Bright Lights Cast A Shadow

Gerard looked up at the doctor, his eyes swollen and red, tears staining his pale face. The doctor's expresssion was serious but it also looked kind of relieved.
'We have managed to stabilize your brother. But he will stay asleep for a while. We didn't have to put him in a coma. He will be fine eventually.'
Mikey was shocked. He had been so sure that he was going to die. He wanted to die, so badly. He was very disappointed in himself. He couldn't even manage to end his own life. That's so pathetic.
But most of all, he was sad. He wanted to just stop living, to not exist anymore, but he had failed. It was as though he was falling into a bottomless hole, that swallowed him inside its darkness.
He felt trapped. He was, in a way. Trapped inside his own head.
He was still hovering beside Gerard, who was now standing up slowly. The doctor had told him that he could visit Mikey. Gerard followed the doctor to a room and Mikey decided to float along.
They entered the room, Mikey letting out a gasp that went unnoticed. He had seen his own lifeless body in a bloody bathtub, sure, but that had been by his own doing, it had been intentional.
This was something entirely different, though. There were tubes and wires everywhere, going in and out of his body, it looked really revolting.
Mikey floated to the window, his back to his own body, looking at anything but himself in the hospital bed.
Gerard stood in the doorway for a bit longer, he had begun to cry again. Silently sobbing, he shuffled closer towards the bed. When he reached it, he took one of Mikey's hands in both of his own and stared down at his brother.
Mikey somehow knew that he wasn't going to wake up because he was still there in this ghost-like form. He could hear Gerard as he began speaking to his body, or more to himself, because he thought that Mikey was unconscious, which he kind of was.
He could still hear him, though.
'Why Mikey? Why did you do that? I love you so much! You scared me really bad! How could you do this to me? To all of us! You know, when I told Frank, he was devastated! We thought you were going to die! You wanted to die. Why did you want that!? Damn, I cannot live without you! But not only me. What about our parents? What about the band? Those guys are practically our brothers! They love you! We all need you! Mikes, I am so scared! How can I help you? What is wrong with you? I just want you to be happy! I never knew it was that bad. I should have seen it coming! God, this is all my fault! Why was I not there for you? I'm so selfish, I'm such a bad brother! You shouldn't have had to deal with everything on your own. Why didn't you come to me? Whyyy!?'
Gerard broke down, sobbing.
Mikey couldn't stand this monologue. It broke his heart to see his older brother cry like that and he felt guilty because he was the reason for this agony.
He also would have never thought that the guys would care so much, or at all, really. Him and Frank really were friends, well some kind of closer acquaintances.
Mikey didn't think that Frank actually saw him as a friend, but obviously he did.
So there's even more people upset by what he had done.
Even though Mikey was filled to the brink with guilt right now, he still didn't regret the suicide attempt. He still wanted to die and he was determined to try it again and succeed this time. He didn't want to leave Gerard behind, or Frank or his parents or the rest of his band, but his life was complete and utter trash at this point.
He'd seen what he could do to people by ending his life, but so what? You sometimes have to be selfish and make some sacrifices to get what you want.
This didn't make him a bad person. And if it did, then not for long.
Gerard was still sobbing now, lying flat on Mikey's body. The desperation was just oozing off him In waves that seemed almost tangible.
Mikey felt really tired all of a sudden. He didn't like the sight of his body in the hospital bed, but he still moved closer towards it. There was a bit of space on his body's other side, which was not occupied by his crying brother. He laid down on the mattress, surprised that it was actually possible because he was still in the ghost state.
He wondered whether it was possible for him to fall asleep like this, because he really needed to rest for a bit.
His eyes felt heavy, so he closed them, trying to think about nothing at all.
This was a hard task, considering the distraught noises coming from Gerard. He still managed to relax, though and he slowly fell into a much needed slumber.

Notes

Wow, Gerard's rant... so many exclamation marks! What do you think?