Love Should Always Be Blind

That next morning I woke up in a daze. I felt lips trailing higher and higher on my skin until they reached my own lips with a peck.

“Mmm.” I groaned, groggily opening my eyes, seeing the same black I did with my eyes closed.

“Good morning sunshine.” Frank teased. I groaned again in reply, re-closing my eyes and turning over onto my stomach.

“Gerard, it's time to get up. It's almost noon.” He said, poking my side.

“Stooop.” I demanded, feebly swatting his hand away.

“Well then get up...don't you want coffee?” He tried to bribe.

“M'too tired. Get it for me.”

“You wish.” Frank laughed, kissing my head. I sighed heavily through my nostrils.

“Fine!”I huffed, throwing back the covers and flipping over onto my back.

“There. That wasn't too hard now was it?” Frank smug voice filled my ears. The only response I could muster though was lifting my middle finger into the air.

“You're such a drama queen.” He giggled, unfazed, while taking a hold of my hands and heaving me off the bed and onto my feet.

“And you're too cheerful in the morning.” I mumbled.

“It's fucking noon!” Frank pointed out, his voice full of fucking rainbows and humor.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” I waved off, “Where are my sunglasses?”

“Why?” He wondered, genuinely curious.

“Because I want to put them on.” I said, like it was as obvious as the fact that I was blind.

“Why though.” He replied, his voice whining.

“Because. I'm not going out of my room without them.” I demanded with unmoving firmness.

“Fine. I'll get them. But I swear I'm going to make you wear them less and less until you feel comfortable without them.” Frank sighed, taking a few short steps to my nightstand to retrieve my sunglasses. “Here.” he muttered stubbornly, thrusting them into my grip. Gladly I put them on, with a smug smile.

“You're impossible.” Frank grumbled, yet gave me a quick kiss on the lips before we left my room and made our way downstairs into the kitchen.

“Finally. I thought you boys were going to sleep forever.” Mom's voice instantly met my ears, the second my feet made contact with the tiled kitchen floor.

“I would have if Frank had let me.” I muttered, while making a bee line to the coffee pot.

“Gerard, it's noon.” Mom scuffed.

“Everyone keeps telling me that, but I don't see the problem.” I sarcasticly bit, while hearing the beautiful sound of the hot liquid hitting the bottom of my mug.

“Dad? Why are you here?” Frank asked, making his way behind me. I stopped pouring where I felt was right. Frank put is hand on my back, grabbing a mug for himself.

“I stayed the night.” David's voice answered, close to where Mom's voice was. They must be sitting together at the dinning room table.

“Gross.” Frank mumbled under his breath, causing me to snigger, as I walked away from him to sit at the table as well. Once I sat at the table, I could smell Sarah's vanilla perfume from beside me and David's fabric softer, just like Frank's, adjacent to me. That meant Mom must have been at the end seat of the table, as I sat at the other end.

“Morning, Sarah.” I greeted, my voice having a echo from speaking against the lip of my mug.

“Morning, Gerard.” She answers, reaching forward and pushing hair behind my ear.

“I don't know how he does that.” Frank's voice came from behind me, then sat between me and his Dad.

“Do what?” I asked.

“Know who's in the room and stuff. Like Sarah hasn't said a word.” Frank mused.

“I have excellent smell. I'm like a dog.” I joked, tapping my nose with my forefinger.

“Oh, Gerard.” Mom chastised, but I just shrugged.

“Anyways. How was your night, Gee?” Sarah wondered, with a knowing hint in her tone.

“It was good.” I vaguely replied, trying not to blush. Frank's hand then snuck under the table to grab my hand, causing a small smile tug at the corners of my lip.

“Yeah, what did you boys do?” David pressed.

“Just the usual. We ordered pizza. Got coffee. Listened to music.” Frank shrugged, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles like usual. I froze for a second when he mentioned the coffee, wondering if Mom would pick up on it. She didn't say anything though, so I relaxed figuring she didn't.

“What about you guys?” Sarah redirected the conversation, for which I was grateful.

“It was good, we went out to dinner and a movie, then got a few drinks.” David replied, just as simple as Franks. I knew why our explanation was short. I didn't want to think about why theirs was too. Like Frank said earlier. Gross.

“Yeah. And since you three are all here together...We can tell Matt when he gets home...But David and I have something we'd like to tell you kids.” Mom announced, her tone taking on that professional mother tone. I tensed, but Frank's thumb never faltered against my hand.

“Okay. Well spit it out.” Sarah urged.

