"No! No! No!" Gerard yelled. "You doing it all wrong. The hors d'oeuvres go by the kitchen door; the other appetizers go in the dining room."

Gerard had recently been engaged to Heather, a beautiful woman from Washington State, and he had spent weeks planning their engagement party. But so far, things weren't going as well as Gerard had hoped for.
"No! No! Don't touch that vase!" he yelled. "My parents' ashes are in there! And what the fuck are you doing with those? Those are my paintings you're fucking with."
Just then, Heather had returned home.
"Gerard," she called.
"Heather, sweety." he called back returning from the kitchen. He picked her up and spun her around singing.
"Gerard, stop. You're too much." Heather said to him.
"Nope. I'm just right." he told here.
"Really, Gee. You don't need to do all of this for me."
"But, I love you. I just want you too be happy."
"I am happy. You're all I could ever need."
She then kissed his cheek just as his cell phone went off.
"Hello." he answered. "Yes..........Ok...........What? What do ya mean you can't make it? You're the bartender...........And your telling me this now?......Whatever.......Bye."

"Who was that, honey?" she asked him.
"Appearently, our bartender has other plans for tonight. So I have no idea how we're going to have our party without one."
"Isn't your brother dating a bartender? That girl who works at the cocktail bar?"
"Your right."
He then dialed his brother.

Notes

Felt like a pop-punk song would sound nice, and All Time Low was the best