*~*Gerard's POV*~*

Just over one week passed, and I was becoming a well liked person around the camp, to some at least. Others hated me, but I stayed away from them as much as I could.
Most of the day I spent going from practicing my aim with a gun and filling it with gunpowder, and was becoming faster at it with every try. I wasn't good with my aim, though, and some of the bigger guys mocked me, but I never let it get to me, keeping my head held high. I spent my evenings on guard duty until the moon was high up in the sky and someone came to relieve me. I was good at staying awake on duty, since that's when I would write letters to Lindsey and Bandit, hoping to mail them off along with all the other letters soldiers write, or I would have whoever was on the shift with me help me keep balance, and we'd laugh about it.
The only times I saw Ray was during meal time, since we had different shifts, and he had to spend half of his time in weapons and the other half learning about quick fixes to something that happens during a battle, all of which he knew and would complain to me about when no one believed him when he said he did.
I saw Jared, one of the only other people I consider a friend here, only a few times over the two weeks. He was usually called out for his behavior and publicly whipped, but never by General Christopher, he was never present for the punishments that involved a certain Jared Leto, come to think of it, I'd hardly seen him since arriving. Jared never let anything bring his spirits down, and I saw a smug look on his face all the time when he was in public eye. When Ray would treat the welts with a special cream during lunch, though, he would drop the facade and say how much it would hurt, and every time, the two of us would tell him to stop being an arrogant bastard, but within forty eight hours, he was back complaining.
Some people never learn.
One night as the three of us were sitting at the bench we sat on our first day, which we've indirectly claimed as our own, eating the same gruel as before, the topic of military strategy came up.
"I know nothing of strategy, but give me a job, I'll do it," I said around a mouthful of the watery potatoes. Over time, they grow on you, but they were still really nasty. "Although, I'm not excited on the idea of having to kill someone, I have nightmares about that. I'd rather do something else that wouldn't put me in that situation."
"You're more worried about killing someone else than dying yourself?" Jared asked, picking at his own biscuit. He held out his dish and I took a chunk of his meat, he didn't each much of it anyways, as I quickly learned, and was more than happy to offer it up.
"Well, no, but I have a conscious unlike most men. I'd live forever with the thought of killing someone, I think it'd eat me alive."
"That is why I'm a doctor, very unlikely chance I'll deal with that," Ray said with a smug look on his face. I hit his shoulder, but he did nothing but smile at me. "What about you Leto? Could you easily kill a man?" Ray asked, and we both turned to face him.
I knew the answer, just by looking at him I knew he would do it without a second thought, and even back when I got him and his brother out of going to prison for robbing a bank, I knew he was a killer. He had the air about him, and it made me glad I was defending him in a robbery and not in a murder trial.
"I think Mister Way could tell you the answer to that," he said as if he read my thoughts. "Before you ask, though, I don't do it just for the thrill, I do have reasons. For example, before I was here, I was actually in prison for killing a man, but, he was a bigger criminal than me. He fired his gun at the tavern one night and killed just about everyone there but got let off because he was rich."
"How'd you get out?" I asked, finishing off my potatoes and moving to the meat.
"Had someone bail me out, and by that-"
"-you mean you broke out and ran away to join the circus," I finished for him. "Is that how you were going to finish that sentence?"
Jared smirked, "it's like you read my mind."

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That night I was on guard duty with Jared and Pierre Bouvier, a guy who came apart of a group drafted before me. He's younger than me, but more experienced with weapons than I'll ever be. He's told me stories about going hunting with his dad, who taught him how to defend himself, and even about when he had to go in battle. He said that just a few short weeks after he arrived they went to battle, and his close friend Chuck had died right in his arms as I wrote a letter.

My dearest Lindsey and Bandit,

Things are going well here. I've only been in training since I arrived, and I'm really bad at firing a gun, as I've found out and have been told by numerous people. I've made a few friends, too. Do you remember me working a case for a certain Jared Leto? I think I asked that in a previous letter, but no harm in mentioning it again. Anyways, he's here with me, one of the first people I got to know. Actually, General Christopher shot him on the march here for tripping, poor soul.

