Frankie Baby

Franks pov
The next day at school was horrible. I had gotten up late and my head hurt from crying into my pillow. My socks were mismatched which drove me nuts and the image of Sammy and Gerard plagued my dreams. I got one to two hours of sleep and I couldn’t function properly. I hated to admit it but I was constantly on the look out for gerard. The whole day I haden’t seen him and I walked in and out of classes in a daze. I sighed and yanked open my locker , papers spilling out. All through my classes were filled with headaches and complete angst. I rushed to pick up the scattered papers strewn across the hallway. I prayed no one would pick up the papers for me for once. I poured my heartache onto the stray pieces of paper. All through class I wrote small blurbs of poetry. English had always been my favorite subject and words seemed to flow freely today. I snatched up the last piece of paper and stuffed them back into my locker lazily. I was tired and my body ached. I wanted to cuddle up and potentially sleep for a few hours. I hated gerard for what he did to me. But at the same time I wanted him to lull me to sleep like he did on the nights when I couldn’t close my eyes. I remembered one night he held me till the crack of dawn. My head pounded again at the thoughts of our relationship. I rubbed my temples and pressed my head against the cool lockers. The whole day had been thoughts of Gerard. No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get him off my brain. I took a deep breath and exhaled through my nose. Finally I pulled away from the locker and walked off to my next class with only new lines to add to my poetry.
Gerards pov
I had no intention of practically stalking Frank at school. But with my slightly tipsy state of mind , I went along with it anyway. To be completely honest , I was so fucking hungover I didn’t think I was going to make it out of bed. But since Mikey was a stubborn fuck , he actually pulled me out of my warmth capsule. My head felt like it were going to crack in half. After Frank had walked away from me I completely lost it. I sat in the snow for a few minutes just pounding at the street. Id rather freeze in your arms than be warm undercovers. Everything i touched was immediately demolished. After that I drank and I drank. Hell , I drank so much I couldn’t move. I screamed and cried until I couldn’t anymore. My voice was harsh and raspy from all the screaming i’d done. I still smelled like cheap fucking beer because I never bothered to shower. The sunlight practically ripped my eyeballs out of my skull. My shirt was crumpled and my jacket was creased. My hair was wrecked and my eyes bloodshot. I knew I looked like shit , I had no one to impress. When I drank , flashbacks from the month flickered in and out of my head with every bottle down. I rested the back of my head on the window behind me. I watched Frank pull open his locker. Papers fluttered out , scattering all over the place. His eyes widened slightly when they flew out. His natural perky glow was dead. His hair wasn’t as bad as mine but it was slightly dishevled. He had dark rings under his eyes giving him an undead look. God I just wanted to sleep with him. I didn’t want sex , I just wanted to sleep. I wanted his plushy back pressed against my chest , his slow breathing reassuring me he was there. Randomly a stray paper flew at my feet. For a few minutes I looked at it with disinterest , when I looked up Frank was gone. I looked back down at the paper flipping it over with my foot. What caught my eye was Frank’s neat cursive and writing. Immediately I bent down and grabbed the paper.
“We are homeless in one way or another
whether we’ve lost ourselves to lust
Inflamed passions for things desired; forgotten the other.
Wandering aimlessly in love with something that will only collect dust.
Or perhaps we’ve been led into the wilderness by some radiant lover , just to be left in the cold.
A distant memory , and the warmth of home.
What are we then to do?
Because in the heat of bliss , we swore we would never love another.
Can there be any hope for their retention , in its breaking?
We have all made mistakes.
And God i’ve made mistakes.
But my mistakes haven’t made me. My eyes started to water when I read the next blurb. My chest ached painfully , I clutched my chest before continuing to read.
Thrown off Kilter
None of us would have thought
We’d be who we are now
When we were still little
Eyes wide to possibility
Who could have known
We’d witness such depravity?
F.I His last words rang through my head. My breathing accelerated and the last two lines bounced around in my skull , rocking me to my very core. The feeling to throw up rose again in my stomach. I rushed to the exit of the school , going against the crowd , bile rising in my throat. My shoulders bumped against random kid’s earning me “Watch it.” My fingers trembled from clutching the paper so hard. When I bursted through the silver doors I rounded the corner. From there I hunched over vomited all the whiskey from yesterday. The alcohol burned my throat and tears ran down my face. My knees buckled when I finished vomiting. My vision was spinning and my brain was threatening to split my skull. The cold snow did nothing to help me. So i just sat against the school next to my own vomit. I buried my clammy hands into my stinging eyes. “F-fuck.” I stubbered out while rubbing my eyes harder. I’ve already done enough crying already. “Fuck.” I said quieter , tears wet my palms. Stop fucking crying , hold yourself together! I cried a little harder at my own harshness. I was an absolute fucking mess without him. I closed my eyes tightly , like a barrier for tears. I needed to talk to him. I needed to tell him what happened. I couldn’t even go 24 hours without him. Fuck i needed a cigarette.

Notes

hello!
do not get flustered little doves its getting better! THE POETRY IS BEING AS AN OCEAN LYRICS. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH , I JUST HAD TO.
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