Love Is Insanity

"How do you honestly feel about Frank?" Mikey asked, his elbows spread out on the table. He was really looking for a proper answer, and a full-on conversation. Right now i just wanted to talk to Frank in the guest bedroom, or sit out and watch the stars with him in the forest field. My heart was thumping when the words left his mouth, and i could only answer with what i knew was true.
"I honestly have no idea Mikey, i can't believe that i myself don't know. I know i feel strongly about what has happened to him throughout us meeting each other, however, i can't tell whether it's just because i feel sorry for him or not."
"You should know if you love a man or not Gerard. Same as you should know your sexuality."
"That's the problem..."
"What?.."
"I can't figure my feelings." He sighed at me, and shook his head, unimpressed. I looked down myself, and a tear slipped onto the glass. "Im sure there will be an event though, soon, that will explain everything for me." He took my hand in the middle of the table near the vase of wilting roses that watched us. He smiled at me, and squeezed my hand before pulling back.
"I know it won't take long for you Gee, and im proud of you for considering it so well. I thought you would of rather run away than talk about this."
"I thought about it, but im here and i've told you." He chuckled and stood up, pushing his chair in and beginning to leave the room.
"You've told me, but when you find out, you'll have some explaining to do." He then left around the corner, and i wiped my tear stained face at the corners of my saggy eyes. I didn't want to tell Mikey when i had truly found out, and i wasn't going to until i felt ready either. I didn't wanted to dissapoint him, but i needed some alone time, keeping my emotions to myself. Even Frank wouldn't know when the time came, although if felt i would blurt it out soon enough.
Yawning, i put my shoes on, deciding i would have a evening stroll in my new neighbourhood whilst looking out for Frank. I wasn't too worried now, but thought i might as well whislt im out and about. The night air was cold as i walked from the sidewalk and across the road. My naked fingers were tucked into my pockets, and my black hood was draped right down to my nose from its radiating warmth. I began to step on the leaves of the forest, a chill of wind rushing over me as i shivered. I continued walking however, and starting hearing strange noises. They weren't animal like, or unnatural, they sounded like a person shouting. I questioned whether is hould walk further because of the consequence, judging to what usually happened if i went further. I still walked though, and found the noise to grow louder. I began to bcome concerned, thinking it could be Franks yells. Then i started to run towards the noise, with my feet slipping of the wet grass behind me.
"FRANK? FRANK!" I screamed, looking in every direction for a sign of him standing anywhere.
"FRA-" I began to say, but tripped up and landed harshly on the wet mud. I looked up at me realising i was in a ditch, and slumped my head downwards onto the sticky branch ridden ground. My head thumped, and my legs burned from the crash. I moaned, from the pain, and a shaking movement on my shoulder.
"Gerard? GERARD! Oh my gosh, i thought i was going to be here forever...are you okay?" My head shot straight up, and i came face to face with Frank.
"Frank!" I pulled him into a tight hug, not caring if he smelt, or how weak he was right now. I was afraid i was going to loose him, and im sure he was scared no one would ever find him. His arm rubbed up and down on my back, and we pulled eachother closer, our knees pushing up onto one another. Frank soon pulled back, and stared at me concerningly.
"Are your legs ok, i saw you fall down?"
"What about yours, i didn't see you fall.." He smiled and shook his head.
"I was daydreaming, and the fall was not bad at all. I just think you should be careful when you stand up." I followed his orders, and stood up carefully after he did. his arms held onto both of my sides as i toppled into his chest, my legs clicking in. I groaned from the pain of my legs, but they felt better now that they had clicked. I moved back from Frank, blushing because i realised his hands were still on my hips, and the heat was burning up my chest.
"Oh! Sorry.." He removed his hands, and my body ran stone cold.
"It's fine, i think we should head back before we go blind in the darkness."
"Damn right Mr.Way!" Frank laughed, and i heaved him up on my shoulders as he yanked himself out of the top fo the ditch.
"Grab my hand." I gripped onto his palm, and scraped my feet along the muddy walls, trying to heave myself up and into Franks arms. He caught me, and held me close as i breathed heavily into his shoulder. We both sat there breathing like running dogs. We pulled back and stared at eavhother for a bit. His entrancing hazel eyes, that poured daylight into my world, everytime he looked at me. I blushed, and remembered where we were.
"Um, i think we should get back."
"Ok, but don't rush, because of your leg and the darkness."
"Im old enough to know Frankie, i mean im the eldest here."
"Okay Mr.Clever!" He nudged me and i giggled. We continued walking, and i felt him shuddering next to me.
"You okay?" I asked, standing in front of him. His eyes glowed under the stars, and he smiled weakly.
"Not really.....i-im s-s-scared of the dark." I looked at his shaking hands, and gripped his shoulder.We stopped for a few seconds thinking fo what to say, as the shadows became darker around us.
"C-can i hold y-your hand Gee?" His voice was shaky.
