I'm Not Okay

“Are you sure you wanna tell Ray that you’re pregnant?” Gerard asked as he pulled out his phone.

“I think just to be safe we’ll stick with the adoption story but he still needs to know.” I said as I rubbed the bump again, Gerard looked at my stomach longingly. “Wanna feel?”

He nodded and came over to me and placed both hands on each side of my bump and rubbed small circles and rested his forehead on my bump and started whispering things to the baby. I couldn’t really hear what he was saying but I heard the words, “daddy” and “love” so I’m guessing they were good things. When he finished he kissed my belly and pulled away, but his eyes remained locked with mine, I tried to look away but I just couldn’t. And before a blink of an eye, his lips were on mine.

I haven’t gotten any down there attention since the baby was conceived so my dick twitched and I guess Gerard could tell because the kiss got more heated and before I knew it we were on my sofa; me on my back and Gerard on top of me. When Gerard shoved his tongue down my throat my dick got fully hard and I felt Gerard smirk against my lips as his handed wandered down and he started to palm me through my jeans. I broke away from the kiss when I started to feel lightheaded from the lack of air, but not Gerard, he moved so his lips were attacking my neck and soon enough he found my weak spot and started to nip at it. My hands tangled themselves in his hair and I started to pull on it while I let out embarrassing noises. I wish everyday could be like this – wait, everyday can t be like this because he’s married and I’m just his baby daddy.

The more I thought about this the limper my dick went and my moans came to a stop. Gerard noticed this too and removed his mouth from my neck and looked at me, his eyes full of concern.

“What’s wrong Frankie?” He asked.

“Don’t call me that.” I said as I shoved him off of me then I got off the sofa and headed upstairs to the nursery. When I got there tears were already falling down my face and I was having a problem controlling my sobs. I went over to the box that had his crib and I started to open it.

“Frank what happened?” Gerard asked from the doorway, my back was facing him so I stayed that way and dried my eyes.

“Nothing, did you call the guys?” I asked as I started to pull things out of the box.

“Yeah they’re on their way, what’s wrong?” He asked, I could tell he was closer to me, like right behind me.

“Nothing.” I said.

“Frank,” He placed his hand on my shoulder and that’s when I exploded.

“Stop it! You can’t do this to me! I’m in love with you and you know it! Yet you keep messing with me! You already made your choice! You can’t have Lynz and me at the same time!” I yelled at him, he had backed away and I could tell he was about to cry. He opened his mouth to speak but was cut short by the front door opening.

“Frank! Gerard! Where are you guys?” Ray called out.

“Distract him.” I hissed at Gerard, I wasn’t wearing my hoodie so I rushed into my room and pulled on the big ones and grabbed a pillow just in case. When I thought I didn’t look pregnant I headed downstairs to find Gerard, Mikey, and Ray sitting on my sofa.

“Is this about the band? Because we’re not supposed to start working for another month.” Ray asked.

“Its not, I just wanted to tell you something.” I said as I played with my fingers.

“Go on.” He pressed.

“I’m gonna have a baby.”

“WHAT? You knocked someone up?” Ray asked wide eyed.

“No I’m adopting.”

Mikey gave me a weird look but I saw Gerard on his phone and seconds after Gerard put his phone away Mikey’s beeped and once he read it he nodded.

“Why? You’re twenty-four, you have a whole life, you’re a rock star, why ruin it with a baby?” okay ouch.

“It’s already been decided. He’ll be here in about three months.”

“Three months?”

“He hasn’t been born yet, but I already love him. Please be supportive, I’ve had enough to deal with I just need some friends.” I begged.

“Okay Frank, I support you.”

“Thanks Ray.” I smiled at him.

“What’s with the pillow?” He gestured to the pillow that was hiding my baby bump.

“He’s my best friend.” I said as I snuggled closer to the pillow.

“How do you know it’s a he?” Mikey asked.

“I’ve done my research.” I sassed.

After that things were pretty laid back, I refused to look at Gerard or speak to him though. Gerard and Ray assembled the crib and dresser and put up some shelves while Mikey made the bedding and put away the clothes and I “supervised” everything to make sure it was just the way I liked it. It was dark when we finished but we had the room pretty much ready by the time it was dark outside. Ray said he had to leave so I thanked him and he wished me good luck with the baby. Then it was just Mikey, Gerard, and I left.

“So adoption?” Mikey asked.

“Yeah, that what I wanna tell the public, that I adopted him. I don’t him to be looked at like a freak baby.” I said as I rubbed my bump.

“Bryce won’t feel like that.” Gerard said, I ignored him.

“Bryce?” Mikey asked.

“Bryce Antonio Iero, that’s his name.” I said with a smile.

“That’s really cute.” Mikey said with a smile.

“Thanks.”

“Okay well we better get going.” Mikey said, I think he picked up on me being mad at Gerard, Gerard tried to protest but Mikey had to drag him out of my house. Hopefully things will start to clear up.

Notes

Remeber when I used to upfdate on a regualarly.... In case you didnt get what I was hinting at, updates arent gonna be so regualr from now on, school is starting to get hard.

Till next we meet my killjoys