“Well, you guys all know David and I have been dating for almost five months now. And we're old enough to make adult decisions, so we've decided to have David and Frank move in with us.” Mom explained, kind of dropping the bomb.

“What?!” Frank and I both said in unison.

“Why? That's not long at all!” Frank shouted.

“Hey! Calm down.” David ordered.

“Are you guys getting married or what?” He continued, ignoring his father.

“No. Not at the moment. No.” David said. “But we're taking another step in our relationship now
that all of us are comfortable with each other. Frank you're here all the time anyways.”

“Plus, it's not happening right this second. You two are going to move in over Fall Break. That's in a few weeks. It give you time to pack.” Mom reasoned.

“Where am I going to stay?” Frank snapped, not making the situation any calmer. It was my turn to rub my fingers over his hand trying to calm him down, as his grip began to tighten. I just hoped it didn't turn into a fight...

“The guest room. We'll make it into a bedroom for you.” David said, “We've figured it all out.”

“Yeah without any of our say.” Frank retorted bitterly.

“You don't get a say!” David shouted. “You are the kids. You're not an adult yet. Once you graduate feel free to move out. We're not even having you move schools. You could have it a lot worse.”

“Fuck you.” Frank grumbled. Mom and Sarah gasped, while I only felt frozen. David and Frank must fight a lot and speak to each other that way, because from what I could tell, David didn't even flinch.

“You're so ungrateful!” David raised his voice although you could tell he was trying to remain calm. I couldn't take all the tension though and the yelling. I ripped my hand from Franks, and covered my ears with both hands. From then on, I began to count back from one hundred by seven's. I couldn't hear the yelling anymore. Only muffled words.

“Shut up, all of you. You're upsetting Gerard.” Sarah snapped at everyone, then I heard the legs of her chair scrap back as she stood up. Then I felt her soft hands on my shoulder.

“Gee. Please.” She tried, tugging my hands away from my ears. “C'mon. Lets go to my room.” I just whimpered pathetically. I hated feeling like this. I felt stupid and worthless.

“What's wrong?” Frank asked, his voice softening with concern.

“He doesn't like it when people fight. It upsets him.” Sarah snapped, helping me stand and leading us out of the room. Quickly we took the stairs and made our way to her room. Once I stepped inside, I immediately started crying. I don't even know why.

“Shh. Gee, it's okay.” Sarah tried to sooth.

“I f-feel so stupid.” Was all I could wail.

“You're not stupid! It's okay. Their all the stupid ones.”

“N-no! I am. I can't even handle a fight.” I blubbered, trying to scrub away the tears from behind my sunglasses. Sarah sat beside me on the bed and stroked my face.

“Gee. We all have things that upset us. It's not stupid. It's just what it is. It's not your fault. I'm terrified of the dark. If it got dark all of a sudden out of nowhere I'd probably cry too. With you it's people fighting. Baby. Don't cry.” Sarah murmured, wrapping her arms around me and rocking me.

“Frank probably thinks I'm pathetic now.” I shook.

“Well then Frank doesn't deserve you.” She simply said. Neither of us said anything else. Sarah just held me for a while until I stopped crying and was reduced to sniffling. That wasn't even a bad episode. That one was nothing. After a while there was a timid knock on her door.

“Who is it?” Sarah yelled, sounding annoyed.

“It's Frank.” Sarah stopped rocking me and I felt her head tilt down to look at me.

“Let him in.” I replied to her unspoken question.

“Come in.” She sighed. The door creaked open, but no one said anything.

“Gerard?” Frank finally whispered. “Are you okay?”

“No. He's not okay.” Sarah barked.

“Sarah.” I croaked, pulling out of her embrace to face Frank. I heard his footsteps move towards me, then his knees pop as he squatted in front of my face.

“Gee. I'm sorry. I didn't know you would get upset.” He tried.

“I know.” I sniffled.

“I'm sorry for getting so upset over something so dumb.” I muttered awkwardly.

“No. It's okay. Really.” Frank promised, taking one of my hands that lay in my lap. “You want to go back to your room?”

“Yeah. That sounds good.” I smiled. Frank stood up and backed away to give me room to stand up as well. I turned to face Sarah and bent down, plating a kiss on her cheek.

“I love you Sarah Bear.” I said.

“I love you too, Gee.” She smiled. I could always tell when people smiled by their tone of voice. Frank lead me back to my room, then, closing the door behind us.

“Well that was a bust.” Frank puffed out a sigh. I plopped myself in the center of my bed.

“Yeah.” I muttered. A weight in the bed then sunk, Franks body crawling towards me.