"Sure you can." I took his hand in mine, and felt a buzz run through me, as our palms touched together. My cheeks were heating up, and i was so glad it was dark so he couldn't see. We carried on walking for a while, in complete silence. Every so often our shoulders would bump, and i could tell the shaking had stopped for him. I wondered if just because of me touching his hand could make everything ok. Was i that therapautic?
Our feet bounced along the grass, until we were walking on the stone ground near the road. That was when let go of my hand and began talking to me.
"I love the moonlight, it's so peaceful and reminds me of when i used to look out of my window every night as a child." Those words he said brought a little tear to my eye.
"Your here now Frank, and now the stars are shining even brighter for you." I felt him grin beside me, and he pushed up closer to my side as we walked. My spine shuddered again, not because of the dark, but because of him. And he was now talking to me again, in a complete daze.
"I think that you are-" His eyes were so glued to mine as he began to speak, i think he had forgotten that we were in the middle of a busy road. I looked behind him, as his words stopped, and mine began.
"FRANK MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!" I screamed at him, after moving out of the road, and looking at him. He looked like a little boy who had lost his parents. His mind was in another place, and right now i couldn't speak any more because of the speed of my breathing. I went to shuffle into the road, but before i knew a car had swept him away in his path, and he went crashing underneath it.
"FRANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!" My voice echoed in the now freezing atmosphere. I ran over on my jelly legs, picking him up in my arms. He was dead-still in my grip, and looked absoloutely ruined. Tears struck down my cheeks, and my hands shook violently round his limp body.
"O-o-o-okay -i-ts o-ok.." I whispered to myself, taking him over to the grass near the sidewalk, and leaning down across from him. I felt for a pulse, and luckily there still was one. A sigh of relief passed me, however, i was still in a wreck of being distraight. Who knows how many bones he could of broke. I reached into my pocket, and pulle dout my phone. I could of honestly admitted at that moment, my fingers had never of moved faster in my life. I dialed 111 and breathed heavily into the receptor, waiting for soemone to pick up.
"Hello, San Diego Medical Department. What service do you require."
"u-um..ambulance please."
"Thank you, please hold." I looked down at the tears on my face, and Frank's. Why on earth had he been crying in the middle of the road. I couldn't see his tears when he was standing there, but something shockign must of been running through his mind. All i could see now instead of a lively body, was a pale figure, with blood seeping down in every direction and muscle in his small figure.
"Hello, ambulance. What is your emergency?"
"M-my friend got hit by a car..u-um i-im not sure..e-everything happened so fast." It was true, and i honestly couldn't remember what made him get so caught up there, or whether it was just timing, and not me saving him.
"And where is your adress Sir?" The women spoke gently down the phone, attempting to calm me down, but just annoying me because of how relaxed she was in such a horrible situation. I did tell myself that whatever good i do, it should always lead ina consequence. This time however, i had gotten really unlucky for this to happen. What had happened that was so good it had lead to something this bad. Somehting good must of happened for Frank, not me. It must have been incredibly great too.
"Sir?" I realised i was still on the phone, and my breathing picked up again.
"U-uh sorry, 15 Downworth Street, San Diego."
"Thank you, we will arrive as soon as we can. Please stay with us." I dropped the phone on the ground and lent over Frank.
"Oh god Frank, im so sorry. i should of saved you. I thought all the pain and crap was over for us, but it just never ends." My arms circled his body gently, and my face pushed into the crook in his neck. He was stone cold, and i thought he was unconcious, until i heard him wince underneath me. I moved back and looked at him. His eyes were slightly open, like slits cut into his face. He was staring at me, with a small grin on his face. I smiled at him, and patted his hand whilst he breathed hevaily again.
"Thanks for making me realise." I heard him wheeze before closing his eyes again tight shut. My eyes widened, and my eyebrows moved up too, realising he had spoken. What on earth did that mean? How did this in any way make him realize.
"Sir, please step back. Is this the patient?" A man had made his way from the ambulance to Franks body. He stared straight up at me, as i watched others come up behind him with kits of all kinds.
"Y-yes. Yes it is." I murmered, stepping back and watching over the man at Frank's feet.
"Okay sir. Please return to your house, we will call you out soon, and get you to fill in a contract."
"But.."
"This is a serious situation, im sure you wouldn't want your friend in any worse pain." He smirked up at me, and began to work at Frank with breathing tubes. I began to turn away, and scowled down at the ground. Was i jealous that another guy was looking after Frank. In a situation like this, i couldn't believe i was being this ridiculous.
Was i realising my feelings after all?

Notes

*Grabs tissues* I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm definetely exited to see what Frank was thinking about. All will be revealed in the next chapter! <£