Branches
The Hardest Part of this is Leaving You
The night sky looked so peaceful from the childhood treehouse; the stars glinting, comically aloof, making Frank’s eyes dance with enticing delight. The twenty-eight year old guitarist’s eyes filled with tears, thinking of how much Gerard would have loved this brilliant nighttime display. The tree house, resting tranquilly among the branches as it had for, Frank didn’t know how many years, was Gerard’s secret mountain top; the place that he treasured most, save the warm comfort that he found in Frank’s arms.
Alas, Frank knew that it was silly to think of Gerard at a time like this, but Frank had always been a silly type of person. Gerard was always on his mind, like a plague, but not a bad kind. The image of Gerard’s face was perpetually dancing his was through Frank’s mind – his sharpie tattoos, his phobia of needles, his Frank-inspired comic strips, his melodic voice, his everything. It was impossible for Frank to go more than five minutes without something bringing Gerard and his unique mannerisms to the fore-front of the low-key musician’s mind.
Frank decided on photographing the scene for his lover, since it was the only way he might be able to relay the flawless sight accurately. He fished out the professional grade camera that his beloved husband had gotten him for his twenty-sixth birthday. Frank smiled yet again at the memory of that day. Gerard had always encouraged Frank’s secret passion for photography, constantly assuring him that he was the most fantastic photographer that ever graced the earth. Frank would always laugh it off, but they both knew that every picture Frank took was taken for Gerard. That’s how it had always been. Since the day they had met, every move or breathe or glance that one would take would be to or for the other. Frank was Gerard’s better half, and Gerard was Frank’s pillar of strength. The two would never live without each other – it just wasn’t possible.
Frank could hear yelling from inside the Way’s household, the treehouse was only about one hundred feet away from the sliding glass door that was propped open to let the warm summer air inside. Frank was unsure what the argument consisted of, but he was positive that it centered on his ill-fated husband. The devoted man dismissed the argument, knowing that there was nothing he would be able to do to quell the pain and frustration, no matter how much he wanted to, so instead he focused his lens skyward and snapped a few still shots. His breath caught as he realized that he had perfectly captured a shooting star in one of the frames. Frank’s eyes welled with tears for the umpteenth time that day, knowing that his love’s favorite part about nighttime was a shooting star.
Frank got up from the pillows that he and Gerard would cuddle and sleep on most warm nights. It wasn’t that they didn’t have a place of their own, it was just that their place was just down the New Jersey Street, and so they took mighty advantage of the wooden sanctuary. Frank adjusted the blankets to that they looked decent, even though he was just going to come back to this spot once the nurses found him and kicked him out of his husband’s room.
“Gerard, darling, I brought the sky here for you,” the weaker half said in a hushed tone. He knew that Gerard was awake; the man was hardly able to sleep in the “calming” room.
“Oh, my dearest Frankie.” Gerard breathed sadly as he examined the small series of pictures that his love had taken for him. “The comet!”
“It was searching for you, Gee, it must have been.” Frank was almost crying now. He didn’t mean to, it was just that he wanted so badly for his husband to be able to see the night sky properly first-hand once more.
“Mister Way,” a stern voice chided Frank, and the teary eyed lover knew he must take his leave. He bent over Gerard’s flawless, sickly face and placed his lips placidly on his husband’s chapped mouth. Frank’s palm encased his husband’s jaw for a sacred moment before he turned away from the patient. A single tear fell upon Gerard’s cheek, but it went unnoticed to Frank.
The twenty-eight year old man spoke in a low voice to the nurse, “When can he come home, Delilah?”
“He can be discharged tomorrow, since he consented, but I don’t expect his to make it through the next 72 hours.” ***
Gerard and Frank walked through their threshold hand in hand for what might possibly be the last time. The couple wasted no time in getting Gerard into comfortable clothes before they began their short walk – on Gerard’s command – back to the ever-stronger’s childhood home where the couple’s families awaited to greet and send off the thirty-three year old. ***
The couple stumbled excited out the back doors for the last time, rushing to their mountain top after having a bittersweet farewell party with their beautifully compatible families. No one had cried, and that’s exactly how Gerard wanted it to be. The halves climbed the rickety ladder with smiles, the older going first, so Frank might catch him if it was needed.
