Phobia

Socio•pho•bia

Noun

An extreme or irrational fear of interacting with another person, usually a stranger of new interest.



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"You're not supposed to be doing that." Mikey told his older brother gently as he watched him draw on the paper napkin placed next to his breakfast plate.

Gerard ignored his pesky little brother and continued to doodle the butterfly on his ketchup stained napkin, grumbling, "Go play in the meadow with Pete or something, he was asking for you earlier."

"I'm just trying to look out for you." Mikey replied taking the fork off of his plate and poking around at his scrambled eggs, ignoring everything Gerard had said. He pushed his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose with his opposite hand, never turning his gaze from his white haired sibling, "What are you even drawing, Gee?"

Gerard paused and twiddled his pen between his fingers, "Butterfly."

Mikey dipped his head in a tiny nod. He didn't say anything further. He didn't understand his brother, he was only eleven after all. There was a great age difference between them which sometimes made it hard for the two to become close with each other. Mikey still tried his hardest though, no matter how much his brother didn't want to be around him. It was ironic enough, Gerard was actually a 'people person.' He would talk to any stranger if he had to, ask them how they were and give them a kind smile. But for some reason, when it came to family, Gerard acted like he'd never seen another human in his life.

"Do you know where mom is?" Gerard asked the younger boy too suddenly and crumpled the napkin into the pocket of his jeans.

"Market. She'll be back before I go to school." Mikey told him, staring down at his half empty plate.

Gerard said nothing else and excused himself from the kitchen table, leaving Mikey there by himself. He hated talking to Mikey, mostly because he didn't know how to respond or carry an actual conversation with him without stuttering or saying something completely irrelevant. Gerard couldn't help it. He was interested in things that his brother would never understand, matter of fact, Mikey wasn't allowed to be interested in the same things as Gerard. If their father caught Mikey even looking at a flower for longer than two seconds, he was yelled at and sent to his room.

Gerard brushed his thoughts aside and strode through the empty hallways of his home, listening only slightly to the sound of his beat up Vans squeak on the hardwood flooring as he went along. He was on a mission now, a mission to complete his routine which he maintained every morning. He was going straight to the frontporch to sit next to the potted flowers so he could watch the bees, then he'd watch the sun come up and keep watching until all the Sames started walking to school.

Gerard didn't miss going to school at all. He didn't miss being told what to do every second of everyday or being bullied for the dumbest things. He could recall in his second year when he was beat to the ground by a boy named Brendon just because he didn't like the way Gerard was looking at him. Of course Gerard didn't do anything back to Brendon because in all honesty, seven year old Gerard didn't know that getting the shit beat out of him was such a bad thing and he probably thought he was making friends from letting people punch the wind out of him.

Almost reaching the front door of his house, Gerard was unfortunately stopped dead in his tracks by the booming voice of his father catching his attention. Fantastic, Gerard thought.

"Gerard? Is that you moving around?" Donald Way asked almost timidly, still keeping upmost pride in his deep voice.

Gerard cringed and squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, hesitating to speak. "Yes, father."

Gerard heard his father shift behind him, "Where do you think you may be going?"

"Porch. Maybe garden." Gerard replied sheepishly. He was afraid that his father could practically smell the fear dripping in his voice.

A sigh was given from Don. There wasn't much he could do to keep his son from going outside, there was no stopping him. The kid was unhealthily addicted to being anywhere but inside the safety of his home. Don pondered for a moment, listening to Gerard's uneven breathing in front of him, "Just remember to stay within the fences. The Iero's complained again."

Gerard squinted his eyes and turned to face his father's stone like face, "Why have they been complaining?"

"Their son, perhaps. I'm only guessing he asked about you again. They're freakish people, son. I suggest not looking at them when they leave their house." Don replied, pursing his lips as he finished his sentence.

Gerard cocked his head a little. He didn't ask any further questions but gave his father a look as if he understood what he was talking about. He wasn't allowed to speak to the Iero's or even mention their name inside the walls of his home, so why would they care that much about what their son thought of him? It was a complete mystery in Gerard's complex mind. He'd seen the Iero's son a few times before when he'd leave his house in the morning. There wasn't much for Gerard to say about him other than the fact that he wore too much hair gel in his dark brown hair and his tie was always tied incorrectly. Or it was crooked.

"I'll be going outside now." Gerard mentioned quietly, not sure if he was really given permission yet. Turning his body slowly, he kept trudging to the door, not earning another word from his father.

