Laugh with me

As we step into the room both Linda and and Matt go silent as they turn their heads to look over at us. Linda looks at me with concern and pity written all over her face and when I tilt my head to look at Matt he looks slightly upset as he stands up from his chair and crosses the room to me. "Are you ok?" He asks softly as his hands come up to cup my cheeks, his eyes searching my face. Anthony steps past us to join Linda at the table and I turn my head back in their direction as I say "We'll be right back." I take Matts hand and lead him from the room, taking him back down the hall into the living room and when we're alone he says "What's going on?" "Linda and Anthony think you're my boyfriend and I thought maybe we should talk about that." "Well we are, aren't we?" He asks softly, looking unsure and I take a deep breath before saying "We are?" "Well yeah I just thought.....I mean I don't just sleep with anyone, I'm not that type of guy and...." I cut him off by pressing my lips to his and Matt kisses back softly before pulling away and I say "I didn't know if you felt the same way. I've never had a boyfriend before and...." "It's alright, it doesn't have to be a big thing. It just means that the way we've been the last twenty four hours is the way we can be all the time." I smile as I think about the last day I've spent with Matt and all the affection he's shown me and I realise that that's what I've been wanting all along and I thought I wanted it with Frank but it turns out I want it more with Matt. I lean in to kiss him again and Matts warm hands gently slide down to rest on my lower back, holding me to him as his lips slowly move with mine. When we go back into the kitchen we are holding hands and both Anthony and Linda look up when they hear us, a knowing smile on both their faces and when we sit down Linda says "So how long have you guys been together? Why didn't you tell me Gee?" "Just since yesterday" I say softly and Matt squeezes my hand reassuringly under the table. Linda smiles a little wider and says "This is so cute" and I feel my face go bright red as Anthony laughs and says "Don't embarrass him."

The afternoon passes slowly and Matt gets a phone call and has to leave but he promises to call me later and after he leaves Anthony joins Linda and I in the living room where we are watching tv and says "I can't find Frank, he's not answering his phone and he's not at any of the usual places I would expect him to be." I bite my bottom lip, my stomach churning at the thought of what he did to me earlier and I know I will have bruises tomorrow but I also feel guilty that he ran off because of me. "I think I might know where he is" I say softly as I stand up and I leave the room, heading towards the back door and I make my way down the back yard and just into the woods behind the house where the tree house we used to play in every day as little kids sits. When I reach the tree I look up and see it, looking slightly run down but still there and I slowly climb up the ladder, Frank coming into view as I reach the top. Frank is sitting in the corner with his knees pulled up to his chest, a lit cigarette hanging from his mouth and when he sees me he looks surprised before his face drops and he looks a combination of sad and angry. "What are you doing here?" He asks, his voice hard as he takes another drag on the cigarette, blowing the smoke out and I cough lightly. "Anthony and Linda are worried about you" I tell him and he shrugs and says "Tell them I'm fine then." "Why don't you come in and tell them yourself?" I ask and he frowns at me and says "Why are you here? I don't want you near me." I drop my gaze to the floor, biting the inside of my cheek to keep my tears in before looking back up at him and saying "Why are you being like this? I thought we were best friends and...." "I don't want a fag for a best friend, do you have any idea what people at school say about you?" "Yeah and I don't care what they think." "Well I do. I'm sick of being beaten up because of you, I'm sick of copping so much shit because you're a fag." "Oh" I say softly, not knowing what to say and Frank snaps and says "Why can't you just be normal? Being gay is just gross." "You never used to think so" I say softly and Frank inhales sharply and says "What did you say?" "When we were eight and I had just moved in, do you remember you used to like to play dress up and wear your moms lipstick? You even kissed me and...." Frank lunges across the small space between us, knocking me onto my back as he leans over me, his hands clenched into fists in the front of my shirt as he says "Don't you ever tell anyone about that ever again." I nod as I start to silently cry and Franks murderous expression drops as he backs off me and I slowly sit up again as Frank sighs and says "Please don't cry." I stare at him in disbelief through the tears before turning to leave and as I go to climb down the ladder Frank reaches out and wraps his hand around my wrist, causing me to turn around and when I look into Franks eyes he looks pained as he says "I'm sorry Gee."

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