When Will Anyone Notice?

We just got finished doing an interview for Fuse and it went really well. We’ve done a lot of interviews with the interviewer before and he’s a really cool guy. His name is Steven. The only thing that I was uncomfortable about was the Gerard would watch me very intently if I answered Steven’s questions or looked at him while he was talking. In fact, now that I think about it, Gerard has been doing that a lot. Even if i’m talking to Mikey, Ray or Bob, he’ll watch me with an angry or jealous look. I can’t really tell which one it is.
If Gerard is jealous though, why doesn’t he just tell everyone we are together so he doesn’t have to worry about guys hitting on me or whatever he’s worried about. He should at trust me not to flirt with anyone because he knows how long I’ve wanted to be with him and I tell him how happy I am with him literally ten times a day.
Steven then comes over to me and we start talking about nothing in particular. Just talking about the band and how life is going. Suddenly, Gerard comes over and grabs a tight hold of my waist. “Well it was really fun hanging out with you, Steven, but Frankie and I better get going now. Bye!” Gerard says in an overly cheery voice, dragging me out of the room by my waist. I yell out a bye and a sorry to Steven, only causing Gerard’s hold on me to get tighter. I whimper in pain because his nails are literally digging into the sides of me.
This is the first time he’s ever acted like this with me. Is it just that he’s in a bad mood? I really hope so. It’s not like I did anything to cause him to be mad with me.
Once he drags us onto the bus, I whimper again louder and try to pry his animal like grip off of me. When he finally let’s go, I lift up my shirt to see if there are any marks. There is. His grip was literally so tight that his nails dug into my skin, causing me to bleed and there is forming black and blue bruises around it.
“Are you kidding me, Gerard? Is this some kind of kink you have because I didn’t agree to this.” I say, pissed off.
“No, Frank. I was just trying to protect you. He could’ve tried to hit on you or hurt you. I was being a good boyfriend.” He says in a confident voice.
“You’re joking right? We’ve known Steven since the band became a big thing. You practically just fucking abused me.” I say exasperatedly.
“Aw come on, Baby. You’re over reacting. I just want to make sure my beautiful boyfriend stays safe and happy,” he leans his head in and kisses my lips. Of course, I fucking melt into his touch like always. “Come on, let's go clean up the bruises.” He takes my hand and leads me into the small bathroom.
He always seems to do this. I’ll get upset at something he says or does and all he has to do is simply kiss me and I’ll completely forget what i’m mad at him about. I need to stop having such a weak spot for him. But let's face it, everyone of you reading this has a weak spot for Gerard fucking Way.
Gerard takes out the first aid kit, also grabbing a tissue. He dampens the tissue then begins to gently rub off the blood on my waist. There's not even a lot of blood, just a few spots so I guess he didn’t really hurt me, right? I mean, it sure did hurt when he was dragging me but it was only temporary. The only person that will be seeing my waist is Gee so I have nothing to worry about. It’s normal for your boyfriend or girlfriend to get over protective to that extent...I think. It just shows that they love you.
Once the spots of blood are gone, he puts small bandaids over the nail marks so they don’t bleed more. There’s nothing he can really do for the bruising so he just gives gentle kisses to where the black and blues are, then stands back up, putting away the kit.
He grabs my hand once again, leading me to the bunk beds. We sit down on the bottom one that we both share, holding hands and looking at each other. “Frankie,” Gerard begins in a stern voice. “I don’t want you hanging around other boys that I don’t know or aren’t close with unless i’m with you. Obviously talking to my brother and the guys is fine, but don’t say anything too personal about you or me. If you have a problem or something you need to vent about, you will come to only me about it. Understand?”
I nod, afraid of what would happen if I don’t agree. I’m so confused right now. If I can’t talk to boys that he doesn’t know, how am I supposed to do meet and greets? Does he not trust the guys? Is this a form of some fucked up type of abuse? Even if it is, I know his soft side and i’m willing to go through some obstacles to be able to stay with Gerard. Even if it’s as petty as not being able to talk to other men.
“Do you not trust me?” I ask slowly, with weakness in my voice.
His expression goes from stern and upset, to soft and caring. He pulls me up in his arms, laying us down and cuddling us. “I trust you with all my heart, sugar. It’s the other people I don’t trust. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I found out I didn’t protect you like I should.” He explains, running his fingertips through my hair.
I hum in contentedness. We stay like that for at least fifteen minutes, giving kisses here and there and sharing “I love you’s”. I wonder why his mood changes so quickly sometimes. I still have a few questions that i’m dying to know, but I don’t want to ruin this moment. He is in a better mood now though, right? What’s one more question going to do?
“What if I feel safe around the other boys? Can I talk to them then?” I ask.
He sighs and rolls his eyes, quickly getting mad again. “Listen Bitch, just fucking listen to me. You’re mine. Got that? You probably just feel safe around other boys because you’re such a fucking slut. I bet you would let anyone fuck you.”
I look at him, shocked by what he just said to me. He’s never said anything like that to anybody before. Not even when he was drinking. I feel tears sting in my eyes and I quickly get up, stomping into the main room. He tried to grab my arm but I yanked it away.
I sit on the couch, dumbfounded. Maybe he is just having a bad day. It happens to everyone. I probably deserved to be talked to like that, I was being annoying. It seems like he knows how to keep me safe and no one has ever cared about about my safety more than him so I can see how it would make him upset that I kept fighting and arguing about it. But was the fighting and arguing? It was simply me being curious to the rules he was making. I could’ve said things in the wrong way though.
I sit on the couch for a little while, just thinking to myself about Gerard and how I should treat and act better so he doesn’t have to get upset like that with me. His intentions are good, I know that much.
I decide to go back to the bunk, walking slowly up to him and seeing that he is distracted by a new comic he got from a fan. I gently sit on the bed, crawling on top of him and peaking my head above the book. He looks at me, putting the book down and then puts his arms around me so I don’t leave again. “Geebear, I gotta tell you something.” I ask in a childish voice, hoping he won’t be so mad at me.
“Go ahead.” He answers.
“I’m sorry for making you get upset with me. I didn’t mean it and I’ll try not to do it again.” I bury my face in the crook of his neck.
“It’s okay, honey. As long as you try not to make me like that then it’s fine.” He squeezes me a little.
Shouldn’t he say sorry to me too? He fucking called me a slut. I guess I just have to let it go. Maybe he’ll say sorry later or something. All I know is that I don’t want to make him mad again. He might say or do something worse.
All I have to do is keep Gerard happy, how hard can that be?

Notes

Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait and the shorter chapter. Maybe I'll just write another chapter for this again and then my other story. But anyways, oooohhh what's going on with Gerard??? Is Frankie being too vulnerable with him????


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