He felt like he could breathe again when he stepped outside, taking in the early morning air of his living section. The birds chirped in unison above his head in the oak trees, their branches swaying in the chilling breeze. Closing the door behind him with a trembling hand, Gerard's bronze eyes flickered across the pink and orange sky that was forming right before him as the sun began to protrude from the horizon. There was nothing better to him than this, no matter how many mornings he saw this, it never became old to him.

He sat himself on one of the wooden porch steps and balanced his elbows on his knees so he could place his chin in his hands, only to give himself a better viewing advantage of the skyline. His heart felt as if it skipped ten beats, his breathing quickened and his veins filled with an adrenaline that was unexplainable. He couldn't describe why natural occurrences such as this made him feel a certain way, he absolutely adored everything beautiful that the world had to offer him.

Gerard's eyes remained glued to the sky until the sun was almost fully up and the space behind it became a purple to blue ombré. He sighed happily as the sunlight began to spread its rays across the wild flowers that were tucked in the lawn of his yard. He didn't even budge when his mother came home to fetch Mikey for school. Gerard said goodbye to his brother stiffly, half hugging him before he walked hand in hand with his mother down the block. Smiling to himself, Gerard got up and walked to the patch of flowers and sat himself beside them. He gazed at them, taking in the colors and the shape. His morning was already off to a good start, and he was perfectly content with where it was going.


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Frank wasn't having a good morning. He'd fallen down the stairs twice, burnt his toast, tripped over his sister's cat and even tore a hole in his favorite button up shirt. On top of that, he still couldn't figure out how to correctly fix his goddamned tie. It was a lost cause, no matter how many times he practiced he could not figure it out for the life of him. Eventually giving up, Frank let out a hefty sigh and shoved the salmon colored tie into the depths of his pockets, not to be seen again until he arrived at school. He grabbed his messenger bag off the end of his bed and tossed it over his shoulder, giving his bedroom one last scan of the eyes before sighing again and closing the door behind him.

He wasn't very happy with anything. That was his first major secret that would always be kept on the tip of his tongue. He wasn't happy with himself most of all, there were times where he felt suffocated in his own skin. He felt guilty about it too. He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, a golden diaper on his ass and a roof practically encrusted with diamonds over his head. But it was never enough to keep his happiness at a normal and ongoing rate. Frank was a smart boy- a genius you could even say, so that being said, there was no way he'd shame the glory on his name by telling people that he had quite a case of depression and crippling thoughts of self hatred. God forbid that perfect little Frank Iero have a single problem! It would've been counted as disgraceful by everyone around him. It could've even affected his Same Placement.

Forthwith, Frank tried his absolute best to sneak his way out of his house as quietly as possible to avoid any interaction with his family, he even made sure that the damned cat was nowhere to be seen in case of tripping hazards. He made it to the door luckily, managing to pass his mother in the kitchen without being spoken to or even scolded about not having a tie around his neck. He'd probably gotten the tie lecture about three times a week anyway. He glanced down at his wristwatch and cursed at the time, then proceeding to put open the wooden front door of his home. He stifled out a quiet, "Bye Mom!" Then slammed the door before an answer could be heard.

The sunlight stung the pupils of Frank's hazel eyes when he stepped, causing him to squint in discomfort. He fucking despised the sun and everything associated with it. He thought it was complete rubbish to even have a giant ball of gas in the damn sky, what was the point? It wasn't logical. It wasn't relevant. It was just stupid to him.

Another thing he despised was walking to school every morning. It wasn't because his legs got tired or because he was lazy, but because he hated getting his clothes wrinkled and he hated the constant looks from everyone he walked past. He was in the public eye of his living section, everyone knew him and his family by name. And God, did Frank fucking hate that. He'd rather crawl into a hole and die than be asked questions about his family's wealth by complete strangers. It was ridiculous. He didn't understand why everyone couldn't mind their own business. Or worry about themselves for a change.

He started his trek to school anyway, barely letting his thoughts overtake him.

Maybe saying Frank was genius is an overstatement. A huge one. Because if he really was a genius then maybe he would've remembered to tie his shoes before he left his house. And maybe, just maybe those untied shoelaces wouldn't have attracted the intent observations from Gerard Way who was only paying half attention to him from across the street, behind the fences of his front yard. Frank only glanced at Gerard, scoffing under his breath slightly as he started trudging himself across the narrow street of their living section.

Gerard didn't glance at Frank, more like just stared at him for little bits at a time as he walked directly in his direction. Gerard knew he was only walking to the sidewalk on their side of the road, but it still made his body flourish with anxiety. He tried not to care though and turned himself to ogle down at the wild marigolds next to his legs. They were orange, his favorite color for flowers to be. He liked them because they were a happy color, they gave a sense of hope and excitement and an underwhelming sprinkle of joy.

