The Aftermath Of Death

Frank walked. He walked until his legs gave in and then walked some more until he came across somewhere he recognised. The little bar him and Lindsey had visited all those weeks ago. He looked up at its inviting lights and the dull smell of alcohol floated in the air surrounding him. The bright summers day seemed to turn dark and dull as he walked up to the bar and suddenly it started to rain. He ran quickly inside to take shelter and sat at a small table looking out onto the street.

It rained like never before. It's spluttered and exploded like pistol shots. It flooded the streets like the fountain in Washington Square Park and swept away all the misery like loose grains of sand on a murky beach. It rained powerfully and then lightly and for for a moment there was hope that the rain was about to pitter away into nothing and then it would begin to dance along the window aggressively once again. It rained a numbing rain. Which swirled and whipped around and caused chaos in the air as it washed away all the happiness in Frank hollow mind. Frank felt like a raindrop. So insignificant and unimportant in the grand scheme of the down pour. He floated along like everyone else, but inside he burned to hit the ground quicker, harder, now. But he kept on floating through the storm passing everyone on the way and making brief stops before finally coming to a climatic stop.

'Would you like anything to drink Lad?' The owners Irish accent ricochet against the walls of Frank's mind as he turned his pale face towards the man to smile up at him; a frail little smile. He recognised him from the first night at the little bar, but he didn't remember Frank. On his balding head sat a flat cap and a white shirt, yellowing from age, covered his bulging stomach and thick black braces holding up his striped trousers. 'Or something to eat, we do a mean pie and chip.' Frank smiled again trying to work out what exactly he was offering him. 'The best of the British 'ere'' Frank nodded and the turned back to the window.

'Coke, please.' Frank whispered loud enough so the older man could hear him. He didn't need to drink. He was just here because it was raining. All he needed has to take shelter; he didn't need to break his sobriety.

'Alrighty chap, if you need anything else then just call on me.' He shuffled away groaning slightly from the pains of old age. Frank stared on at the pouring rain which battered against the frosted glass window. The little pellets burst against the glass and exploded into smaller and smaller drops until they became nothing at all. The banging was repetitive like a heart beat or the ticking of a clock. The pub, compared to the coffee shop, was silently eerie. He was the only customer, but that must've been standard for a Wednesday morning, and so that meant that the old man working in the background and Frank's breathing were the only significant noises in the large place.

Slam. The cold glass of coke was placed under Frank's chin and the mans old spice cologne filled Franks nostrils, he grimaced distastefully, but smiled up at the man as muttered something about it being on the house. The dripping condensation dribbled down the sleek tumbler and pooled at the bottom of the glass as Frank studied the movement of the water intensely. He sipped the coke and watched the bubble, pop and fizz of the drink as the liquid sloshed about drunkenly and swayed like the ocean during a storm. Frank was drowning in that ocean and he'd forgotten how to swim

~~~~~

'Frankie!!!' Ray exclaimed down the phone excitedly. 'Long time no speak bro.' Frank smiled sheepishly as Ray rattled on. 'How's you?' He questioned.

'I'm good, FroFro, you?' He said as casually as he could as he sat in the middle of some street on some bench trying to avoid the inevitable.

'Eh, Frank I've known you what? 5 years? Maybe longer actually.' Ray began to count quickly and quietly before giving up. 'It doesn't matter, I've known you for a long time and I know when something's up.' Ray seemed to transform from Franks best friend do his mother very quickly.

'Ray, I'm just a bit down and it's nothing I can't handle.' Ray tutted and waited for Frank to tell him the truth. 'I...' Frank looked out onto the street. It was around 3 o'clock and people were rushing about, somewhere to be, lives to be lived and jobs to be done. While Frank say still watching them all rush by and he felt like a lost raindrop. Speaking of rain it had stopped and from that down pour came a rainbow which graced the skies of New York like a rare comet or star. Everyone looked up at one point and smiled at the colourful symbol of joy and children pointed excitedly at it and shouted and giggled at there parents told them about the leprechaun guarding his pot of gold. 'I'm just nervous, that's all.' Frank admitted.

'Why is that small one?' Ray muttered into the phone hoping that Frank would confide in him.

'It's today, the...appointment.' Frank whispered feeling ashamed and embarrassed. He watched a women walk past which headphones on singing to herself happily and she trotted in front of the bench Frank was perched on.

'I don't think that was they call it Frankie.' Ray said sympathetically. 'Do you want me to tag along?' Frank shook his head erratically and mumbled a no quickly and Ray understood immediately. 'How's Lindsey?' Frank aid confided in Ray about everything shortly after him and Lindsey's 'relationship' started.

'I don't know, I sort of walked out on her today.' Frank groaned slightly totally forgetting. He'd been so wrapped up in what was happening to him to even give on bit of attention to her. 'Oh god I'm a horrendous person.'

'No, she'll understand Frank today's a big day. She understands that you need to be alone.' Ray comforted him from afar.

'That's the thing Ray, I think being alone is making it worse.' Frank looked up to the fading rainbow and let a tear fall from his watery eye as he felt himself slipping into bad habits.

~~~~~

Frank was walking again. The pounding footsteps banging methodically on the ground as he moved with confidence up the street. His bouncing steps felt like the rain pelting off of the pavement as he finally gained the courage to go the place he'd been avoiding. His head swirled with worry that he'd kept from showing on his whitened face. He lost a lot of weight through everything from the Gerard business, to the alcohol and the recovery from it. None of his clothes fit anymore they all hung over him like rain soaked washing on a line. His hollow face aged him and he no longer looked like a young twenty something, but instead a ageing forty something. He had been glad Ray hadn't seen him since that party. He'd changed so much that he could hardly bare to look at himself in the mirror anymore and it took him to look at his body when he was getting dressed.

He felt pathetic as he stomped up to the building and stared up at his doom. It was for the best. It'll help you get better. Do it for Ray. Do it for Lindsey. Do it for yourself. He kept muttering to himself. Nothing was working though he was like a vampire who needed to be invited in. He tried to find it within himself to walk into the pale building which stood so tall and overlooking. Frank sniffled slightly rubbing his hollow eyes and defined cheekbones as he tried to push himself to go in. Nothing was working no matter how many self assuring things he told himself. He felt himself slipping into darker and darker thoughts and then down there in the pit of his mind he found light.

'Do it for Gerard.' He whispered to himself as he stepped over the threshold and stomped in not looking at anyone as he sat down in a rickety old plastic chair which faced the man with the clipboard. He was older and had stubble covering his old chin and glasses which graced the end of his pointed nose. The plastic of the old chair itched against his skin and the muffled breathing and talking of the people around him filled his mind like a puddle in the rain. His mind was swimming with words and phrases and crap that didn't matter. None of this mattered. Suddenly the man with the clipboard turned his head to Frank. Frank stood up and wobbled slightly as his legs had went to jelly.

'My name is Frank and I am an alcoholic.' Frank whispered slightly to the group of people who looked at him non judgmentally. He felt himself at that moment drowning in the raindrops he once trusted. He melted like rain in a storm. He new he couldn't fight it anymore.

'Hello Frank.'

He needed a drink.

Notes

HOW GOOD IS THE NEW TØP SONG??? Anyway, this is really short sozzzzzz. I just started my new summer job today it's really cool. Did you like my extended metaphor? Comment please and share around. Till next time...