I should have never been driving

My mind felt uneasy. My body was numb. I managed to drink a bottle and a half of whatever it was Ray brought with him to the skate park. I wondered off, away from the others. I couldn't bare to face Mikey. He is a constant reminder of what I did, or what I didn't do. I should have pulled her out of the car first. He was yelling at me to get her out but all I could think about was keeping my kid brother safe. My father drilled it into me at a young age, "look after your brother Gerard. He cant look after himself. keep him safe, you hear me?"
I was on the side of the road somewhere, I could hear Frank's voice coming from behind... or in front or from somewhere but at this point I didn't care. I didn't even want to see him and he has done nothing but help me. I could feel my eyes filling up like a swimming pool of tears. "I should have never been driving" I mumbled in my drunken haze. Its all my fault.
I staggered onto an embankment, and fell to the floor for what seemed like hours. I started to cry out for Mikey, but he never came. I needed to tell him I was sorry, I needed to tell him it was my fault. Everything went black. I felt hands on my face and I opened my eyes to see Frank looking worried. "Gerard? whats going on? are you okay?" he said in a worried tone, I wonder if he knew what I did he would still help me. I wouldn't help me. I wouldn't help a murderer. Everything went dark again.
time lapse (the next morning)
I woke up in a bed, it wasn't my bed. What did I do? Did I go home with a stranger? I heard a door creak open and turned over swiftly. Crying out in pain. "I forgot about that..." I mumbled into the pillow, feeling the instant burn of my abdomen. I looked up to see who was at the door. It was Frank, he had helped me yet again and I haven't done any thing in the last twenty four hours but get myself into trouble and become a damsel in distress.
I only met this guy yesterday morning and we have managed to kiss twice, he helped me after I got the shit kicked out of me and now I've woke up in his bed. "We didn't... did we?" My stomach was churning. "no. We didn't. You blacked out and I carried you here and slept on the floor. I don't think your parents would have been best pleased if I carried you back to your house passed out drunk covered in bruises, now would they?.." Frank said looking a bit embarrassed, "you talk in your sleep, you know" He said giggling a little putting clean clothes, a towel and a tooth brush down on the end of the bed. "These are for you"
" I know, Mikey told me." I said, fully aware of my sleep state. Frank sat down slowly on the bed as if not to move the bed. "Gerard? who is Kayla?" Frank said looking at me with his worry in his hazel eyes. How did he know about Kayla? did Mikey tell him? "what?" I said, breathing heavily. "Its just you were saying her name in your sleep, is she your girlfriend?" My heart sank "n..no, she's not my girlfriend... I thought we established the whole sexuality thing." I said trying to divert the conversation away from the entire topic.
"I've had girlfriends Gerard, gay guys can still have girlfriends. They may not be into it but its a diversion tactic. its irrelevant" Frank said sighing as lifted the covers. "Do you mind?... Its just cold out here, mom doesn't like to use the central heating. too expensive" Frank said gesturing to get underneath them with me. "uh... yeah. Of course. It is your bed after all." I mumbled putting my face back into the pillow.
We must have fallen asleep because when I woke up it was dark outside. Frank was on his side, facing away from me. So I got up, took the clothes, towel and tooth brush from the end of the bed and wandered out into the hallway of the what seemed like an empty house. After opening two doors I finally managed to find the bathroom.
I let the hot water fun for a little before taking my clothes off, Frank's house was freezing and the tiles on the walls and floor didn't help with the heat problem either. After a few minutes I slowly began to undress and threw my dirty clothes to one side. After drying off and inspecting my injuries in the mirror I began putting on the clothes Frank had lent me. I was a bit warmer but I felt really hot as soon as I slipped the t-shirt over my head. I haven't felt right since yesterday. My entire body aches and the bruises on my neck trail from my ear all the way down to my collar bone. I looked rough. I've lost the 'me' Mikey was talking about yesterday morning.
"Gerard? you still here?" I heard Frank say, yawning in the hall. "I'm here" I said picking up my clothes and putting my head around bathroom door. Frank was standing in the door way of his room with pajama trousers on, leaving the rest of him exposed, he has more tattoos than I thought. I closed the bathroom door behind me and walked towards him ruffling my hair ever so slightly. When I was just a few meters away I looked down at his chest, trailing my finger over the flame that said 'Hope' underneath it. "Your hands are really warm Gee" Frank mumbled looking down to see what I was doing. He called me Gee. Only my brother has ever called me Gee. It felt nice.
Pulling my carton of cigarettes from my jeans that I had bundled up in my arms I put one to my lips, putting the carton away and going into Franks room and cracking open a window. I sat on the window sil looking around Frank's room while I lit my cigarette. He had a smashing pumpkins poster near his door and almost everything was black. I guess we have similar tastes. "Where's Mikey and Ray?" I finally said after a short pause. "After I found you, I called Ray who was with Mikey to tell him that I had found you and that I was bringing you back to my place for the night and not to worry, so Mikey stayed at Ray's last night." Frank said pulling open his wardrobe and picking out a shirt. He finally decided on a black and white long sleeved raglan. "oh" I said taking a long drag of my cigarette.

Notes

Hello my lovely's
I've kinda made Gerard sound like Dean Winchester at the beginning of this one, you know with the whole protect your brother thing... It was unintentional until I read through it again.Happy accident I guess.
leave a comment telling what you think if you would like, it would be much appreciated :)
Ya'll keep being ya'll :)