Thantophobia

"Are you sure you have nothing to ask me?" Gerard asked with a sigh as he lay his head down in Frank's lap. The boys were sitting in the grave yard from thir first date under the same tree as before.

"I....I guess..." Frank stuttered and he pushed his fingers through his boyfriend's ebony hair, "Lindsey told me to leave the subject alone and-"

"Wait," Gerard intterrupted. He took a deep breathe and sat up from Frank's lap, looking into his green eyes, "Is this about my gender confusion or the..um...other...thing?"

Frank's heart hurt when he saw how his boyfriend's face change when he sighed out the last part of his sentence, "I'm sorry, Gee." He said softly and reached forward to brush Gee's hair away from his honey colored eyes.

"No, which one are you talking about?" Gee asked once again and scooted away from Frank a litte, "I'll tell you whatever you want..."

"Both." Frank replied, ripping at the grass underneath him.

"Okay." Gee answered softly. "Um, so the gender thing. Ever since I was little I always felt different. I liked being a boy, but I still felt...weird. I still liked the idea of being a girl and wearing dresses and wearing makeup and all that shit...but I just kept the whole thought to myself because I thought no one would understand."

Gerard continued, "When I was about ten or something, I can remember putting one of my moms skirts on and looking at myself in the mirror and it just felt so...right. But I still didn't understand. Between that and being gay, I had no idea what was going on."

Frank stared at his boyfriend lovingly, inching his hand closer so he could link their fingers together.

"Then Lindsey came along, and she was the best person ever. So I told her everything, the way I felt, how I thought. And all she responded with was, 'Gee, I think you're gnederfluid or something. I was scared." Gee let his head fall onto Frank's shoulder, "I didn't know how people would react and how society would accept it. Because, I mean, who the hell is going to understand some one who feels like a man and a woman-"

"I understand." Frank said. "I understand more than you think."

Gerard lifted his head off of Frank's shoulders and looked up at him, "W-what?"

Frank let a short breathe out of his nose as he twisted his and Gerard's fingers together, "Sometimes I cross dress."

"I...I guess that makes us a good couple then." Gee whispered and looked up at Frank again who was giving him the most loving look anyone had ever given him.

At that moment, looking into Gerard's golden orbs, Frank wanted to say those three words so bad. But he'd only been dating Gerard for about a few weeks, and they hadn't even fucked yet. Frank shook his head, sex was just a physical act...it didn't mean love unless it was done a certain way.
"Gee."

"Frank."

"I like you."

"I like you too." Gee replied. He knew how Frank was feeling, he knew exactly what he was thinking too. He knew Frank wanted sex, he new Frank wanted to say he loved him, he knew everything. "You...you know you can say if you want."

Frank raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"I know what you're thinking."

"I don't wanna throw that word out there like it means nothing..."

"Then don't."

"But I wanna say it."

Gee rolled his eyes, "Then say it."

Frank dropped Gee's hand, gaining a confused look from the him. "C'mere." Frank said and patted his thighs, gesturing for Gerard to sit. Gerard smiled to himself and slowly moved over on to straddle Frank's lap.

They both looked at each other, Frank's lips curving into a grin, "Hi."

"Hi." Gerard said back.

Frank pressed his lips against Gee's ear, "Maybe 'hi' will be our always."

"Cheesy motherfucker." Gerard giggled.

They both went silent after that, just staring at each other with stupid smirks on their stupid faces. Finally, one of them made a move and connected their lips, moving them softly against each others as their hands trailed all over the others body. Frank's hands eventually slipped up Gee's shirt, almost pulling it off until Gee slapped his hand playfully.

When their lips finally separated, they lay in their backs in the grass with Gee's head rested on Frank's chest. "Are you gonna say it?" Gerard asked quietly as he stared up at the sun that was almost about to set.

Frank was silent for a moment. "I love you."

Gerard let out a relieved sigh. He didn't say it back, but Frank knew exactly what he meant.

Notes

HEY WAHTS UP HELLO
LOOK I UPDATED 4 U
UR WELCOME
IM NOMINATED 4 THE 2016 WATTYS WITH MY PHANFIC
IGHT BYE ILY
oh yeah this chapter is really emotional if you listen to Falling In Love Will Kill You by WRONGECHILDE and Gerard Way while you read it

AND OH OH YEAH THERE MIGHT BE SMUT NEXT CHAPTER OK BYE