Don't assume

for the past week i had stayed home from school faking an illness which my parents bought because one, i’m rarely ever sick, and two, i do feel like shit on the inside.

It was thursday and i was just sitting on the couch watching tv when Mikey texted me at about noon.

-hey its lunch and me and frank wanna ditch cool if we come have a movie marathon? may take your mind off things

i sighed. Mikey had no idea that having frank near me would only make my mind worse but i didn’t want to deny him because then he’d worried as to why i said no.

-ya only if u pick me up some cigs
i texted back before tossing my phone to the side as i hid under the blanket i was using further.

within ten minutes both frank and Mikey were walking into the living room and sitting with me.

“how’re you feeling?” Mikey asked me.

“i’m fine mikes.”

“ya you okay/ you’ve been gone all week.” frank said then whispered when Mikey wasn’t looking “and you didn’t respond to any of my texts.”

“i turned my phone off so i wouldn’t be distracted and sleep. I’m sorry.” i told him giving him apologetic eyes.

In reality i was just scared shitless about telling frank and it was putting my nerves on edge.
“mikey did you get me some cigarettes?”

i asked hoping to try and take the edge off my mind. “shit! i forgot man I'm sorry. Let me go run and grab them now and i grab some junk food for us to snack on too since it looks like were all out.”

i was going to protest and say it was fine but frank cut me off before i could open my mouth. “sounds good ill stay here and keep gee company while we pick some movies.” mikey nodded and with that he was gone.

As soon as the front door shut frank moved next to me and placed his lips on mine. I kissed back but my stomach tightened as i did.
“missed this.” he whispered. “all fucking week missed this so much.”

i managed to remain clam until his hand trailed down to my waist. I grasped his hand and moved it away. “im sorry frankie not now.”

frank looked at me in disbelief. “its been a whole week and you don't want to? dont worry about getting me sick ill be fine.” he stated as he placed his hand onto my crotch.

i firmly grasped his wrist and forcefully moved it away. “frank its been a rough week and i don’t want to.”

“did i do something?” he asked nervously
“gee i haven’t seen you since the night of my party and i didn’t even get to kiss you on my birthday.”

i felt my eyes beginning to sting. “frank im sorry. im so sorry.”

“sorry for what?”

My first tough was to say killing our child but i couldn’t the thought made me sick and i burst into tears. i murdered our kid.

“Gerard?”

“just frankie i need to talk to you about something important but mikey may come home and i need some time to do it. Do you think you can ditch tomorrow without letting mikey know and come here?”

“can’t you tell me now?”

i shook my head “i don’t want mikey to walk in.”

“does this have something to do with ashley? did she find out about us? does mikey know? is he mad?”

“no frank no one knows just trust me okay?”

he bit his lip and stared at me “yeah i can ditch tomorrow.”

Notes

in history supposed to be taking notes but instead I'm writing frerard

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