Dark Side of a Smile

Dear Gerard,
I love you, I can't go without a day without thinking ab out you. Don't ever think I don't. I'm sorry for everyithing, I didn't mean for this to happen, I wanted us to be together. When I found out I got pregnant, I couldn't think, or even breathe. I left that life, the state, almost the country. I didn't want our child that path of life. That life was the road to nowhere. I know, I lived it with you. I know you wouldn't want that life for our child. I didn't know where are life was headed, it wasn't a good life. Drugs, sex, lies. Who wants that life for their child? I know who's with her and I trust them with my life, I trust them with my child's life (which is more valueble). Gerard you can and never will see me again. I can't stand that pain of this anymore. The cheating, the crying, the yelling, me thinking it's all my fault. I'm not doing that life again. Never again. I'm sorry Gerard. I'm so sorry. Love Forever yet never, Frank. I look at the paper in front of me. Should I send this? He'll want me to keep writing to him. I can't let that happen. Fuck. They said it would get better but it's getting worse. How can I do this? I.... I'm not going to send it.

Notes

DON'T HATE ME