In that moment as Gerard began to pluck the flowers from the ground,humming to himself confidently, was when he felt someone staring at him. It was a stare so strong it could've practically burned holes through his pale flesh. He looked up slowly, never letting go of the orange flower that was still held between his slender fingers. That icy stare of course, belonged to nobody other than Frank Iero who was standing at the Way's white fencing. A puzzled and somewhat disgusted look was plastered across the sharp features of his face as Gerard made terribly awkward eye contact with him.

Gerard didn't know what else to do other than smile. What else was he to do? It was a kind gesture, he loved being kind. Frank raised his eyebrows.

"Do you need something?" Gerard remarked nonchalantly, not caring about the shocked look on Frank's face. Gerard didn't really know who he was besides his neighbor, and neighbors were supposed to be friendly with one another from what he had learned from outdated TV shows.

Frank's mouth hung open for a split second as he hesitated to speak, "It's really dumb to hum to yourself. It's actually really weird."

Gerard didn't answer and looked away from him, taking his marigold and placing the stem in his alabaster hair and letting it stay there. Frank shook his head and turned away. This kid has got to be joking, he thought to himself.

"Tie your shoe." Gerard said as Frank began to walk away.

Frank turned his head slightly to look at the pixie-like boy before him, "Excuse me-" He began to retort but sadly, his sentence was cut off when he took a step forward and completely tumbled over his own feet. He hit the sidewalk with a small thud, hissing in moderate pain as he felt his hands scrape against the sun baked concrete.

"Shoelaces are meant to be tied." Gerard called out playfully, chuckling a tiny bit.

"Shut up." Frank muttered.

Gerard frowned but nevertheless, spoke up again, "Would you like some help? I could get you a band-aid-"

"No!" Frank snapped, "Don't even talk to me, alright? It was a mistake for me to even say anything to you. God, I'm so stupid!"

"Alright." Gerard shrugged, "You're missing out though, we have Star Wars band-aids."
Frank froze. He was a sucker for Star Wars. But he couldn't. There was no way he could accept help or treatment from someone like Gerard Way.He was a damn Diff. And he'd barely spoken a sentence to him. If his family ever found out, they'd surely disown him on the spot. Yet, the palms of Frank's hands were still stinging like a bitch and he could've been pretty happy with a cool looking Obi-Wan band-aid to complete his outfit. Frank brought himself back up to his feet, fixing his bag on his shoulder and looking down at Gerard who had put more colorful flowers in his hair since the first one.

"I want an Obi-Wan band-aid." Frank demanded, offering no smile or hint of thankful emotion.
Gerard simpered and jumped to his feet, letting about twenty flowers fall from the creases of his shirt. "Okay!"

Frank watched as Gerard basically skipped up the path of his yard and through door of his house. He'd already come to the conclusion that this white haired boy was more than strange, a different kind of strange. He wasn't like any of the other Diffs that Frank had come across before. All the other ones were usually angry or disturbed in some way, sometimes they were even verbally and physically violent. So, seeing a Diff who wanted flowers in his hair and willingly gave out band-aids was kind of a rare sight.

His hands were just starting to bleed from their scrapes when Gerard returned with a little tin box of band-aids. They both remained on either side of the waist-high fence as Frank held his hands out, expecting the other boy to hand him the band-aids but instead, Gerard stared down at Frank's palm and bit his bottom lip.

"Well, make sure you put some ointment on them so the scrapes don't get infected. You might have gotten dirt in them." Gerard told him with nothing but tenderness in his voice. He then took two band-aids from the box, looking through the paper wrapping to see if Obi-Wan was on them. Frank was beyond stunned when Gerard carefully put both of the band-aids on either hand, making sure they covered the irritated scrapes.

"Okay. All done." Gerard beamed proudly.

Frank nodded, not looking at Gerard's face and down at the band-aids. They were pretty damn cool. "Um, thanks."

"You're welcome!" Gerard cheered in response, giggling like a teenage schoolgirl, "Also you should go, school bell rings in five minutes."

"Oh, crud." Frank hissed. He didn't look at Gerard again and bent down to tie his shoe. He thanked Gerard quietly and then rushed away, acting as if nothing had happened. Gerard on the other hand, continued to smile at himself as he lowered back down into the grass, tucking more and more flowers into the strands of his hair.

Notes

omg it has begun !! im actually so excited for this even though it's going to be slow as fuck but holy heck gerard is so sweet and cute and innocent in this i!! love!! it!! anywho feedback would be neato even though was kind of crummy?? but for the sake of star wars band-aids and the fact that its 2am where i am. take care kiddos xxx