Life is one hell of an unpredictable roller coaster ride that will leave you breathless and dizzy. The loops that makes the ride interesting are just minor things that gives us the thrill, the kicks. But however thrilling the ride was, there will be a time when you'll want to get off and be on safer ground. But what if you can't get off? What if the ride became a never ending torture, all its ups and downs promises horrors and different challenges each time? Will you jump and take a risk to survive, or just enjoy the ride with the other passenger on the other side?

I looked at the scattered boxes in my room. All of them reminded me of tons of memories spent in a place I called home before it became a place of torture. I know that I should be happy that me and my mom were gone from that place. Be happy that we're now away from where blood was shed and bodies were bruised black and blue.

I know I should unpack before Mom arrives but no, I don't have the energy to do it. Instead, I lied down on my bed and stared at the ceiling for a few minutes before pulling my iPod from my pocket. I plugged my headphones, stuck it in my ears and let the music lull me to sleep. Where will I be without music? I momentarily thought of it while letting every note and sound calm my mind. For once, I felt at ease since the move. I dream of random things that night. I am alone...

The next morning, I got up from my bed feeling tired than I was before. I know that the cause of my distress was this new place that I'm living in. All I know is this a good place to start once again. To hit the refresh button and load a much better page in our lives but I can't help feeling lost. I am now a newcomer, a new kid on a small town. If anything, I should feel excited but all I can think of was how would I blend in. Aside from being a shy person, I'm also the most emo kid you'll ever know. Seriously, I'm all eyeliners, black clothes and black things. Add the fact that I have these tattoos on the back of my neck. I mean seriously, my body ad looks basically screams of "notice me" but I am the opposite. I wanna be invincible. Maybe I will be forever the emo prince of irony.

I sighed as I went through my unpacked box of clothes and pulled out a pair of black jeans and a matching black shirt. I went downstairs barefoot and saw my mom preparing the table for breakfast.

"Frank Anthony Iero, I take it that you already unpacked your stuff?"

My mom said while putting a plate of pancakes at the table. I looked at her and smiled. Out of all the things that I'm feeling, one thing that surfaces more is pride. The day we left is the day my mom took a stand against all the beatings of the monster that used to be my father. It took long, but finally she decided that enough is enough. My mom took things into legal actions. It was a long process and we have to go away from our home just so my father couldn't reach us. It was the worst time of my life. Every day is a battle that I'm afraid we'll lose. But of course, proofs of domestic abuse is evident in our bodies and with neighbors testifying for us, we won. Dad was imprisoned. we were free..

I quickly grabbed a seat and took two pancakes and put syrup in it. Mom giggled.

"Frank, didn't you heard me?"

She said a little louder. I chuckled.

"I haven't mom. I'm too tired to do it. Besides, my room is so small, I don't think everything will fit in there."

I started eating. My mom makes the best pancakes, I swear.
"It's not small Frankie. It's the same size as your old room back in the house..." Her voice trailed at the mention of our house. I stared at her, took her hand across the table and kissed it. My mom, my beautiful and loving mom who had put up with my abusive father, is still beautiful despite the wrinkles and lines in her face. She smiled as I kiss her hand and reach to pat my head.

"I'll unpack later Mom, I promise. Please don't worry too much. And damn! These pancakes are good." I took a huge bite and she laughed. She proceeded to eat her breakfast while I stare at her, pass the scars and marks that my good-for-nothing father did to her.

I promised that like my mom, I'll be strong and try to move forward. After all, what can I do? Life still needs to go on.

Later that afternoon, while mom is still busy with settling things around the house, I decided to unpack my things and decorate my room. The apartment we moved into is pretty average but surely is unique. The rows of apartment is built like a rectangle of mini houses with a huge space in the center. At the center is a basketball court and a covered shed complete with benches where I observed, the tenants socialize. It was a good place I thought and smiled at the fact that my mom had found a new good home for us.

But even then, I never went outside because really, I just want to enjoy myself alone in this new place. I don't need anyone's stares either. I don't have the courage to deal with that yet.
All afternoon, I kept trying to make my room as comfortable as possible. Moving my bed beside the window, pushing my small bookshelf at the wall opposite my bed. Stuffing my clothes on a small closet and sticking my band posters at the far wall in front of my bed. It was early evening when I finished and boy was I exhausted. As I was arranging the random pile of things on the small desk beside my bed, I heard my mom called from downstairs.

"Frankie, dinner's ready!"

"Coming mom!"
I shouted back. I quickly finish my task and raced downstairs.

When I was sat at the small table, the smell of a wonderful dinner of steak and mashed potatoes made my mouth water. Mom set a pitcher of my favorite pineapple juice and and sat down at the opposite side of the table.

"Frank, don't you want to go outside later? It's a nice night and I saw some teens around your age at the court this morning. Maybe you can befriend them, you know, so you don't have to be bored when you're alone here." Mom has a worried smile on her face as she talks. I knew she's nervous about me not really liking this place. To be honest, we have the same worries.

"Mom, I really don't need, ugh, friends. I mean, I won't be bored here because I'm planning to spend my summer with my books. I really got a ton of new ones and I want to read them all."

I said before taking a bite out of my dinner. I stopped and savored my food.

"Gosh Mom, this is really good. What are we celebrating anyway?", I asked in between mouthfuls of the mashed potatoes.

"I just thought we could celebrate our new life in here," she smiled.

"And really sweetheart, if you don't really want to socialize yet, it's okay. Just know that this place is filled with wonderful people okay? And oh, there's this really nice bookstore just a few blocks away from here. They serve coffee in there too. "

This made me smile because I know my mom literally asked everyone about a nearby bookstore. She knows how much I love books and this is her way of telling me that at least, one thing I love is really close from here.

"Sure mom, I'll check that out tomorrow." I said beaming at her.

"Good! You can go there while I'm not around tomorrow.

Work starts early so you'll be left alone here. I'll make you breakfast before I go and the day is yours. Just don't forget to lock the doors and windows when you're going out, okay?"

Mom said, a sweet smile on her face. I smiled too before nodding and finishing my dinner.

Later that night, I opened my battered copy of The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. Aside from music, books have been my greatest escape. I love being lost in every story, love how I find myself in another world whenever I pick up and read a book.
This book comforts me all the time because maybe, I relate to it so much. The hardships of Katniss and Prim reminds me of the same tragedy that happened in my life. I read the book until my eyes grew tired and went to sleep, still clutching the book and my mind drowning in a memory of another world.

Notes

How was it? Please comment anything! It's my first time writing and I hope someone will like it. I'll try and update as frequently I can cause really, I have all the time in the world to write. Lol. Hope whoever reading this is having a good day!


--xoJenn