If You Stay....

I sat in my living room, curled up on the sofa in my grey, oversized hoody as scenes of the walking dead flashed before my eyes. I had never been a fan of zombies previously, but this TV series was intense! I stared at the screen, my heart pounding as Rick slowly wandered through the abandoned hospital when a loud knock suddenly came from the front door. I jumped at the sound of it, laughing with relief as I slowly made my way towards the door, a hand resting on my small, concealed bump as I opened the door.

To my surprise, it was Lindsey.

I stood in the doorway, my eyes widening in shock, not just at her sudden arrival but at her appearance; I had never seen her look so rough before. Black mascara trailed down her cheeks, her white dress soaked through as she stood shivering on my door step. “Jesus christ Linds, are you ok” I said, inviting her inside. She shook her head as I led her into the kitchen, flicking on the kettle. “No, no I’m not okay…. He’s such an arsehole” She whimpered, sitting down in a nearby chair as she placed her head in her hands, bursting into tears. I stood there awkwardly for a moment, unsure of what to say. I knew exactly why she was crying, Gerard had finally left her. Of course, I felt bad for her, I mean Lindsey had always been really nice to me but Gerard…. what we had was special, something that we both desperately wanted to hang onto. Besides, it wasn’t just about us anymore.

It was just a shame he couldn’t have done it sooner.

I pulled up a chair in front of her, lifting her head by her chin and looking into her eyes. “There’s no point crying over him sweetheart, he’s not worth it” I said softly. Lindsey shook her head, wiping away the tears as she sat shivering in front of me. I sighed, grabbing her a towel from the bathroom before wrapping it around her shoulders. “Thank you” She mumbled. “I don’t know what I did wrong Frank, I gave that man everything and this is how he treats me? Was I really such a bad person?” She added, her eyes locking with mine as she waited expectantly for an answer. I couldn’t give her one. I swallowed hard as a wave of guilt began to rise up in my chest. I knew why she had come here, she wanted answers. She clearly couldn’t find Gerard so she was coming to me to try and and find out why he had done this to her. Well I had them alright, it was hiding under my damn hoody.

At least I hoped it was.

“When did he leave?” I asked, rising up from my chair, there was a sharp pain in my back now which was making walking slightly difficult. I made her a coffee, failing to notice the look of confusion on her face as she rose from her seat, placing her hands on her hips. The tears were gone now, all that was left was a look of confusion and anger as she stared menacingly at me. “He didn’t leave me Frank, I found this in his coat” She replied sternly, handing me a piece of paper. I took it cautiously, opening it to find a picture of my baby on it. My heart skipped a beat, he really did care. “What’s this supposed to mean?” I said, shrugging my shoulders. Lindsey narrowed her eyes, sending a chill down my spine as I suddenly felt rather afraid of her. She knew. She had to have, right? “He’s been having an affair and it seems he’s gone and gotten some whore pregnant. He never wanted kids with me, what makes her so special?” She yelled.
I said nothing. What exactly could I say? Actually its me your fiancee was having an affair with? If she didn’t kill me then she’d probably kill my baby and that was the last thing I wanted.

“Lindsey just calm down….” I stared only for to quickly cut me off. “And apparently he was planning on leaving me too! Did you know about this?” She shouted, stepping closer towards me. I backed into the kitchen counter, I didn’t want this, I had never wanted this. All I wanted was an easy life, an easy life and to be happy. Not to much to ask for is it? I quickly shook my head, hoping it would try and calm her down. “You must have! How else would you have known? Do you know where he is? Frank if you know where he is you have to tell me now!” She screamed, her face a mere inch from mine.

My face twisted into a sneer as I grabbed her by the shoulders, holding her at arms length. “Lindsey, shut the fuck up!” I yelled, immediately silencing her. “Look, I don’t know where he is, I haven’t seen him in days. I think you should go home and wait for him, he’ll have to go home sooner of later” I said sternly, watching the anger quickly fade from her face as she slowly nodded. She began to walk out of my apartment, apologising for her behaviour as she left.
I watch her leave, pressing my back against the doorframe as I slide down it to the floor; sighing with relief as I placed a hand on my bump. If she had gotten any closer, she would have noticed and everything would suddenly be out in the open. Footsteps suddenly echoed down the hall. I looked up from the ground, shaking my head with disappointment as Gerard slowly emerged from the bathroom, a look of shame plastered upon his face as he stood at the far end of the hall.

“You have a lot of explaining to do” I said sternly.

*****
I stormed out of the apartment, ignoring Gerard’s plea’s for me to come back inside. I didn’t want to hear it, not anymore. It was all lies. Everything that man had said to me was nothing but a lie. He had no intention of leaving Lindsey. He had no intention of staying with me or doing right by me. To him, I was nothing but a booty call, someone to call on when he felt horny. It made me feel sick, I can’t believe he was use me like that! I jumped into my car, turning the keys in the ignition and starting the engine. I sat there for a moment, listening to Gerard bang on the car window. “Don’t do this Frank, you know I love you- why can’t we just talk about this?” He cried, banging his hand against the window. Love? That man didn’t know what love was. I sped off, tears trailing down my cheeks as I mindlessly drove through the town; unsure of where to go.

I couldn’t go back there.

I couldn’t go to Mikey’s.

There was only one place I could go.

I turned left at the junction and began making my way over to Ray’s, the tears blurring my vision slightly as I flicked on the radio, the sound of Muse’s new song Survival erupting from the speaks as I drove; I just wanted to forget about him completely. I hoped this baby wasn’t his. At least that way it wouldn’t have to go through the same heartache I did. I pulled up outside his house, texting him to come outside when a sharp pain suddenly flared up in my stomach, making me wince in pain. I clenched my fist, feeling the pain die down as Ray came outside, walking over to my car and taking a seat in the passenger seat. “Hey man what’s… jesus Frank are you ok?” He asked, concern rising in his voice as he turned my face to look at him. I instantly burst into tears, telling him everything that had been happening. When I had finished he slumped back in his seat, staring out of the car window and straight ahead. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, his face was completely emotionless. “Ray? Ray please say something” I said quietly, trying to ignore the pain in my stomach.

It was getting worse.

Ray sighed, running a hand through his hair before looking back at me, a thin smile forming on his face. “You’re still my friend Frank, don’t look so worried. I’m not gonna do a Gerard on you” He joked, nudging me on my arm. I tried to smile but the emotional pain still felt too raw. “Listen, I think theres something we need to talk about” Ray started, opening his mouth to tell me something when I cried out in pain; a white hot pain seared through my stomach. Tears streamed from my eyes as I doubled over in agonising pain, something was wrong.

I think I was losing the baby.

Notes

So what was Ray going to tell Frank?
Is Frank losing the baby?

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