“I am sorry.” He insisted.

“I know.”

“Then what's wrong?” I sighed heavily, turning onto my side to face Frank.

“Why are you so upset to move in? I mean...I dunno. Do you not like us?” I asked slowly and uncertain.

“No!” Frank groaned, “I'm just annoyed, I guess. My Dad's always throwing me around. I hate being told what to do.”

“That's life.” I said feeling not much sympathy to be honest. “Even when you grow up people are always telling you what to do and you have to do it.”

“That's not true. You should be able to do what you want. People can mind their own business.” Frank grumbled.

“You sound like a kid.” I muttered under my breathe.

“Are you mad at me?” Frank asked, the thought dawning on him like a light bulb clicking on.

“No.” I said monotonously.

“Yes you are. Gerard, I said I was sorry. I didn't know. I won't fight if it makes you upset.”

“I'm not upset over that. I'm upset that you don't want to move in.” I groaned in frustration, flipping onto my other side, my back to him. I didn't want to get upset. I knew I was being stupid. I mean it's not like Frank and I were even official...at least I didn't think so. And it's not like if we were in a relationship I'd want to move in together or anything. We're too young anyways. It just hurt that he made it seem like it was such a torturous thing.

“Gerard.” Frank whined, crawling to my other side so he could see my face. “It's not like that. Of course it'll be cool. I'll get to see you more.” He tried to butter me up, nuzzling his face into my neck. I squirmed away, though, curling in on myself. Frank sighed but didn't give up, scooting closer.

“I was mad, because they-they can't just drop a bomb and act like everything's peachy. They need to warn me. It's unfair. My Dad always does that and expects me to be happy with it. It's annoying. I've grown up with it and I hate it...You know how you hate that your Mom never lets you out. I hate that my Dad throws me around.” Frank explained quickly, every now and then, pausing trying to find the right word. “It wasn't because I didn't want to necessarily move in. It was just me being upset with my Dad.” While Frank spoke, each of his words settling in and I felt myself relax and warm up a bit.

“Promise?” I whispered. Frank sighed that time in relief, nuzzling into my neck again, but that time I let him.

“I promise.” He pleaded, his words muffled by my skin.

“Okay...I'm sorry. I overreacted.” I admitted, wrapping my arms around his back.

“Don't be sorry. I get it.” Frank insisted, brushing his lips over my neck, causing me to shiver. At my reaction, I felt his lips smirk. Pressing harder with his lips, Frank kissed up my neck, jaw, and face until he reached my lips, planting them firmly onto my own. I pressed back, moving my lips in sync with him. I loved every second of it. Every time Franks lips touched mine, I never wanted it to end. But all too soon, I had to break away for air and rested our foreheads together instead.

“You're getting better at that already. Soon, I'll have to teach you how to french kiss next.” Frank teased, his mouth so close to mine, that I could feel his breath and lips move when he spoke. I felt my cheeks warm up profusely, but he just giggled.

“You're adorable.”

“Whatever.” I rolled my eyes. “How long is it going to take before I catch up with you anyways? Or are you just going to have to teach me everything.” I wondered, cocking an eyebrow.

“Are you asking me, what I think you're asking me?” Frank laughed.

“I dunno. What do you think I'm asking.” I challenged.

“Well, if you're asking me how far I've gone...well then I guess I am just going to have to teach you everything. That is if you want me to.”

“Of course I want you to... Eventually.” I said, tacking the last part on. I just got my first fucking kiss last night!

“Of course.” Frank agreed kissing my lips, a smile in his voice. “We'll go as slow as you feel comfortable.” he reassured, planting a chaste kiss on my mouth.

“Okay.” I hummed, burrowing my face into his neck.

The rest of the afternoon, Frank and I just hung around in my room, until it got late and he had to go home. He said he might as well start packing up considering he only had a week until Fall Break. To be honest I was nervous to have Frank move in with us, in just a few short weeks. We had only started seeing each other for what a mere three weeks and just started 'dating' last fucking night. Now he was going to live in the same house as me? See me when I woke up and when I got upset? The whole situation made my stomach turn upside down. At the same time though, I was excited, because now that he was gone I felt empty. Like I always do once he's gone. And if he moves in, that won't necessarily happen.
Feeling unbearably restless now that I was alone, I made my way into Sarah's room. Knocking softly twice, I heard a soft, “Who is it?” behind the bedroom door

“It's Gerard.” I answered.

“Come in, Gee.” She offered, and I gently creaked the door open. “ Frank gone?” She stated, once I made my way inside.

