If Lies Could Speak The Truth Then You'd Know Me

I stare at the roof Fluffy Cat resting on my stomach purring away. Gee and Mikey are at school. I won't be returning it'd be dangerous for the baby if I did. If things get physical or if I can't handle it and try to... I scratch his ears gently smiling at the blue eyes Christmas present. He'd start to shed soon wouldn't he? Spring was just around the corner. It's March so it makes sense. Maybe we should get a lint roller? I don't know and as soon as I hear the door I bound down the stairs tackling Gee. "I missed you!" I say whilst clinging to him and he smiles and says "missed you too." It seems rehearsed in the way it happens daily. "Mikey, wanna play Mario?" I look at him hopeful the cabin fever starting to get to me. "Not today I got homework." He replies and I continue to cling to Gee. "I got homework too Ana." "Oh okay." And I sulk away picking up fluffy cat and heading to the bedroom laying down and closing my eyes to fall asleep to wake up in the dead of night in a cold sweat an shaking after a nightmare brought on by my father. I sit up and climb out of the bed walking into the bathroom. I start the water in the shower and sit in the hot spray playing with the razor before doing something I definitely will regret.
ten eleven twelve thirteen. Unlucky thirteen for each I get out and pull on long sleeves getting back into be and resuming sleep. I Just feel so alone now.

Notes

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