Once inside Frank landed gingerly on top of his world and began to kiss him passionately and desperately. Gerard was weak, but he gave all his strength to his beloved Frankie one last time. Every movement was slow, calculated and full of the type of love that people only dream about. Every thrust was matched with a whispered nothing, yet the whispers were everything. Every touch was met with a surge of emotion that came from the deepest part of the two’s souls. Every sigh said more than anyone could have known. And when it was over, Frank dressed Gerard carefully and followed it by dressing himself – to preserve their dignity should anyone make the mistake of disturbing them now. The younger than collapsed on the ill, joyously as well as sadly.
“Do you remember the first time I showed you this, Sugar?” Gerard’s eyes had begun to fill with tears for the first time since he had been diagnosed. “I brought you up here at night and you were so awestruck at the night sky that you didn’t notice me pull that engagement ring out of my jacket pocket. I’m not sure to this day if you were happier about the stars or the diamond.”
“Gerard, the happiness that I felt toward the stars and the diamond I combined didn’t even come close to matching the happiness that I felt toward the fact, that in that moment, I knew we belonged to each other for eternity.” Frank felt a pair of shaky, dry lips fall tenderly on his hairline.
“I love you more than you will ever know.”
“Gerard, I do know. I can feel it in my heart and in my bones. I know. I love you too. Our love is immeasurable and unmatchable.” Gerard’s breathing became ragged for reasons not pertaining to sentimentality. His Frankie knew why. “Just know this Gerard; everything that I have ever done was for you – even before we met, because it was all leading up to it. My life was made for you. Every breath I take, every glance I steal, every word I write, every chord I smash, every picture I take, every word I speak is for you. It’s the manifestation of my eternal love for you. My perfect husband.” Gerard’s breathing was more labored now than Frank had ever heard it before, and Frank lifted himself to meet his dying husband’s emerald eyes for the last time, noticing that saltwater was cascading down both men’s cheeks. “The love of my life. My protector. My guide. My other, better half. My life was always, and will always be meant for you, and you alone. Time will never even touch what I feel now for you. I will follow you someday, into the unknown. I would today, but I know it would make you unhappy, but someday I will. As long as you’ll wait.”
“I can wait a lifetime for an eternity with you, my Frankie.” Gerard breathed his last sentence before Frank saw the light in his eyes flutter and dim.
Alas, Frank knew that it was silly to think of Gerard at a time like this, but Frank had always been a silly type of person. Gerard was always on his mind, like a plague, but not a bad kind. The image of Gerard’s face was perpetually dancing his was through Frank’s mind – his sharpie tattoos, his phobia of needles, his Frank-inspired comic strips, his melodic voice, his everything. It was impossible for Frank to go more than five minutes without something bringing Gerard and his unique mannerisms to the fore-front of the low-key musician’s mind.
Frank decided on photographing the scene for his lover, since it was the only way he might be able to relay the flawless sight accurately. He fished out the professional grade camera that his beloved husband had gotten him for his twenty-sixth birthday. Frank smiled yet again at the memory of that day. Gerard had always encouraged Frank’s secret passion for photography, constantly assuring him that he was the most fantastic photographer that ever graced the earth. Frank would always laugh it off, but they both knew that every picture Frank took was taken for Gerard. That’s how it had always been. Since the day they had met, every move or breathe or glance that one would take would be to or for the other. Frank was Gerard’s better half, and Gerard was Frank’s pillar of strength. The two would never live without each other – it just wasn’t possible.
Frank could hear yelling from inside the Way’s household, the treehouse was only about one hundred feet away from the sliding glass door that was propped open to let the warm summer air inside. Frank was unsure what the argument consisted of, but he was positive that it centered on his ill-fated husband. The devoted man dismissed the argument, knowing that there was nothing he would be able to do to quell the pain and frustration, no matter how much he wanted to, so instead he focused his lens skyward and snapped a few still shots. His breath caught as he realized that he had perfectly captured a shooting star in one of the frames. Frank’s eyes welled with tears for the umpteenth time that day, knowing that his love’s favorite part about nighttime was a shooting star.