I don't have much to say to you. I miss you both so much and hope you're both fine, or better. I'm still alive and kicking, and Ray even said he won't let me die if it's the last thing he does.

I hope to be home soon, write me back as soon as you can.

Gerard

I finished my letter as Pierre reached the end of his story, and I folded the paper, and tucked it into my pocket for later to set off for mailing.

"Chuck was a good man, he shouldn't have met his end so soon." Pierre seemed to get lost in another world for a moment, before he chuckled, a sound that usually meant something funny but sounded more saddened than anything. "What's sad is, we were in a fight then. I was mad at him for getting us both in trouble and we got publicly stripped down and flogged. I never got a chance to apologize to him for being an ass."

"I'm sure he knew, Pierre. From what you tell me, he seemed like a really good friend and probably didn't think you were actually mad at him," I said, trying to be comforting. I wasn't much of a therapist, but I knew how to calm people down pretty well.

Pierre chuckled again, "I'm sure he's watching us and calling me daft for acting like such a woman about my feelings, but I can't help it...What about you? Here I am spilling my heart out to you over something I can't control, you have experiences like that?"
I stiffened slightly, hopefully it went unnoticed, and thought my words carefully before speaking. "Maybe my brother, and the rest of my family, but they're not dead, or at least as far as I know. They kicked me out over seven, getting close to eight years I believe. It doesn't bother me, I'm better off without them, but if I had to think of one moment, I guess that'd be it...?" I ended with a question, not sure where I was going with the statement.

Pierre looked at me with a serious expression on his face that I could hardly see in the moonlight. "You need to straighten things out with them, you might not have a chance. Don't be a Pierre," he said and his usual smile returned to his face. I caught on to what he was saying and chuckled a bit, smiling.
“Yeah, you really need to fix things between you guys,” Jared piped in for the first time in the conversation, which was shocking. He wasn’t usually quiet.
"Tell you what, if I make it out of here alive, I'll go to their old farm and try to salvage what's remaining of our relationship."

"I'll hold you to your words, Gerard, and don't think I will." Jared said, and for a while we were both silent, turning separate ways to watch for intruders.
Not even a full minute after being silent did someone approach from my side, I patted Pierre's shoulder and stood up, grabbing my gun and pointing it at the man. There was a laugh and as he stepped closer to the fire we had for warmth, I saw it was General Christopher. We put our guns down but continued to stand.

"At least I know I have two men who are actually paying attention for once," he said, stopping a few feet away. "Report?"

"Nothing, sir," Pierre said before I could open my mouth.

"Fantastic...Well, I came to tell you that starting tomorrow we're taking everything down and moving, we've been here way too long, as you know Bouvier, and the Confederates are moving closer."

"Don't you want us to meet them? We surely have enough men to fight them off-"

"We have great numbers compared to the ones we've seen, but how many of them are trained to fight? Way here can barely hit anything on target from what I've seen," Christopher grinned at me and I tried not to shudder, "besides, why should we go looking for trouble?". I didn't like the way his green eyes seemed to analyze me, but I didn't say anything. He was one of the few people at the camp that I was scared of and refused to talk to, even in a group of people, I felt like he was signaling me out and it was strange.

"Okay sir," Pierre said, and his hand went up to his brow, and I did the same, both saluting, and Christopher left without another word.

He turned back after he walked a few steps, walking backwards. "Just because we're not fighting now doesn't mean we won't ever, practice your aim, Way, otherwise you'll be one of many unmarked graves." Then he left for sure, ducking inside what I've come to assume is where the senior officers reside.

I looked over at Pierre and neither of us said anything for a moment, both maybe a little shocked that General Christopher talked to us, or that he told us information before he told the group. That was the closest I'd ever spoken to him one on one, and I really didn't like it.

