Crash and Burn, We're Young and Loaded
Chapter Four
Out of concern for my ribs, the boys refused to let me out of bed for a week. I think they were also worried about my mental wellbeing but I was stir-crazy and ready to kill something by the time they let me up. They probably wished they locked me up for the rest of my life, because the first thing I did was start giving them shit.
“So you’re telling me, you go on a three day raid and don’t bring back an ounce of food?” I had Jet cornered in the kitchen, pointing to the near empty cupboard. “I told you, we have two weeks left at the most! Do I need to remind you there are NINE of us living here? And Bandit is still a baby! How am I supposed to feed her?”
“I’m not a baby!” I whirled around to see Bandit walk into the kitchen with a (very cute) frown on her face followed by Poison and Kobra. I immediately pounced on them.
“Where’s the food Poison?”
“What food?” Poison looked at Jet in confusion, who was pinned against the wall with a very longsuffering expression on his face.
“THE SEVERAL WEEKS WORTH OF FOOD I SPECICALLY TOLD YOU BASTARDS TO BRING HOME, THAT’S WHAT.” Kobra ducked back out of the room as I advanced on Poison, jabbing him in the chest
“THREE DAYS! And not a bit of food! Weapons, oh weapons and ammo galore! I. Could. Kill. You!”
“Okay, calm down woman!” Poison grabbed my wrist. “We forgot about the food ‘til last minute. Then we came running back after we heard what happened. I’m sorry, but I’ll go out on a food raid today if you want.”
I pulled my arm out of his grip and glowered at him. “You better Party Poison. Or I’m cooking you.”
He just laughed and walked over to the open cupboard. “You seem to have forgotten all the cans of Power Pup in the garage,” he said with a grin at Bandit, who shuddered in horror. “Poison there is no way I’m eating dog food. It’s so gross!”
“No way am I letting my baby eat that crap.” I glared at Poison as he ruffled Bandit’s hair.
“I’m not a baby!”
After a quick discussion, we decided the quickest solution would be to hold up a store. We didn’t do this often because it could be very dangerous when there were Dracs nearby and we’d even gotten chased by Korse, BLI’s head Exterminator, one time but we were desperate and as Fun pointed out, this was the most fun.
“Are you sure you’ll be alright going Angel,” Jet asked me for about the twentieth time before we left. I growled at him and threw myself into the front of the Trans Am.
“Oh leave her alone Jet, she’s in such a bad mood she’ll blow the place up,” Fun called from the backseat.
“Shut up everyone, we’re going now,” Poison ordered as he got in. We were heading for a 7-11 store in Zone 5, not too populated and far away enough from home that we wouldn’t get followed back. We would also be changing cars. The Trans Am was too recognisable so for raids like this we used a nondescript blue Ford van we kept hidden in a cave near the Zone 5/6 border.
“Okay everyone ready?” Poison pulled up outside the door of the store and looked over the seat at the four of us crouched in the back. “Angel, you, me and Fun are gonna go in the front. Jet, Kobra, go round the back, disable their power and come in the back. Let’s go.”
I let off a shot into the ceiling as we walked in the door. “Good afternoon everybody, this is a robbery. Now if nobody loses their head, then nobody loses their head. Simon says everybody on the floor, right away!” I looked around with a smile. It was quiet, less than five people, and not a Drac in sight. “Let’s see who wins a prize for keeping their cool. Poison cover ‘em, we’re going shopping!”
Within five minutes Fun and I had loaded a cart with canned food and anything imperishable, along with batteries and a few treats for Bandit and ourselves. We also took several first aid kits, shampoo and detergent, hair dye, sanitary stuff, and anything else we needed. Kobra and Jet had come through the back by then and were covering everyone, along with giving me the occasional suggestion or request for something.
I wheeled the cart out quickly followed by the boys. “Now everybody just stay down on the floor until we leave, thank you for your cooperation and have a good day!” I heard Fun announce as he backed out after us. Stifling a giggle, I hauled the cart into the van with Jet and slammed the door as Poison stepped on the gas and we tore out of there.
