once again, a world so warped and mesmerizing and disastrous and beautiful. I’ve barely touched the surface discovering it, but I want to run right in and chase whatever nightmare was taking place in it. However, running into dangerous territory is nothing short of foolish.
“Mmmmm…,” Frank moaned, leaning forward and curling up next to me, his body no longer tense. He’s just so cold, though...and it’s not that chilly in this room. I’m actually sweating. “You’re so warm, Gee...oh!” Frank perked his head up, blushing. “Sorry...Gerard,”
I shook my head, not at all minding him calling me by something other than my real name. He can call me whatever the hell he wants. I really don’t fucking mind. I just wanna hold him and be with him. That’s all that matters…
Frank suddenly gasped, backing away from me like I just threatened him. I felt my heart drop into my stomach. What did I do? Frank’s wide eyes stared down below me, where I looked…
Oh no...my scars! I forgot to cover them up…
Goddamnit. How could I have forgotten? I wouldn’t want Frank to see these as much as the nosy nurses and attendees. What the hell is wrong with me? That’s it. I fucked up…
“Gee...what did you...oh my god…,” Frank covered his mouth with both hands, dismayed by what’s in front of him. I hung my head in shame, feeling like a failure. Frank didn’t need to see this...but it’s too late. He must think low of me for doing such a thing to myself. I bled for someone that’s no longer a part of my life, and these are my wounds of war. Who on earth besides Lindsey would wanna be with someone that hurts himself?
I’m sorry, Frank…
I nearly fell back when I felt Frank’s weight on me, pushing me back and holding me in a tight embrace. I felt a pang in my chest, Frank’s body shaking immensely with his arms wrapped around me. I can hear him crying. He’s crying...for me?
“Oh, Gee…,” he sniffled, looking up at me. “I’m so sorry, Gee...you’re too precious to do this to yourself, but...you’re not alone…,”
Frank pulled up the sleeves of his shirt, revealing an array of old scars covering his arms, all discolored and deep into his tainted skin. My eyes widened, completely floored by what the hell I’m seeing.
What...why, Frank? Why do you do this to yourself? You’re better than that! You’re too beautiful to taint yourself like this!
“You see, Gee...I…,” Frank gulped, his body still visibly shaking. “As you can see, I used to cut myself, being the fool I was. I always felt so numb that I had to inflict pain upon myself to feel something. When my mom found out that I was cutting, she wasn’t very happy, and neither was my daddy. It was so hard for me to stop, but I was eventually able to do so. I did it because I knew my daddy would hate to see me do something like this to myself. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I feel your pain,”
I smiled sadly as Frank told me his story about his cutting. If only it was that easy for me to stop. I also always feel so numb, and cutting myself was a sweet release of those inner feelings for me. I also had to do it for someone that encouraged it, and now she’s gone…
“Will you stop cutting yourself please? I hate to see you do this to yourself. You’re the guy that’s supposed to protect me from the spiders, and I hate to see yourself get hurt. Please do it for me, Gee?” Frank pleaded, giving me a puppy-eyed look. I looked down at my scarred arms and gulped. I don’t know if I could do that. I’m sick of feeling numb all the time. I need to feel something. Maybe what I need to do is feel something different than pain. But what exactly? I don’t know, but maybe, Frank could help me find that. I smiled and nodded. Frank smiled back and took me into another bone-crushing hug. I’ll admit that it’s gonna be hard for me to stop cutting, but I’m gonna try my best…
“I’m really not that tired, Gee. Are you?” Frank asked. I shook my head. I am wide awake, much to my surprise. I don’t think it’s that late either; my best guess is that it’s like 10:30 or something. A clock could be helpful. “What should we do?”
I thought for a little while. There really wasn’t much to do in this room. If only we weren’t confined to them at a certain time. An idea suddenly came to mind. I thought up a way to make Frank laugh. I made a silly face, stretching out my mouth. It apparently worked. Frank was laughing hysterically, his voice echoing throughout the room. I shushed Frank, hoping that the attendees and other patients would hear us. Frank then made a silly face of his own, his tongue wagging around. I almost peed myself as I snickered, catching myself snorting a little, which made the both of us laugh even harder.
“You’re funny,” Frank said. “That’s one of the millions of things I like about you,”
Okay, Frank must be bluffing right now. What was there to like about me? I’m just a fat nobody. I’m no one special. I turned my head to the side, curious as to why Frank would like someone like me.
“Well, you’re very nice, that’s for sure,” Frank replied. “And….you listen, too. Everyone else in this place thinks I’m crazy. Not you, though. You give me reassurance that I’m not alone. No one else gives me that. Not Dr. Haycraft, or Ray, or anyone else...except for you. You hear me out, and for that, I thank you,”
I smiled at Frank sadly. It would be rude to call Frank crazy. Frank’s not well. I think that’s a nicer way to put it. However, he is right about one thing. He needs someone that’ll just sit and listen to him. Nobody else would do that, except maybe Dr. Haycraft, but she gets paid to do that.
“What’s wrong?” Frank asked, staring at me in curiosity. I shook my head, brushing the problem off. I made another silly face with my eyes, which sent Frank into another laughing frenzy. “Oh my god, I’ll never get sick of you. You are too funny, Gee!”
Frank opened up his arms and wrapped me into yet another hug. I graciously accepted it, rubbing Frank’s back. I never want him to let go. He smells so good too. After what seemed like a long time, we parted from each other and smiled into each other’s eyes.
“Well, Gee. What should we talk about? The night is still young,”
I looked down, thinking about what there was to talk about. Maybe a little juicy gossip wouldn’t hurt. Thankfully, I knew sign language from teaching myself. I don’t know why I did. I guess I was bored, but now it really came in handy. Through my sign language, I suggested to Frank that we talk about the other patients and staff.
“Holy shit, Gee...you know sign language?” Frank said, his eyes lighting up with glee. “I know sign language too! How did you learn to do that?”
After telling Frank how I taught myself, Frank did the same through his non-verbal speech, saying that he used to take classes when he worked with deaf kids. We began our gossiping session, first talking about Jimmy and how he believes he’s the antichrist, then about Pete and Patrick believing that they were abducted by aliens. I asked on why Ray was in this place. Frank told me it’s because of his anxiety, depression, and alcoholism. I used to drink a lot, but stopped when I Lindsey told me that it made me fatter. Frank went on to say that Ray is a nice guy and is the only other patient that’s nice to him. He also said that he heard a rumor that Ray is gonna be transferred to another institution called Kingwood, rumored to be an even stricter and higher security place than here. I found that a little hard to believe. Ray seems like one of the more saner people in this godforsaken place. I guess I shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover.
“I’m getting a little sleepy,” Frank said, yawning. “I think I’m gonna call it a night, if that’s alright,”
I nodded, getting up from Frank’s bed and heading back to my own. I would’ve definitely slept with Frank, but I don’t wanna risk getting caught by one of the attendees. That would spell disaster for us. I said goodnight through my sign language and got under the covers. It wasn’t long before I heard Frank snoring. It wasn’t loud and obnoxious. It was soft and rhythmic, even soothing. I shut my eyes, hoping that I could fall asleep just as fast as Frank.

Notes