It's all tøø real

I laid there clutching my chest. Maybe it was my own pathetiic attempt of trying to keep all the shattered pieces of my heart from completely falling apart.
I don't know.
Everything was really blurry at this point I could barely see past the tears that refused to stop. I kept hearing Mikey repeat the same phrase over and over as he held me but all I could make out of.it was,

"Hes not.."

"He..couple months ago..i know it's hard"

He kept repeating it over and over like he was trying to drill it into my thick ass skull. I attempted to focus on his words the best I could but it was no use all I could hear at this point was the slow steady beats of my own wrecked heart.

Then it was just silence.
I guess Mikey finally gave up on trying to make me understand. I dont blame him I would've given up at this point too. We sat there for hat felt like hours as he rocked me back and forth. Mikey didn't make another sound the entire time I'm sure he knew it would be useless anyway.

Our long and painful silence was broken by the sound of keys jangling and the door opening quickly. I didn't even turn to look knowing automatically who it was.
I felt Mikey lift his head off f mine to greet his beautiful fiance with a sad smile. Knowing her she probably just rolled her eyes. I soon heard the clacking of her heels as she walked off quickly. Mikey sighed heavily placing.his head back on mine.

Great I caused them to fight. I sighed softly at the thought closing my eyes slowly just letting myself wither in the darkness. I clutched harder onto my knees as memories.started flooding back into my head.

The day me and Gerard met.
I was in a small tattoo shop right outside of Jersey getting my scorpion tattoo. He would go in there and talk to his close friend Bob who just happened to be the guy doing my tattoo at the time. Gerard has always been terrified of needles and would never in his life get a tattoo but he was also so fascinated by it. I remember how he just stared in awe as Bob was filling in my scorpion. He looked so beautiful I couldn't help but stare at him. The second he caught my gaze he had turned a bright red and he smiled so softly. Just the thought of it brought a smile to my face. Right after Bob had finished my tattoo me and Gerard started talking instantly. It was so easy to talk to him there was no tension or fear usually I would let my anxiety get to me but it was different with Gerard. It was just. Love at first sight. We went to this really crappy coffee shop less than ten feet away from the tattoo shop, it was filled with hipsters writing their prize winning screenplays in front of everyone that walked in. It reaked of pure coffee like as soon as you walked in you were just surrounded by the smell but the coffee was beyond amazing. Gerard always knew the best coffee joints. And we just sat there for over two hours just talking about our hopes and dreams for the future. It was like we were in some terrible teenage love story, but honestly It was probably one of the best days of my life because I met the one and only Gerard way and my life had changed for the better ever since.

And then reality hit me like a motherfucking train.
Id probably ruined that.
i had probably ruined the only thing I kept living for.

But he had to forgive me right?

You only have one true love and I know or a Damn fact Gerard is the one I'm meant to be with. We've gone through so much together but we never let those things keep us apart. We knew we were meant to be and there's nothing that could ever stop.us from being together.

well atleast I hope so.

All I know is he's the only one for me.

Notes

This chapter sucked and.I apologize for.that I wrote it at 3 in the morning so please forgive me.