Bulletproof Heart

Frank’s POV

I woke up and found a pair of arms round me and I could hear the tv on.
”Mum please, he’s had a really shit day and I don’t want him to be alone right now.” I heard someone say and I felt them sigh against my back.
”Honestly I’m being a friend right now, kinda need to make it up to him as I said really horrible things to him.” The person said who I worked out to be Gerard.
”I highly doubt that will happen mum. Now get back to work before they sack you for given your son a sex talk over the phone. Which by the way I don’t need since I lost it a long time ago.” Gerard said.
”Ew I should not be having this conversation with you. Now bugger off and do some work woman. I’ll see you later.” Gerard said and I rolled over to face Gerard and cuddled into his chest and I felt Gerard mess with my hair which made me smile.
”Love you too mum.” Gerard said and he hung up and threw his phone onto the bed and he got comfy again and he made me look at him.

”How you feeling now?” Gerard asked quietly.
”A bit better, my hand hurts a lot though.” I said quietly and Gerard smiled slightly
“Want me to look at them again for you? Maybe put a bandage on it?” Gerard asked softly and I nodded feeling sorry for myself which made Gerard chuckle.
”Okay, sit up then and I can look at it and clean it again and bandage it.” Gerard said and I reluctantly moved from his side and sat up while Gerard reached over and got the stuff from earlier and he sat up and sat in front of me.
”Left hand, since it isn’t that bad.” Gerard said softly and I gave him my left hand.
”If I dress these, you need to make sure that you change the dressing everyday.” Gerard said.
“But nobody will see my tattoos.” I said and Gerard chuckled.
”So you care more about your tattoos than your hands getting infected.” Gerard said.
”Hey, these tattoos cost money, I want to show them off.” I said.
”Well maybe you shouldn’t of punched a mirror then you wouldn’t have both your hands covered in cuts and having to wear a bandage.” Gerard said and I looked down but Gerard made me look at him.
”But you did decide to punch a mirror and for that you have to pay the price in hiding your tattoos until your cut heal.” Gerard said as he started to wipe my hand which made me hiss since it was still really sore and Gerard was lucky that he could touch my hands.
”Sorry, I did say it would hurt.” Gerard said and I looked at him.
”No you didn’t.” I said and Gerard smiled a little.
”Well you can sort off guess that it would hurt you dummy.” Gerard said and I smiled at him and I watched him clean my hand and start dressing it.

”Your so good at this.” I said quietly and Gerard chuckled quietly.
”When you was a self harming 15 year old boy and your boyfriend abused you on a daily basis you learn how to deal with your injuries without going to hospital unless it was needing stitches or something else.” Gerard said quietly.
I looked down at Gerard’s arms and the scars on his arms showed how bad his self harming actually got. I looked up at Gerard and noticed a scar on his neck I never noticed before so I reached out to see if Gerard would allow me to touch it which he didn’t but I understood.
”It wasn’t me who put the scar there.” Gerard said quietly and I looked at him.
”Who did?” I asked before I could stop myself.
”The same person who put the scars on my chest. Only that time he was actually going to kill me.” Gerard said quietly and stopped dressing my hand.
”Can we not talk about it. Today brought loads of flashbacks back and it’s really getting to me.” Gerard whispered as he looked down.
”Gee I’m so sorry.” I said quietly and made Gerard look at me.
“When I saw you punch him over and over it reminded me of when he punched me over and over until I was almost dead.” Gerard started to say but the rest came out in a sobbing mess which broke my heart and I pulled him into my chest being careful of my hands and held him close.
”I am so sorry I cause all this Gee, if I could take it all back then I would.” I said and kissed the top of Gerard head and Gerard kept on crying into my chest.
”I’m sorry I called you a pikey.” Gerard sobbed as he pulled back and looked down.
”Its fine, it’s not as if your the first person to call me it.” I said and Gerard nodded and sniffed.
”Want me to carry on with your hand.” Gerard said quietly.
”You need to stop crying as I think your tears will hurt just as bad as the wipes.” I said and Gerard chuckled with a small smile on his face.
”If you get any urges to hurt yourself then you can talk me you know.” I said and Gerard nodded and looked at me and I reached out and wiped the tears from his face which made Gerard lean into my touch and he smile a shy smile at me which I returned.
”I know.” Gerard whispered which made me smile more.
“Let me carry on with your hand.” Gerard whispered and he sniffed loudly and picked my right hand up and started to clean and bandage it.

Me and Gerard was lead in bed after ordering pizza and eating it downstairs.
”If I told you I have mental health problems would it make you want to run away?” Gerard asked and you could hear the sadness in his voice when he said it.
I looked at Gerard and kissed his forehead and traced my finger up and down his cheek bone as I looked at him which Gerard started to do but then looked away.
”I wouldn’t run Gee, I would make sure that you will always be okay.” I said and Gerard nodded slightly.
”I have to leave for that sentencing tomorrow, but I don’t want to go.” Gerard sniffed.
”Baby you have to go because you will feel like a bit of weight has been lifted from your shoulders.” I said and Gerard looked at me.
”Everyone said that when he went to jail. But it hasn’t Frank, if anything everything has gotten worse.” Gerard said as he looked down and I followed his eye and noticed him starching himself so I put my hand on top of his which made Gerard look at me.
”Everything is going to okay. You’ve got me and your mum supporting you through this and we’re not going to leave you to fight this on your own.” I said and pulled Gerard into my chest.
I sighed loudly and started to mess with Gerard’s hair.
”I really really like you Gee.” I said quietly and Gerard sighh loudly as well.
”I really like you too, but I’m not ready for a relationship.” Gerard said quietly.
I lead myself down with Gerard on my chest and I made him look at me.
”You have given so much of your life to the cunt who abused you. I know me saying get over it and it’s all in the past won’t help you but you need to stop worrying that everyone is going to be like your ex.” I said and Gerard nodded slightly as if he was weighing up his options.
”If I do say I want a relationship with you, you promise that you will never hurt me and understand that I need to take things slow. As well as having these physical scars you can see, I have so many mental scars that you can’t see. I meant it when I said I was broken.” Gerard said and I just smiled and kissed him which Gerard returned.
”I promise I won’t hurt you and I will treat you like a king. As long as I can be with you I don’t care about taking it slowly.” I said and Gerard smiled as he looked down with a slight blush on his cheek.
“So do you want to be with me?” I asked and Gerard smiled widely at me and nodded as he moved and kissed me a bit harder than what I’ve been kissing him.
”I would love to be with you Frank.” Gerard said quietly and I smiled and kissed Gerard again and he got himself comfy on my side.
”But we still need to talk about what you did. But not right now though. Also I was wondering if you could come with me and mum to the sentencing.” Gerard said and I sighed again.
”Okay to the talk, I’ll ask my mam but she’ll normally say yes but I’ll be happy to come with you.” I said and Gerard smiled as he got comfy and we started to watch a film until we both fell asleep.

Notes

Another chapter I’m not sure about...