You're Not In This Alone

"So your dad's doing ok?" Ryan asks as we lay in bed together and I nod, burying my face further into his chest. "Yeah, he's a little sketchy on some things but he seems to know what's going on." "Good baby, I'm glad he's ok." We lay in silence for a while and I decide to give in to what I'm feeling in the moment and I lean up, sealing my lips to Ryan's. He immediately starts kissing back as he leans up and lowers me back onto the bed, leaning down over me as we kiss. When we break for air he pants out "What are we...." "Can we just go with it? See what happens?" Ryan nods and leans back in to kiss me again and our hands start to wander each other's bodies, our clothes slowly coming off until we're both naked on the bed, Ryan kneeling between my open legs. "Ry, I think I wanna..." But just then the door flies open and Brendon and the girl from the diner come stumbling in cackling to each other, clearly drunk and I panic, letting out a small scream as I shove Ryan off me and grab the blanket, pulling it over myself and starting to cry. Brendon starts laughing loudly and the girl joins him before Brendon says "Oh shit, sorry, didn't realise Ruby was here or that you would be fucking" just as the girl says "Wow, nice dick Ry." "Get the fuck out" Ryan yells and I cower in fear as I start to sob. "Oh Shh baby, Ruby oh god it's ok, no one is going to hurt you. Baby it's alright" he tries to reassure me as he pulls me into his arms and the girl cackles again and says "Geez Ry what were you doing to her?" I cling to him and bury my face in his neck as I sob and he turns his head to yell at them to get out again. Brendon speaks up, suddenly sobered up a bit. "Shit I'm sorry Ruby" before he grabs the girls arm and drags her from the room. "Hey hey baby it's alright, they're gone now, it's just you and me." "Clothes" I whimper and Ryan says "What?" "I want my clothes" I tell him and he says "Of course baby, hang on a second." He climbs off the bed after I slide off his lap and hands me my clothes, turning his back to me while he pulls his boxers back on so I can redress. Once I'm done I sit on the edge of the bed and grab my shoes. Ryan turns back around and says "Where are you going baby?" "I want my dad" I tell him and he sighs before saying "Do you want me to come with you?" I shake my head as I stand up, walking from the room and running down the hallway and out the front door. As the door slams behind me I hear Ryan's angry voice yell out "Brendon you stupid fuck, what the fuck were you doing? And what the fuck are you doing here Liz?" I take off down the hall and out into the street, hailing a cab and going to the hospital. I rush up to pa's room and when I go in I see dad asleep and pa laying in his bed watching tv. "Ruby?" He says and I lock eyes with him before running across the room to him, starting to cry again. "Daddy I....I..." "Hey take a deep breath baby, whatever it is it'll be ok." I take a few deep breaths before saying "I almost....with Ryan and his roommate barged in and I panicked and I don't....I think I ruined it and I....I think I love him and he told me he loves me and I couldn't say it back but I really think I do and now I think I destroyed everything and I don't know what to do." "Hey hey it's alright. If Ryan truly loves you he'll understand baby, especially about the sex thing. Anyone who cares about you even a little would understand that. Don't let him pressure you baby, you do it only when you're ready." I nod as I sit in the chair beside the bed and rest my head on the mattress, looking up at him. His hand comes down to gently stroke through my hair as he says "It'll all be ok baby girl I promise you. Do you want me to talk to him?" I shake my head and he says "So you love him baby?" "I think so." "It's ok to love him baby, he's good for you and dad and I will support whatever you feel, always." I nod as I close my eyes and say "I love him daddy, I just don't know how to say the words to his face. Every time I try I just...." "You love me?" I snap my head up to see Ryan walking into the room and my mouth drops open. "Sorry, I just had to make sure you got here ok." Pa reaches out and squeezes my hand and I look back at him. "You can do it" he mouths to me and smiles reassuringly and I smile back and nod, standing up and crossing the room to Ryan. I take his hands in mine as I look up at his face and say "Ry, I love you." His face splits into a wide smile as he says "I love you too Ruby." We both lean in for a kiss and as our lips touch dad's voice says "Awwww" and I peck Ryan's lips before turning and seeing him sitting in the chair beside pa's bed smiling at us and I flip him off, making both him and pa laugh. I turn back to Ryan and he's still smiling wide as he leans down for another kiss. When we break apart he leans down to rest his forehead against mine as he says softly "You wanna come back home with me?" I bite my lower lip as I think about it and he smiles and says "That's incredibly cute baby and it's kinda turning me on" and I giggle and pull away from him, crossing the room back to dad and pa and hug them both, telling them I'm going. "Remember baby girl, only when you're ready" pa tells me and I nod before pulling away and leaving the room with Ryan.

When we get back to his place Brendon is laying on the couch smoking a joint and as we walk in he offers it to Ryan and he takes a puff, offering it to me and I shake my head, wary of all the bad experiences I've had with it. As Ryan hands the joint back the girl, Liz, walks in with a beer in her hand and she walks over and hugs Ryan, her hand wandering up his back and wraps around the back of his neck as she presses her body against his and leans in to whisper in his ear. Ryan grabs her shoulder and pushes her off him and I sigh in relief that he's not into her like that and she turns to look at me. "Really Ry? Her, when you could have me?" She says, gesturing to her body and I scoff at her ego. "What's your problem bitch?" She snaps at me as she stumbles towards me and Brendon jumps up and grabs her. "Take it easy Liz" he tells her and she spits out "Whatever, Ry obviously has a thing for ugly whales." I bite the inside of my cheek to keep in my tears as I turn and leave the room, going into the bathroom and locking the door behind me.

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