The Boy With Scars

~Frank's point of view~
It has been a week since i made my plans to end it all. Now all i have to do it wait. Wait for the day when i'm alone, That day might be today

"Frank! We're going out to dinner then going back to his place. Don't stay up late. I'll be back tomorrow around ten A.M." Tessa called from the front room. I heard the door shut. Thank God she was gone. I went into her bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet, Tessa used to have trouble sleeping so she had a bunch of different brands of sleeping pills. I had done my research and knew how many to take of what to die. I put all the pills on the edge of the bathtub and went to my room. I changed into my favorite shirt and a pair of comfy pants. Then i grabbed a pen and some paper. I sat down on the toilet.
I stood up and glared at myself in the mirror.
Ugly, Fat, Stupid. i was all of those and so many more. Tears ran down my cheeks. I could do this. I had to do this. I just had to make sure i didn't fail like before, I sat down on the floor with the two pieces of paper two envelopes and my pen. I would write two letters. One to Tessa and one for her to give Gerard. I started hers first


Dear, Tessa
I'm sorry this had to happen and i'm sorry that you had to find me like this. I do love you and i don't want you to be sad or cry over my passing. Let's face it, I just wasn't meant to live, I think my fate has been set to end like this since i was born and there's nothing anyone could do. I just don't want to be here anymore Tessa and i'm sorry if this hurts you but it's what's best for all of us. I love you and if you love me like a brother as you say you do will you please give Gerard the envelope with his name on it? Please don't open it until it gets to him because i want him to read it first. Thanks. I love you. I have to go now so Goodbye. I'm sorry i was such a failure. I hope you and your boyfriend live a happy live without me. Goodnight.

-Frank

I put the note in The envelope with her name as tears ran down my face and onto the paper. I wish it didn't have to end like this. Now for Gerard.


Dear, Gee
Baby, I love you. I'm so very sorry our relationship had to end before it really began, And i'm sorry that you will never see me again. But more than anything i'm sorry i'll never see you laugh or smile again. I wish i could look into your eyes one last time and tell you i love you but i can't and this note is the best i could do. I'm just so tired, Darling and i hope you understand why i can't stay... I'm sorry it had to end like this and i know you might hate me, I know you might never ever forgive me for this but i love you and even if you don't forgive me i do want you to forget me. I want you to move on and fall in love and just be you. I want you to never let anyone bully you because you were friends with me- The failure that took his life. I wish i could go back and do things differently but i cant this is the end of my story but yours is just beginning, So i'm asking you to wait and be patient for the one you truly are meant to be with. I believe there is someone out there for you that isn't me but i also believe that you were it for me. There is no other person i want to spend my life with. And me staying....well that would just hurt us both in the long run because we would end up breaking up and you would move on and i would be so so very sad. So you see even if i did stay with you i would still have ended up killing myself just for a different reason. I love you and i don't want you to cry over me. I don't belong in this world. I don't belong anywhere.It's not your fault, It's not Tessa's either. It's mine. I was a mistake a failure. Please tell Tessa i'm sorry for the shortness of her note. I just....i can't....I'm sorry baby i'm sorry. I know you will never ever forgive me but i have to do this. I wish i was strong enough to live, For you. But i am a coward. also...When i am gone. After the funeral, assuming i have one I don't want you to keep this. I want you to burn this note and forget about me. Forget that i ever existed. Move on and find someone else. So long, And Goodnight...

Goodbye my love.
I'll never forget you even in death, I'll be watching.
-Frankie


I put his note in the envelope and cried and cried. I sat there for what must have been half an hour rocking on the floor crying. I reached up and grabbed my cell phone from where i had left it by the sink. I ran the water in the bath and sat down. Before i took the pills i had to do one last thing. I know i wasn't going to call him but after writing the note i had to. I dialed Gerard's number and waited.

He didn't answer and i didn't leave a message. I opened the bottles and poured the pulls into my hands, I took them all at once and laid down in the water my head going under. I closed my eyes and waited...I felt something pulling at my consciousness and suddenly everything was fading to black...Goodbye....

Notes

OMG I'M SORRY!! but this isn't the end i swear! i'm still going to update in gerard's pov So yea don't get to sad. I may have something up my sleeve?