Frank got up from the pillows that he and Gerard would cuddle and sleep on most warm nights. It wasn’t that they didn’t have a place of their own, it was just that their place was just down the New Jersey Street, and so they took mighty advantage of the wooden sanctuary. Frank adjusted the blankets to that they looked decent, even though he was just going to come back to this spot once the nurses found him and kicked him out of his husband’s room.
“Gerard, darling, I brought the sky here for you,” the weaker half said in a hushed tone. He knew that Gerard was awake; the man was hardly able to sleep in the “calming” room.
“Oh, my dearest Frankie.” Gerard breathed sadly as he examined the small series of pictures that his love had taken for him. “The comet!”
“It was searching for you, Gee, it must have been.” Frank was almost crying now. He didn’t mean to, it was just that he wanted so badly for his husband to be able to see the night sky properly first-hand once more.
“Mister Way,” a stern voice chided Frank, and the teary eyed lover knew he must take his leave. He bent over Gerard’s flawless, sickly face and placed his lips placidly on his husband’s chapped mouth. Frank’s palm encased his husband’s jaw for a sacred moment before he turned away from the patient. A single tear fell upon Gerard’s cheek, but it went unnoticed to Frank.
The twenty-eight year old man spoke in a low voice to the nurse, “When can he come home, Delilah?”
“He can be discharged tomorrow, since he consented, but I don’t expect his to make it through the next 72 hours.” ***
Gerard and Frank walked through their threshold hand in hand for what might possibly be the last time. The couple wasted no time in getting Gerard into comfortable clothes before they began their short walk – on Gerard’s command – back to the ever-stronger’s childhood home where the couple’s families awaited to greet and send off the thirty-three year old. ***
The couple stumbled excited out the back doors for the last time, rushing to their mountain top after having a bittersweet farewell party with their beautifully compatible families. No one had cried, and that’s exactly how Gerard wanted it to be. The halves climbed the rickety ladder with smiles, the older going first, so Frank might catch him if it was needed.
Once inside Frank landed gingerly on top of his world and began to kiss him passionately and desperately. Gerard was weak, but he gave all his strength to his beloved Frankie one last time. Every movement was slow, calculated and full of the type of love that people only dream about. Every thrust was matched with a whispered nothing, yet the whispers were everything. Every touch was met with a surge of emotion that came from the deepest part of the two’s souls. Every sigh said more than anyone could have known. And when it was over, Frank dressed Gerard carefully and followed it by dressing himself – to preserve their dignity should anyone make the mistake of disturbing them now. The younger than collapsed on the ill, joyously as well as sadly.
“Do you remember the first time I showed you this, Sugar?” Gerard’s eyes had begun to fill with tears for the first time since he had been diagnosed. “I brought you up here at night and you were so awestruck at the night sky that you didn’t notice me pull that engagement ring out of my jacket pocket. I’m not sure to this day if you were happier about the stars or the diamond.”
“Gerard, the happiness that I felt toward the stars and the diamond I combined didn’t even come close to matching the happiness that I felt toward the fact, that in that moment, I knew we belonged to each other for eternity.” Frank felt a pair of shaky, dry lips fall tenderly on his hairline.
“I love you more than you will ever know.”
“Gerard, I do know. I can feel it in my heart and in my bones. I know. I love you too. Our love is immeasurable and unmatchable.” Gerard’s breathing became ragged for reasons not pertaining to sentimentality. His Frankie knew why. “Just know this Gerard; everything that I have ever done was for you – even before we met, because it was all leading up to it. My life was made for you. Every breath I take, every glance I steal, every word I write, every chord I smash, every picture I take, every word I speak is for you. It’s the manifestation of my eternal love for you. My perfect husband.” Gerard’s breathing was more labored now than Frank had ever heard it before, and Frank lifted himself to meet his dying husband’s emerald eyes for the last time, noticing that saltwater was cascading down both men’s cheeks. “The love of my life. My protector. My guide. My other, better half. My life was always, and will always be meant for you, and you alone. Time will never even touch what I feel now for you. I will follow you someday, into the unknown. I would today, but I know it would make you unhappy, but someday I will. As long as you’ll wait.”
“I can wait a lifetime for an eternity with you, my Frankie.” Gerard breathed his last sentence before Frank saw the light in his eyes flutter and dim.
Ya, I try but its like "Uhm...tears....you there?"
4/8/13