Truth Be Told

*Gerard’s P.O.V*

Friedman still won’t tell me if he’s still alive. Honestly it’s killing me not knowing. If he’s dead I don’t think I could live with all the guilt and regret. I’ve been good, I don’t throw my food anymore or attack the nurses anymore.

“Hello Gerard, it’s good to hear that you aren't beating up any of the nurses.” Friedman said scaring me out of my thoughts.

“When can I leave? Is Frank okay?”

“I think if you keep behaving, in a week. Here I want you to read this and think about it Gerard.” With that she handed me a piece of notebook paper that was folded in half, and left. I knew what it was right away and I was afraid of what it said. I was afraid that it would be an angry letter telling me to die. I would total understand that because he should after I left him to defend himself. What I read was worse than his anger.

Dear Gerard,

I wish you hadn’t chosen to stay in solitary confinement. It kills me that you didn’t want to see me anymore. I thought we were friends. You promised to help me. You did for a while. I wish you would have told me that you didn’t want to talk to me or see me anymore, I think that would have hurt less than you just disappearing. That’s all in the past now. I forgive you Gerard, I hope you can forgive me for whatever I did. I wish I could tell you this in person but, I will never. Gerard, I love you. I have been falling for you for a while. Hard. I hope you can forgive me and forget about me. Have a great life Gerard for me.

Love,
Frnk xo

I was in tears. I couldn’t stop them from falling. He loved me. I was so stupid, beyond stupid. I had killed him in the end. I was supposed to help him. My Frankie! The Frank that I had watched in his sleep. His little chest rising and falling gracefully. The look of serenity on his face. I had taken that from him. I had taken his perfect smile and his peace. I had taken Frank’s life just by being an ass. I’ve hurt so many people and, I’ve never noticed it. I’ve hurt Mikey too. God, how could I be such an ass. It felt as if my heart was breaking into a million different pieces from the realization of how many people I’ve hurt that I love.

I love Frank, I’ve realized that now. If he’s still alive I will tell him, and make him believe it. I can’t hurt anymore people. I need Frank in my life, for the rest of my life. I love my Frankie.

Notes

so next chapter, is frank still alive? keep reading! im sorry i keep holding the answer from you guys.