“Empty that cart, we better dump it quick in case they’ve tagged it,” Poison told us as we sped down Route Guano.
“And Fun, Angel, do you guys have to quote “Thelma and Louise” every single time?
“So you’re telling me, you go on a three day raid and don’t bring back an ounce of food?” I had Jet cornered in the kitchen, pointing to the near empty cupboard. “I told you, we have two weeks left at the most! Do I need to remind you there are NINE of us living here? And Bandit is still a baby! How am I supposed to feed her?”
“I’m not a baby!” I whirled around to see Bandit walk into the kitchen with a (very cute) frown on her face followed by Poison and Kobra. I immediately pounced on them.
“Where’s the food Poison?”
“What food?” Poison looked at Jet in confusion, who was pinned against the wall with a very longsuffering expression on his face.
“THE SEVERAL WEEKS WORTH OF FOOD I SPECICALLY TOLD YOU BASTARDS TO BRING HOME, THAT’S WHAT.” Kobra ducked back out of the room as I advanced on Poison, jabbing him in the chest
“THREE DAYS! And not a bit of food! Weapons, oh weapons and ammo galore! I. Could. Kill. You!”
“Okay, calm down woman!” Poison grabbed my wrist. “We forgot about the food ‘til last minute. Then we came running back after we heard what happened. I’m sorry, but I’ll go out on a food raid today if you want.”
I pulled my arm out of his grip and glowered at him. “You better Party Poison. Or I’m cooking you.”
He just laughed and walked over to the open cupboard. “You seem to have forgotten all the cans of Power Pup in the garage,” he said with a grin at Bandit, who shuddered in horror. “Poison there is no way I’m eating dog food. It’s so gross!”
“No way am I letting my baby eat that crap.” I glared at Poison as he ruffled Bandit’s hair.
“I’m not a baby!”
After a quick discussion, we decided the quickest solution would be to hold up a store. We didn’t do this often because it could be very dangerous when there were Dracs nearby and we’d even gotten chased by Korse, BLI’s head Exterminator, one time but we were desperate and as Fun pointed out, this was the most fun.
“Are you sure you’ll be alright going Angel,” Jet asked me for about the twentieth time before we left. I growled at him and threw myself into the front of the Trans Am.
“Oh leave her alone Jet, she’s in such a bad mood she’ll blow the place up,” Fun called from the backseat.
“Shut up everyone, we’re going now,” Poison ordered as he got in. We were heading for a 7-11 store in Zone 5, not too populated and far away enough from home that we wouldn’t get followed back. We would also be changing cars. The Trans Am was too recognisable so for raids like this we used a nondescript blue Ford van we kept hidden in a cave near the Zone 5/6 border.
“Okay everyone ready?” Poison pulled up outside the door of the store and looked over the seat at the four of us crouched in the back. “Angel, you, me and Fun are gonna go in the front. Jet, Kobra, go round the back, disable their power and come in the back. Let’s go.”
I let off a shot into the ceiling as we walked in the door. “Good afternoon everybody, this is a robbery. Now if nobody loses their head, then nobody loses their head. Simon says everybody on the floor, right away!” I looked around with a smile. It was quiet, less than five people, and not a Drac in sight. “Let’s see who wins a prize for keeping their cool. Poison cover ‘em, we’re going shopping!”
Within five minutes Fun and I had loaded a cart with canned food and anything imperishable, along with batteries and a few treats for Bandit and ourselves. We also took several first aid kits, shampoo and detergent, hair dye, sanitary stuff, and anything else we needed. Kobra and Jet had come through the back by then and were covering everyone, along with giving me the occasional suggestion or request for something.
I wheeled the cart out quickly followed by the boys. “Now everybody just stay down on the floor until we leave, thank you for your cooperation and have a good day!” I heard Fun announce as he backed out after us. Stifling a giggle, I hauled the cart into the van with Jet and slammed the door as Poison stepped on the gas and we tore out of there.
“Empty that cart, we better dump it quick in case they’ve tagged it,” Poison told us as we sped down Route Guano.
“And Fun, Angel, do you guys have to quote “Thelma and Louise” every single time?
4/25/13