You're Beautiful To Me

When I wake up it's to bright lights and a constant low beeping. Unfortunately this is not an uncommon occurrence for me when I pass out so I immediately know I'm in the hospital. I turn my head to look for Frank and he launches himself onto the bed and ontop of me, crushing me slightly in his haste to pull me into his arms and squeeze the life out of me. "Baby, oh god baby you gotta stop scaring me like that" he sobs out as he buries his face in my neck and cries in relief. "What happened?" I ask and he pulls back and says "It wasn't a heart attack, the doctor can't find anything wrong. He thinks you had a severe anxiety attack considering how you were acting this morning." I nod, realising the despair I've felt all day is now gone. "So we can go home then?" I ask hopefully and he shakes his head as he says "No baby, they want to keep you overnight just incase." I cross my arms and pout as Frank sits back, straddling my thighs and he chuckles as he says "Don't be so dramatic, I'd rather be safe than insist on taking you home." Frank spends the afternoon with me and as the sun starts to set Anna starts to get more and more cranky and I say "Go home Frankie." "No fucking way, I'm not leaving you." "Babe Anna needs her warm bed at home, take her home, I'll still be here tomorrow." Frank sighs, knowing I've won the argument but he still pouts as he stands up and leans over to kiss me. We kiss for a few minutes, our tongues sliding together and I start to really get into it. My heart monitor starts beeping faster and faster and Frank pulls back, chuckling before giving me a sly smirk as his hand slides down my side and across the bulge of my half hard dick under the blanket. "Mmmm Frankie" I moan as my eyes slip closed and the monitor starts going wild and he pulls his hand away, leaving me disappointed as he says "Babe, you'll alert the nurse in a minute." "Fuck you you fucking tease" I say jokingly before adding "I better get so much action when I get home." Frank laughs loudly before saying "Whatever you like baby, I'll do it." I smile wide as I say "I'll hold you to that" and he leans in for another kiss as Anna starts to scream again and Frank pecks my lips before pulling away to turn around to her. He picks her up and cuddles her to his chest, her little face rubbing in his shirt as her screams die down. Frank leans over so I can press a soft kiss to her head before he puts her back in her seat and gathers all her stuff.

Once Frank is gone I slump back into the mattress and close my eyes, almost asleep again when a nurse comes in with a tray of food. She sits it on the table and wheels it over to me
and I open my eyes and watch her, not planning on eating any of the disgusting food on the tray. "Eat up hun, you need your strength" she tells me and I shoot her a weak forced smile before she leaves the room and I lay back, closing my eyes again. Half an hour later she comes back to see the food untouched and she sighs before picking it up and taking it away again. I'm feeling increasingly bored and sleep isn't coming to me so I grab the remote and turn the tv on but I don't get much watching done before a doctor comes in and closes the door behind himself. "Gerard" he starts and I can tell by his tone that this is yet another lecture about my eating and weight. I turn my attention to him and he begins telling me things I've heard a million times before. "You don't even care do you?" He suddenly snaps. I feel my mouth drop open at the way he's speaking to me and he comes over and unhooks all my monitors. "Come with me Gerard" he says and I slowly climb off the bed and follow him from the room. We get into an elevator at the end of the hall and we go down to the ground floor and when we step out I see the doors to the morgue. He starts walking towards them and I swallow hard as I follow him and he leads me into a room where there is a bed surrounded by three people. "Excuse me" the doctor says softly and they all turn to face us, all of their eyes red and swollen. "This is the guy?" The woman says and the doctor nods and I look between them confused. The doctor ushers me further into the room and the woman holds out her hand to me and I hesitantly take the last few steps to her, letting her grab my hand and I realise we are surrounding a young girl. "This is Katy. She's my twenty year old daughter and today she died because of her anorexia." I look at her and I see how thin she looks, all her bones prominent. "I'm so sorry" I choke out, feeling overwhelmed. "I understand you have a baby?" She asks and I nod, unable to speak. "Losing my baby is the worst pain I've ever felt, watching her slowly die for years hurt. You can't imagine how hard it is to watch someone you love just, slip away from you. I really hope your husband and your baby never have to feel what we feel right now." She starts to cry again and I feel my bottom lip quiver as I start to cry too and she offers me support even though I should be offering it to her. She pulls me into her arms and leans in to whisper "I wish the best for you honey, I hope you can find the strength to pull through this." We pull apart and she stares into my eyes through her tears and I see just how sincere she is. "I'm so sorry for your loss" I tell her and she squeezes my hand in thanks before I turn to leave the room, getting back out into the hallway and breaking down completely, sliding to the floor and curling up as I sob uncontrollably at the thought that that could be me and that I could cause Frank and Anna and Mikey that much pain.

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