“Yeah.” I sighed, with a nod and sat down on her bed.

“C'mere.” I heard Sarah mutter, along with the sound of her pushing papers to the side as she must have been doing homework. That was usually an invitation for me to climb into her arms. Pushing myself up, I flung myself into her soft embrace, the sent of vanilla intoxicating my sense of smell. Without a word, Sarah brought her hands to my face and petted my hair. I nestled my face into her chest, feeling safe and whole again.

“What's wrong Gee?” She asked after a moment of us just cuddling. That's one thing I absolutely loved about my Sarah. She always could tell when I was upset and if I needed company for it or not. And right then I really needed someone. Not just anyone though. I needed Sarah.

“Nothing.” I mumbled, my voice muffled against her shirt. “Just thinkin', I guess.”

“'Bout what?”

“'Bout everything...”

“That narrows it down.” She teased gently, with a nudge. I smiled softly.

“I dunno. Frank and David moving in. Hows that going to be, ya know? And just Frank. School. How I'm going to be eighteen soon and I still can barely leave the house. How am I ever going to move out. I can't drive, I can't work, I-”

“Wow, wow, wow. Okay. Gerard, slow down. Don't get yourself all worked up for nothing honey.” Sarah soothed, “Just take it one bit at a time. First Frank and David. Yeah it's going to be weird. We'll adjust though. We always do, you know that. And plus if Mom's happy, then we should be too.-”

“I never said I wasn't happy for her!” I interjected.

“I know Gee. I'm just saying, it's something to think about to help with the whole shift. And you and Frank...well I don't know. How was last night anyway?”

“Amazing.” I sighed and blushed at the same time, burrowing my face deeper in Sarah's shirt to hide the red shade I knew was on my face. “I got my first kiss last night, Sarah.” I whispered, still in awe to the fact it even happened.

“Oh, Gee!” Sarah cooed, “I'm so happy for you!” I nodded shyly.

“I even took my sunglasses off for him.” I admitted.

“What?!” Sarah gasped, “You wont even do that for me!” She chastised playfully, with a soft punch to my arm.

“I know...it's different though.”

“You really like him, don't you?” Sarah noted, with a certain tone I didn't understand.

“I do. I really, really do.” I sighed.

“I guess I should be more nice to him then, huh?” She teased, making me giggle.

“Yeah, probably. You know he's even said you scare him.” I informed. That made Sarah bark out a loud laugh.

“Well good,” She continued to chuckle. “I'll put the fear of God into anyone that thinks they can mess around with my little brothers.”

“You're crazy, Sarah.” I chuckled as well.

“I know.” She shrugged, making me smile.

“I love you.” I murmured after a moment of silent breathing.

“I love you too, Gee.” She replied, pecking a kiss on the crown of my head. “See. Don't worry, okay? I'll take care of you. I promise. If you ever need help, just ask. Frank really likes you too. I can tell. Don't worry. Just take it slow with him if you're nervous. And if he doesn't want to, tough shit.” Sarah went on. See. I didn't even have to tell her I was nervous, she just knew.

“Yeah, I know.” I said.

“And school. Gee, you're a genius. Ray's a great teacher, you love him. If you're stressed about anything in lessons just ask.” Sarah went on. Honestly, it wasn't really that though. It was college I was worried about. Could I even go to college? Would Mom let me? I guess Sarah didn't know exactly everything, but in a way she lead me to the answer. I'll just have to ask Ray about that.

“And anything else you said, I don't want you worrying about that, Gerard. You hear me?” Sarah went on, her voice growing firmer and firmer. I nodded, to indicate I was in fact listening.

“You focus on the here and now. Don't let your mind wander any further.”

“I'll try.” I sighed, shifting my head on her chest.

“That's fair enough.” She agreed, going back to petting my hair. We sat there for a long time after that.

Sarah started to sing that Bob Marley song, 'Don't worry. Be happy. 'Cause everything is gonna be alright.' It was like the 'go to' song she sang to me and Matt whenever we were upset. First when Dad died and we were young; that's when she'd sing it to me and Matte. Then when I went blind and I got my fits. It was a song that always made me calm and happy. I was glad I always had Sarah to go to. She kept me sane. Matt and I both. I didn't know what I would do when she moved out and I was left here all alone. Matt would eventually have to move too...I tired to stop myself right there though. Like Sarah said. Focus on the here and now. Don't wander any farther than that.

Notes

Please let me know what ya think. I hope you like it as much as I enjoy writing it!