Tonight we are young
So let’s set the world on fire,
We can burn brighter than the sun

Walking back to the parking lot, I jam my hands in my jacket pocket. I think about what I said, about having everyone find their own way home. I guess that was a dumb move. Amber drove us here I’m in no position to tell people to walk home. Amber and her fucking fancy BMW. I could walk home but after really considering this I decide that I’ll just wait.

I sit on top of Amber’s car arms crossed, pouting, watching them having the time of their lives.

I watch Amber wrap her arms around Mikey, beaming up at him like a proud parent. She takes his beanie and puts it on. Mikey lets her do it like it’s not a big deal. The two chase each other around the football field laughing; play fighting over Mikey’s beanie. She’s so cute…I kinda wish that was me. It’s not of course because with good croquet skills comes girls like Amber and I suck at croquet. I scoff, yet another thing Mikey can brag to me about; getting the girl.

Then again if she’s gonna be involved with my brother she needs to figure out what she’s doing with Frank. Watching them together makes me want to gag sometimes. Frank acts like the whole fucking world revolves around that girl and she just lets him. She lets him fawn all over her and encourages him with the kisses on the cheeks and the back and forth flirting. I think I’m upset about it because I’m the only one she doesn’t treat that way.

‘Behave Gerard Way’, that all she ever says to me. What the hell is that supposed to mean? Behave, ha, like that’s even possible. My entire life is one big fucking misbehave. I’m not changing. That’s probably why Amber likes the others more than me. Or maybe it’s because I’m just a drinking buddy and the others are “real” friends.

I watch as Frank joins in, letting Amber crawl onto his back, and then galloping around the football field Mikey and Ray at their heels. Amber leans down and presses her lips to Frank’s temple. He nearly drops her but Ray catches her. The whole thing just makes me sick to my stomach.

I get why the guys like her though. She’s different around all of us, more open and fun. She giggles and touches your arm and makes you feel like the most important piece of shit in the entire world. I don’t think she’d be good for Mikey. He’s fragile. If he likes her I’m going to have to tell him to be careful. I think Amber’s fantastic but so do other people in our friend group. No one needs to get hurt because of her.

I can tell I’m pouting, making up scenarios in my head of things that haven’t and maybe never will happen. I’m angry that I couldn’t figure out croquet and hurting from beating the shit out of myself with that damn mallet. I’m taking it out on Amber instead of just accepting the fact that this might not be my sport.

_____

I wait for what seems like hours for them to finish up goofing off on the field. It isn't even bright outside anymore by the time Mikey, Amber, and Frank stumble towards my car. In truth they all look a little high.

Mikey’s beanie is lopsided on Amber’s head. Frank’s got his arm wrapped around her waist. Amber’s hand is holding onto my little brother’s. Ray and Frank laughing up a storm at something Mikey had just said. They look like they’ve had a genuinely good time. Maybe they aren’t high on anything but life.

As Amber unlocks the car doors everyone piles inside. She smiles widely at me. “We can try again tomorrow, okay? Just you and me.”

I nod before sliding off the roof and getting into the backseat. It looks a lot smaller now that there are three people trying to squeeze in. This car was not meant to carry around this many people.

We drive back in almost silence. The only two people who talk are Amber and Frank, lost in their own little world. Mikey is smiling like an idiot. This is the happiest I’ve seen him in a long time. I should’ve been proud of him out of the field. Instead I ran off pouting. I gotta work on this whole being a good older brother thing.

Amber slows down as we get to our house, parking on the street. She rolls down the window, sticking her head out. Mikey walks around to talk to her.

“Can I please have my beanie back?” Mikey questions giving Amber puppy dog eyes.

She giggles, shaking her head; “I’ll give it to you tomorrow.”

Mikey sighs but nods, giving in too quickly. I wouldn’t have let her keep it. He smiles again, giving Amber an awkward hug through the window.

“Behave….” Amber starts but I cut her off.

“Yourself Gerard Way…I know, I know,” with that I throw my arms up in the air before walking up the driveway to the front door.

Notes

Author's Note: I hope you're enjoying the story. Remember to R&R, it makes me smile and update just a little faster.

Song: We Are Young by fun.