"Well you do need to work on your aim," Pierre said and I pretended to look offended and huffed, crossing my arms and turning my back to him and walking back to my post. He only laughed and took his place again, and we continued our shift with no problems.

I pulled out my letter again, and unfolded it. After my name I added 'I just got news that we're moving the camp, so you won't be able to reach me at this address. I'll write you from the new location once we arrive. Love you.'

Not long after I finished writing the last sentence, our replacements showed up, and we gave them the news General Christopher told us, which they didn't seem to care about much.

Pierre and I both made our way to the tent for us, going our separate ways once inside - he went over to where his little group of friends were sleeping. I saw him push the dark haired one, I believe it was David, over and they laid down, with David laying half on top of Pierre. I didn't question the two of them, Pierre had told me that he had an ex-girlfriend that he had a baby with, but nothing more, and I didn't ever ask to know about anything else.

I walked over to the little spot Ray, Jared, and I had together, and pulled one of the blankets off of him, taking it for myself. Jared grabbed his own blanket from somewhere, he liked to hide it from us so we wouldn’t steal it, and curled up next to me as I laid down. He stirred next to me but didn't say anything or show any signs that he was awake. I pulled the blanket up as far as I could without having my feet poke out and sighed, staring up at the top of the tent. I closed my eyes and willed myself to sleep.

In my subconscious mind, I dreamt of what I had agreed to with Pierre, that I would fix my relationship with my brother.

I forced myself to walk up to the house, leaving Bandit and Lindsey in the carriage, not sure if it was safe to bring them with me. I turned to look at them and Bandit looked a little scared and I smiled at her. I watched as I knocked on the door and Mikey opened the door, looking just how I remembered, with his glasses resting at the tip of his nose. I knew he'd be home, Mom would never kick out her favorite son.

"Who are you?" Mikey asked, and that was the biggest heart break I'd ever experienced, and as I tried to explain who I was, I saw Mom in the hallway behind him. She looked at me, our eyes met, and she ran forward, and pushed me back.

"Get out of here! Our lives are perfect, don't you ruin it!"

"But Mom, I'm here to fix things-"

"Do you have that whore and disgrace with you? Tell them to go jump off a cliff, and while you're at it, follow them!" she pushed me again and pulled Mikey inside with her.

I woke up, my heart beating a little too fast. I saw Ray's face over mine, looking worried.

"Are you okay Gerard?" he asked in a low whisper. I nodded without another word. I thought I'd get more scared about many other things than my family rejecting me a second, time but I guess I was wrong, that was pretty freaky. "Bad dream?"

"Just something that freaked me out a little," I whispered, and I looked around us. "What time is it?"

"Time to be getting ready. I heard that we're packing up and moving today from one of the other soldiers." I nodded and he looked at me, clearly confused.

"General Christopher told Pierre and I yesterday while we were on duty."

"Weird...get up faster, we need to get breakfast quickly otherwise we have to wait until we reach the new camp before we eat."

Ray stood up and held out a hand, which I grabbed and he pulled me up effortlessly. We crudely folded our blankets and left the tent, joining the end of the line for food.

We left shortly after breakfast, and I was given the assignment to help pack up the sleeping tents and all the contents that no one had grabbed. It took numerous hours and we didn't move until the sun was past noon. General Christopher was back on his horse, towering above us before he addressed the group as a whole.

"Gentlemen, we do not mean to cause harm during this journey, but if we are threatened, you better fight until we win, because failure is not an option where we are from, got that?"

"Yes sir," the whole group chimed in unison and Christopher smiled at everyone and turned his horse around, "we'll go until I stop."

"I wonder how long he'll make us go," Ray said as he made his way over to me. Jared was tagging along behind him, his head down and didn't greet me for once. Ray just shrugged when I gave him a questioning look, so I ignored it.

"I don't care, as long as nothing bad happens along the way."