Safe me from myself.

Gerard's POV

Everything was a blur until me, dad and Nate got to the hospital.

"I need to see him." I said and went to walk off but Nate caught hold of my wrist and pulled me back.
"Gee, the doctors have to do some serious shit on him before you can see him." Nate said carefully and I looked at him.
"I need to make sure he's going to be okay, he promised he wouldn't leave me. I need to see him." I said feeling myself begin to cry again.
"If Frank promised you he's not leaving you then he won't leave you." Nate said.
At that point I just lost it.

"How do you know! How do you know that he's going to make it! He wasn't even responding when the paramedics arrived! I can't lose him otherwise I'll end up back into his shithole and never come out of it!" I shouted well aware everyone was probably looking at me.
"Gee don't course a scene. You are just getting anxious." Nate said.
"I'm not fucking anxious! My boyfriend s lying in a hospital bed probably dying and I can't do nothing to protect him! I can't be there for him like he has been there for me! I could be losing him! I could be losing my meaning for life! He's my everything and without him I might as well be dead!" I shouted and broke down into ugly sobs.
I felt a pair of arm round me and I desperate for it to be Franks arms but when I looked they weren't the tattooed arms I was looking for.
"Calm down Gee. I know you want to be with Frank but right now he's in the best possible place." Nate said quietly
I just carried on crying into Nates chest.

Nate moved me to the visitors room where I calmed down a little but it wasn't much I still want to go and see Frank and be with him.
the door opened and me and Nate looked up and saw dad walking over to us.
"How is Frank?" I asked before he could sit down next to me.
"He's critical at the moment but the doctors are doing everything they can to make sure he gets better." Dad said and I looked down and felt more tears in my eyes.
"Gee I need you too tell how Frank was when the voices started up again." Dad said and I sighed.
"Tell voices was telling him that he had to hurt me. He said that if he didn't get away from me then the voices would make him hurt me." I said and I felt tears roll down my cheek and I wiped my nose in my sleeve.
"What was the voices telling him to do?" Dad asked.
"the voices was telling him that he had to get the biggest kitchen knife he can find and cut my throat open and watch me bleed." I sobbed.
"They're not going to lock him up are they?" I asked and looked at dad.
"He's a danger to you and himself Gee." Dad said and I shook my head.
"No he's not. He didn't hurt me. He was telling the voices that he wasn't going to hurt me. He wasn't going to hurt me dad. I trust him enough not to hurt me." I said but it came out in a sobbing mess.
I felt Nate pull me to his side.
"No more Simon please he can't take it." Nate said.
"I need to know so I can say whether or not he can stay with us or if he need to be in a ward." Dad said carefully.
"He's going no where." I said in Nate's chest.
I could sense that Nate was rolling his eyes.
"the voices was telling him to kill you Gee. I can't have him in my house if he is going to be a risk to everyone. Including you." Dad argued.
"I love him. I trust him." I said and moved away from Nate and looked at dad.
"You don't know what he has done in his past, because of the voices." Dad said.
"I fucking trust him. I don't care what he has done. I love and trust him not to hurt me. If you don't like it then send me back here where I can be with him." I said.
"Gee there's a chance where Frank could be sent to a mental hospital because he is a danger to himself and others." Dad said carefully.
"Your going to lock him away?" I asked quietly.
"It would be for his own safety and others." Dad said.
"Your not sending him away!" I shouted.
"Gerard can you see my bloody point for once." Dad said.
"No! You might of given up on him but I haven't! I'm not giving up on him like you did with mum." I said loudly.
dad just sighed and got up.
"at the end of the day it's my choice. If Frank is a risk then I have no choice but to send him away Gee. Just think about that." Dad said and walked out the room.
I stood up and shook my head and walked towards the door.
"Where you going Gee?" Nate asked.
"To have a cigarette." I said.
Nate just sighed and I walked out the room and went outside and had a cigarette.

Notes